Echoes in Eternity (The Pella Series Book 1) (35 page)

“Alex…” I murmur, my voice is laced with both a plea and desperate need.

“Let’s get this straight and out of the way Ellie,” he says in a husky voice, his gaze dark, firmly fixing me in my place. “You want to run away from me because of some misguided belief that I’m trapped here to protect you.” How the hell does he know that? My eyes widen and that’s confirmation enough for him. “Get that fucking thought out of your head!” he says baring his teeth as he speaks clearly, enunciating each word. “You need to stop your pity on me, and assessing me as if I were a mere human male,” he says startling me. He couldn’t look any less human than he does right now. But there is something more alluring in his stature, his restrain, and something more beautiful, ferocious, fear inducing, majestic and frightening in his gracefully fluid movements, and his well-oiled machine of a body. “I may look like one, talk, walk, fuck like one in the mechanics at least... well, I fuck much better,” he says with a lascivious darkening of his eyes. Then his tone changes to one of seriousness. “Despite the fact I keep telling you this; you don’t seem to get it. I’m. Not. Human!” he hisses, his words staccato. There’s visible tension in his posture. “I am a Nephilim; but unlike you, I’m not innocent. I endure with the strength of an angel and think like the devil. That’s why your father chose me. He made sure I didn’t lust after you or love you. He put wards against love and lust brewing between us so that my sole purpose would be to protect you. Because he knew I would form a physical and an emotional bond with you judging from the first vision I had of you. Look at me and tell me: How well do you think that worked?” he asks cocking his eyebrows as he pushes his hips into my belly making me feel the ridges of his thick, heavy erection. An involuntary gasp escapes my lips. The physical draw we have for one another is overwhelming, intoxicating, and all consuming.

“Yeah! So deal with it. I chose to protect you. I chose the bond of servitude. I, a free man made the choice!” he growls.

“But that’s not true! He gave you no choice; you were ready to be dragged to Hades! He took advantage of your misfortune!”

“Angel…” he sighs gently.
“No hellhound could get me through the gates of Hades! Because it’s against the
Divine Laws
which all heaven and hell must abide by no matter what Hades thinks it could do! I didn’t want to die in a bed like an old man because my father decided to correct his mistake,” he says bitterly, “by eliminating me and thereby earning his place back in Eden.” He removes one hand from the wall and caresses my face. “There were several reasons why I chose to protect you and none of which is what you think!” his voice is firm.

“But I saw your thoughts! You hardly had time to think!”

“I had time. I had twelve days. You only saw me in my last moments in my existence as an emperor. I was slipping in and out of consciousness. That’s why Marcus had to keep asking. He wouldn’t give me his name to identify himself. I didn’t want to submit to anything other than Elysium. But even after he identified himself, I was going to say no…” he confesses. That takes me aback.

“Why didn’t you?”

“Because, I saw your face,” he says and hope blooms in me.

“I liked women
, excessively. But, you were unlike any other woman I met; there was something different about you that immediately pulled me in. I wanted to know what that was, wanted to get to know you, and if I seized to exist while I was in your service, well…That would have been better than dying on a deathbed,” he confesses. My heart constricts. That’s not what I expected. I remember his thoughts on beautiful women.

“I see…” I say in a whisper, trying to hide the hurt.
Maybe I hoped to hear that he felt the thunderbolt as well, but perhaps this is better. He felt lust for me. I’ll take anything genuine from him.

“Then your father took away the possibility of me or you liking or loving each other or lusting after one another to prevent any future generation we might have created in order to save them from the same fate as you which was wise. Even if you did have sex with me or anyone, there were enough wards to prevent you from having children until…” he says, and then remembers something, and abruptly changes topics. “But clearly, there’s an expiration date on his wards…”

“What are you saying?” I ask in a soft voice tinged with barely concealed hope. All this information is overwhelming and cryptic. Is this why he didn’t use protection with me, because I couldn’t have children or am I misunderstanding him? The thought of it depresses me for some reason. I must have broken some of the wards, because I’m in love with Alex Pella deeply, completely, madly, utterly and irrevocably; I love him more than my own existence, but I don’t dare to voice the ‘
L
’ word to him. Alex shakes his head as his gaze is fixed on mine. What isn’t he telling me? We both have intense lust after one another.

