Divided Hearts (14 page)

“Looks like you wore her out,” Faye said, stepping aside to let them enter.

“She kept nodding off in the car.” Simon set Hannah on her feet inside the vestibule. “I had to sing sea shanties to keep her awake.”

Faye laughed, familiar with the need to occasionally shed one’s sense of decorum in order to mollify a demanding toddler. As she slipped off Hannah’s purple fleece jacket, the little girl looked up at her sleepily, rubbing one eye with her fist.

“Has she had her lunch?”

Simon nodded. “She ate all her crackers and cheese and the entire apple, and not a single French fry was consumed,” he added with a wry smile. “She’ll be out like a light in no time.”

“Would you like some coffee? I just made some,” Faye offered. Yesterday’s conversation with her father had bolstered her confidence; she had to tell Simon how she felt about him, no matter the risk. Maybe today the opportunity would present itself, she thought, with a small shiver of nervous excitement.

He slid off his jacket. “Sure. I’ll get it myself.”

“I see she got acquainted with the whales,” Faye remarked, noting the damp patches on Hannah’s jacket. She hung the small garment over a dining room chair to let it dry. The Vancouver Aquarium boasted spectacular beluga whale and dolphin demonstrations; Faye had seen them many times, but this had been Hannah’s first visit.

“Yes, she absolutely loved it,” Simon called back from the kitchen. “I’ve never seen someone so beyond herself with excitement.”

“We’ll have to take Mommy as soon as she’s better, won’t we,” Faye said, turning to where Hannah had been. All that remained was the stuffed otter, discarded on the carpet. Faye swiveled on her heel, locating the toddler across the living room, each of her small hands clutching an object. Faye paced over to her, bending to see what Hannah was holding, and discovered Simon’s key ring in one chubby fist and a miniature black box in the other.

“Give me those, you little monkey.” Faye pulled the two items out of the little girl’s grasp. Setting the keys on the table, she held onto the box, turning it over curiously. It looked like a box from a jewellery store, covered in black velvet with a rounded lid. “Where did you get this?”

Hannah gazed back at her blankly, reaching again for the keys on the table. Faye was too puzzled by the box to take much notice.

Maybe it was Jenna’s, dropped on the floor and lost under the couch, she thought, as she lifted the hinged lid. Then she gasped.

The dazzling ring inside was nothing you’d forget under a sofa. The band was white gold, set with a sizeable oval diamond that glimmered in the light.

Where in the world …?

Glancing toward the sofa, she saw Simon’s jacket slung over the arm rest, the side pocket gaping open. Then she looked at Simon’s key chain in Hannah’s fist. Her heart lurched.

Simon emerged from the kitchen then, a mug of hot coffee in his hand. “We couldn’t get as close to the dolphin show, but I held her up so she could see over the crowd—”

He closed his mouth abruptly, his gaze fixed on the small black box in Faye’s hand.

Snapping the lid closed, she handed it to him. “Hannah went fishing in your pocket,” she said sheepishly. “Sorry.”

He took it from her, his features taut with apprehension. “I need to talk to you, Faye.”

“Now?”

He nodded toward the toddler now clinging to his leg, jangling his keychain. “Maybe you should put Hannah down for her nap first.”

“Sure. Of course. Be right back.” Scooping Hannah into her arms, she handed Simon the keychain and retrieved the stuffed otter before heading to the bedroom. The little girl was tired enough not to protest as she was put in her crib, clutching the otter in both arms. Faye kissed her and retreated to the hallway, where she stood motionless, the rapid patter of her heart leaving her lightheaded.

At first she felt oddly numb, her hands beginning to tingle as she allowed her mind to work through what she had seen. Of course the ring in the box was an engagement ring. A diamond like that was unmistakable. And Simon looked upset to see that Faye had found it. She’d ruined his surprise.

