Dreams of Perfection (Dreams Come True) (22 page)

Chapter 43

Darcy checked her watch once more.

“They’ll be here,” her mother admonished. “Go enjoy your party. You only turn thirty once.”

“Thank God for that,” Darcy muttered. She knew her mother was right, but she didn’t feel much like celebrating. The day she’d been both dreading and looking forward to had arrived, and with it, the realization that dreams don’t always come true.

No sign of Josh or Laura anywhere, and no word from them either. Maybe Laura was still angry with her. Or maybe they were having too much fun together to break away for her party.

Her mother handed her a tray of food and shooed her out of the kitchen, “Go. Mingle. Eat. Drink. Be merry. It’s what one does at parties, especially when one is the guest of honor.” 

Darcy stepped out onto the patio then into the enormous tent rented for the occasion. Several tall kerosene heaters chased away the October chill, white twinkle lights provided illumination, and a local DJ spun the latest dance tunes, while a caterer supplied delicious appetizers and bite-size desserts.

Speaking of the caterer, she looked down at the tray of food in her hands. Why was
she
serving the food?

“Mom,” she said under her breath as she found room for it on the food table.

Anne and Matt emerged from the darkness, clothes disheveled, hair mussed. They’d been incorrigible since their reconciliation.

“Hey there, Birthday Girl!” Matt called out.

“Hey, Matt. You might want to zip your fly,” Darcy said.

“Oops.” He turned his back as he tucked his shirt in and zipped up.

Anne didn’t miss a beat as she plucked a goat cheese appetizer off the tray Darcy’d carried out. “Worked up an appetite.” Winking at Darcy, she took a bite then stuffed the other half in Matt’s mouth when he turned back around, before kissing him.

“Get a room,” Darcy muttered and stalked off.

Brandon and David chatted with Aunt Rosie and Uncle Al, while Will and Sam slow danced together.

How cute is that!
Even in her heartbroken state, she could still delight in puppy love.

Her parents had certainly spared no expense, and friends and family had come in from all over the East Coast to celebrate her birthday. The least she could do was make a show of enjoying herself. Her father helped in that endeavor when he pulled her into his arms for a dance.

“How is it my baby girl is thirty today? Where did the time go?”

“I don’t know, Dad.” She sighed as she laid her head against her father’s chest, his arms a comforting band of strength around her. “It seems like yesterday we were fishing off the dock and I hooked that striped bass.”

She heard her father’s chuckle deep in his chest. “The fish was so big I had to help you reel it in. You were so proud! You couldn’t stop talking about that fish for a month. Drove your brother and sister crazy.” He chuckled again, a soothing, familiar sound. “You must have been, what, twelve?”

“Ten.”

“Twenty years ago. Time does fly.”

Inexplicably, tears burned her eyes. She’d wasted so much of that time searching for a fictional Prince Charming—at least the last few years of it. She cleared her throat. “Dad. How did you know Mom was ‘The One’?”

He drew back and looked into her eyes before gathering her back for a hug. She’d told her parents before the guests began arriving that she broke up with Blake. Oddly, her mother had seemed relieved. And her dad, well, he’d seemed sanguine. “Oh, sweetheart. Just because it didn’t work out with Blake doesn’t mean you won’t find love.”

She didn’t tell him that she’d found love only after she’d lost it.

The party grew louder as
the alcohol flowed. Drunken revelers lined up for “The Electric Slide” as the DJ called out words of encouragement to those less inclined to make fools of themselves.

Darcy skipped out on the line-dancing fun and crossed the lawn to the river. Away from the warmth of the heaters, the fall air nipped at bare skin, sending goosebumps down her arms. Undeterred, she continued to the spot above where the lawn sloped down toward the river. Her breath puffed out in white clouds before dissipating in the dry air.

Stars winked in an ebony sky, no moon to dim their glow, while the river lapped gently against the bank and swished a little, as it wrapped around the dock pilings.

Still no Josh or Laura. Her eyes filled as she held back a sob. Even if they were a couple, she knew she wouldn’t forsake their friendship. Her birthday felt meaningless without them to share it with. She knew her life would feel the same.

They’d been there for everything. Especially Laura. The terrible teens, the crush she’d had on Billy Bradenton, the rejection letters from publishers, and the devastating blow when she’d caught Doug cheating on her. How could she have a life without Laura? Or Josh? She couldn’t.

Laura held a hundred-dollar b
ill up against the Plexiglas partition. “This is for you if you can get me to Riverdale in forty-five minutes or less.”

