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Authors: Evangeline Anderson

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How had she ever gotten so bold? What had
possessed her to act like this? Tess didn’t know but she liked the feeling she
got—the feeling of power as well as the knowledge that Garron was watching her
do this, was allowing her to take the lead and loving every minute of it.

“Tess…
lin’del,”
he whispered hoarsely as she continued to suck him. “Gods, you’re beautiful
with your mouth wrapped around my cock.
Gods…”

Tess didn’t answer in words, she simply
kept sucking him, twirling her tongue around his thick shaft and taking him as
deeply as she could. Every once in awhile she would pull back and drag the flat
of her tongue across his broad crown, capturing droplets of precum and licking him
as though he was her favorite flavor of ice cream. Through it all, she kept
glancing at his face, watching his reactions, loving the intense pleasure she
saw stamped on his strong features.

At last it seemed he could take it no
more. He was clearly trying not to thrust but she could feel his hips twitching
with the repressed urge—could see the way he bit his lower lip and strove to
hold himself back while she sucked him. This was pure torture for him—it was
time to end it.

“It’s all right,” she murmured, pulling
back. “You can move your hips—I don’t mind.”

“I…wasn’t sure…” His jaws were clenched as
he began to pump into her hand, catching the rhythm of her stroking. “I…oh,
Gods, your little hand is so soft. I’ve never…
Oh…”

“Are you close?” Tess murmured, feeling
more powerful than ever. “Does it feel good, honey? Are you going to come?”

It was pretty mild as dirty talk went but
just saying the words made her feel naughty and sexy and fully alive in a way
she hadn’t been in years. She stroked him up and down, still dipping her head
occasionally to suck or lick him as he pumped up into her fist. The entire
length of his long, hard, muscular body was tight with tension and his face was
a mask of intense need.

“Tess…” he groaned. “Ah, Gods…please…just
like that. Just like that!
Please!”

“It’s okay, honey,” she purred, stroking
him harder—almost milking him now. “It’s okay, just let yourself go and come.”

“Gods, yes!” His hands clenched even
tighter in the quilt until Tess heard it rip and his body arched off the bed as
he responded to her touch. “Gods,
lin’del,”
he moaned. “You’re making me come…you’re making me come so
hard.”

Tess felt him pulse in her palm and then a
thick geyser of creamy white overflowed from the tip of his cock and coated her
hand as she stroked him. Another followed it and then another until she began
to wonder when the last time he’d had an orgasm was. Or did all Kindred just
come a lot? Not that she minded—it was kind of sexy, after all, to know that
she’d affected him so strongly.

At last Garron’s long body went limp on
the bed and he drew in a ragged, gasping breath. Tess released him gently and
looked at his face.

“Are you okay?” she asked, suddenly
feeling uncertain. “Was…was that okay?”

“It was more than ‘okay,’” he rumbled,
giving her a tired little half smile. “It was…I’ve never had such pleasure
before…never dreamed it was possible. Thank you.”

“My pleasure.” She smiled back at him,
feeling relieved. A part of her had been certain he would be angry with her
after this was over—angry at her for doing something so overtly sexual.
But no, it was just therapy,
she
insisted to herself.
And it seems to have
worked—he looks so much better. Way more relaxed.

“No,” he said seriously, looking at her.
“The pleasure was all
mine
. Could
you…would you allow me to return the favor?”

“Um…” Tess felt suddenly nervous again.
“I’m not sure what you mean…”

“Perhaps I could just…hug you to start
with?” he asked softly. “I don’t want to do anything that makes you
uncomfortable, I swear.”

Tess couldn’t help laughing. “Right.
Anything that makes me uncomfortable. After I just finished jerking you off—uh,
I mean, giving you a release.”

His smile grew wider. “That second way you
said it sounds nicer.”

“Yeah, well…” Tess looked down at her extremely
sticky hand. “Maybe before we do anything else we should…you know, clean up
some?”

Garron looked at himself and nodded.

“I think that’s a good idea,” he said
wryly, starting to get up.

“No, no—” Tess pushed him back down with
her non-sticky hand. “Just stay there and relax. I’ll go get a washcloth.”

