Emergence (Eden's Root Trilogy) (4 page)

------------ Fi ------------

“We have to get you to the medical pod right away,” Asher said
, as he helped Fi to rise.

“No!”
She doubled over as another contraction hit her. Through her pain what she felt was terror.
Anywhere but the medical pods
, she thought.
It’s just like a hospital, and people go to hospitals to die.

“Please
, Fi,” Asher urged, pulling her. “We may need the equipment.”

She set her feet and yanked back.
“No! I’m not going! You can’t make me. No!” Asher tried to pick her up and she fought him, kicking, until another contraction hit and she slumped to the floor, sobbing. “Please, I don’t want to go there. Anywhere else. Please.”

Asher crouched beside her
. “Ok,” he whispered. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry. Let’s go to your pod, ok?”

She nodded and he helped her up
. The four walked ten steps before Fi screamed as another contraction bit into her spine. Without a word, Asher lifted her and carried her. This time she didn’t protest. She was in too much pain to do anything.

When they found her pod, Asher set her on the bed and Sara pushed him back
. “Sorry, Asher, but it’s time for Fi and me to be in charge.” She began removing Fi’s shoes. Her movements were calm. “You boys go to the medical pod and grab anything you can find that may be useful.”

“What do we need?”
Sean asked, his voice rising to a squeak.

Sara propped Fi’s body up with pillows
. “Anything that says obstetrics or gynecology. And grab things like linens, gauze, scissors…” Sara rattled off her instructions and the boys scuttled away. “You’re going to have to start breathing better, Fi.” Sara’s tone was firm. “When it hurts, try to breathe through it like any pain, ok?”

Fi nodded, unable to argue
. Her mind spun as she lay in the darkened pod that had once been her safe haven.

Sara grabbed her hand
and made Fi meet her gaze. “I’m going to have to touch you and, you know…see things, to help you.”

Fi realized that Sara was asking permission to serve as her doctor
, and she nodded, still unable to verbalize. Another contraction tore through her and she felt herself starting to shake as the fear and adrenaline took over.

“Breathe, Fi!”

Fi took a deep breath and blew it out slowly. It didn’t lessen her pain, but it helped with the shakes.

“Good.
”

Fi lay back as Sara stripped off her soaking
clothing and pulled a sheet up over her legs. She couldn’t believe all this was really happening.

Sara grabbed her hand, startling her
. “When the contraction hits, we’ll breathe together and you squeeze my hand. Ok, Fi?”

“Ok.”
Her voice emerged, small and strangled. They breathed together through successive waves of contractions, Sara managing to suppress her grimace as Fi crushed her hand. Fi didn’t notice Sara counting, but she didn’t need a timer to tell her that things were getting worse. Each small break between contractions was a panting, gasping, sweaty recovery, but Sara remained calm, barking out orders to breathe and nodding approval.

“Sara,” Fi croaked, “how do you know this?”
It was all she could manage as she breathed through another contraction. “Ugh, there’s no break anymore.” It was a torturous Morse Code…the dashes of pain getting longer, the dots of break few and far between. Just a few seconds, a gasp, and then into the next. The only thing keeping the shaking at bay was the breathing and Sara’s firm grasp.

“Your contractions are getting closer together
, Fi. It’s going pretty quickly.”

“Is that ok?” Fi asked, suddenly panicked
. For the first time since the pain had begun, she worried about the baby.

“I don’t really know,” Sara admitted, shaking her head
. “The only things I know are because I’ve been present for a birth. I was eleven and my aunt was deeply into the home-birth thing. All the women in the family helped out. So, I’ve seen it before and I know what happens.”

Fi nodded, app
reciating Sara’s honesty. What Sara didn’t say was what they would do if something went wrong. Fi knew enough about childbirth to know that women used to die…and babies used to die…a lot. And here they were with no doctor, no electricity, no painkillers, no nothing, and she was having a baby.

Oh my God
, she thought.
I’m having a baby.

When the boys returned with supplies Fi was exhausted, her loose curls stuck to her face and neck with sweat. Though the sheet Sara had provided protected her modesty, the boys still stopped short at the sight of her. There was no denying the significance of a sweaty, exhausted woman with her knees in the air. Fi knew it was the moment that they both really accepted that she was having a baby. Funny, she thought for a moment, only Sara seemed to have grasped it fully right from the start.

“Stop
staring and bring me what you’ve got,” Sara snapped, and waved them over.

Sean opened the pillowcase he was carrying and pulled things out for Sara to
inspect. “I don’t know,” he said, his hands shaking. “We just grabbed everything marked obstetrics and gynecology like you said.”

Sara rummaged through the bag and made some approving noises
. Her brow furrowed as she pulled out several metal instruments, but she smiled when she saw scissors. “Linens, sanitizer...oh good, gloves! Perfect.”

“I even grabbed one of those squeezy things,” Sean added
, just as Sara pulled it from the pillowcase. “They use those to clean the baby’s nose, right?”

Sara nodded, obviously pleased
, and gave Sean a quick kiss. “Great job, baby,” she murmured. “All right you two, now it’s time to get out. Go check on things and make sure we’re safe…and look for food. And maybe try to get the backup electricity going.” Sara delivered her wish list and Sean scurried out the door, clearly eager to leave, but Asher shook his head. When they’d entered, he’d rushed to Fi’s side.

Now
he held her hand with a stubborn expression. “No way,” he argued. “I’m not leaving her.” He turned to Fi. “We’ll get through this, baby, I promise.”