“You got it, lady,” the cab driver responded, an avaricious gleam in his eye and stepped on the gas, pinning Laura against the back seat.

She closed her eyes. What a day! Her trip to Chicago had netted her a potential lead for a client (and some celebratory shopping on the Magnificent Mile), but the journey home had been fraught with one snafu after another. She wouldn’t miss her best friend’s birthday party. Come hell or high water, she’d be there. And she’d beat Josh to a pulp if he gave Darcy her gift without Laura there.

On the bumpy flight from Chicago, she mulled over the argument she had with Darcy in the spa last week. Darcy’s reaction had been completely out of character for her. Laura had chalked it up to the stress of her book promotions, the fact that Blake Garrett would be coming out of the closet, so to speak, with the book’s release, and her writer’s block. Then it’d hit her like a jolt of turbulence. Jealousy, plain and simple. Jealousy over her and Josh, which could only mean one thing.

Darcy Butler loved Josh Ryan.

She’d been so wrapped up in her own drive for success that she’d missed all the signs. She and Darcy had known one another for so long, they were open books to one another. Laura had simply failed to read what was there in black and white.

Did Josh know? she wondered as the taxi sped down I-87. Did he love Darcy? God, she hoped so. She’d hate to have to kick his ass for breaking Darcy’s heart.

Josh stashed his luggage and messenger ba
g in the coat closet and made his way through the throng in search of the Birthday Girl. Talk about a day of ‘if something could go wrong it did.’ He’d missed his connecting flight in Boston due to weather delays in Dallas, and he’d had to wait around until the next flight. He’d begun to think he’d arrived without his luggage, since his made it onto the belt long after everyone else’s.

Then the train from Grand Central to Tarrytown stopped for about twenty minutes due to problems with the tracks. His phone battery gave up the ghost, so he couldn’t even send a text. The short taxi ride from the station to Jeff and Vanessa’s seemed interminable.

He only hoped he hadn’t missed the cake and the toasts.

He’d given a lot of thought to his relationship with Darcy over the last few days. His days had been packed solid. So much to learn about mediation, so many contacts to follow-up with, and so many documents to review for his upcoming trials, but none of that had managed to keep thoughts of Darcy at bay. He loved her, and only her. He had to tell her. If she told him she didn’t love him, then he’d deal with it, but at least she would know, and so would he.

He didn’t see Darcy or Blake as he scanned the crowd in the tent.

“About time you got here.” Gloria’s unmistakable gravel-pit voice came from behind him.

“Hi, Gloria. Have you seen Darcy?”

She pointed with her martini. “Last time I saw her, she was walking in the direction of the river. Alone.”

“Thanks,” he called over his shoulder as he hurried off to find her.

Chapter 44

Chilled to the bone, Darcy turned toward the house and saw someone striding across the lawn, someone with Josh’s height and build. Her pulse quickened, first with excitement, then with fear. The moment of truth. She stood, frozen to the spot. What should she say? How should she say it?
Hey, Josh. Did you and Laura enjoy your secret tryst?

“There you are!” He scooped her up and swung her around. “Happy birthday, Darcy!”

Dizzy from the spin, she grasped his jacket sleeves to steady herself. “Josh! I was beginning to think you weren’t coming.”

“Are you kidding? Nothing from a dead cell phone to a train wreck could keep me from getting to your birthday party.”

“Where’s Laura?” 

Josh pulled back in confusion. “What do you mean, where’s Laura? How would I know where Laura is?” He laughed. “I didn’t know it was my day to watch her.”

“You mean, but I thought—” Darcy laughed in relief.

Josh shook his head. “Mean what? Thought what?”

“Oh, nothing.” So they hadn’t been together? Or maybe they had, and they’d had an argument.

“My God, Darcy, you’re cold as ice.” He chafed his hands up and down her bare arms to warm them. “Let’s go inside.” He took her hand, gave it a gentle tug.

“No. I mean, in a minute. I need to talk to you first.”

“I need to talk to you, too, but let’s go somewhere warmer.”

Darcy relented, pointing to her father’s boathouse that served as a guest cottage when needed. Josh removed his jacket and draped it around her shoulders, engulfing her in his scent, his warmth. She shivered.

An awkward silence fell as they both crossed the dock leading to the entrance of the boathouse, not touching.

Josh flipped the light switch on a bedside lamp and gave the well-appointed one-room efficiency a cursory look before turning back to Darcy. “You warming up?”

“Mm hmm.” 

“Darcy—”

“Josh—”

They both chuckled, a nervous sound.

“You first,” Josh said.

