Dory's Avengers (37 page)

It was dark before Theo and Cathie finally left Theo's room, realising that Cathie's parents were probably beside themselves with worry. Having said all that needed to be said, they had lain in the darkening room for a long time afterwards without speaking a word. Cathie continued to stroke Theo's back as she held him close, kissing him with increasing passion and enjoying the feel of his hardness pressing against her thigh.

‘Cathie…?' he began eventually.

‘The answer's yes,' she replied, starting to undo his jeans.

When Theo and Cathie finally did emerge from the bedroom, still basking in the afterglow of having made love for the first time, they were shocked back from their reverie when Lord William's voice sounded from the shadows.

‘I hope he hasn't worn you out, Catherine,' said His Lordship, gratified to see Theo start with surprise as much as the timid girl on his arm. With typical self-control, Theo recovered almost instantaneously, even though his insides were churning with fear.

‘Your Lordship,' he said with an admirable attempt to sound casual. ‘How long have you been there?'

‘Long enough,' replied Lord William merrily. ‘You certainly have some stamina, Theodore!'

Gradually Cathie and Theo relaxed, realising from his demeanour that Lord William thought they'd been making
love all afternoon. Doing his best to look nonchalant, Theo said, ‘Yes well, I've waited long enough, Your Lordship. Thought we'd make the most of it, eh Cathie?'

Catherine just giggled nervously and looked at Theo with huge eyes.

‘Cathie needs to ring her father, Your Lordship.'

‘Of course, Catherine. You can use the phone in my office. Your father must think we've kidnapped you! Don't worry, young lady; Theodore can accompany you to the phone. I can see you're not ready to let go of his hand quite yet.'

A couple of days after Catherine had spent the afternoon in Theo's room, Lord William found all three of his children in the family room. As usual, Theo and Marina were curled up on the floor watching cartoons, while Rosanna sat apart reading a book. Lord William sat down on the sofa for a while before deciding it was maybe time for a father-and-son chat.

‘Theodore,' he said, ‘I don't think anyone in the household has any doubt what you were up to all afternoon the other day.'

Even though Theo ignored him, Lord William ploughed on regardless.

‘Now then, Theodore, did you take precautions?'

‘Did I take what, Your Lordship?'

‘Precautions. Precautions, you silly dolt.'

‘Against what?'

‘Against getting the young lady pregnant, of course. Oh…' Lord William's voice trailed off as realisation dawned on both him and his elder daughter at the same moment. Looking up from her book, Rosanna shrieked with laughter.

‘He doesn't know the facts of life, Father! He's twenty-two years old and he doesn't know how a baby's made!'

‘Do you, Theodore?'

Both Lord William and Rosanna were gratified to see Theo blush slightly.

‘No,' said Theo. ‘Should I?'

‘Given your activities the other afternoon I think it would be as well, yes. Rosanna, would you pop down to the kitchen and fetch a carrot, please?' Waiting for Rosanna to return, Lord William turned back to Theo.

‘How much do you know?'

Glancing helplessly at Marina and finding even she was desperately trying to keep her laughter in check, Theo resorted to looking at his fingers.

‘I'm guessing it's got something to do with sex,' he mumbled eventually.

‘Well done,' said Lord William sarcastically. ‘I should have thought of this sooner. No one's actually taught you the facts of life. Ah, thank you, Rose; a nice, big carrot.'

Theo looked at the carrot in confusion, wondering what it had to do with making babies. Rosanna had guessed exactly what the carrot was for and she sat herself down beside Theo, laughing helplessly. On the other side of him Theo could feel Marina shaking with laughter too, but she laid a hand on his arm to show she wasn't trying to mock him.

Fishing in his pocket, Lord William said, ‘This…look at it, Theodore…This is a condom.'

‘OK, Your Lordship. I haven't a clue what that is.'

‘Here. Open the packet.' Theo did as he was told and Lord William continued, trying to ignore the laughter of his daughters.

‘Now, when you have sex, Theodore, and you…you know…finish off…'

Sensing his father's discomfort, and that his sisters' laughter was more at Lord William's expense than his, Theo felt the corners of his own mouth starting to twitch.

‘You…finish off and…your seed goes into…well it goes inside the lady and, erm sometimes meets her egg. If this happens and your…er…seed fertilises the egg, nine months down the line we've got a baby Theodore on our hands.'

