Equal Access (27 page)

Then all he could do was wait for the rodent
to emerge from its lair.

Shad was just getting the RAT sent from the
intranet site as Pap returned with Mam. Pap stood behind Shad and
watched the monitor of the laptop.

Although his dad could identify virtually
every fauna and flora that crossed his path, the digital realm
remained a bit mysterious to him. But Shad still didn’t want Pap to
have any knowledge of what he was doing.

“You’re making me nervous,” Shad
grumbled.

“Come on, Dear.” Pap imitated Shad’s tone.
“We aren’t wanted.”

They drifted to the nearby magazine section.
Shad finished getting the RAT kicked off and made a quick job of
looking over lodging options in St. Louis before he closed down the
computer. Shad strode over to his parents and shrugged before
opening his arms.

“Sorry about that. I do usually try not to be
such a knot head.”

Mam took that opportunity to finally hug him.
Shad wrapped his own arms tightly around her. It had been a long
time since he’d hugged her like this – probably not since his
wedding day. Then Mam shared news about Dulsie as they headed back
out to the car to return home.

Dulsie was determined to dodge the pain
medication. Any time the staff showed up in her room, Dulsie would
put on a cheerful face and persuade them she really wasn’t in that
bad a shape, acetaminophen would be fine, thank you. Whenever
Dulsie thought no one was looking, though, Mam could tell that her
daughter-in-law was becoming more aware of the pain. Both she and
Jill tried to tell Dulsie there were stronger medications available
that would still be safe for the baby, but Dulsie was determined to
not take any chances.

That was Dulsie: brave, selfless,
bull-headed. Shad found himself contemplating that if he could only
give Dulsie back peace in her life, he’d take on even more agony to
give that to her. Let God do with him what He willed, just spare
Dulsie.

After supper, Shad went to his room and
finished packing the clothes he’d washed earlier that day plus a
couple more outfits from Pap. He had formulated a plan, and he had
to be packed. Now he also had to share just a little more
information with his parents.

When Shad went back downstairs, he found Mam
and Pap exactly where he expected to. They were out on the front
porch, sitting in the wooden lounge chairs Karl had built several
years ago. Both were in a semi-reclined position, and Pap was just
starting to light his pipe. Pap smoked an average of only two or
three times a week because there were plenty of evenings he didn’t
have time to indulge in that notoriety. Mam was reading a book, the
pages of which were pinned down with her thumbs to keep the breeze
that was blowing across the porch from flipping them untimely.

Shad half sat, half leaned on the railing,
just to one side of them. He took a moment to appreciate the spicy,
fruity aroma from the smoke before speaking.

“I’m leaving tomorrow morning.”

Pap looked up from his pipe in surprise and
Mam closed her book.

“Now what are you up to?” Pap frowned.

“I have some unfinished business to attend
to.”

“As in continuing what you started at the
bookstore?”

Shad leveled his gaze at Pap and met his eyes
for a few seconds. “There’s little else I can tell you.”

Pap and Mam looked at each other, and then
returned their attentions to Shad.

“Why are you so secretive?” Mam asked.

“Complicity.”

“More hacking?” Pap narrowed his eyes. “When
are you finally going to turn this over to the authorities?”

Shad took a deep breath. He’d rehearsed many
times in his head what he had to say, so now seemed the time to say
it.

“You two have done more for me than you’ll
ever really know. Thank you. Now I get to return some of that
favor.” He glanced toward Pap. “Most likely the sheriff will show
up tomorrow with a warrant to seize my computer and give it a high
tech combing through. You’ll be able to honestly tell them you
don’t know where I went, and they’ll have to take time to look for
me.”

Mam frowned. “Shad?”

“Don’t worry, I do want to talk to them as
soon as I finish this business. I’ve got this planned out. I’ve got
a backup plan. I’ll be back within a couple of days.”

“What about your excursion to the book
store?” Pap’s eyes were narrowed.