“Oh. O-okay,” Darcy stammered. Her mouth suddenly went dry.
Deep breath. In through the nose, out through the mouth.
She’d practiced a long thought-out speech but suddenly couldn’t remember it. She’d waited too long to say the words.
Don’t back out now.
Her old fears surfaced. Fears she’d tried to face since Doug broke her heart. Fears of rejection.

What if they start dating, and it was great, and then it just . . . petered out? What if her track record continued and she bailed? Not such a big deal when it was a blind date, but devastating if it was Josh. Wasn’t it better not to start something only to have it crash and burn?

But they’d already started something, weeks ago in his hallway, in his apartment, against his front door, she reminded herself.
So just say it.
“I love you.”
How’s that for blunt?

Josh’s eyes widened a
nd his breath snagged in his throat. “You love me, how?” he asked, his mind a jumble of confusion and skepticism.

“I love you,” she said, taking a slow, deep breath, “like a woman loves a man.”

The confusion deepened. “What about Blake?”

“I broke up with him.” She took his hand, and before he could respond, rushed on. “Josh, it’s you I love. I guess it happened so gradually, I . . . I don’t know when it happened. I’ve loved you for so long.” Her voice trailed off as a tear slid down her cheek. “But I’ve taken you for granted, too, and I’m so sorry. Please, tell me I’m not too late.”

“Even if you don’t love me, I can’t lose your friendship over my selfish behavior. I had to tell you. You had to know.”

Josh gently cupped her face, his thumb catching the tear. “My God, Darcy. I’ve waited so long to hear you say that and mean it the way you do. Not just as a friend, but . . . the way I love you.”

She looked up at him in surprise. “You love me?” More tears threatened to spill as her eyes filled.

He pulled her to his chest, his arms wrapped around, held her close. “I’ve loved you for years, almost since the day we met.” His confession spilled out. “I’d finally worked up the courage to ask you out on a date, and the next thing I knew you were engaged. When Doug broke your heart, I wanted to both pulverize him and send him a thank-you gift—you were free, but I knew you needed space and time to heal. We became so comfortable with one another in such a short time. Best friends. The fear that I would lose your friendship if I told you how I felt, and the thought that it either might not work out or you wouldn’t feel the same, kept me from telling you.”

“Oh, Josh! How stupid and blind I’ve been. Can you ever forgive me?”

He tilted her chin up, brought his lips to hers, a butterfly kiss. “Nothing to forgive.” His gaze held hers, as he grazed her lower lip with his thumb. “I’m as much to blame for all this wasted time. I promised you once, that I’d always tell you the truth, even if it hurts. Well, I didn’t keep that promise. I kept my true feelings from you, and not telling that truth hurt. Hurt us both. I won’t do that again. I love you, Darcy Elizabeth Butler, and I intend to make up for lost time.”

She wound her arms around his neck as his jacket fell to the floor. “And just how do you plan to do that, Mr. Ryan?” She laughed through her tears.

“By making every second count.” He kissed her, this time with passion and heat, love, and want. His hands slid up her back then back down again, squeezing her bottom. “And by taking my time,” he murmured against her lips before slanting his mouth across hers, encouraging her to let him in, to caress his tongue with hers. 

Her fingers skimmed the back of his neck, raising goosebumps, before fisting in his hair. She pressed the length of her lithe, delicious body against his. He moaned when she made contact with his erection.

“I want to learn, touch, taste, every inch of you.” He licked and kissed, caressed and nipped at the tender flesh of her neck, her bare shoulders, the delicious skin along her collarbone, as her head rolled back to allow him unimpeded access. “I want to make love to you in every way possible, until every curve, every dip and hollow of your body is engraved in my memory.”

“Oh God, Josh,” she moaned. “I haven’t been able to forget what happened in your apartment, at your door, with you. I’ve never experienced anything like it.”

He choked out a laugh. “I haven’t forgotten it either. It’s burned in my brain forever. But I can promise you something, this time won’t be a partially clothed quickie against a door. I want to see you. All of you.” He spun her around, swept aside her hair, and unzipped her ruby-red dress as he pressed hot kisses on her bare back.

Her dress floated to the floor as she turned to face him, wearing nothing but red lace panties and stilettos. She went all shy, the blush rising from her toes to the roots of her hair.

“Okay, I see the fascination with those stilts. My God, you’re sexy!”

A throaty laugh bubbled up, sending a shot of heat straight to his groin. He’d never heard such a sensual sound coming from Darcy’s lips, and he hoped to hear more of that and other sounds of pleasure coming from her from this night forward.