David: Sophomore Year (Three Daves #1) (7 page)

A Peek inside David’s Head

During Chapter 1 of Dave: Junior Year

(Three Daves, Part 2)

She won’t look at me. Chris is giving me updates on every kid we ever went to high school, grade school, pre-school with, but Jen’s at the other end of the bar, talking to Kate and not even glancing toward me. I tune into Chris’ prattling. She’s a funny girl with loads of energy. Hasn’t changed a bit. It’s strange that I can feel like a completely different person from who I was in high school, and yet so many of the other people I know are still up to the same old bullshit.

Jen laughs at something Kate said. Kate never struck me as all that humorous. I wonder if Jen’s purposely avoiding looking at me. Playing hard to get—or intentionally keeping her distance? I hope she’s not still holding a grudge for what I did to her last year.

I really have to pee, so I excuse myself when Chris pauses for air. The second I hop off the bar stool and head for the bathroom, Jen takes a step toward me.

“Where are you going?” she asks.

I smile inside. She’s not grudging. She’s trying to play hard to get, and she’s really, really bad at it. “Bathroom—if that’s okay with you,” I answer.

I go straight to Jen after I come out of the bathroom. I love talking to her. We talk about anything. Everything. Nothing. It doesn’t matter. We just like to talk to each other. Her friends leave to go to that cheesy Quarters bar, but Jen stays with me. I’m glad. The guys show up, and we head down into the basement to check out the open mic night. It’s a flakey thing to do, but it’s something different, better than hanging out with Greeks at Quarters or a bunch of drunken underclassmen at a party.

The usual crowd is here. That Ellie girl gets up to sing a song. She’s gorgeous without even trying, and she has this tough-as-nails attitude that’s very appealing. She’s the kind of girl you don’t have to worry about hurting. She has a good, strong voice. When she finishes singing, her eyes turn purposefully toward me, and she holds my gaze. It’s only for a couple of seconds, but it’s a powerful two seconds. I’m definitely gonna have to follow up on that, but not tonight. Tonight I’m hanging with Jen.

This really isn’t Jen’s scene. She can’t stop giggling. She’s cracking me up. The acts tonight are a bit over the top for me, too. Jen’s about to lose it. This dufus is reciting a poem with words that rhyme with stench, and she’s about to lose it.

I lean over and whisper, “Don't be such a wench.”

She loses it. She busts out laughing and tears up the stairs. I nod to the guys, and we head up the stairs behind her. The dufus seems pretty indignant that we’re leaving in the middle of his performance. He raises the volume on his horrible poem, but who cares about him?

We go to Stan’s and shoot pool. Jen is low maintenance. She’s fine just hanging out, watching us play pool and taking a shot once in a while. I like having her around. She goes and stands by the jukebox, looking over the selections. I join her. I have a buzz going, and I’m feeling pretty good. I’m glad Jen and I are out having fun together. It’s been a long time since that’s happened. I stand behind her and rest my chin on her shoulder as I look at the music. She’s thinking about playing a One Direction song. I really shouldn't neglect her for so long—she clearly needs my musical guidance.

“What do you think of this?” I ask, reaching past her and pointing to a Jane’s Addiction tune.

Jen leans back on me and turns her head to the side. “You know what I think?”

“What?”

“I think I might need a refresher course,” she whispers into my ear.

She doesn’t mean it. She’s drunk. “I think you’re drunk,” I tell her and take a step back.

“Maybe I am.” She turns all the way around and wraps her arms around my waist. She presses herself against me, and I feel her warm body through our clothes. It feels nice. “But I still remember how to do certain things,” she says in a way that gets my full attention.

I would
love
to do certain things to her. I want to kiss her right now and take her home and tear off her clothes and lay her on my bed and do certain things with her. I want to fill her up and hear her make those sounds, those ecstatic, pleasure-filled, amazing sounds she made during our last time together. Sounds that were only for me. But I know she doesn’t mean it. She’s just drunk. In the morning, she’d regret it.

“Well then, if you remember, you won’t be needing any more lessons.” I pull her pretty hands off me. Her eyes open wide in embarrassment. I don’t want to hurt her again. “Come on, Jen,” I say, trying to soothe her. “We agreed—five times and no more. Never, ever. Remember? You’re the one who said it.”

“Yeah, you’re right,” Jen says a little too quickly. Shit. She’s upset. “I think it’s your turn.” She nods toward Fred, who’s coming up behind me.

I take the cue from him and tell her I’ll be right back. We need to talk more. Her advances might be coming from somewhere other than the beer she’s been pounding all night.

Jen is staring out the window when I come back. “Look, I think that’s Chris.” She points toward the bar across the street.

I look out and see Chris dancing on a table. That girl will do anything for attention. “Yep. That’s her.”

“You know what—I’m going over there. I’ll get a ride home with Chris’s friends. It’ll be easier.”

I can’t believe it, but I want her to leave. It’ll be better that way. If she stays, I might change my mind. That would be bad. I think we’re both feeling more than just the alcohol right now, and if I take her home, we’re going to become much more than friends. That would be bad. Because something will still probably happen with me and Ellie—and who knows who else? I can’t hurt Jen. Not again. Jen acts strong; Jen is strong, but Jen can also break. I watched her break last year. Even while she put up all that armor against me, I could see her breaking. I didn’t like it, and I won’t do it again.

Jen leaves quickly, and I’m relieved. No chance of changing my mind now. But even as the door closes behind her, I have an urge to run after her. I want to be with her. I want it so bad. But I stay where I am, not just for her, but for me. Because what if I’m wrong about how she’s feeling? What if she really is only in it for sex? What if I took her home and she skipped off in the morning and didn’t look back? I’m a coward. That’s why I don’t run and grab her and explain everything and let her decide for herself whether or not to take her chances. I know it’s better to just let her go. Better for her. Better for me.

I stand here and watch her go and let her think I’m not interested.
False face must hide what false heart doth know.
Fuckin’ Shakespeare.

Read the scene from Jen’s point of view in the first chapter of

Dave: Junior Year

(Three Daves, Part 2)

Acknowledgements

Unending gratitude to the powers that be at Omnific Publishing for giving this story a life beyond fanfiction and for not hesitating when I approached them about this reboot.

Thank you, thank you to everyone who read and loved the first version enough to make me know this rewrite would be a worthwhile endeavor.