Authors: K'wan
Evelyn sat on the edge of her bunk, finishing off the last of the five cornrows that snaked over her head. She was trying to focus on the braid and finish reading the copy of Tracy Brown's
Black
that she had borrowed from one of the other girls. She almost found herself crying as the main character's life had taken a turn for the worse, but she was too gangsta for that shit.
“Panelli!” barked the brutish-looking guard. She looked more like a gorilla than a lady. “Pack ya shit, bitch. Time to roll out.”
Evelyn looked up from her book and rolled her eyes. Normally she would've checked the dyke guard, but not today. It was one of those rare occasions when she decided to hold her tongue. She was being released that morning, so the minimum-wage slave could say whatever she wanted.
For the last five hundred and forty-seven days, she had made her home within the walls of DJF. It was one of the few female juvenile detention centers in the state of New York and one of the toughest. Evelyn had been laid up in the facility for about a year and a half. The gun that they had found in the car hadn't even been hers, but she wasn't going to tell the police that. Death before dishonor. That was how Twentys got down.
Evelyn gathered the last of her belongings and stuffed them into her duffel bag. She made her way around the dorm, giving “dap” to some of the girls that she was cool with. Some of the other women shot her jealous glares but didn't bother to say anything. Evelyn had proven to the other girls there that you don't fuck with Eve.
Old Pete came down the walkway, pushing his broom, sweeping up dirt that wasn't there. Pete was a local from a nearby town. He was also a career criminal who couldn't seem to get it right, and a degenerate dope fiend. Pete was one of the few men who worked in the facility. Some of the girls would let Pete sleep with them for small favors or extra privileges. Eve didn't get down like that. Pete had come at her once and she almost caught another charge. Since then she hadn't had a problem out of him.
Eve had been getting propositions from men since she was a young girl and just didn't want to hear it. Most of the time they were crass with their come-ons, and others were just perverse. But this was the price she paid for being beautiful. When she had first arrived at the facility there were a few incidents where some of the less attractive girls tested her. They soon found out that her pretty face came with a devastating right hook.
“What up, girl?” Pete asked, scratching his razor-bumped face.
“Ain't nothing,” Eve said flatly, busying herself with her bag.
“So they're letting you outta here?” Pete asked, prying further.
“Seems that way, Pete.”
“So,” Pete said propping his broom against the door frame. “What you gonna do when you get back into the world?”
“Can't call it.” She shrugged. “Try to live my life. That's all.”
“Sure ya right, kid. So you gonna hook up with Felon and them when you get out? Maybe get into some of the rackets?”
“Who's Felon?” Eve asked, faking ignorance.
“Come on, Eve,” Pete said, leaning in closer. “I ain't the police. You ain't gotta lie to me.”
“I'm serious, Pete. I don't know nobody named Felon and I don't know what rackets you're talking about. When I hit the streets, I'm gonna try and get a job or something.”
Pete must've thought that because Eve was young, she was born yesterday. Eve was hip to how Pete was getting down. She had gotten it through the grape vine that Pete was a “switch hitter.” He was one of those cats that would pump the unsuspecting inmate for information and then trade it to the brass for dope or favors. Nope, Eve wasn't getting caught out there.
“Job my ass,” Pete exclaimed. “You're one of the top chicks in Twenty-Gang. I heard about you on the streets, kid. They say that Evelyn Panelli, aka Eve, is one bad lady. She's always ready to get down, be it with fist or iron. The way I hear it, the streets respect ya gangsta. Not bad for a chick.”
“Listen,” she said, a little irritated. “That was a long time ago. I ain't wit all that shit no more. As a matter of fact, I'm feeling a little uncomfortable with your line of questioning. Why don't you ease the fuck back?” She looked him dead in the eye.
Pete thought about pressing the issue, but changed his mind when he saw the murderous look that she was giving him. Mr. Thompson, who was the director of the facility, had promised Pete an eighth of dope if he could get some dirt on the young Evelyn. He had a hard-on for the girl. Pete decided that the drugs he was promised wasn't worth getting his ass kicked or cut. Eve was quite the lethal beauty.