“How do you explain the…” I rack my brain for a softer term of what we have been doing in the last two days?

“Insatiable fucking like there’s no tomorrow?” He asks as he rubs his erection slowly, sensually over my very alert sex once again, crushing his body into mine. The thin fabric of our shorts is ineffective. I can feel the throbbing thick rope between us.  My lips are parted, I start panting.

“Y.yes…” I whimper.

He puts his nose over mine and touches his forehead in a very humanly gesture, he knowingly pulls his body a touch away, making me feel bereft, needy for him. He has had countless women over his very long existence. He admits that he liked women excessively whereas I have no reference points at all. The only man I ever desired unreasonably, insanely and insatiably is currently caging me with his body to the wall. But the only point he’s touching me with now is his nose. Clearly, Marcus’s ward ran out its course, and Alex got his lust back he inherited from his father, and I got both the love and lust. Oh, shit! I’m totally fucked up! I’m in love with a man who can’t love me, but is only lusting after me! Why do I have these confusing feelings? Wouldn’t this make it easier for me to go away? It would be harder to leave him if he loved me.

“Are you saying we aren’t supposed to have the capability to like each other or lust after one another? That was my father’s form of birth control? Clearly I’m lusting after you excessively,” I say in a soft voice, turning crimson like a vampire in a bloodfest, my chest is heaving up and down with desire. “If
that
ward ran out, I’m pretty sure others ran out as well and what’s more, I could be pregnant now that we’ve had unprotected sex!” I breathe heavily with realization.

“Angel, your father took your ability to have children away until you matriculated into the fifteenth generation. At this point there’s one condition for you to get pregnant, and you have not reached it yet.”

“You said I’m in the sixteenth generation now. I have passed the point in the last matriculation. What condition are you talking about?” I’m hyperventilating. I could be pregnant! What an idiot I am! I could be pregnant! I have to remind myself to breathe. But I end up sounding like a panting dog.

“
Elissa, relax, angel,” he says holding me steady on my shoulders. “Yes, you are in your sixteenth matriculation. Every time you matriculated anew, you had your father who was always there to catch you from the moment you set your foot back into existence and guide you. You didn’t know any differently because he made sure that you lived a normal life each time. You grew up with him present in your life. But, I found you every time and protected you from the
Fallen
and Marcus from the Heaven’s curse. But the rules of the game, everything…” he says pausing; his eyes are shielded, and then continues, “…changed on your last matriculation. Nothing is the same. You have no Heaven’s curse hanging over your head anymore. Marcus’s primary purpose with this ward was to protect your children from Heaven’s curse and spare you the agony he has experienced. But the curse was lifted for your future generations on your fifteenth matriculation which is something Marcus didn’t take into account, and you could get pregnant,” he says smiling as if he’s privy to some secret. His expression changes into a grave one with remembrance. “But there is no such expiration date for the
Fallen
’s
desire to capture you; they are still after you.”

“That still doesn’t explain what prevents me from getting pregnant now. I could have gotten pregnant the last time I was around! What exactly is it?” Clearly it wasn’t something Marcus did to Alex since he had children. Alex remains quiet, examining my face.

“I can’t tell you what that is, Elissa. Not yet. Not without endangering you. All I can tell you is that I won’t get you pregnant until your body physically passes that point.”

“Great! I will probably know that I passed that point when I’m knocked up…” I frown. He actually grins at my frustration.

“It’ll be very clear to you
before
you get knocked up,” he says still grinning. Why is this amusing to him?

