Diamonds Are Truly Forever: An Agent Ex Novel 2 (9 page)

“Oh, boy, now that sounds spontaneous and believable. Could you make it a little more stiff and stilted? A little more monotone, maybe?” He shook his head and frowned, obviously exasperated. “You’re just going to spring it on her like that? No prep work? No ground softening first?”

“The straightforward truth is always best. Isn’t it enough that I have to lie? Now you want me to tell her a story, too?” She scowled at him.

“Yeah, that’s what I’m saying. Feed her first if you have to. Get her nice and full, drowsy and relaxed. Then hit her with the news.” He punched the air for emphasis. “Everyone loves story time after lunch. We’ve been programmed for it since kindergarten.

“And a little pause or two would add authenticity. But only if you want to actually convince her. I’d hate to think you’re sabotaging the mission already.”

Already?
She raised a brow and continued scowling. Now he was just being sarcastic and trying to rile her up. “I wouldn’t dare.” Staci crossed her arms. “You told me once liars talk too much, give too many details. I’m only trying to stick to the script.”

“Okay, misinterpret me. That’s not going to help us.” He took a deep breath.

Staci could tell the strain of trying to be patient was wearing on him. Drew had never been a patient man. Nor was he cut out to be a teacher.

“Stace, you have to read the situation. In this case, telling the ‘truth’ of us reuniting is going to be more difficult than lying.” He gave her a deadpan look. “At least for most people. So telling her we’re back together is going to look a lot like ineffective lying. You
want
to appear hesitant and guilty. In this case, lying plays to your strengths.”

Her strengths, right. “Okay, what would
you
say, big shot?”

“First, I’d use your natural hesitancy and pauses to add authenticity. Something like this isn’t easy to blurt out. You know Linda’s not going to necessarily jump for joy at this news. I’m sure you’ve painted me as an ass since the breakup.”

“I have not!”

He raised a brow. “Now you’re just insulting me with your barefaced lies.”

He has me there.
She felt her face flush.

He laughed at her obvious discomfort. “You jumped in too quickly and vehemently with that one. Next time, tone it down a little.”

“Too hesitant, too quick,” she said. “Seems a girl can’t win around here.”

He grinned. “A girl can win. If she reads the situation, watches body language, and pays attention to her coach.”

He got back to business. “Now I’m you. For simplicity, I’m also your mom.” He put down his beer, sat up straight, and crossed his legs in an effeminate manner, playing with his hands in his lap.

“Now you’re just making fun,” Staci said. “I don’t sit like that.”

He shot her a quick look that said she did, then jumped back into character and looked down at his lap, stealing glances at her with a nervous look in his eye. “Mom, I have something to tell you.” Heavy pause. “Drew’s back in town.”

“Drew’s back? Oh, sweetie, I’m sorry!” He still didn’t sound like her mom, but he had some of her intonation down. “How are you handling it? Has that beast been bothering you?”

Staci snorted and interrupted. “Mom doesn’t call you a beast.”

He looked up at her from beneath his lids, appearing decidedly unconvinced. And well he shouldn’t have been. Linda didn’t call him a beast. She called him something far worse.

“Hey! I’m in the middle of an instructive performance here.”

“Sorry.” Staci wasn’t sorry, and it probably showed.

He bit his lip as she often did.

“Now that’s just a parody.”

He stayed in character, ignoring her as he hesitated and stared into his lap again. “He stopped by the house to pick up a few of his things yesterday.” He glanced up and looked her in the eye. Speaking in a rush he blurted out, “Oh, Mom, seeing him again, I realized, we both realized, we’d made a big mistake.”

He paused, looking at her as if he were pleading with her. “I love him. I always have. I can’t live without him.” He lowered his voice to a near whisper. “We’re back together. I’ve moved into his condo. The divorce is off.”

The big-mistake part rattled her. He sounded so believable, he nearly convinced her, damn him. However, her mom was a tougher bird than she was.

Drew grinned at her. “See how I used the pauses to make the story ring true?”

Staci frowned. “Yeah, you’re a great actor. Must have been all those classes you took.”

He ignored her jibe. “You try.”

She shook her head. “No way.” She crossed her arms. “I don’t need practice. I’ve got it. Too much practice and the whole thing will come out sounding stiff and rehearsed.”

She had no intention of looking him in the eye and telling him she was still in love with him, even if he was supposed to be her mother.

He persisted. “Fair enough. No pretending you’re talking to Linda. Just look me in the eye and tell me you love me. If you can convince me of that, you’re ready for tomorrow.”

Her mouth fell open. “Nothing like asking the impossible. I couldn’t convince you of that when we were happily married.”

He didn’t rise to the bait. “Come on. Give it a try.”

“I love you,” she said in her best monotone, knowing she was simply goading him with her lack of effort.

“Uncross your arms, closed body posture is not your friend, and say it like you mean it.” He stared at her intently. “Just once. With feeling.”

She uncrossed her arms and leaned forward to stare into his eyes. He wanted a convincing performance, fine, she’d give him one. So he would finally leave her alone. She knew how stubborn he was.

She scooted forward until their knees touched and took his hands in hers before staring him in the eye, pretending with all her being that this was the first time she’d told him she loved him. “I love you, Fields.” She squeezed his hands.

He pulled his hands free and, before she could move away, cupped her face gently in his hands. “I love you, too, babe.”

His voice was so soft, it nearly broke.

One thing was for sure, the tender look in his eyes was breaking her heart and causing her pulse to race in a way it hadn’t since they first started dating.

He leaned forward.

She remained in place. Or maybe she did lean forward. With the world tilting like it was, it was hard to tell.

