Eternal War Rising to the South: The Beynok Vampire Series (3 page)

“Wait, Ambrose. It’s not like that.” There I went again, opening my big mouth, thinking something good was going to come out. “We love you, and we’ll see each other again. You and Sacha will rise full-spirited and stronger than ever.” He cringed when I said her name, but I kept going. “You’ll find each other and be happy again. I just know it. Everything will work out and be as it should be. You and her together, you’ll see.” I surprised myself because I didn’t put my foot in my mouth this time. I almost sounded like a believer in the whole partner bonding thing.

“You’re right,” he said. “Everything is as it should be. I love each one of you, and we’ll see one another again.” He smiled slightly. I saw Nickolai touch Nadia on the hand and gesture for her to follow Ambros, and she did. Nadia and Ambrose had become close over the years, and she was the best one to send to tend to him. It was definitely not me. I wouldn’t know if I should tell him to suck it up or cry with him.

Vladimir continued, “Considering the attack on our territory, everyone needs to be extremely cautious from now on. Russia is sending two guards to stay with every clan until we figure out what is going on and who was behind the attack. Irena and Boris are arriving tomorrow afternoon. They’re already on a plane.”

His words surprise me again.
Who was behind the attack?
What kind of question is that?
We already knew the werewolves attacked Misha’s home, didn’t we? What was really in the reports about the attack? Vladimir was not telling us everything. I could sense he was holding something back. This is bigger than the attack on Misha’s house…something strange is happening in the supernatural world and Vladimir is keeping it from us.
Why?
I don’t have much patience but I’ll have to use the little bit I do have because he’ll tell us what’s going on when he is ready and not a moment sooner.

I said goodnight and headed to bed. It was only three in the morning but my brain was tired of thinking and my body was strained from feeling everyone’s emotions, so I decided it was best to turn in for the night.

I stopped at Ambrose’s door. I wanted to go inside and console him. My heart ached for him and the pain he must feel from the loss of his partner. I placed my hand on his door and felt nothing but misery. Then I heard Ambrose say to Nadia, “Why? Why couldn’t they have let Sacha live instead of the youth they are sending as my replacement? Why?” I couldn’t handle this. He was filling my body with every emotion he had. My empathy for him brought me to tears, and when his emotions consumed me, I wanted to wail. It was as if I had become Ambrose. My body couldn’t handle that right now, and I was too tired to block him out. A hot shower and my bed were calling, so I sadly continued to my room.

I had curled into my favorite position. Half the sheets were between my legs and the other half over me. My arms looped around my pillow with my head nestled on top. The sun wasn’t fully up yet, but I could tell it was morning by the color of the blinds, a light shade of gray, casting a slight haze of smoky light through my room. That was the good part about waking up, the part where my memory was a little hazy and the only thing running through my brain was
Sleep … more sleep … I feel so comfortable right now … I just want to stay this way a little bit longer
. Then, wham, the stuff from last night hit me.

I lay still for a few seconds, letting my mind adjust to waking up, so I could let my surroundings in and sense the room. I wasn’t alone, but I wasn’t awake enough to figure if it was friend or foe. Looking over to my nightstand without moving, I suddenly realized my swords were in the bathroom. Not having my swords near was not something I did often.
Don’t panic, clear your head, wait to make your move.
Was it our turn to be slaughtered? Were the others already … was I to be the survivor to tell the story? Why was it waiting? Was this a dream? No, it wasn’t a dream. I could sense whatever it was better now, and it didn’t feel anything like I thought it would. A sense of remorse, sadness, and desire filled me. I cringed at the thought of the emotions I felt in the field last night. These weren’t the same feelings or at least they weren’t coming from the same source. I felt no lightning crashing into me this time, and I didn’t feel the same emotion in return as I had in that field last night.

I slowly sat up and turned in the direction the emotions were coming from and was surprised by the figure leaning against the wall. The outline of the tall, squared, firmly built body gave his identity away without my seeing his face. “Vladimir … What are you doing?” That was all I could get out. He walked forward into the haze slipping through the blinds. My eyes had time to adjust so I could see the serious look on his face. The tattoo on his neck only added boldness to his face. He walked closer to my bed and sat on the side nearest me. “Vladimir, please say something. Is everything all right with the others?”

Still nothing came out of his lips, but I felt his breath move across my face. In the past, I’d always felt him with his guard up. We never touched much. He always made sure of that, and when we did, I could always sense his guard. Now I knew why. I was feeling him for the first time with his guard completely down. The desire he had for me was impossible to describe fully in words. An overwhelming warm sensation filled my body. The hair on my arms stood straight up, and goose bumps started to appear. I closed my eyes for a brief second to try to understand the warmth of his rolling lust invading my body. “Vladimir,” was all I could say.