“Very reassuring!” I snort
, feeling relief. “What about STDs?”

“You’re not human Elissa. We are not prone to the diseases or variable health due to physical weakness.”

“We don’t get sick?” I ask.

“
Immortality has granted us unparalleled physical strength, well-being and immunity from human health problems. You’re not immortal yet, but I don’t carry diseases and I won’t give you a STD,” he says emphasizing.

“What makes you think that I’m asking about sex with you? What if I go and have sex with someone else with a human or another Nephilim?” I ask feeling brave, looking into his eyes. His nostrils flare, his stance changes to the dominant male protecting his female.

“Is there someone else you desire?” he croons in a low, dangerous voice. His right hand holds and searches my face. His gaze is predatory, focused. Why the hell am I goading him? Is it jealousy of women in his past? I feel inadequate because I don’t have the experience they have. My body and mind have completely different ideas. When my mind and heart think that I have to do right by him by setting him free, my body craves him incessantly, almost unbearably.

“You said you loved women excessively. You had countless numbers of them over the long stretch of time you’ve existed,” I say angrily trying, and failing miserably in covering my jealousy, “whereas I’ve only had you. The two women I met as I came down from your office said -- very brazenly and openly I might add that you had
fuckpads
all over the world and talked about how you indulged the two of them in long fucking sessions. Clearly, it seems it’s fair for you to have your pick of women--” I say and without letting me finish my words, he groans a deep guttural sound as he seals his lips over mine. I try to push him away, jealousy still running rampant to my surprise.

“Nooo!” I groan into his mouth. “You wanted to stop making love to me…” I say between his kisses.
To my utter surprise, I find the idea of him wanting to stop making love to me tormenting. “Why? You found me so bad in bed that you decided you can go and fuck someone else?” I utter without consulting my brain. Alex growls and swiftly leaning down, he scoops me off the floor, and slings me over his shoulder.

“Put me down!” I shout as I slap his buttocks.

“Go ahead and raise the stakes, angel. I’d be more than happy to reciprocate,” he mutters. He walks into the large bedroom, and deposits me on the bed. He looms over me and covers me with his body. He securely holds both my hands above my head with one hand. Still writhing in anger and jealousy, I try to buck him off me.

“Do you have any idea what a big turn on your jealousy is to me?” he groans as I struggle against him. “You want to hit me Elissa, for having had other women before?”

I lace my right leg around his left to roll him under. He grins knowing exactly what I’m trying to do.

“I’m not going to be your one of many!” I pant as I free one hand and manage to dig my nails on his back.
Because, it’s true. The idea of sharing him with others is abhorrent to me. He replies with a primal, a rather carnal groan, and pushes his hips into me with deep gyrating strokes, making me feel every ridge, every pulsing vein of his erection.

“I told you
that you and I are bonded! Nephilim bonds are nearly unbreakable!” he hisses as he tries to capture my lips with his teeth.

“Do I have to get in line with the rest of the Nephilim women you
were intimate with?” I grunt my question as I manage to roll him under me. But he grabs me by my buttocks, and rolls me right back onto the bed again.

“No! You’re the
only one
I’m bonded with!”

““How can I believe that when you have
said you fucked countless women over the centuries?” By Anthony’s accounts he was married. Strength drains from my limbs with realization: He did bond with someone else before. I stop struggling. He stops and hovers above me searching my face.

“How could I be the only one? I heard that you were married before. Surely you were bonded to your wife…” I say. He stops hovering and sits up as if I shocked him with ten-thousand volts of electricity. I slowly rise and sit cross legged on the bed looking at him. He turns his head to me and looks into my eyes.

“I was,” he says carefully in a whisper and his eyes fill with an ancient sorrow. His fingers caress my cheek slowly. “You want to punish me for having lived a long time, and accumulated a past Elissa? And in return, you want to exact revenge by having someone else inside you to somehow even up the score?” he asks with a pained voice.