Dead Run (18 page)

“Not long after you went bounding off like a stag running from a forest fire.” He carefully brushed the hair from Taylor’s bruised forehead. Taylor winced but didn’t object. “What gets into your brain?”

Taylor’s eyelashes flickered a couple of times and lowered. “Hm?”

Will continued to stroke his hair. “I thought we were a team? Why didn’t you wait for me?”

Taylor sighed but didn’t answer.

“Are you falling asleep?”

“A little…” Taylor’s lashes didn’t stir.

Will smiled faintly. “Well, don’t fall asleep until you hear me out.”

Taylor’s eyes opened at that. “It’s okay, Will. Y—”

“Shut up,” Will said gently.

Taylor shut up.

“I don’t know why my brain selected the memories it did, but I can tell you this much: it wasn’t because I don’t care enough about you. I think maybe it’s the other way around.”

“I don’t care enough about you?”

Will sighed. “How hard did you hit your head tonight? No. I mean maybe I care too much about you.”

Taylor’s eyes narrowed. “What’s that mean?”

“Pretty much what I was always afraid of from the start. If I ever let go…” Will had to stop.

Taylor pushed up on his elbow. “I don’t understand.
What
?”

“It’s not complicated,” Will said finally. “If something happens to you, it’s going to happen to both of us. Because I’m not going to survive losing you. You see what I mean?”

Taylor was silent. Finally he eased back to the pillows. “That. Okay. Fair enough. Same here.”

“I have something for you.”

A smiled flickered across Taylor’s lips. “Are you sure in your weakened condition—or my weakened condition—”

“You’ve got a one-track mind.”

“Like you’re not headed the same direction?” But Will had left the bed and was at his dresser, rifling through his undershorts. Taylor sounded rueful. “Maybe you’re not.”

Will found the small blue velvet box and tossed it to the bed.

Taylor caught it one-handed as he sat up. He stared down at the box. His gaze lifted to Will’s. He looked a little pale. “What’s this?”

Will came back to bed and slid in beside him. “Cuff links. What do you think it is?”

“We never…”

“I know. We should have. We sure as hell should have before I left for Paris. I was going to give it to you for your birthday. But we kept… I don’t know. The time wasn’t right. The thing about Iraq threw me.”

Taylor’s gazed as if fascinated at the small box. A muscle moved in his jaw.

“So here’s the thing.” Will cleared his throat. “I didn’t handle this right the first time, and I’m probably not going to handle it right this time. I don’t want you to take the posting in Iraq. Not because I think something bad will happen to you. Because I think something bad will happen to me. I think we’ll have to wait more years to be together, and we’ve waited long enough already.”

“We were at this point once before, you know?” Taylor was smiling, but something in that little twist of lips hurt Will’s heart.

“I know. I wasn’t expecting…Paris. I let my ambition get in the way of us. That was my mistake. But this…” Will nodded at the blue box. “This is my way of trying to show you that nothing has changed for me. It never will. And I’m tired of waiting. Life is too short. So…”

“So?”

“I meant what I said at dinner the other night. I want to resign. I want you to resign.”

Taylor closed his eyes. “Will…”

“No, listen to me. I’ve thought about this. I’ve been thinking about it for a while, to tell the truth. I want us to go into business together. I want us to start our own global security consulting business. We could do it. You know we could. We’re the best at what we do.”

“That’s enough of a reason to give up both our—”

“We could be partners again. Partners in every way.”

Taylor was silent so long Will’s heart grew cold.

Finally Taylor’s lashes lifted. He studied Will gravely. “Are you sure, Brandt? You sure you know what you’re saying?”

“I know what I’m saying.”

Taylor sat up, knees touching Will’s. He handed the box to Will. Will took it back slowly.

Taylor held out his left hand. It was a man’s hand. Nicely shaped, strong, steady. Understanding dawned in Will. He flipped open the lid of the box. The ring glinted brightly. A plain platinum band—platinum mixed with a small percentage of lead from the bullet that had hit Taylor slightly over a year ago. The bullet that might have ended everything—but somehow had meant a new beginning for them.

Smiling a little self-consciously, Will took Taylor’s hand in his.

Loose Id Titles by Josh Lanyon

A Vintage Affair

Don’t Look Back

The Darkling Thrush

The Ghost Wore Yellow Socks

* * *

The A SHOT IN THE DARK Series

This Rough Magic

* * *

The ADRIEN ENGLISH MYSTERIES Series

Fatal Shadows

A Dangerous Thing

The Hell You Say

Death of a Pirate King

The Dark Tide

* * *

The DANGEROUS GROUND Series

Dangerous Ground

Old Poison

Blood Heat

Dead Run

* * *

The DARK HORSE Series

The Dark Horse

The White Knight

* * *

The I SPY Series

I Spy Something Bloody

I Spy Something Wicked

* * *

“Cards on the Table”

Part of the anthology
Partners in Crime

With Sarah Black

Josh Lanyon

A distinct voice in gay fiction, multi-award-winning author Josh Lanyon has been writing gay mystery, adventure, and romance for over a decade. In addition to numerous short stories, novellas, and novels, Josh is the author of the critically acclaimed Adrien English series, including
The Hell You Say
, winner of the 2006 USABookNews awards for GLBT Fiction. Josh is an Eppie Award winner and a three-time Lambda Literary Award finalist.

Find out more about Josh at
http://www.joshlanyon.com