She ran to the bathroom, washed her hands
and came back with a warm washcloth. She half expected Garron to be asleep and
indeed, the big Kindred was lying there with his eyes closed breathing
peacefully.

Look
at that—all worn out.
Tess couldn’t help
smiling fondly. Now she would clean him up and he would no doubt roll over and
sleep for the rest of the night. At least, that had been Pierce’s usual way
after having an orgasm.

As she watched the deep, even rise and
fall of his broad chest, she wasn’t sure if she was relieved or disappointed.
Garron had talked about wanting to “return the favor.” What exactly had he had
in mind?

Better
not to know,
she told herself
firmly as she got carefully back onto the bed beside him.
You’ve given him what he needed and gone as far as you ought to go.
It’s best to go back to being just friends now—if that was what we were before.

She touched his hip gently, letting him
know she was there so she wouldn’t startle him, and then began stroking the
warm, damp washcloth over his long shaft. Even now, after coming so much and so
hard, he was still semi-erect which was pretty impressive as far as Tess was
concerned.

“Mmmm…” The deep rumble of contentment
that came from him made her smile. “Tess…”

“Shhh,” she murmured. “Just cleaning you
up. Then you can go back to sleep.”

But to her surprise, his eyes opened and
he put a hand on her wrist.

“Don’t want to go back to sleep.” His
eyes, as he gazed into hers, were intense.

“What? Aren’t you tired?” Tess felt that
flutter around her heart at the way he looked at her but she tried to keep her
voice light.

“Never tired of being with you.”

Tess became suddenly aware that his shaft
was growing hard again under the warm washcloth.
Oops!
Quickly, she finished up and put it on the nightstand.

“There we go. All done.”

“No, not all done,” Garron insisted. He
put a hand on her arm. “Will you come closer? Will you let me hold you again?
Body-to-body?”

“Umm…” Tess was beginning to feel nervous
again but the look on his face changed to one of pleading.

“Please, Tess. I just want to hold you. I
won’t do anything you don’t want.”

“Well…” She felt herself melting under the
force of those lovely turquoise eyes. “All right.”

She snuggled against his side again and
Garron sighed contentedly and pulled her close, wrapping her in his arms. He
seemed much more relaxed and comfortable now but also a lot more alert than she
would have thought.

“You’re so beautiful,” he murmured,
nuzzling his face into her hair. “And so giving.”

“I just…wanted to make you feel good. Uh,
to feel
better
, I mean,” she said
hastily. “Did it help? Is your other—your
dr’gin—
under
control?”

“For now,” he murmured. “I don’t know why but
having your hands on me in that way seems to really help.”

In a
sexual way, he means,
whispered the little
voice in her head. Tess cleared her throat.

“Um, well I’m glad it worked. And glad you
feel good—
better.”

“I’d like to make you feel good, too, you
know,” he said softly. His big hand trailed down her arm until it rested on her
hip. His long fingers curled around her, radiating forbidden heat, making her
feel small…helpless.

“Um, that’s really nice of you.” Tess
looked down. She could feel herself getting hot…which scared her to death. “But
I’m good. Honestly, just fine.”

He turned toward her and cupped her jaw,
tilting her chin up so that their eyes met.

“What is it,
lin’del?”
he murmured softly. “Do you still fear me?”

“No, of course not,” Tess said at once.
“It’s just…”

She paused, trying to think how to explain
that it wasn’t him she feared at all—it was her own reaction to him. When she
had been the one touching him, the one in control, she had felt free, open…safe.
But allowing herself to be touched—and to take any kind of sexual pleasure in
it—was different and much more difficult. She had gotten around it the night
before by telling herself he was just “healing” her. Just as she had convinced
herself that touching him just now was a form of “therapy.” But to put all
these excuses and ruses aside and simply allow him to touch her body in order
to bring her pleasure…it was a much more difficult thing than it sounded. Maybe
impossible.

But how could she tell Garron all that?

It was a big, tangled, snarly mess inside
her—a rat’s nest of fears and phobias and desires locked away and hidden so
deep Tess didn’t know if she could ever find the key.
I’m a hot mess—there’s no way I can ask him to deal with all my issues.
No way he’d want to.