He moved closer; his lips opened, but still no words came out. His stare was burning so deeply into my eyes that I had to close them again and turn away. I felt his hand firmly slide on my cheek and turn my face back to his. He placed his lips on mine. I wasn’t quite sure what to do, I had never kissed a man before, not that I wanted to kiss Vladimir. His action took me by surprise. My lips naturally mirrored his as he guided my body into his. His long hair brushed my cheek. I felt wrapped inside his body, and it felt good. His soft full lips moved gracefully, but with full control, across mine, and it was hard not to fall into sync and feel safe. This took place for what felt like hours. I knew it had only been a minute because the light was still the same in the room when he pulled away from me, taking me from temptation to reality.

“What the hell are you doing? Please say something.” My voice trembled with confusion and anger. This couldn’t be happening.

He looked down at me for a while, and his face regained the same objective look he had before. “Anya, I love you,” he said. “I know what I’m about to tell you is not going to make sense to you right now, but this time, you have to love me in return. It’s your destiny to love me. It’s our destiny to be together.” I could almost sense a slight bit of anger now. “You’re going to have a choice to make soon, and I need you to make the right one.” His body was pleading with me as much as his words. “You need to choose the way of life you were made for. You need to choose the destiny … the future with me … the future to lead our kind … the future that is written for you.”

“I’ve already accepted my life for what it is, Vladimir. What do you mean you love me? That’s impossible. And what do you mean I have to make a choice?” I wanted to cry a little, but I was so angry with him that I couldn’t.

“Anya, everything will become clear to you soon. I just thought I had more time to convince you.” He paused, took a deep breath, and continued, “I talked to Yuri last night after everyone went to bed. He told me about your encounter in the field after the hunt. He told me about the hold it had on you and said he could smell something in the tree line. Yuri doesn’t know exactly what it was, but I do.”

He had a look of defeat for a moment, but he shook it off and moved closer. He went for my lips again. If it hadn’t been for all the questions I had, I might have let him kiss me again. I couldn’t lie to myself. His kiss was nice, but it didn’t feel exactly right. I am not sure how I feel about him.

With all my strength, I pulled my knees up to my chest and lunged my feet into his stomach. Before I could blink, he landed on the floor in a kneeling position, and I lunged off the bed and landed on my feet on the opposite side of the bed. We stood there in our fighting stances because this is what we were trained to do. Our eyes locked intensely.

“Anya, I love you. I will not fight you unless you choose a path that will force me to.” His own words upset him, I could tell.

“What do you mean? And since I don’t know what it was in the field, why don’t you tell me?” I relaxed, and so did he. I couldn’t believe it, but he walked toward me, encroaching on my personal space again.

“Anya, I’m not going to answer all of your questions. The answers will all come soon enough. For now, I want you to imagine yourself in love with me. Try to love me.”

He was close, as close to me as he was on the bed. He put one hand on my arm and the other around my waist. I couldn’t look into his eyes, maybe never again. I looked down at our feet. They were so close they were touching. His knees started to bend. What was he doing? I heard his voice as his face moved down to meet mine.

“Try, Anya. All I am asking of you today is that you try.” It was too late to move. He pulled me in and kissed me again. I didn’t resist. Surprising myself, I placed a hand around his neck, feeling the raised tattoo, and pulled him in deeper. The kiss was real, and his tongue was soft against mine. I could feel his body reacting to my acceptance. His lips moved, and I heard him whisper, “Please love me this time, please.”

I closed my eyes to try … to try to feel what it would be like to love Vladimir. I let go and fell deeper in the kiss. My mind went completely blank, and my body didn’t feel like my body. Where was I? Flashes of light intruded my mind, fast, faster, and then even faster, like a disco ball gone mad. Then the flashing became a sold light and then dimmed to a low haze. I could see myself. I was in the Altay Mountains in Russia near the Beynok mansion. I recognized the area from past visits. Vladimir was with me, and another figure was in front of us. It was my black silhouette from my dreams. I had both fear and compassion for the figure. It was saying, “Anya, I will not fight you, and I will never leave you. I love you; please believe me.” Vladimir took a fighting stance and jumped in front of me. Why? I could feel it was neither human nor Beynok. Why would I care about it? I came to. Vladimir was still on my lips as if I had never left.

“What the hell? What was that?” I meant to keep my reaction to the vision to myself, but it was too late. My skin felt pasty and sweat was running down the back of my neck. Neither my physical or verbal reaction was caused by the kiss. Why was I having visions of this unknown black figure?

Vladimir pulled away from me and asked, “What’s wrong, Anya?” I could sense his fear and curiosity. I could understand him having curious emotions, but the fear confused me. What did he know that he wasn’t telling me? He clearly knows who and what the black silhouette is.