“My bad,” Pete said, retrieving his broom. “Didn't know you were gonna get all sensitive about it.”
“Ain't nothing,” Eve said easily. “I just don't like people all up in my mix. That's all.”
“Break this shit up,” the lady guard said. “Panelli, you've got thirty seconds to get your shit and roll out. Unless you wanna stay?”
“Nah,” she said throwing her duffel bag over her shoulder. “I'm outta here.” Eve took one last look at the place that had been her home for what seemed like forever and was gone.
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Eve followed the guard down the walkway through the different sections of the facility. She nodded at certain inmates but didn't bother to stop. As she passed through the section of the facility that served as solitary, she was suddenly halted by the sound of someone calling her name from behind one of the iron doors. Eve recognized the voice, but she knew she had to be mistaken.
“Scruggs?” she questioned, moving closer to the gate. Scruggs was a kid Eve used to go to school with. He ran with a local Blood click on her block. Even though the ladies of Twenty-Gang weren't actually a gang like the Bloods and the Crips, she and her home girls had love for the color-clad hardheads from the block. They didn't give a shit about a color. They were just some cool-ass neighborhood guys. A few of the girls were even in relationships with some of the bangers.
Scruggs was short, with a baby face. He was young, but his eyes were those of an old man. Most striking thing about him was the radiant smile that he used to hit all the girls with, the same smile that he was flashing at Eve from the six-by-six cell.
“What's good?” Scruggs asked from behind the little grated window.
“Gimmie a second,” Eve said to the lady guard. The guard held up one finger to let Eve know that she had one minute. “What up, my nigga?” she asked, putting her fist to crisscrossing wires.
“Trying to live,” he replied solemnly. “But I don't seem to be doing a very good job of it.”
“I guess didn't nobody tell you that this was a lady's facility?” Eve joked.
“Very funny, girl. Nah, you know they had me housed a few miles from here and shit. A nigga got into something with a heavy hitter and they moved me up outta the jail. Talking some safety shit. He fucked up, and I'm still walking 'round. Niggaz ain't hard like we, ma. I'll only be here till tomorrow, then I'm shipping further up. They're keeping me caged for my whole visit.”
“What the fuck happened?”
“Man, this crab nigga tried to come at me sideways. Eve baby, you know the kid ain't no troublemaker, but I ain't have a whole lot of choices. Son came and I laced him. I carved into that boy over and over. I swung that blade until my arms got tired. The fucked-up part wasâ¦I did it more out of fear than anything else.”
“Damn, kid.” Eve sighed. “Homey died?”
“Dead as a fucking doornail, ma.”
“So what's the word?”
“The word is, I'm fucked. When the bulls rolled in, I was still holding the shank.”
“You gonna try to fight it?”
“Fight it,” Scruggs said with a grim look on his face. “Baby-girl, I'm already in on a body. They're probably gonna try and fry me behind this shit.”
“What about fam and them,” Eve asked referring to Scruggs' gang. “Them niggaz ain't trying to put no money up for your lawyer?”
“Fuck them niggaz,” Scruggs said. “I blame all of that dumb shit for getting me into this.”
“You're talking crazy now,” she said in disbelief. “That's ya click. How you gonna kick shit on em?”
“Let me put you up on something, ma. We ain't that far apart in age, but I've been at this a lot longer than you have. All that shit they kick in the hood is garbage. Don't get me wrong, there's quite a few dawgz that keep it funky, but the majority of them niggaz ain't keeping it gangsta.”
“It can't be that bad, man.”
“Eve, them niggaz shitted on me when I got bagged. I ain't get no visits, no packages, no letters. Not a goddamn thing. And the punch line is, I caught my case for the set. Me and that boy didn't even know each other well enough to dislike one another. Our only crimes were being from opposite sides of the color lines. This shit all chalks up to belonging. I did it all to belong.”
“Don't give up, Scruggs,” she pleaded. “You can get up outta this. I mean, even if you do get a lil more time on top of that you're still young. You couldâ”
“Fuck that,” he said cutting her off. “Eve, I ain't built for the kinda time they're gonna try to give me. I'd go crazy. They got my back against the wall, ma. Just because they got me on some holdover shit in a woman's facility, don't mean I'm going out like a bitch.”