Pulling himself together, Lord William injected some authority back into his voice.

‘Stop laughing, all three of you! This is serious! Theodore, I don't want you making babies with Catherine Lorimer; God knows, you can barely look after yourself.' Theo would have argued that point, but he knew that if he tried to speak he would just have dissolved into helpless laughter.

‘Right, Theodore, the trick is to stop your sperm getting to Catherine's egg, and that's where the condom comes in. Have a look at it. How do you think it works?'

Theo examined the condom, then started to blow it up like a balloon.

‘NO!' roared Lord William as all three of his offspring rolled on the floor, crying with laughter. ‘I wish I'd worn one of these things myself a bit more often. Give it here, Theodore!' Prising the condom out of his son's hand, Lord William commanded him to, ‘Watch!'

‘Right, Theodore. You put the condom on like so.' Using the carrot, Lord William demonstrated how to put on a condom. ‘Once it's on, nice and secure, you can go ahead and have sex. Your semen collects in the condom, which you carefully dispose of afterwards. It doesn't reach Catherine's egg, and we don't have any silly accidents. Do you understand?'

‘Yes, Your Lordship,' replied Theo, his voice wobbly with laughter. ‘I put the condom on the carrot and there'll be no baby Theodores.'

‘Oh for God's sake!' Thoroughly exasperated, Lord William threw the carrot at his son before stomping from the room, leaving his children rolling around, screaming with laughter, on the family-room floor.

When Theo looked back on this incident it always seemed to him that it marked the end of normal life – if his life could ever have been called normal. The next day, everything went horrible.

As Theo and Cathie were getting intimate in London the day after Boxing Day, things were already getting rather horrible in Applethwaite. Lysander was brought back down to earth with a bump having checked his phone first thing and found a message from Lord William that had gone ignored since the previous afternoon.

‘Get back to London, Trevelyan! Immediately!'

Nervous that he'd already let time elapse before obeying His Lordship's command, Lysander began packing his things and preparing to leave, all under the accusatory eye of Louis.

‘I thought you were staying for a few days, Dad.'

‘I can't, Louis; I've got to go back to London.'

‘You said you'd stay!' said Louis in an unusual fit of petulance. ‘You said you'd watch me train today. You said you wouldn't check your phone…'

This was all true. Carried away by the free beer and the warm, Unsponsored camaraderie, Lysander had declared the previous afternoon that he wouldn't check his phone for a few days.

‘Let His Lordshit wait!' he'd yelled, basking in the approval of Louis and the other Unsponsored. However, in the cold light of day, Lysander had a change of heart.

‘How will it help anyone if I antagonise His Lordship…shit…'

‘Once a Sponsor, always a Sponsor,' grumbled Louis, before hitting on a previously unvoiced thought.

‘Did you know His Lordshit was drugging Mum?'

Lysander froze. He'd hoped he was going to get away without anyone thinking of that question.

‘Louis…' he pleaded.

‘Just bloody answer, Sponsor!' snapped Louis, in an extremely bad mood by now.

‘I won't lie to you…'

‘That'll make a refreshing change!'

‘LET ME SPEAK! I knew to start with. I was commissioned by His Lordshit to court your mother, win her affections, get one of the Scheme's main critics off our case…'

‘You bastard!'

‘Thank you, Louis. Thank you for hearing me out, then coming to a measured and intelligent conclusion. You're young. You're impetuous, just like I was then…'

‘There's no comparison! There's no way I'd let anything bad happen to Abi…'

‘You've got the benefit of hindsight, Louis. I didn't. I'll admit I thought the Scheme was the be all and end all, but…BUT…' Lysander held up a hand to hush his son, ‘I did fall in love with your mother. I love her to this day. She knows that, she knows the truth. I don't want us to part on bad terms again, Louis. I love you too…'

‘YOU GOT MY MOTHER HOOKED ON DRUGS!' yelled Louis, totally losing control and making Sarah pop her head into the family room to see what was going on. ‘Sarah, it was him…'

‘I've got to go, Louis. I haven't time to put up with your histrionics.'

Walking out with his bag, Lysander packed it into the boot of his car and turned to find his wife at his side.