His lips met hers. He kissed her gently, exceptionally tenderly, yet probingly. Very much like the first time.

She was too stunned to stop him. Or even remember to break away. She may have even kissed him back!

A second later, he broke the kiss and cleared his throat, looking her in the eye with his inscrutable spy face in place. “See,
that’s
what I’m talking about,” he said in the same tone a coach uses with his team during halftime of a big game. “I knew you could do it.”

She gaped at him before remembering to put her game face on and try to be as unreadable as he was. No way would she let him see how much he’d rattled her.

He didn’t wait for her to speak. He jumped up, grabbed the phone, and held it out to her. “I think you’re ready for prime time. Call your mom.”

CHAPTER FIVE

Drew stared into the master bathroom mirror as he got ready for bed, mentally running over the security measures he had in place around the condo. He couldn’t find a single lapse or hole in his logic.

Staci should survive the night.

Even so, he felt apprehensive about her staying in the room next to his. He hoped she didn’t get any smart ideas about sneaking out. He’d already warned her he’d armed the security system. And although he didn’t have disintegrator stairs, he had his share of toys. She wouldn’t get far, nor would an intruder penetrate the condo without his knowing. But she could disrupt his sleep. In truth, she already had. And he hadn’t even been to bed yet.

He shook his head at the bemused reflection of himself in the mirror.
You’ve done it now, buddy.

He shouldn’t have kissed Staci. He knew it before he leaned forward into her lips, but somehow the knowledge hadn’t stopped him. He’d like to claim he was just going with the performance, carrying it out to its logical extreme. But in reality, he knew the truth—he’d wanted to kiss his wife, though his reasons were unclear, even to him.

What had he hoped to find out? Whether she still loved him? Whether the chemistry had disappeared?

Apparently not. His reaction to kissing her was about the same as throwing water on sodium—kaboom! Which only strengthened his determination. He had to complete this mission and get out of Seattle. For good.

He cursed Emmett beneath his breath and remembered the way his boss had meddled with his fellow spy Ty’s marriage during their last mission together in Hawaii. Ty got his wife back and was now a happily married spy. Emmett hated ex-spouses, claiming they were security risks waiting to happen.

The odds of Emmett manipulating a reconciliation here were the equivalent to those of RIOT giving up its plans for world domination—nonexistent. If Emmett thought he was solving another security problem by playing marriage counselor again, he was about to lose his perfect record. Master manipulator that Emmett was, he wasn’t God.

At least NCS didn’t have the same no-ex policy RIOT did—extermination.

Drew was no good for Staci. And Staci was definitely not good for him. They were each other’s worst liability. From now on, he intended to keep his distance. He squeezed a dab of toothpaste onto his toothbrush and began scrubbing his teeth with way more force than the American Dental Association recommended for good gum health.

*   *   *

The guest bathroom in Drew’s condo was well lit and clean, obviously unused since the leasing company had cleaned it and Drew had moved in.

Staci scowled at her sentimental reflection in the mirror.

Why had she let Drew kiss her?

The girl reflected in the mirror looked as if she was going to revert to longing for what was, rather than doing the smart thing and moving on.

Fortunately, that dumb mirror-image girl also looked so chaste and buttoned up and surrounded by layers of cotton, she appeared ready for the convent. It would take a more imaginative man than Drew to find anything sensual about her. The fluffy pink robe Drew hated, topped off with the ugly monkey slippers, would have sent him running, had he seen her.

Beneath the robe, she wore her most comfy, totally unsexy and prim pajamas, the gag gift Mandy had given her when she separated from Drew. Mandy had said a girl deserved a few good nights of sleep in the comfy stuff before going on the prowl and having to give it up in favor of colder, more revealing lingerie.

Staci set her cosmetic bag on the counter just as a flash of movement in the corner by the door caught her eye. She turned around to get a closer look and screamed.

*   *   *

Drew had just stripped down to his boxers and pulled back the covers, ready to slip into bed, when Staci’s ear-piercing scream broke the silence, followed by two thuds in rapid succession.

Shit!

He grabbed his gun from the nightstand and charged into the guest room with his arms cocked in the
ready to fire clear the room
position. The window was closed, the room empty. The adjoining bathroom door stood ajar, light streaming out. But no Staci in sight, not even reflected in the bathroom mirror.

His wife had turned into a vampire. Nothing remained of her reflection, just the sound of her screams echoing off the bathroom walls and another thump as something hit the wall.

He charged in, scanning the area for enemy assassins, bullet holes, hand grenades, or signs of fire, ready to kill Staci’s attacker.

Instead he found Staci cowering in the corner of the tub, screaming. She balanced on the edges as if the tub beneath contained nitroglycerin as she brandished a toilet brush in the air like a weapon.

“What’s wrong? What’s the matter? What is it?” He fired the questions at her without waiting for an answer to any of them, expecting to see a maimed terrorist somewhere on the bathroom floor or in the tub.

“There! Behind the door.” She pointed to the corner behind him.

Drew spun around, ready to shoot whoever hid there. Instead, he saw his guest shampoo bottle cracked with the cap off, bleeding out its pale yellow contents, a bottle of conditioner, and a bruised bar of soap. “You’ve been attacked by body care products? Are you trying to call Mr. Clean with that toilet brush to ward them off?”

Staci screamed again. “No! There, there, there!”

Drew moved in closer, gun still cocked in front of him, trying to still his racing heart. A monster brown house spider cowered stock-still in the spreading shampoo slick between the conditioner and the soap.

“Calm down, Staci. Stop screaming. You’re scaring the poor spider to death. What were you trying to do? Give it a killer shampoo?” He let out a sigh of relief.