Even Now (11 page)

There was.

After another few seconds, her mother said, “So what did he say? I mean, did he leave a message?”

“He told my secretary his name was Shane Galanter, and he was looking for Bill Anderson.” A long sigh came from her father. “I’d already told her that if anyone named Galanter called, she was to say they had the wrong bank. No one there by my name.”

Her mother groaned. “The kids miss each other, Bill. What if we’re wrong?”

“We’re protecting Lauren.” Her father was curt, adamant. “It’s for her own good, because I love her. Besides, she’ll never find out.”

“Yes, I will.” Lauren stepped into the room, still holding onto the door frame to keep her balance. Her head pounded, and she could barely feel her feet. She stared from her mother to her father, her eyes wide, unblinking. “I heard it all, Daddy. Shane called you at work and you had some . . . some woman tell him he had the wrong bank.” She wanted to scream at him, shout at both of them that they couldn’t do this. But it was already done. All that was left inside her was an eerie sort of iciness, an anxiety that defied expression.

“Lauren — ” Her father was on his feet. His mouth hung open for a few seconds. But he rebounded quickly. “The two of you need time away from each other. The Galanters and we agreed. It’s important, so the two of you can figure out what you want from here.”

“We already
know
what we want.” She was imploding, her voice fading with every few words. “You and Mom don’t have any idea what I want.” She pressed her hand to her chest. “What Shane and I want. We need to be together.”

“Okay.” Her father looked across the room.

As if on cue, her mother turned to Lauren. “We’ll help you find him, honey. It won’t be hard. Your father has ways.” She paused. “It’s like your dad said. We all felt it would be best if we gave the two of you some time apart. If you could’ve heard the things Mrs. Galanter said about you, honey . . . ”

“I don’t care about her. I care about Shane.” Her voice was getting louder, and she brought it back down again. “All you’ve done is tear us apart.”

“We were trying to help you.”

“The phone connection thing, the made-up forwarding information, and now this — Shane calls the bank and gets a lie.” She laughed, but it came out low and sad. “Thanks for the help, Mom.” She looked at her father. “You too, Dad.” She turned to walk out, but her mother was on her feet, crossing the room and coming toward her.

“Where are you going?”

Lauren was done sharing information with her parents. “My room.” She looked at her mother over her shoulder. “I have nothing left to say.”

Her parents must’ve felt the same way, because they didn’t speak another word as she walked away. Not until she was in the hallway did she hear her mother’s voice. “I’m sorry, Lauren. We . . . we never meant to hurt you.”

She stopped and closed her eyes for a few seconds, holding back the sudden rush of tears that stung at her eyes. “I know.” She blinked and looked back at them one last time. “I know.”

As she made her way through the house and up the stairs to her room, she was certain her mother was telling the truth. In some strange, twisted way the things she and her father had done to keep her and Shane apart really were acted out with the thought that it would be best for her.

But some part of their consciences must’ve known it was wrong. She sat on the edge of her bed and looked across the room at Emily’s crib. The baby stirred and gave a small sneeze.

Lauren stood and went to her. “Hey, little one, you okay? Mommy’s here.” She leaned out and touched her forehead. It was warm, but that might’ve been from the blankets or the sticky summer night. Lauren frowned and adjusted the layers so the baby had less over her body.

The most amazing thing about being a new mother was the intensity of the love she felt for her daughter. She would’ve done anything for little Emily, and come tomorrow she would prove it. She soothed her hand over Emily’s forehead again. She wasn’t that warm, after all. “Everything’s going to be okay.”

She should’ve been furious with her parents, devastated by their betrayal, fighting mad about everything that had happened to Shane and her. Instead, as she stared at her daughter, she felt a surging sense of freedom. She and Emily would be fine on their own.

She leaned over the crib and kissed her daughter on the cheek. Then she went to the top drawer in her nightstand and pulled out the envelope just inside. It held five thousand dollars, money she’d taken from her personal account that afternoon. Since her money was still at the bank in the city, she’d found a local branch first. Her mother thought she was running to the grocery store with Emily, but she stopped at the bank on her way home. It was her money, gifts she’d gotten over the years, money she’d earned babysitting. Some of it was from her parents, but only when it was given as a birthday or Christmas present or for getting A’s on her report card.