“No! This is too much for me. If you care about me like you say you do, why can’t you tell me what is going on?” I pulled away from him and said, “I’m angry with you, Vladimir. You say you can’t tell me what’s going on, but I feel you’ve done nothing but give me riddles. You’re telling me you love me. How is that possible when you have had a partner and you are full spirited on your fourth rise? The emotions pouring out of you don’t make sense, love…lust…fear, fear of what? How am I going to be able to face you again once you leave this room? I don’t know how to deal with these kinds of emotions. I don’t know how to love and I don’t know what love is, but for some reason, I don’t picture love feeling like this.”

Vladimir shifted toward me and said, “You’re just confused right now. Time is the answer to your questions, Anya, and you don’t have much time. I only hope you make the right choices.” He started to walk toward the door. “It’s about time for the others to start to wake. Just keep all of this to yourself for right now. I’m sorry I had to do this so abruptly, but like I said before, I thought I had more time.” Right before he closed the door, he turned back toward me and said, “And yes, you do know what love feels like and I know you are capable of finding it with me if you would try.”

I couldn’t think straight. Nothing I was feeling made any sense to me. My head was spinning, and the room felt like it was tumbling in the opposite direction. I had to get out—out of the house and out of this moment, and fast. I threw on my jogging suit and running shoes. If anyone saw me, I thought I might break down, and I didn’t want that. What would I say? How could I explain why I looked like a mad woman? I left my room through the door to the balcony. I was lucky for two reasons: the balcony reached out past the porch below that wrapped around the first floor, and the back yard ran uphill, so the jump wouldn’t be too high for me. I had made jumps higher than this. I had to go and go fast.

Before I could second-guess what I was about to do, I jumped. I landed on all fours like a cat, sitting upright. We were trained well. Our instincts take over before we can think. I took off running, and I didn’t care about the direction. I ran for a long time. When I felt my body accept the pace and become comfortable, I pushed harder. I didn’t want any room for thought. I wanted freedom from my life and any emotions it held. I closed my mind to everything.

I knew I had run for a few hours because the sun was straight overhead. Slowing to a trot, I realized I didn’t recognize my surroundings, but I didn’t care. It felt so good to be outside alone with no emotions running through me. I stopped, took in a deep breath, and closed my eyes, exhaling as I opened them. Nothing. I felt nothing. It was late summer, and the temperature had to be around seventy degrees. My body’s core temperature felt like a hundred and fifty degrees. I was sweating and exhausted. I pulled my long-sleeved shirt off and tied it around my waist since I was wearing a tank top underneath. The cool breeze on my bare skin felt refreshing.

I came out of the woods at the bottom of the mountain where a small creek ran. The sound was peaceful and the temperature was so soothing I took my shoes off, pulled my pant legs up as far as I could, and walked into the water. I cupped my hands and drank. After my thirst was satisfied, I washed my face and arms. I needed to relax and take a break, so I sat by the side of the creek with my feet plunged in the water.

I knew I should be making my way back, but I didn’t want to. If Vladimir had wanted me back badly enough, he would have sent Yuri out to track me with his sense of smell. However, I didn’t think anyone was coming to look for me. Vladimir wouldn’t want to bring attention to the situation. I was alone, and it felt wonderful. Lying on the round rocks, I could smell the earth below. I listened to the whistle of the wind, as a breeze softly blew over my body, which was taking in all the energy it could from the sun. The water flowing over my feet brought a perfect balance to the temperature. I felt calm, at ease. I closed my eyes.

Just me, I told myself. It was just me for the first time. I was dreaming of only me and could see myself in Russia where our lords and many elders lived, not near the mansion in the Altay, but somewhere close. I could tell by the landscape and the crisp weather. I had been running again. Sweat covered my face and neck, and I was breathing hard. I looked upset, frustrated, and angry about something. It must have been me during my first rise to the east. We’re not supposed to remember anything about our past risings, but for some reason, I just knew it was me from my first rise.

The land was nearly flat with trees and snow all around and a few boulders sat here and there. If I looked hard enough between the trees, I could see a frozen lake in the distance. I was pacing in a small open area, almost as if I was waiting for something. The place was totally familiar, so I had most definitely spent time there. I couldn’t tell what I was waiting for or what was truly going on in my crazy head.

All of a sudden, there was another voice, a man’s voice. “Anya, I knew you would come. I knew one day you would come back to our place.”

I snapped around to face the voice, and it was the same, dark silhouette again.
This is unbelievable! There’s never a face with detail, just a blank figure of a male.
I saw my past self slowly turn with hesitation. I was standing between the past me and the black figure, so I took a few steps back and watched the scene play out like a movie.