‘You've told him,' she said simply.

‘Yes. Please try to explain. I'm so sorry, Nik…'

‘I know,' said Nicola. ‘I know that, silly. Go on, get away! I'll deal with our Louis.'

Kissing her husband and reassuring him that she did love him, Nicola then turned and went back inside the house. Not only was it freezing cold outside, she also realised that her son needed calming down with immediate effect.

‘Louis,' she said, entering the family room and finding Louis chatting animatedly to Sarah. Leaping up, Louis flung his arms around his mother.

‘Mum! I can't believe that bastard…'

‘Shut up, Louis!' said Nicola sharply, shocking Louis into obeying. ‘Don't ever talk about your father with that lack of respect again! NO!' she continued as Louis tried to interrupt. ‘Lysander gave me my first drugs. He was young and naive, torn between loving me and wanting to do well in the Scheme. He didn't realise what they were, thought they were some super new vitamins. By the time he did realise it was too late. His Lordshit's doctors kept me supplied. Hopelessly addicted, I kept taking the drugs. I'm so sorry, darling, I've been a useless mother. I was off my head by the time you were born, let alone Jenny…'

‘You were drugged, Mum. It wasn't your fault. Why didn't he stop it?'

‘Lysander was told I was ill. He was told that the so-called doctors were keeping me sane; actually they were supplying me with drugs. It was only when you and Gideon intervened…Well, you know the rest.'

Louis was silent for a while, packing his kit into his bag to resume his training for the Games. Finally another thought struck him.

‘Why did His Lordshit's doctors treat you? Why not Jess?'

‘Jess is a GP. His Lordshit told Lysander that the Sponsor doctors were specialists, that I'd probably do something stupid without their care. Look, Louis darling, your father's begged me for forgiveness and I've forgiven him. I love him. He loves me. We move on from here…'

‘But…'

‘LOUIS! We move on! Avenging Dory is the priority now; the future not the past.'

‘I'm not happy now about him knowing about Dory's Avengers, what if he…'

‘Darling, he won't. I know you're angry, Louis, but your dad loves you. I love you, and we're both so proud of you. Now get off to training before Gideon skins you alive!'

Still fuming, Louis kissed his mother and Sarah then headed for Gideon's studio.

‘You're late…' began Gideon when Louis walked through the door, but Louis stopped him.

‘Shut up, Gid, I'm not in the mood. You've not got a monopoly on bad tempers, you know.'

No more would Louis say until he'd changed and warmed up then, in between complex moves on the parallel bars, the whole tale came out.

‘I can't believe she still loves him,' said Louis, landing neatly on the floor at the end of his routine.

‘How much would you forgive Abilene?'

‘Abi would never…'

‘Nor did Lysander! I admit I hated the fact that Nik was falling for a Sponsor, but he loved her, Louis. He still does.'

‘But he…'

‘Made a mistake! Everyone makes mistakes, Louis.'

‘I can't believe you're sticking up for him, Gid…'

‘Stop calling me Gid, Louis! Just because you're cross doesn't give you special dispensation.'

‘Oh piss off…'

‘GET ON THOSE RINGS AND SHOW ME SOME GYMNASTICS!' roared Gideon.

Louis's day continued to deteriorate. His training got worse and worse; at one point he nearly twisted his ankle through lack of concentration, earning him another blast of abuse.

‘I TOLD YOU NOT TO GET PISSED SO MUCH!'

‘It's nothing to do with Christmas; I've got a lot on my mind…'

‘BULLSHIT! It's because you're full of food and beer! You need to concentrate, or I'm not training you anymore.
I'm not having my name associated with you if this is the sort of performance you'll put on at the Games…'

‘Oh, fuck off, Gideon!'

‘TREVELYAN!'

Labouring his way miserably through his training, Louis admitted to himself that he had put on weight over Christmas. When Gideon let him call it a day, Louis finally started to calm down, and resolved during his shower to apologise to his mentor. Unfortunately, Gideon had gone by the time Louis had washed and changed. Locking up carefully, if a little bit miserably, Louis set off to fetch Jenny from a friend's house. The first person he encountered on the Main Street was Abi, and his spirits lifted for a second until he noticed the tension in her body as she stared across the road at the Applethwaite Guesthouse.