“Don't start talking, Scruggs. What're you thinking about doing?”
“The only thing I can do,” he said getting misty-eyed. “One of the home girls managed to slip me a lil something in here. It ain't much, but it's got a point on it. When they open this cage in the morningâ¦I'm coming from the chest!” he declared.
Eve had to compose herself before she continued speaking. “That's a lot to swallow. You sure you wanna do this?”
“As sure as I can be. I was born in the system and this is where I'm gonna close my eyes. Straight like that. When they pop open this door in the morning, I'm gonna poke the first nigga that steps in here. Tell the whole hood, Eve. Tell them that I went out like a soldier.”
“Let's go, Panelli,” the lady guard said, getting impatient.
Eve spared a last glance at Scruggs and continued on her walk. She felt a tear roll down her cheek as she heard Scruggs bellowing in the background,
“Tell em I went out like a muthafucking soldier!”
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Eve continued to follow the female officer down the hall to freedom. It seemed as though the closer she got to the gates, the heavier her legs got. She had itched for this day every night in her dorm; now it seemed to be at hand. Just as she exited the solitary area her face took on a sudden change. She sucked her teeth and rolled her eyes as she stood face-to-face with Mr. Thompson, a short white man whose hairline seemed to be running away from his forehead. He stood there with a smug grin on his face, wearing the same brown suit that he wore every Thursday.
“Ms. Panelli,” Thompson said, smiling. “Today is the big day, huh?”
“Yeah,” Eve said. “I'm finally getting out.”
“So you are. And what are your plans now that you're a
free woman?
”
“Don't know right off,” Eve said with a shrug. “Got a few ideas that I've been kicking around.”
“Umm umm,” Thomson said, examining Eve over the rim of his round spectacles. “A wise man once said that too much free time is a dangerous thing.”
“Yeah, well, I ain't never heard that one and frankly, it don't apply to me. All I'm trying to do is keep from landing myself back in a shit hole like this. Or worse.”
“Indeed, Ms. Panelli. But what I've learned in my years as an overseer is that people like you have a hard time staying out of trouble.”
“What do you mean by people like me?” Eve asked with an attitude.
“Ms. Panelli,” Thomson said, matching her attitude. “I think you know just what I mean. You and those like you are animals. You murder and commit other acts of violence all in the name of corners and streets that none of you own, just to turn around and tear them down. How ridiculous. I guess that's what you folks call
keeping it real?
”
“Is this conversation going anywhere, yo?”
“Yes,” Thompson said, in a matter-of-fact tone. “I don't like you, Evelyn. I don't like people like you or what you stand for. You're a blight on society. I know about your background and what happened to your family, but that's still no excuse. You're dangerous. Young, Black, and no respect for human life. But luckily for me, you're an ignorant bitch. If you had an education you'd be downright threatening.”
“Fuck you,” Eve hissed. “I did my muthafucking time, straight gangsta. Ain't shit you can tell me, cracker. I ain't even got to listen to this shit.”
“Oh, I'm afraid you do. See, technically you're not a free woman yet. If I wanted to fuck you all I have to do is shuffle your paperwork. Yeah, I could keep your ass here for at least another week. A rather unpleasant week at that, shit-bird. Think about how you wanna play it.”
Eve could feel sweat break out on her forehead. Thompson was counting on her ill temper to be her undoing. All she could think of was crushing Thompson's skull with her bare hands. Not today, though. Freedom was more important than old grudges. Scores could be settled later.
“Just as I thought,” Thompson said smugly. “Take a walk, convict.” As Eve walked toward the last gate Thompson stopped her short. “Eveâ¦see ya soon.”
Eve flexed her hands as she approached the iron gate to freedom. It was as if her legs were going to give out as she moved through the intake area. She looked at the guards scattered about the lobby and office areas. They all seemed to be staring at her mockingly. Eve couldn't help but think someone was going to block her exit and inform her of a new pending charge. Through the grace of a higher power she was permitted to make it to the exit. As she stood on the threshold, one of the male guards blew her a kiss. She smiled, flipped him the finger, and stepped through the last barrier to freedom.