Digging Deeper (24 page)

The five of them stood staring at each other.

“What the hell?” Beck said. “Giles, what the fuck was that about?”

“I know what I saw.” Giles’ mouth tightened into a stubborn line. “She’s a flirt. She led him on.”

“What does your father say?” Beck asked.

“I don’t need to speak to him. I know what I saw.”

Beck clenched his fists. “You haven’t even spoken to him? You complete wanker, Giles. You’ve jumped to conclusions and the rest of you followed like sheep.”

“What more proof do I need?” Giles shouted. “You weren’t there. I know what I saw and heard. They were in each other’s arms. He was stroking her head. He kissed her. She kissed him. And you know how Flick launched herself at me the night of the dinner party.”

Beck could see Giles pleading with his eyes for him not to say anything more about the kiss. He’d told Willow Flick had kissed him and asked Beck to back him up.

“I think you’d all better go,” Kirsten said.

“Not before I speak to Flick.” Beck crossed his arms.

“She’s gone,” Josh said. “I heard the front door.”

“Where would she go?” Beck asked. “We should look for her.”

“If she doesn’t want to talk to anyone we’ll never find her,” Kirsten said. “Flick knows this area really well. She’ll come back when she’s ready.”

“Tell her we still have a date for tomorrow night,” Beck said. “Tell her I believe her.”

Giles stared at him with his jaw set. Beck didn’t give a shit.

———

By the time Flick reached the bridge, she could hardly see for her tears. She’d done nothing wrong. Well, she’d flirted, but so had Henry. It was just fun and she never did it in Lady C’s hearing. It would never have gone further than talk. How come no one believed her? She could see why Giles might not and Willow would believe Giles. But not Kirsten and Josh. And Beck.

Flick gulped back a sob. Every time she thought something might happen between them, it went wrong. He’d even volunteered to cook for her. Normally guys expected her to cook, though she only ever had to do it once. She’d worn out two smoke alarms. But maybe he’d still come tomorrow. She’d speak to Henry and get him to talk to Giles. Then they could all apologize. Only why did she doubt that would ever happen?

She sat on the wooden picnic table and looked out across the water. The summer had been hot and the water level was low. There was no settlement submerged here, unlike at Thruscross reservoir further up the Washburn Valley, where West End village had disappeared beneath the water. When Flick was little she’d thought maybe there had been houses under their reservoir, a fairy village no one had known about. She used to stare at the water until she convinced herself she could see lights dancing beneath the surface. Fairies having parties. She’d told her father and it had been their secret. They didn’t tell Stef and that had made the secret even more special, and the pain of betrayal even more heartbreaking when Flick discovered Stef had won a prize at school for her essay about a fairy village lying under the waters of a reservoir near their house.

So was it time to tell Kirsten and Josh about Grinstead’s? Flick had been thinking about it because she knew Henry was right, she couldn’t handle it on her own anymore. She’d tried to bury it deep inside her but it couldn’t stay hidden forever. Josh and Kirsten hurt her tonight when they hadn’t stood up for her. Maybe they wouldn’t believe her when she told them about the money. Flick stared out across the water and watched a bird make a low swoop for insects. She couldn’t tell Beck but he was the one she wanted to tell most of all.

Flick snuck back into the house after Kirsten and Josh had gone to bed. She spotted but ignored the note they’d propped against the kettle. As she passed Kirsten’s room she heard them laughing. Flick gave a quiet sigh. They’d leave and find a place of their own. It made her decision about the house a little easier. Three had become a two and one.

In the morning, she threw her mobile under her bed and left before they woke. She didn’t want to speak to anyone. After she’d finished work at the gym, Flick went straight to Yorkshire TV to do a chauffeuring shift, all the time wondering if Beck would still turn up that night and cook a meal. If Giles had spoken to Henry, he’d know he’d misinterpreted what he’d seen. He’d tell Beck and Beck would be waiting at Timble with a meal, flowers and a smile on his face.

In a parallel world.