She rubbed her palms against her cheeks, willing the feeling to return to her skin. Her face blazed with heat. She remembered Simon’s words:
I need you, Faye
. She’d feared his need for her had only to do with Hannah, but she had seen something more in his gaze. And although it had been over a month since he’d held her in his arms, she could not forget the raw passion of his kisses and the tenderness of his caress. With a flush of pure joy she grasped onto the knowledge that his feelings for her hadn’t faded at all. He hadn’t given up on her, even after she’d pushed him away
.
Her father had been right.
Simon Blake wanted to marry her.

Faye spread out her left hand, picturing that stunning diamond sparkling on her slender ring finger. She felt a giddy smile spread across her face. Of course he hadn’t planned on asking her today; he had a more romantic time and place in mind. It was the last thing Faye had expected, but to her surprise, not a single doubt surfaced in her mind. She’d told Simon that being with him didn’t feel right … but all at once nothing felt
more
right than this.

Yes, the future was in her hands, and she intended to take a firm hold on it. Magnificent images flashed through her mind—she and Simon together at his home in Halfmoon Bay, spending long lazy afternoons sailing among the islands; and oh, the evenings … then all at once it occurred to Faye that she’d be Hannah’s step-mother, helping to raise her as she always had. What could be more perfect?

Faye returned to the living room floating on a cloud. “Okay, let’s talk,” she said smoothly, forcing down the wattage of her smile.

Simon motioned for her to sit on the sofa, and she obliged, wishing she’d had time to change into something more becoming than jeans and a T-shirt. A little make-up would have been nice, too, but never mind. She intended to enjoy every second of this without regrets.

Simon joined her on the sofa, pausing to rub his palms on his knees. His nervousness endeared her to him; she wanted to tell him he had nothing to worry about, but remained silent, waiting for him to speak.

“I’ve been thinking a lot about the future, and what I want,” he began, then paused to clear his throat. Unprepared, he obviously hadn’t had a chance to plan his words as carefully as he’d wanted to. “The number one thing that comes to mind is that I need to provide a stable home for Hannah. I’ve always run away from commitment before, and I think it’s time I stopped running. I have the responsibility of a child now, so it seems like the right time to settle down.”

Faye breathed deeply, in and out, attempting to calm her battering heart. “I’m so sorry I found the ring,” she said. But where was it? She noticed with mild surprise that he no longer held it in his hand.

“It’s all right,” Simon said. “I’ve been putting off talking to you about it, and Hannah’s just given me the push I needed.” He met Faye’s gaze, drawing a deep breath of his own before continuing. “You see, I think the best thing I can do for Hannah is to marry her mother.”

Chapter Eleven

But I’m not Hannah’s mother,
was the first thought that came to Faye. She ran his words through her head several times.
Marry Hannah’s mother. Marry
… Jenna.

She glared at Simon, puzzled. “You don’t mean that.”

“I do.”

Faye let out a sharp breath, feeling her body begin to tremble. A muddle of emotions swept through her in such a flurry that she wasn’t sure which of them to latch onto. Within the crushing disappointment lay bewilderment and a deep sense of loss, alongside anger at Simon’s thickheaded intention. “That’s absurd. You don’t need to
marry
Jenna. You’re already working out a custody arrangement.”

“I know,” he said. “But it would be best for Hannah, wouldn’t it, if she lived with both of her parents?”

Faye slouched back against the sofa cushion, lightheaded, her heart thundering and her face scorched. A feeling of profound foolishness joined the other emotions churning inside her. For a few minutes she’d felt utterly blissful, certain she was to become Simon’s wife. But he hadn’t intended to marry her at all.

“That’s ideal, yes,” she said, steering her focus back to his question. “But not if the parents don’t love each other. You’d end up divorced and in a worse situation.”

My God, did he love Jenna?
It wasn’t as though Faye hadn’t considered the possibility, but she’d dismissed it. Surely she would have picked up some clue from Jenna had her relationship with Simon blossomed into something more than parental cooperation.