“You can tell them about that. Believe me,
the more they
want
my computer, the better for Dulsie.” Shad
smiled gently. “I just wanted to give you the benefit of knowing
I’m gonna leave before dawn. Don’t worry about me.”

“Oh sure.” Pap threw his hands into the air.
“We won’t worry about you one bit.”

“Are you absolutely sure this is what you
have to do?” Mam asked.

“I’m gonna use the law against itself. Hey, I
gotta do something to keep up the Delaney notoriety.”

“Oh great,” Mam muttered to Pap. “Now he’s
starting to sound like
you
.”

There is always a right and a wrong way, and the
wrong way always seems the more reasonable.

--George Edward Moore

Shad had to kill a little time around
Jefferson City before he boarded the train, which included
withdrawing a few hundred dollars at an ATM. If he was going to
leave a trail for law enforcement to follow, it would be both
convincing and convenient to pique their interest and make it a
challenge. They would figure out that he went to St. Louis, but St.
Louis was a mighty big place.

After he arrived at that destination, Shad
had plenty of time to walk with his overnight satchel and laptop
over twenty blocks to the hotel. During his online time at the
bookstore Shad selected this establishment as his base of
operation.

Since this was Thursday afternoon he had no
trouble acquiring a room and paid for it with some of the cash.
Despite his leisurely walk, July’s heat and the concrete conspired
to make him sweat through the tan shorts and olive button-down
shirt Shad wore, so he took a shower. After pulling on denim shorts
and a teal tee shirt, he figured it was time to carry out the next
part of his plan.

Shad took a nap.

Luckily his early morning and the afternoon
heat combined into enough of a force to overcome Shad’s anxiety if
the RAT had been activated, allowing him to fall asleep. When he
awoke early in the evening, Shad took a stroll to a nearby burger
joint to get a meal to take back to his room and eat. One of the
reasons he didn’t dine at the restaurant was the storm blowing in.
Large drops of rain began pelting the window in his room soon after
Shad started eating, and he spent a while after his meal standing
at that window and watching the wind create undulating curtains of
water while lightning intermittently brightened the sky with
outstretched bony fingers.

It seemed a bit odd that things like crowds
caused him emotional discomfort, but Shad was actually fascinated
by storms. Loud noises always gave him an adrenaline jolt, but Shad
learned long ago to suppress any reaction more active than a slight
wince. He had made use of an unseasonable storm that wasn’t
predicted to propose to Dulsie.

Early in November, on a beautiful, bright
day, they went hiking at a state park. They saw the storm blowing
in and tried to retreat to the trailhead, but it was fast and
overtook them just as they reached a small pavilion that was still
a few hundred yards from the parking lot. The wind blasted rain and
twigs into the shelter that provided little more than a roof, so
Shad immediately turned his back to the gale and clasped Dulsie to
his torso. It lasted only a few minutes, and Dulsie got wet, but he
got drenched. After the isolated thunderstorm blew over, Dulsie
laughed while she plucked off leaves and sticks that were plastered
to his shirt. Shad told her that he wanted to always be there for
Dulsie and share the rest of his life with her. Dulsie’s laughter
faded into one of the sweetest smiles he’d ever seen.

It was the same smile she beamed at him on
their wedding day as they stood at the front of the worship house,
and before a room full of witnesses solemnized their commitment to
each other. Shad unequivocally rated it as the best day of his
life, but he knew it should lead to other “best days,” such as when
they had children.

Shad stared into the storm and contemplated
how much he had been ignoring the fact he and Dulsie really did
have a child on the way. It was a reality almost difficult to wrap
his mind around, yet in another sense it was a reality so stark he
knew his life was forever changed. With an all too familiar twinge
of guilt Shad remembered that for a split second, after he learned
Dulsie had been shot, the thought surfaced in his mind things would
be better for them if Dulsie lost the baby. Some father he was
turning out to be.