On her final trip back to the television center, Flick had to maneuver around an empty police car sitting on the forecourt. She parked and got out to open the back doors of her vehicle for the two Chinese passengers she’d picked up at the airport. As they walked into the building, two policemen came out and headed in her direction. Flick glanced around and then turned back to face them. She’d seen no one behind her and realized with a heart sinking faster than the Titanic that they wanted her.

“Felicity Knyfe?”

She nodded.

“We have a warrant here for your arrest.”

Flick didn’t hear anymore. They carried on talking but it was as though they spoke a foreign language. She saw faces watching through the glass doors of the lobby and closed her eyes to block out their stares.

———

They’d picked her up at 4:00 and when they finally released her it was 10:30. Flick felt empty. They’d asked the same questions over and over and she had few answers. In the end, she’d made a statement and signed it. Flick’s world had collapsed. She needed a hug. She needed her dad. Stef would be no use even if she knew how to reach her. Flick had no one and the pain of that tore at her heart.

She had a long walk back to her car, and as her mind began to click back into gear she remembered Beck had expected her at the house by 7:00. She’d spent the entire day excited that he might turn up and now she hadn’t. Flick groaned and looked for a phone box.

No answer from Beck’s mobile. Eventually it went through to voicemail.

“Sorry,” she mumbled. “I meant to ring. I got—caught up in something. I’m only just on my way home. Maybe you didn’t come to the house. I don’t know. I can explain. Sorry,” she gabbled. “Sorry, sorry, sorry.”

An incoherent message. She should have phoned Timble first to see if he’d actually come. Flick used the other coin to phone Kirsten. The answer machine responded. She couldn’t see the point in rambling again.

By the time she got home it was gone midnight. Everything was clean and tidy but the aroma of curry still lingered. Flick checked the kitchen waste bin and her heart sank. In a way she’d hoped he hadn’t turned up. Now she knew he had. He’d thrown away what he’d cooked. If the food had belonged to Kirsten or Josh they’d have saved it for her. For the first time in her life, Flick wished she was dead.

———

Beck was lying in bed when he heard his mobile beep. He picked it up, listened to the message and threw the phone down. Bit late for apologies. He’d had an unpleasant row last night with Giles when they’d got back from Timble because the prick had continued to insist there was something going on between Flick and his father. But now she’d stood him up, Beck wondered if his trust in her had been misplaced. Couldn’t she face him?

Something else had begun to gnaw at him too. Could Giles be trying to deflect everyone from the fact that he and Flick had fucked each other? Beck thought it quite possible Giles had finished his bloody alphabet game. He’d backed Giles up about the kiss the evening of Celia’s dinner party mostly because he didn’t want to hurt Willow, although he’d decided Flick had been the victim of Giles’ drunken groping. Now Beck wondered if he’d been wrong about that too.

———

When Flick woke the following day, Kirsten and Josh had left for work. Apart from the food in the fridge that wasn’t hers, it was like living alone. Flick felt wretched. She was due at the gym at 4:00 for the late shift so she couldn’t even make it up to Beck by taking him out that night. Maybe he wouldn’t give her the chance. She tried ringing him but it always went to voicemail. She needed to see him only the mere thought of it made her get back into bed and pull the sheet over her face.

A plan to run away from everything, go abroad, get a job in a bar and start afresh surged in and out of her mind. She could grab her passport, pack a bag and walk out—let Stef sort out the house and the debts. Let her sell it, she could keep the money, blow it all in Harvey Nicks. Flick didn’t care. She curled up and pulled the sheet tight around her. Okay, that’s what she’d do. She’d run but first she’d apologize to Beck.

———

Flick saw something different about the dig site when she arrived. An air of purposefulness that hadn’t been evident before. She saw Beck talking to Isobel and hung back until they’d finished. But when she approached, his face hardened and her shoulders tensed.

“What can I say? I’m really sorry about last night.” Flick got the words out as fast as she could.

“So you said.”

His voice sounded cold and dead. He started to walk away. Flick moved to his side.

“Please let me explain.”

He stopped walking, stood in front of her with his hands pushed into his pockets. “Go ahead.”

Flick took a deep breath. She was going to tell him the truth. All of it. She just had to start slowly.

“I’m sorry about last night. These two guys, well they sort of kidnapped me. They took me to a place in Headingley, questioned me for hours and didn’t let me go until ten thirty.” She gave a little smile.

