Eloisa James - Duchess by Night (18 page)

A performance designed for a bishop, Harriet added.

Dear me, how lucky the Episcopancy is sometimes, Vil iers said. Nothing half so thril ing ever comes my way.

Thats just it, Strange said. One of the Graces, a lovely young thing by the name of Kitty, has offered a private performance to myself and Cope. That is, I believe she meant to offer it just to Harry, but I elbowed my way into the party.

Ungracious, Vil iers said. You are growing more countrified by the moment, Strange. Dont ever do that if one of the young ladies offers me a private performance. I should be forced to run you through. Miss Kitty agreed to perform for both of you, did she? An enterprising young woman.

Exactly, Strange said. Now, it occurs to me that perhaps young Harry here is not ready for some of the more exuberant aspects of Kittys likely performance.

While in Rome, do as the Romans, Vil iers said cheerful y.

Harriet blinked at him. He couldnt possibly be suggesting that she

Cum in Roman, esit as il Romani, Strange said, in what Harriet presumed to be Latin. And then, disastrously, he turned to Harriet and asked her a question, again in Latin.

Harriet panicked. She didnt understand a word of it, and yet of course as a young gentleman she ought to. Every gentleman understood Latin.

Vil iers smoothly cut into the conversation with a Latin remark of his own. Whatever he said, it seemed to shut up Strange. He nodded sharply. There was an odd, wild light in his eyes that made Harriet a bit nervous, but at least he didnt keep talking in Latin or expect her to say anything in reply.

Harriet shot Vil iers a quick glance. She didnt dare look pleading in front of Strange, but obviously she had to avoid Kitty somehow. Because it was clear that what Kitty and Strange had in mindwhatever that was exactlywas nothing she wanted to join.

I have just affirmed to my friend Strange that I certainly want you, young Harry, to come into your manhood, Vil iers said.

You did, Strange said. You did.

And yet

Exactly, Strange said. They smiled at each other.

Vil ierss skin was so white it looked blue. Some might cal him haggard due his thinness, and yet somehow his loss of flesh just emphasized his masculinity. He looked like a fierce lion, temporarily caged, beaten and starved, but stil deeply dangerous.

Wild at the core.

Strange was entirely different: lean but muscled. He had the look of someone who had walked through hel or a lot of brandyand come out the other side wiser, tougher, and with his sense of humor intact.

The sardonic lines by the sides of his mouth deepened every time he looked at her and she final y knew the name to put on that emotion: laughter. She was dying to know what they said to each other in Latin, and yet she couldnt ask.

Wel , Harry, Vil iers said. Would you like to handle young Kitty alone? He was daring her. She saw it in his eyes, the spark of delight there in the fact that he was putting her on the spot.

Vil iers had told her that men were straightforward and use Anglo-Saxon words. Was fornicate an Anglo-Saxon word? It was the only one that came to mind, and it sounded too pedantic.

She raised her chin. Im looking forward to meeting Kitty, she said. Privately. She turned to Strange with a show of deference. If youl forgive me, my lord.

Not at al , Strange said promptly, that strange laughing light in his eyes again. I think you and Miss Kitty wil have a truly delightful time in private, and I would just be in the way.

Exactly, Harriet said.

Couldnt I watch? he asked. I have a room with a hidden peep-hole.

She blinked but there was laughter in his voice. She was beginning to tel when he was serious and when he was laughing.

Stop taking the piss out of my ward, Vil iers said, his voice sounding more tired than it had a moment ago. The day you need to get pleasure by watching another couple perform is my last visit here.

Strange laughed. You never know. I could whisper encouragement to Harry through the arras.

Some things are instinctive, Vil iers said, his words blurring together.

Harriet stood up. It would be most ungracious of me to keep Kitty waiting. Where did you fix our appointment, my lord?

I thought you were going to cal me Jem.

Am I right in thinking you told Kitty your library? If youl forgive me, Il join her. I am natural y quite eager.

Natural y, Strange drawled. What young man wouldnt be? Kitty is so nubile, so luscious, so charming in every way. I do wish you the best of evenings.