“Just what?” he asked softly and she
realized she’d been thinking too long.

“It’s just…complicated.” She sighed.
“Look, I’m sorry, Garron but I’m really tired right now and it’s late. Look…”
She gestured at the window. “It’s full dark outside and we were driving most of
today. Do you mind if we call it a night?”

“Of course.” He shifted against her. “Can
we sleep like this? I like the feel of you against me.”

Tess smiled. Sleeping should be safe
enough—as long as that was all they did.

“Sure, I like it too. It’s nice.”

“Good.” He sighed and dropped a gentle
kiss on her forehead. “Sleep well, Tess.”

“You too,” she murmured, daring to snuggle
a little closer. It really
was
nice,
being this close to him. His big, hard body was comforting and his arms around
her made her feel safe and cared for. His scent seemed to relax her and his
deep, even breathing acted almost like a lullaby.

Slowly she drifted to sleep…

Only to wake up a few hours later
screaming and crying.

Chapter
Twenty-four

 

“It’s
not mine, is it, you little slut? Whose is it? Who’s the lucky guy who knocked
up my wife? Was it Barney, that fucking security guard who works at the nursing
home with you?”

“Please,
Pierce…”
She was cowering against the wall, trying
to avoid his blows.
“Be reasonable—Barney
is almost seventy! Besides, I would never,
never
do that with anyone else. I don’t even
look
at other men. Please!”

“Lying
little whore! If you don’t look at other guys, how did you get pregnant?”
He glared at her, his eyes poison green slits, his face
screwed up in a mask of fury.
“Huh? Tell
me that?”

Tess knew she ought to try harder to
placate him. What had started out as a few slaps and shoves was going to turn
into full on punching soon and she would be on the receiving end of it. But as
it did, sometimes, her anger got the better of her common sense.

“How
do you
think
I got pregnant? You
flushed my birth control pills because you said you wanted to start a family.
Well, guess what Pierce—this is it.”
She
pointed at her lower belly, rounder now than usual, since she was finally
beginning to show.
This is your
family—your baby—all yours and no one else’s! And you
know
it. You’re only pretending otherwise just to give you an
excuse to hit me—like you ever
need
an excuse.”

Pierce’s face got even uglier.

“You
little slut! I know that brat inside you isn’t mine. I know you’ve been fucking
around on me! You always do—that’s why I have to punish you all the time.”

“How
could I?”
Tess demanded.
“You know what I do all day—I get up, make
your breakfast, go to work where I’m surrounded by female nurses and patients
in their eighties and nineties, then I come straight home and make you supper
and I’m in for the night. That’s it—that’s all. That’s my whole entire day.”

He scowled.
“You’re fucking around on your lunch hour.”

“How
could I? You’ve been dropping me off and picking me up for months now,”
Tess pointed out.
“Even
if I wanted to cheat—which I don’t—there’re no men at work who are anywhere
close to my age. There’s just no way, Pierce. You can twist it all you want but
there’s no way this is anyone’s baby but yours.”

“Is
that so?”
He stood there
breathing angrily, puffing through his flared nostrils like a bull, the way he
always did when he was working himself into a rage. But at least he’d stopped
hitting and slapping her, which was a big improvement.

“Yes,
that’s so.”
Tess felt a cautious
sense of relief. She had him dead to rights on this argument. He couldn’t
“punish” her for something she couldn’t possibly have done. She dared to get
out of her protective crouch and stand straight against the wall.
“It’s yours,”
she said softly, pointing
to her lower belly.
“He or she is your
baby, Pierce. Yours. And mine.
Ours.”
She tried to smile at him, hoping she could make him see.
“Can you imagine holding him or her? Picking a name? Decorating the
nursery? Can you—?”

“No.”
His fist came flying so fast it was just a blur. She
didn’t have time to shield herself—barely even had time to react. Still, she
tried to cover her head instinctively, tried to shield her face from his fist.

But it wasn’t her face he was aiming
for—not this time.