Despite her exhaustion, Fi found herself growing
annoyed. “What do you mean
we
? I think you must mean me and Sara because…aaaugggh!” Another contraction seized her. Asher’s grunt was the only indication that she had nearly broken his hand, but her pain pushed her frustration to full tilt. “Asher,” she panted, “please, I need you to leave. Go help Sean.”

She couldn’t hold it together through this kind of pain
, and she wouldn’t let him see her like that. He had to understand.

“No, Fi
. I should be here. I should help you.”

“You can’t help!
Now, please, Asher, get out!”

“Asher…
” Sara’s voice held a warning, and his head swiveled between the girls.

A harder contraction hit Fi
and took her breath away. The pain radiated down her legs, and the scream wrenched from her throat against her will. “GET OUT, GET OUT, GET OUT!”

Asher blanched and backed out of the room.

“All right, Fi,” Sara said. “Start breathing again. Let’s calm down. My aunt’s midwife said calm helps with pain.”

Fi nodded and groaned as the last one left her
. It had been ten times worse than the previous ones, and she didn’t know if she could make it through any more. She lay back against the pillow pile that Sara had built and breathed. When the next contraction hit, she tried desperately to breathe through it, but her instinct was to scream.

“Ok, maybe calm is out,
” Sara murmured, and then brightened. “Fi, you have to curse! Remember, you told me that cursing helps with pain when I had those really bad cramps. Remember?”

Fi knew that Sara was grasping at straws, but cursing didn’t seem like what she
needed. She shook her head as she breathed through the break again. It felt like the breaks were only fifteen seconds apart now, and the pain was getting worse.

“No, Sara.
I don’t want to bring the baby into the world with a bunch of cursing. Aaaauggh, motherf---er!” She screamed as agony lit her up again. “F---ing, shit, goddammit, motherf---!”

Wow,
Fi thought, amazed. The cursing didn’t help the physical pain, but it sure helped with the white-hot rage coursing through her veins. Her father would approve. He’d been a champion curser himself. The thought brought a weak smile to her lips as the blessed break began.

Then
the image in her mind changed. Her father’s kind face knitted into a frown. “Why did you leave Kiara?” he demanded. “How could you forget her?”

If she’d been in her right mind, she would have realized that her fatigue was playing tricks with her
. But instead she crumpled at his imaginary judgment and began to cry.

“I’m sorry, Papa
!”

“What, Fi?
What are you talking about?”

Fi shook her head,
her tears mingling with her sweat. She couldn’t contain her anger and sadness and fear. She no longer wanted to have a baby. She didn’t want to be there. She didn’t want to be at all. Another contraction seared her and she snapped to attention, keenly aware that what she wanted didn’t matter.

God, her back felt like it was going to break
. The pressure was unbearable. She was being squeezed and burned into cinders. “I have to push,” she gasped, unable to focus on her breathing.
Get it out, get it out, get it out
, she thought desperately, certain that she was going to die if she didn’t push. There had to be something wrong. No one could be expected to handle this much pain.

“
Wait,” Sara urged. “Let me take a look. I don’t think you’re supposed to push until…well, I don’t know. I think when you can sort of see the whole head.”

Fi heard Sara saying something, but she couldn’t focus on the words
.

“
I’m sorry, Fi. I’ll do the best I can not to hurt you, but I don’t really know what I’m doing.”

The concern in
Sara’s voice brought Fi back to feeling panic for the baby. “Please, tell me it’s ok. I feel like I have to push… I feel…” her voice trailed off into a series of curses uttered through gritted teeth. There were no breaks anymore. Only pain.

Sara’s head shot up
and she smiled tentatively. “I can see the head. The baby is facing the right way and, I don’t know, but I think you feel like you should push because you should.”

Fi nodded and took Sara’s offered hand, the only anchor in a world turned upside down
. For a split second, they met each other’s eyes. A momentary respite, a suspension of time…

“Ok, Fi, when you feel the contraction come, just take a deep breath and push.”

Fi felt her head bob again, but all her movements
were like a stranger’s. Though she heard herself responding to Sara and bearing down through the agony, it felt like she was watching a movie. Surely the pain knifing through her was not her own? Who was this woman, this young girl being ripped apart in the darkness? Why was she so resolute? What could possibly be important enough to endure this suffering?

                                         
----------------- Sean -----------------

“Where are we going
, Sean?”

The fear in
Asher’s voice made Sean’s stomach’s turn. He’d never known a single moment since they’d met when he’d been more together than Asher, and he didn’t know what to do to calm his friend.

“The Forge.
”

It
was all Sean could offer in reply. He needed to get to the Forge. The engineering wing of Eden would have everything needed to restore power, if it was possible. They raced across the main field pod, Sean cursing as they passed the downed apple tree. The rage he felt was so overwhelming that the only thing that could rival it was his fear. His mind was a shattered mirror, with the shards of Fi, the baby, and his missing family all tearing him to pieces. He couldn’t imagine how Asher felt.

They tore through the tunnels to the Forge and Sean turned into the first room, where he could search the piles of electronic materials
. He swung his flashlight around frantically seeking tools: wiring, tape, solder… His mind was racing. There was a clatter from the corner and they froze as a shadow darted from behind the shelves and headed for the door.

“Stop!”
Asher shouted, his sword already drawn. The shadow froze and doubled over, trembling.

“Please,” he begged, “don’t hurt me.”

Sean
recognized the voice. “Squeak?”

He
turned his flashlight into the blinking face of his disheveled and frightened friend. Asher sheathed his sword and Squeak quit his cowering. He dropped his hands and Sean saw that his eyes were tired and his face smudged.