In the Company of Angels

K ittys angel costume was fashioned from a few twists of cloth and a pair of feathery wings. If angels looked like this, men were going to find Heaven a very interesting place.

Harriets heart sank. Obviously, she was going to have to expose her own gender in order to get out of the room without disrobing. And she wasnt ready.

She loved being taken for a man, being given steak to eat for breakfast, being told to pummel someone until he farted crackers.

She didnt want to go home and have docile conversations with the vicar. She didnt want to get on a side-saddle and ride decorously over a field or two before her hip started aching from the unbalanced effect of the saddle.

She definitely didnt want to spend two hours staring glumly into a mirror while her maid dressed her hair into an arrangement that included a ship in ful sail.

She closed the door behind her, but before she could say a word, Kitty flew across the room in a burst of giggles. Harriet recoiled for a moment, thinking she was about to be kissed, but it turned out that Kitty simply wished to loosen Harriets cravat.

Im afraid that Lord Strange cant be here, Harriet said, holding on to her cravat rather desperately.

Kitty bounded around Harriet, turning the key in the door, and giggling al the time.

Oh dear, Harriet said to herself, quietly.

Then Kitty came back and stood before her. Now, Harry, she said. I know how youre feeling.

Harriet felt pure, unadulterated panic. You do?

She nodded. Youre a little scared. Everyone has a first time. And of course its a bit more difficult for a man, given as he has to perform. But Im

It had to be said. Im not Harriet began.

But Kitty was giggling again. Dont tel me this isnt your first time, Harry, because Id hate to cal you a fraud this early in our acquaintance!

A fraud? Harriet repeated faintly.

Kitty had a look in her eye that made Harriet want to dash for the hil s, so she took a deep breath and steeled herself. Goodbye breeches, goodbye wild morning rides, goodbye fencing

Im not a man, she said clearly.

Wel , not yet, Kitty squealed. She reached for Harriets hand, but Harriet fel back a step.

I truly mean what I say. Im not a man.

There was a moment of silence in the room. Harriet could hear the embarrassed thumping of her heart in approximate rhythm with the grandfather clock.

Youre not a man? Kitty asked. Real y?

Harriet shook her head. No.

But how did that happen? Kitty asked. Was it a childhood accident? Or something worse?

Harriet blinkedand then she suddenly realized she had been offered the perfect escape. Childhood accident, she said sadly. I couldnt bring myself to tel you, because I find you so beautiful.

Oh Kitty breathed. You poor thing. Her eyes lost the luminous, excited tint they held, and began glowing with sympathy. It must be so embarrassing for you to tel me. Of course you dont want anyone to know. Her eyes widened. No wonder you didnt want Lord Strange to join us!

Harriet heaved a deep sigh. You can have no idea.

Theres a eunuch in the Queens Revels company, Kitty offered. He sings al the high parts. Ive never met him, but everyone says his voice is beautiful. You know, this al makes sense now. Your voice is very high.

It never changed, Harriet admitted.

I suppose it wouldnt. Is there anything I can do? Kitty looked trepidacious but wil ing.

Theres nothing anyone can do. Its al just too, too humiliating. For a moment Harriet thought shed gone too far, but of course Kitty was used to people dramatizing themselves, and she didnt even blink.

Wel have a drink, she said, patting Harriet on the shoulder. Brandy is a great help when it comes to humiliation. Why, there was the time when I was auditioning to be in the chorus at the Drury Lane theater, and the manager asked me if I could play the part of an ape. He wanted a private audition.

What on earth did he mean?

Rol around on the floor, head over heels, in some sort of gymnastic feat. She walked over to the sideboard and poured two hefty doses of brandy and brought them back. Here, Harry, this is for your health. You never know. Maybe youl regain capacity when youre a bit bigger. Anyone can tel that you have a nice package there. Its just a dirty shame that it doesnt work.

Yes, isnt it? Harriet said, silently blessing the wool stocking tucked down her breeches that formed her package. They sat down on the couch, and Harriet said, So the manager wanted you to be a gymnast?

Private performance, Kitty said. Unclothed.

Harriet choked.