Simon leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees. “I understand what you’re saying. But I’ve given it a great deal of consideration and I think we could be a happy family. I’m still a little angry at Jenna, I’ll admit, but that will fade in time.” He held Faye’s gaze, his brilliant blue eyes pleading for understanding. “I don’t want to see my daughter only on weekends. I want to be there to help her with her homework, and tuck her in bed at night. I want to be a full-time father, and if that means making compromises and sacrifices, it’ll be worth it.”

So he didn’t love Jenna. A mingling of relief and fresh anguish swept through Faye. Sacrifices, indeed. Whether or not he loved her friend made no difference to Faye’s prospects; it only made the situation more unfair, and all the more untenable.

Then again, just because he meant to ask Jenna to marry him didn’t mean she’d accept.

“Do you really think Jenna would agree to this?” Faye asked.

Simon’s shoulders lifted. “I don’t know. I can only try.”

She let out a sharp breath of exasperation, grappling for alternative solutions. “Why couldn’t you just live together? I mean, platonically. Then you’d both have Hannah full-time.”

He shook his head. “I considered that. But if we wanted to date other people, it would get too complicated, and it would only confuse Hannah. Married, we’ll be a proper family.”

“When are you planning on asking her?” Faye glanced down at her bare finger, rubbing it absently with her thumb. She couldn’t help picturing Simon sliding the ring onto Jenna’s finger, and the image brought a terrible ache to her chest. Tears threatened behind her eyes, but she blinked them back.

“Probably tomorrow,” he said.

“Go on, then.” Faye looked at him with hardened eyes, her voice cold as sudden anger surged through her. “If it’s what you really want.”

“Please understand, Faye.” Inching closer, Simon grasped her hand. “What’s best for Hannah is more important to me than my own desires. But if you don’t want me to propose to Jenna, tell me now, and I won’t do it.” His free hand rose to stroke her face, the backs of his fingers lightly tracing the curve of her cheek.

Faye closed he eyes briefly, allowing the sweet sensation of his touch to shimmer through her, electrifying her body. Her face burned, both with yearning and with anger. She wanted this man with all her heart, and he had wanted her, too; he’d tried to persuade her to think of her own desires, yet here he was now, ready to forfeit his.

I love you, damn it, and you must know it; but
don’t make me responsible for your decisions,
she told him silently, unable to bring the words to her lips. It would be wrong to try to stop him; after all, he was doing the very thing her parents hadn’t been willing to do—put his child’s needs ahead of his own.

“Go ahead,” she replied stoically instead. “Ask her to marry you. I won’t stop you.”

* * *

She found Jenna in her wheelchair, parked by the window of her hospital room. She turned to look at Faye, her eyes shining, as though holding some delicious secret. It didn’t take long for the words to spill out.

“You won’t believe it.” Jenna’s voice sounded both incredulous and tinged with pleasure. “Simon proposed.”

“What did you tell him?” Faye tried to sound surprised, while her heart sank to the pit of her stomach like a stone.

“I didn’t know what to say.” Jenna shrugged one shoulder. “I was floored. I tried to brush it off, but he was so persistent, talking about how it was the best thing for Hannah. Finally I told him I’d think about it.”

Other than requiring the wheelchair, Jenna looked like her old self, her skin clear and pink, her gray eyes lively. Slim since she was a girl, she looked a bit too thin now, but appeared more robust each time Faye saw her. Even her impish smile was back, on full display now that she was relishing her very first proposal of marriage.

Faye sank onto the bed, feeling a need for support as she posed her next question. “Do you
want
to marry him?”

Jenna replied with another quick shrug. “It wouldn’t be so bad. He’s gorgeous and rich. A girl could do worse.”

Faye nodded vaguely, both surprised and irritated by her friend’s cavalier attitude toward an offer that Faye would have given her eye teeth to receive. “But you’re not in love.”

“Love comes and goes,” Jenna said, as though love as a necessary element in a marriage were an antiquated notion. “We’re good friends now, and that’s a start.”