Now it felt like a million dollars in her hands. With that kind of cash she could take Emily to Los Angeles, find someplace to live, and start searching for Shane. She would try the local banks, places where his father might work. Then once school started again, she would try every high school in Los Angeles if she had to. Her parents would get over her decision. She’d done the unforgivable. By getting pregnant she and Shane had cast a shadow of shame on their families too long and dark and wide to ever step out of. The only way she’d live in the light of happiness and freedom again was by finding Shane.

As she fell asleep, she heard Emily sneeze twice more. Nothing to worry about. Just a small case of the sniffles, probably something all little babies dealt with in the first few months of life. And if she came down with a real full-blown cold, they could stop at any supermarket along the way to California and find something to help her.

The next morning Lauren’s father left early, without saying good-bye. Her mother checked in and reported that she was spending the day with the interior decorator.

“We’re accessorizing today. Looking at a few of the local boutiques.” Her mother gave her a tentative smile. “You’re not still upset about your father’s situation at the bank, are you?” She paused, the corners of her lips locked in an upward lift. “You and Shane will connect one of these days real soon. We’ll help you.”

“How, Mom?” She had Emily cradled in her arms. Her suitcases were packed and in the closet. “I don’t have his phone number, and he doesn’t have mine.” She narrowed her eyes. “Where exactly does he live? Do you know that?”

Her mother’s shoulders lowered a little. “Los Angeles. That’s all they told me.”

“Okay, what about his dad’s business? He had investments in LA, so what are they?
Where
are they?”

“Gas stations, I think. And a small airport, maybe.” She bit her lip. “At least I think so.”

“You see?” She made a sound that was part laugh, part moan. “Why say we’ll connect soon? Shane found Daddy’s bank, which is pretty good with nothing to go on, don’t you think?”

Her eyes fell to the floor, but she nodded. “Yes. Yes, it was.”

“So he found it, and then someone tells him it’s not the right bank. No one there by the name of Bill Anderson.” She kept her voice calm so it wouldn’t wake Emily. “What makes you think I’ll be able to find Shane now?”

A pair of robins sang from a tree outside her window. Her mother looked up and gave the slightest shrug. “I’ve been asking myself the same thing all night.” She hugged her arms tight around her waist. “Honestly, Lauren, I don’t know. I have to believe he’ll find you, but I don’t know how.”

“Maybe if our phone number was listed.” She hated the sarcasm in her voice. It made her feel ugly and jaded, like a world of distance lay between her and her mom.

“Lauren — ” her mother sighed — “you know we can’t list our number, not with your dad’s involvement at the bank. We’ve never been listed, and neither have the Galanters.”

It was all she needed to hear. She had to go to Shane. Whether he was in California or on the moon, she had to find him. She held Emily closer. “I love you, Mother, and I always will.” Her voice cracked. “But I can’t believe what you and Daddy have done to me.”

Her mom came to her then and placed her arms around Lauren and Emily, holding them tight. When she drew back, she looked deep into her eyes, “I love you too, honey. I’m sorry. Really.”

She turned and walked away. When Lauren heard the front door close behind her, she stood and set Emily down in her crib. With her heart in her throat, she added a few more items to each suitcase. All of Emily’s clothes, and more than enough for herself.

As she left the room, a suitcase in each hand, she stopped and looked back. She scanned the room, taking in her box of short stories and photo albums, her yearbooks and souvenirs from a childhood that ended far too quickly. She could always come back for those things once she found Shane.

The only memento she packed was a framed photograph of her and Shane, something she would set next to her bed so that wherever the next place was she called home, she would be driven every day to find him.

Only then would she send for the rest of her things.

She packed the car with the suitcases, then came back for Emily. She left a note in Emily’s crib that said simply, “Gone to meet Shane. I’ll call when I find him. Love, Lauren.”