Head over heels, around and around the stage. He offered me quite a lot of money for it. But I dont do that sort of thing. She made a prim mouth. Theres being naughty for the pleasure of it, if you see what I mean. And then theres just plain naughtiness, as my mother would say.

Harriet drank some more. This was definitely the most interesting period of her life. There could be no comparison to the turgid conversations shed general y had at bal s. Is your mother stil alive? she ventured.

Of course. Shes one of the principal dancers with Prince Georges troupe, down in Brighton. She always laid down the rules for me. I do a private performance now and then, but only for my own pleasure. If you do such things for money, you become hard and bitter.

Why? Harriet asked curiously.

You are a young one, arent you? For one thing, youl probably get an il ness and then youl look back and regret making yourself sick for twelve pence. Or whatever the sum happened to be.

But couldnt you get an il ness anyway? Harriet asked.

Its not going to happen.

Why on earth not?

Because its a different sort of thing, Kitty said, rather obscurely. And if you start doing things only for money, wel , then youre not enjoying yourself, are you?

I expect not, Harriet said. She was starting to think that whatever she and Benjamin had done in their marital bedchamber had little to do with Kittys idea of enjoyment.

I shouldnt even talk of this to you, Kitty said, looking stricken. You being unable to take pleasure, I mean. I do apologize.

Thats quite al right, Harriet said. I like to know, even though I cant partake.

Thats even sadder, Kitty said, her eyes getting a bit misty.

So, Harriet said hastily, wil you take a husband someday?

Ive had three proposals of marriage, Kitty said. I suspect that I wil take the next one. Ive always liked the number four.

There was something about Kittys reasoning methods that made Harriets head spin. But what if you dont care for the fourth man?

I like most people, Kitty said cheerful y. Someone like you would be perfect. Except she paused delicately.

Yes, Harriet said, finishing her glass of brandy. I see exactly what you mean.

After a second glass of brandy, Harriet pul ed off her peruke and loosened her cravat. Then Kitty took that cravat and il ustrated an interesting way to tie someone to the bedpost (or any other handy pole, she explained earnestly), using just one wrist and the cravat.

Kitty didnt handle her third glass of brandy al that wel , although she insisted on drinking it. She turned quite pink and it was hard to make out what she was saying between bursts of giggles.

Come on, Harriet said, hauling Kitty into a standing position. We need to find something to eat.

We can just ring for the butler. You can simply ring that bel and anything Kitty waved her arm wildly anything wil be delivered right to you. You cant imagine what we al asked for our first two days here. I demanded champagne for breakfast!

And they brought it to you?

Of course, Kitty said, toppling to the side. Perhaps I should eat something. I was so excited about the evening that I didnt real y eat supper.

Harriet steered her toward the door. Once in the hal way, Kitty remembered that she was planning to marry the next man who asked her and started speculating about his age. And the size of his member.

Harriet cleared her throat. She was certainly learning a great deal that evening, never having seriously considered such a question before. But she was also feeling slightly dizzy.

Povy took one look at them and then tucked Kitty under his arm.

He snapped his fingers at a footman. Fetch Lord Strange.

Oh, you needntyou mustnt, Harriet protested.

His lordship likes to be informed of al events, Mr. Povy said, gliding across the corridor with Kitty in tow, as if a drunken young woman dressed as an angel was al in a days work.

Which it probably was, Harriet had to realize.

Come on, Harry, Kitty cal ed. Harry!

Harriet reluctantly fol owed them into the sitting room.

Strange is coming here, isnt he? Kitty said, fixing her eye on Povy.

Povy said, I real y couldnt say, miss. He might come if hes free.

I expect hel ask me to marry him, and I think Il accept. Unless you wish to ask me, Harry. She appeared to have forgotten the manifest reason why Harry (or Harriet) couldnt engage in marriage.

The main thought that went through Harriets mind was utterly surprising and fiercely violent. She pushed the thought away. It was none of her business whom Jem Strange asked to marry. Though he would never ask Kitty, any more than she herself would.

If youl forgive me, I wont ask you to marry me at this time, she told Kitty.

Povy deposited Kitty on a chair. Hot buttered eggs, he told the footman. Hot tea, and I should think some salmon sandwiches as wel .