“Is that the best you can do? You couldn’t call? Your mobile get snatched by an alien?”

Flick ignored the warning voices telling her to stop messing around. “I’d left it at home. I wasn’t allowed to use a phone.”

“I’m too busy to listen to lies.” He strode off down the field.

“It was the truth.” She realized whatever had been between them had gone. He believed Giles. No point saying anything else.

Beck made his way over to the area he was excavating. She called that an apology? A stupid joke? What was she thinking? He dropped to his knees and picked up his trowel. Digging was safe. You knew exactly where you were on a dig. Surprises were almost always good ones. Everything was organized and methodical and even if you went down ten feet and didn’t find a thing, there was still a sense of satisfaction for a job well done. He dug out a trowel full of earth.

Women, on the other hand, he couldn’t understand, no matter how hard he tried. Even when he thought he’d done everything right—sent roses or chocolates, he’d find they thought flowers a waste of money or they’d started a diet. If he took them to the opera, they preferred a TV soap, if he suggested a night in, they thought he was cheap. If he trusted them, they let him down. He’d never been stood up before. Never. He tossed a trowel-full of soil further than he’d intended and heard Matt squeal.

Flick walked away with her heart pounding. She went into the field with the marquee and sat on a stack of boards. She’d said she was sorry. Part of her wanted to go home and stick her head in the oven. God knows she had enough reason, but even when he’d turned his back on her, she still wanted him, still felt that flutter inside when he was near. She decided to find him again in an hour and repeat her apology and then the next hour and maybe the one after that, and she’d have to carry on until he forgave her because Flick knew she couldn’t just let him go.

She tried on three more occasions to speak to Beck. The first time a bunch of little children surrounded him. The second time Dina intervened and told her he was busy and couldn’t be disturbed. The third time, Beck looked up and said, “Leave me alone.”

So Flick did.

She retreated to the other field and sat next to the hedge with her eyes full of tears. Had no one spoken to Henry? The whole thing was ridiculous. Maybe she should go to Ilkley and see him. Or would that make things worse?

Flick sat slumped over, her fingers fiddling with something by her side and when she looked down, she saw one of Jared’s marker flags. She realized he must have missed it. This flag was nearer to Beck’s site than any of the others Jared had placed. Maybe there was something down there relating to the dig, something that might make Beck smile at her again. There couldn’t be two singing reindeer. Even she wasn’t that unlucky.

Picking up a sharp stone, Flick scraped out a square around the flag, then began to lever up the grass piece by piece.

———

When Flick returned from her shift at the gym she found Josh and Kirsten waiting.

“You’re avoiding us,” Kirsten said.

“Hungry?” Josh asked.

Flick shook her head. “I ate at work.” She’d eaten nothing substantial for days. Her appetite had disappeared.

“Drink?” Kirsten offered her a glass of wine.

“No thanks.”

“I knew it,” Kirsten said. “You’re ill.”

Flick blinked. “I’m not ill. There’s nothing the matter.” Nothing that could be fixed.

“What happened last night?” Josh asked. “Beck waited for three hours. No phone calls, nothing.”

“I wasn’t even sure he’d turn up after that business about Henry.” She took a deep breath. “I don’t know how you could think I was having an affair with him.”

Kirsten and Josh glanced at each other.

“Giles was so insistent. Anyway, he’s spoken to his father. It’s all sorted now,” Kirsten said.

“We’re sorry,” Josh added.

Kirsten moved toward Flick to give her a hug and because Flick was tired of confrontations, she let it happen, but the hurt remained. Everyone wanted to believe the worst about her, even the two people she thought were her closest friends.

“So what did Beck do for three hours?” Flick asked.

“Cooked you a meal, then threw it away. He went to look for the gas station where you work. Presumably he didn’t find you. So where were you?” Kirsten asked.

Flick still didn’t want to tell them the truth, not exactly.

“I’d driven back to the TV center from the airport. When I came out of the building two guys bundled me into a car and took me to some place in Headingley.”

“You’re kidding?” Josh gasped.

Flick kept her face expressionless. “That’s exactly what happened.”