The rain began falling more smoothly and the
rumble of thunder was no longer preceded by loud cracks. As Shad
watched the halos of light caused by the streetlamps try to
penetrate the early darkness, he pondered the concept that for the
next eight and a half months Dulsie and the baby were physically
one. What she benefited from, the baby benefited from. Shad
remembered the pure joy Dulsie was expressing just before he blew
her world to bits. She would be a wonderful mother, which was one
of the many reasons he’d married Dulsie.

Most people had to wait for a second chance
at a better family life until after they grew up and had a family
of their own. Quaid Delaney saw the opportunity when Grace offered
him shelter and he seized it. Shad was one of those few people
given a second chance during his childhood. Quaid’s legacy had
drawn him in and turned Shad from the path of being a destroyer of
families and childhood innocence to a defender. Now he stood here
with a third chance, and Shad admitted he wasn’t getting off at a
very good start.

His concern for Dulsie now included concern
for their child. When somebody had almost killed her, he almost
killed their first child.
Their
child. He had a child. It
wasn’t on the ground yet, but Shad was responsible for their child.
It needed him now to take care of its mother just as it would need
him later to take care of it. It. Him.
Her
.

Shad told himself he had been flirting with
cowardice. On the fifty percent chance he had a daughter Shad had
allowed fear and anxiety to dictate his actions. His determination
to bring Dulsie’s attacker – their child’s attacker – to justice
had finally moved him to where he was supposed to be. He couldn’t
allow fear to rule him again. After all, every Delaney knew it took
balls to be a man.

Tonight’s storm subsided and finally midnight
came. Shad sat at the small desk in the room and linked his
computer to the hotel’s internet access.

The dirty rodent had performed its duty
admirably. In a matter of minutes Shad had as much access to
Wally’s computer as though he were sitting in front of it instead
of his personal laptop in a hotel room.

First he perused Wally’s email even though
Shad knew he wouldn’t find any messaging about arranging a hit on
him. But there might be contacts to make note of. As Shad sifted
through the different folders of the mailbox he began to notice
patterns of people both Wally and his wife Lynette kept contact
with. One address that drew Shad’s attention was for a young woman
who made frequent references to “Tyler” and Lynette’s older son.
Shad delved deeper and made a discovery that made his blood run
cold.

Although not married, Lynette’s son and this
woman had a son themselves. Shad berated himself for assuming that
because the sons weren’t married they didn’t have any children.
Worse yet, Shad discovered through more investigation that this
Tyler was almost five years old. And late in the afternoon his
mother was going to drop the boy off to spend the evening with his
grandparents while she went shopping.

A whole new wrinkle had been added to Shad’s
agenda. He couldn’t let Wally have access to this boy for even one
more day. He was going to have to move more quickly than originally
planned, but Shad needed to gather the incriminating evidence he
had come here after.

So he proceeded to tap into what websites
Wally had gone to. There might not be anything on Wally’s computer
about attempted murder, but Shad was confident he could find
something to support Wally was still engaged in other criminal
activity.

The internet was a boon to molesters. Before
the 1990’s they had been relegated to personal contact in
back-alley bookstores and secret mailings to support their sense of
community and gain access to images that offenders seemed compelled
to hoard and share. But the internet, with its apparent anonymity,
removed many of those earlier risks. It provided the means for them
to swap and purchase pornography portraying children, as well as
interact with each other.

The first few sites revealed standard fare
about technology and gaming, but then Shad ran across something
that immediately raised the proverbial red flag.

Wally had a slew of foreign proxies at his
disposal. Proxies, which were also a hacker’s best friend, muddied
the trail if someone tried to trace the user’s activities. Shad’s
own warm relationship with them enabled him to fairly quickly pick
up on a trail which eventually led to what was known as a floating
site because it stayed at one address only temporarily, thus making
it harder to track. He was delayed for a few minutes because he had
to break the encryption for a password, but Shad finally got
in.

As soon as he saw the words on his computer
screen that touted childhood advocacy, Shad knew he’d struck the
mother lode.

It was one of those activist websites that
also operated as a message board. The language argued along a sort
of reverse logic. Shad read through several tracts purporting
arguments he was already familiar with.