She felt the sickening blow like a sledge
hammer to her lower belly. This was no simple slap or even a light punch—Pierce
had put all his weight behind it. It knocked the wind out of her and she
crumpled to her knees, clutching her belly, frantic with pain and fear.

Even before she caught her breath, she
knew that something inside her had gone terribly, horribly wrong. The fragile
spot in the center of her pelvis felt boneless and heavy at the same time.
Somehow she knew that the spark that had been kindled inside her had gone out.
Had been smashed out by the fist of the one who had put it there in the first
place.

“Oh,
no,”
she whispered, curling in on herself in a
protective ball. She cradled her wounded belly in her arms, holding herself as
though she could hold the little one who had been so briefly within her.
“No…
no…”

And then the cramps started, the ripping
pain and the knowledge that it was over, all over. The fragile little life was
gone…

 

* * * * *

 

“It’s gone…
gone.”
Tess curled in on herself, clutching her belly as tears
rolled down her cheeks. Grief pierced her, ripping at her with claws sharper
than the cramps that had torn her apart. Loss filled her, darker than the blood
that had spilled from between her thighs. “Oh, please,” she moaned softly,
unable to stifle her sobs. “Oh, please…no. No…”

“Tess?” Suddenly a huge, male form was
looming over her in the darkness. “Tess, what’s wrong?”

The words themselves didn’t register—only
the masculine tone and the big body crowding her…
threatening her.

“No, leave me alone!” Tess scrambled to
the end of the bed and huddled against the footboard. “Stay away—haven’t you
done enough? I lost it—
I lost it!

“Lost what? Tess, please…” He came toward
her again, one hand outstretched. “It’s me—just me,” he said.

Tess shrank from his touch.

“It’s gone—are you happy now? You took
care of that.
Gone.

“What’s gone? Tess please—look at me. Look
at my eyes—it’s me—Garron.”

Something about what he said slowly began
to register. His eyes…why could she see his eyes in the dark?

Because
they’re glowing,
whispered a little
voice in her head.
And they’re not
green—they’re blue. Turquoise.

“I…” Tess didn’t know what to say. She swiped
tears from her eyes with the back of her hand.

“It’s me,” he said again and then he was
enfolding her in his arms.

For a moment Tess stiffened against him.
He was so big…so impossibly strong. She could feel the power in those massive
arms—he could rip her in two if he wanted. As easily as ripping apart a doll or
a stuffed animal.

She started to pull back but he pressed
her face gently to his throat.

“Breathe me in,” he murmured, stroking her
back with long, soothing strokes. “Breathe my scent,
lin’del.
It’s me. Just me.”

Tess did as he said, gulping in one deep,
shaky breath after another. His scent—it wasn’t the too-sweet, cloying
aftershave that Pierce always used. It was a warm, dark spice that smelled like
safety…that smelled like home, although she didn’t know why.

Her body registered the fact that she was
safe before her mind did. Even before she made a conscious decision to do so,
she felt herself sag against his broad chest as her body went boneless and she
finally relaxed.

“It’s all right,” Garron rumbled, stroking
her hair and back. “Everything is all right. You just had a bad dream.”

“Yes. I…should have warned you I have them
from time to time.” She drew away from him a little and swiped at her eyes
again. “I’m sorry if I freaked you out. That’s…not the most pleasant way to
wake up, I know.”

“It doesn’t sound like whatever happened
in the dream was pleasant either.”

“Well, that’s why they call them
nightmares, right?” Tess tried to laugh but it came out as more of a sob.

She’d had bad dreams about Pierce ever
since she left him. Sometimes he was chasing her and she tried to run but her
feet kept getting stuck to the floor. Sometimes he was screaming in her face
while she was tied to the bed and she couldn’t shield herself from his angry
blows. But this one—this half dream/half memory—was the worst. The one she
dreaded the most. Why did it have to be the dream she had the first night she
slept in Garron’s arms? Not that they were more than friends or anything but
still…The big Kindred probably thought she was crazy now.

“I’m sorry,” she said again, trying to
sniff back the tears. “I just…it was a bad one. I should…I think I’ll go sleep
on the couch. That way if it comes back I won’t wake you up again.”

