Dead or Alive (19 page)

Liberation was no longer enough.

Having Violet in his arms had become the real fight.

The only fight.

It was a battle he’d fight to the death.

10

Later that night, Violet blushed when she awoke in her bed with her forehead nestled against Remy’s. The last thing she could remember was falling asleep in his arms under the stars.  This was the second time he’d found the strength to carry her up the stairs to bed. He wasn’t fully healed, and she was sure it must have been a painful task.  Still, she wondered, with relief, if his leg was well enough to carry her sleeping body up the stairs, surely it was well enough for them to leave that house and finish what they’d started.  Finish proving him innocent.

It was what they’d been waiting for, but now the prospect of leaving that house sent her into a mini-panic.  The way he’d been talking to her that night, like they’d already lost, had scared her.  She didn’t want to think about things going south for them.  She didn’t want to think about losing him.  But Remy was right.

They hadn’t won, yet.

What he didn’t seem to understand was that losing was not an option.  It couldn’t be.  She didn’t know how she’d survive it.

Between their bodies, their hands had joined together in their sleep.  At the sight of this, she clutched his a little tighter, and he stirred, but didn’t wake up.  With her free hand, she ran the back of her finger slowly down the bridge of his strong nose, over his plush pink lips.  She yearned for him to open his eyes and give her the gift of those angry baby blues of his.  She almost woke him up in her need for it, but managed to fight it back.  How could anyone with a heart look at a face like this and believe it was capable of anything as terrible as murder?

She found herself getting upset at the mere thought.  She was now more sure than ever that this man wasn’t capable of hurting even a fly. He was too good. He was so good, in fact, that he’d made many attempts to flee from
her
, the one person in the world who was willing to help him, just because he couldn’t stand the thought of her going down for his crime.

Her fingers cupped his sleeping chin, and she thought about the first time he’d carried her up those stairs the night before, and made love to her.  How he’d shake her gently awake in the dead of night, many nights, begging for satiation, for release from his never-ending hunger for more.  How they’d finish together, shower together, and have each other again.  If his sheer stamina was any indication, he would be ready to leave this house and get back to the investigation very soon.

The though scared her to death.  Once Remy’s leg was well, he would have no problem getting rid of her if he wanted to.

Did he?

He’d told her, many times, that he was never looking for anything serious with the women in his life.  He’d even said that women who dated him had a knack for seeing something in him that wasn’t really there.  When Violet looked at him now, she saw a man she loved and who loved her back.  Even if he’d never said it.

Had she filled her own head with dreams that didn’t exist?  Remy had been in tears that night, there was nothing fake about that, but he still hadn’t said the words. Perhaps the tears weren’t indicative of his love for her, but for the fear he felt inside.

He was a man with much to be afraid of. So much so that it would be enough to drive anyone to tears.

Her hand fell from his chin.  Was she doomed to be just another name on the list of women whose heart Remy had ripped clear out? He hadn’t, after all, said that he loved her back.  Violet jammed her eyes shut, attempting to calm her thoughts and regain some sense of control over how distressed they made her, but she couldn’t.

Why hadn’t he?  With every second that passed, every second she laid there even looking at him, it was bothering her more and more. She hated the idea of being something casual to him, but feared she’d set herself up for just that.

With a heavy sigh, she climbed out of bed and made her way to the bathroom.  Taking in her sleepy reflection in the mirror, she immediately scoffed at how happy she looked.  Even with the weight of the world on her shoulders, with doubt plaguing her mind, she looked deliriously happy.

What an idiot.  Only she could fall in love with a man who wasn’t looking for love.  She was nothing if not a masochist.

She moved to the toilet, and with a little more force than what was necessary, yanked the heavy lid up.  The burner phone that she’d swiped off of the young boy was, thankfully, still intact where she’d taped it to the top.

Snatching it down, she immediately dialed Miles’ number, turning her back to the door as she spoke.

“Hey, Miles. Did you find anything?”

Miles sighed.

“As much as I love the sound of you sighing heavily to show your complete disapproval of my life and my choices, I don’t have any time, Miles.  I’m completely out of minutes.”

“I have phone numbers and addresses for all of the crew members, including Meredith.  I also managed to get my hands on the footage from that night.  It shows Remy going into Meredith’s hotel room.”

Violet’s heart immediately fell.  “That’s not possible.”

Another deep sigh.  “It’s him, Violet.  I’m sorry.  He’s still wearing his uniform and everything.”

“It has to be a pilot from another airline who looks exactly like him.  The profession isn’t exactly short on blonde haired, blue eyed, Caucasian men, is it?  Whose to say it isn’t the other pilot who was working the trip?”

“Because I looked into the other pilot.  Not only is he brunette, unlike the
blonde
man in the footage, but there are photos of him and the other crew members at a restaurant near the hotel, date stamped during the same time that Remy was videoed going into Meredith’s room.  Violet, I’m sorry, but he’s guilty.”

“Guilty.” She nodded. “Okay, he’s guilty.”

Sensing irony, Miles gave her a taste of her own medicine.  “Yep. He is.  He’s also guilty of kidnapping, grand theft and breaking and entering.  But I’m sure you’re already well aware of those last three.”  Miles’ voice rang with impatience.  “Come home.”

“I guess my gut is completely wrong on this one…” She paused for effect.  “That’s what you’re saying right?  You. The one person who’s always told me to trust my gut… the one person that’s always told me my gut is never wrong.  You’ve always told me that, Miles.”  Tears came to her eyes.

“Violet, the state that you’re in right now?  It’s called denial.  Will you please come home? There’s a lot of money being spent trying to find you.  People are making themselves
sick,
Violet, trying to find you.”

Violet’s breathing hitched.  “Is someone there with you?”