By four that afternoon they were three hundred miles out of Wheaton. Everything ahead of her looked bright and promising. The sky was clear, the map on the seat beside her had the route marked out perfectly. A woman at the local auto club had helped her with the best possible freeways and stopping points. She would get to California in six days and after that she’d find Shane and they could be together. Only one thing caused her even an inkling of doubt.

In the backseat, Emily was still sneezing.

S
omething tragic had happened.

By six o’clock that night, Angela Anderson was sure of it. She called Bill at the bank and struggled to keep the panic from her voice. “Have you seen Lauren?”

“Lauren?” His tone told her he was busy. “Of course not. She’s home with the baby. You know that.”

“She’s not here, Bill. I think she’s gone.”

“If she’s not there, then of course she’s gone.” His impatience grated on her. “Honey, I’m in a meeting. She’s probably at the store, and she’ll be back in a few minutes.”

“What if . . . what if she’s gone?”

“Gone where?”

“Gone
gone
. I think she left, maybe to find Shane.” Angela’s voice was controlled, but only barely. “She didn’t leave a note, not one that I could find. I looked in her room, every where.”

He uttered an exaggerated sigh. “She’s out shopping.”

“I thought of that, but Bill, I’ve been home for an hour. She wouldn’t be gone this long.” She hesitated. “I have a bad feeling.”

“All right, well listen.” There was kindness in his voice now. “Why don’t you check her room again and see what you can find. This is Lauren we’re talking about, honey. She wouldn’t do anything crazy.”

A sense of peace washed over her. Bill was right. Lauren was grounded. Before getting pregnant, she’d been a standout student, a kid who always told them where she was; one who preferred staying home and playing Scrabble and Hearts with her parents and Shane rather than hitting a high school party.

Of course she wouldn’t just take Emily and leave.

Still, just to be sure, she needed to check her room one more time. She hurried up the stairs, a sick feeling in her heart. She pulled Lauren’s door open and scanned the bed. This time she saw something she hadn’t before. Lauren’s photo of herself and Shane, which always sat on her bedside table, was gone. Angela looked at the crib again. The bedding was gone too. The first time she’d checked Lauren’s room she’d assumed the baby’s sheets and blankets were being washed. Her heart beat hard in her throat. What if the bedding was missing for another reason? She moved in closer, her steps slow and fearful.

On the mattress lay a piece of paper, something else she hadn’t seen her first time up.

Angela’s heart screamed at her to leave the room, run back downstairs and convince herself that Lauren and Emily were only at the store, that they hadn’t gone farther away than that. But the note demanded her attention. She forced her feet to take her to the edge of the crib, and then without drawing another breath she lifted the note and read it.

Gone to meet Shane. I’ll call when I find him. Love
,
Lauren.

A burning sensation flooded her veins, a mix of adrenaline and fear all wrapped up in a shock that wouldn’t let her believe her own eyes. “No . . . ” Even as she spoke, she read the words again, then one more time. “No, Lauren.
No!”
Her hand shook so hard she could barely make out the words.

What was Lauren thinking? She and Emily wouldn’t last on a trip across the country by themselves. Lauren had never driven more than an hour or two at any one time. She was only seventeen! How would she know which freeways to take or how to make it from Chicago to Los Angeles?

Angela wasn’t sure whom to call first. The note clutched in her hand, she raced down the stairs. Bill. He had to know before anyone else. She had to dial his number three times before getting it right. She had him on the line in less than a minute.

“So — ” Angela heard the nervous tension in his voice — “is she home?”

Angela dropped to the nearest chair and grabbed a handful of her hair.
Think! Say something.
She squeezed the receiver and found her voice. “She’s gone. She and Emily. I found a note.”

“A note?” She had his attention now. She heard a door shut in the background. “What did it say?”

“She’s gone to California to find Shane. She’ll call when she gets hold of him.”

He made a disbelieving sound. “That’s ridiculous, Angela. She’s just a child. She doesn’t have any idea how to drive across the country.”

“Or how to care for little Emily.”

“I’ll be right home. You call the police, and tell them what happened.” He was in a hurry now, anxious to fix the problem. “And pray, Angela. I can’t have anything happen to her.” A catch sounded in his voice. “I can’t have it.”