“No. Absolutely not.” He took her by the
shoulders and looked into her eyes, his face filled with concern in the dim
room. “You’re going to stay here with me and tell me about the dream.”

“What? No!” Tess shook her head. “It was
nothing—silly. Really, let’s just forget it.”

He frowned.

“My people believe that dreams hold
significance—either for the past or the future. This isn’t something to just
shrug off, Tess. You need to tell me about it—make me understand so I can help
you if it comes back again.”

“Why should you want to help? Why do you
care?” she demanded. Planting both palms on his broad chest, she pushed him
away, reclaiming her space. “You made a vow to honor your deceased fiancé,
remember? And I’m on the run from my psychopath ex. We’ve both got too much
baggage to get involved so why bother?”

“Because we’re
already
involved,” he said in a low voice. “At least, I am. I do
not know about you.”

Tess bit her lip, her anger suddenly
dying.

“What do you mean?”

“Tess…
lin’del…”
He took a deep breath. “I have been trying to honor my vow—trying to remember
Nella and everything she meant to me for so long that…” He sighed. “Well, I
think I lost sight of the present and the future by always looking to the past.
She was beautiful and I loved her with all that was in me. But…she is gone.
Gone, never to return.”

“I’m sorry,” Tess said, feeling bad.
“Sorry for your loss.”

“So am I.
But I cannot live in the past forever. You…Tess, you’re here with me
now
. You’re warm and curvy and
beautiful…” His hands described an hourglass in the air. “So damn beautiful it
makes me ache to look at you.”

“Oh…” Tess whispered. “I…thank you.”

“I’m only speaking the truth of my heart.”
He put a fist to his chest. “I hope it doesn’t frighten or distress you.”

“No, I just…don’t know exactly where
you’re going with it,” she said.

“I don’t either.” He spread his hands. “I
only know that I want to be with you—to protect you, to shelter you, to hold
you. So please…” His deep voice dropped to a gentle tone. “Would you tell me
about your dream?”

“I…” Tess sighed. “All right, I will. But
you may wish you hadn’t asked. I wasn’t kidding when I said I had a lot of
baggage.”

“I’m listening,” he said simply. He went
up to the head of the bed, propped a pillow against the antler headboard and
leaned back against it. After a moment’s hesitation, Tess followed him.

“I don’t suppose Di told you what finally
made me leave Pierce for good?” she asked.

He shook his head. “She said it wasn’t her
story to tell.”

“Okay, right. That sounds like Di.”

“Is that what the dream is about? The
reason you left?”

Tess nodded. “Yes, and it’s not pretty.
God, how can I say this?”

“Just say it,” he murmured. “Just tell me,
Tess.”

“All right, fine. You asked for it.” She
took a deep breath. “About six months before I left him, Pierce got it into his
head that he wanted to start a family…”

 

* * * * *

Garron listened quietly as she spoke,
taking in every word, watching her lovely face for signs of tears. There were
none at first—Tess spoke in a clipped, mechanical voice, sounding like the robotic
being she had been pretending to be when he first met her at the Pairing House.
It was as if she was trying not to feel, trying not to let the past reach out
and swallow her whole as she told him her story. Having suffered abuse growing
up, Garron completely understood.

“So Pierce wanted a family,” she said,
looking down at her hands. “I don’t know why. Maybe he thought a baby would tie
me down more—like I could be any more tied down than I was.” She gave a dry,
unhappy laugh that hurt Garron’s heart to hear. “I had no say in the matter, of
course. Pierce made all the major decisions—even the ones that had to do with
me.
Especially
the ones that had to
do with me.”

She paused for a moment and he wondered if
he should say something. But it seemed she was just gathering her thoughts—or
maybe gathering her courage to tell him more. Instead of speaking, he reached
for her hand. Tess looked at him briefly and he was afraid she might pull away.
He was ready to let her go if she wanted him to—after everything she had been
through he would never hold her against her will. But to his relief, she only
froze for a moment…then slowly entwined her fingers with his. Then she went on.

“Anyway, he took my birth control
pills—medicine that keeps you from getting pregnant—and flushed them down the
toilet. He made me watch,” she said in that same, mechanical voice. “Then he
fucked me.”

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