The silence on his end went on a moment too long before he finally responded, “No…”

She ended the call just as a tear fell down her cheek.  She couldn’t take the words that Miles was saying to her, couldn’t face the idea that she could possibly be wrong about all of this.  Her mind raced.

Sure, she and Remy had gathered a lot of evidence that didn’t make sense, more than a few inconsistencies on the prosecution’s end of his case… but they hadn’t found anything
unquestionably concrete,
and beyond the shadow of a doubt.  At most, they’d found enough information to declare a mistrial, and even that didn’t guarantee Remy was actually innocent. She cursed Miles, hating that he was causing her to second guess herself.

***

Remy awoke with a heaving breath, his hands swimming across the sheets in search for Violet’s warm, supple body.  When he saw that she wasn’t there, he immediately climbed out of bed, needing the warm feel of her in his arms, to get back inside of her again.  He needed in.  Physically, emotionally, mentally, in any way she would allow.

He could distantly hear the sound of her voice in the master bathroom, and grinned as he pushed the door open, immediately appreciating the sight of her with her back to the door, completely naked.  His body responded instantly, but right on it’s tail, his heart was falling. She was whispering into a cellphone.

He froze in the doorway.

When had she gotten her hands on a cellphone? They’d both agreed early on that, outside of television, technology of any kind was a mistake at this point, not worth the risk. Now here she was, with a cell phone?  Where had she gotten it?  Why had she kept it from him? An unease raced through him that left him breathless, and tightened his heart. It was a feeling he’d never experienced at her hand, and it shook him. If he thought that stung, her next words nearly killed him.

“Guilty.  He’s guilty.”

For the first time, he realized that Violet was the only thing in the world that had been keeping him alive for all these weeks.  At the sound of those words in her mouth, nothing else mattered to him. Three words in two short seconds had completely ended him.  The sensation of being ripped in two was immediate, and paralyzing.  The one world that had grown to matter came crashing down all around him.

“I guess my gut is completely wrong on this one…”

Remy immediately stepped out of the bathroom, unable to hear another word.  He made his way back to the bed with wide eyes, plopping down on the mattress and trying to wrestle with the feeling of his body coming completely apart on the inside.  He gasped in each breath, alarmed that he seemed to have forgotten how to accomplish the simple action of inhaling.

“He’s guilty.”

“I guess I was wrong about him all along.”

His eyes raced with tears.  For this entire ordeal, he’d managed to bite them back.  Up until that night under the stars, he’d maintained some semblance of control.  Those days were done.

She owned him.

And he couldn’t break free.

The pain rippled through him ruthlessly, and he was a slave to it.  Hating it’s power over him, and completely unable to make it stop.

“Fuck,” he whispered, his eyes shooting to the bathroom door when Violet suddenly stepped out.

She flinched in surprise at the sight of him, then her face collapsed into a glorious smile.  “Hey.” She grinned.  “I’m sorry if I woke you…”

Remy’s lips hardened.  “You didn’t.”

She began making her way over to him. “To be honest… I’m glad you’re awake,” she said, wrapping her arms around his neck and crawling onto his lap, her naked body curling perfectly against him in all the right ways.

Remy’s eyebrows knitted together, damning his cock as it went instantly hard, betraying his wounded heart and hectic mind.  When she pressed a kiss to his lips, he fought back the overwhelming urge to deepen it, reminding himself of what he’d just heard.  If she thought he was a guilty man, why was she still so willing to climb all over him, and kiss him the way she was now?

Maybe she still planned on using him for her career-making story. He could already see the tagline in his mind:
My Month with a Murderer
.  Remy’s eyes grew moist as she kissed him, wondering when he’d lost her, his strongest proponent. He wondered if he’d ever had her at all.

“Already feigning for another roll in the sack with the murderer?” he whispered.

Violet pulled back, and when her eyes met his, they bordered on pained.

“You’re not a murderer.” Her eyebrows knitted together softly.

“Aren’t I?”

His eyes went wide.  The conversation she’d just had with Miles, laced with the look in Remy’s eyes at the moment, the tone of his voice, made her blood run cold. “No.  You aren’t.”

He held her eyes for a long while without responding.  Finally, his gravely voice broke out. “Are you planning on putting our time in the bedroom in your story, too? How you spread your thighs for me every night? How you let me in? How good I am with my tongue? Do you need my statement on what Violet Chambers’ pussy tastes like?”

Pathetically, her eyes filled with tears.  “What are you doing?”

Remy’s eyes froze like ice.  “What are
you
doing?”

Violet climbed off of him, chilled by the look in his eyes and the vacant tone of his voice.    “I don’t give a shit about that story.  That story is the last fucking thing on my mind, Remy.”

He couldn’t even hear her. The blood charging through his veins had collected at his ears, making them pound painfully, blocking them out, almost as quickly as his heart was blocking her out, too. “I guess this is just another Tuesday for you, right? Just another fucking roll in the sack to get what you want?”

“No, actually, it isn’t.”

“Oh no?”

“No.”  She crossed her arms.  “In fact, I make it a point not to fall into bed with any man that I’m not in lo…” She stopped herself from finishing that sentence.  She’d be damned if she said those words to him, again.  Especially not with the way he was acting right now.

“Why don’t we just call this what it really is, Violet?”  Remy knew that his next words were going to be the final nail in their inevitable coffin.  The same coffin that had been lying in wait, open and ready for both of them to fall into from the moment they’d met.  “We had a little fun, but that’s all it was.”

“You have tears in your eyes right now, Remy.  You’re shaking. Why are you doing this?”

Remy looked off into the distance, swallowing hard, refusing to meet her eyes.  “I told you right from the start who I am.  The whole world did, Chambers…”