Extol of Agnatic Dreams (The Extol Series Book 1) (14 page)

Even after this conversation, he still planned to sleep with her. Evangeline shook her head slowly at the reality of her situation and had no idea how to proceed. She did not want Glais to know that he had been found out, but how could she fake it come morning when they faced each other again. Evangeline knew Kyleigh was expecting her at dinner but that would not be happening now. Baxter said that Glais and Quintus avoided meals whenever possible, but she couldn’t risk it. Evangeline simultaneously wanted to confront him and never seen him again. Even if he did not arrive at the dinner table, how could she look at Kyleigh and pretend that all was well?

Glais seemed to be taking his time unloading the horses, but he did not brush them down. The stable boy could do that when he returned. Walking back towards the main doors, he paused outside the dapple grey horses stall, noticing the gate was open a little. Frowning he looked in and saw Evangeline sitting in the straw.

Their eyes met, hers were red and the grip around her knees seemed to be the only thing that was holding her together. He froze, his heart leaping as he realised she had heard the entire exchange between himself and Luella. Glais opened his mouth to speak but there were no words that would lend themselves to a genuine apology. Unsure what he should do, Glais nodded stiffly at her. What she must be thinking he could only guess. There was no accusation or even a hint of anger in Evangeline’s features. She was only hurt which made Glais feel worse. He ran his tongue over his lips but there were no words. After a moment he backed out of the stall, closing it behind him so the horse would not get out.

Evangeline stayed frozen there in the horse’s stall until she heard Glais’ footsteps carry him out of the building. He did not apologise, or offer any words of kindness. Could Evangeline forgive him for this if Glais had offered to explain it? Perhaps he loved this Luella, although she dismissed that possibility quickly after the things he had said and done to her. Clearly there was no love between them. He had sounded angry with her, not happy to see her. This was not love, but rather a sexual connection that Evangeline could not hope to understand.

The worst thing for Evangeline to admit was that Glais knew she had heard and had offered her no comfort. Perhaps that hurt her more than the knowledge did. With only herself to rely on, Evangeline sat in the barn stall crying as quietly as she could manage until it seemed there were no more tears to be shed. That was when she realised that she was no longer alone, but Thomas stood there, dressed in the same Braykith uniform as when they first met, but not that same cocky smile.

“Evangeline?” He did not open the gate or intrude on her little world of grief. He had been tempted to walk away after discovering her in the stables. Dealing with emotions was not his strong point, and he was still cautious of her after their run in at the carriage exchange. He couldn’t leave her, though, and so he had stayed and now felt stupid for doing so. “Can I do anything for you?”

Evangeline wiped her hand on her nose, sniffing hard and shaking her head. Thomas offered her a handkerchief and when she reached for it only then did he let himself in. Evangeline wiped her face on the fabric before blowing her nose. “Do you often carry one of these?” she asked. It seemed like an odd thing for a soldier to have.

“Standard issue.” Thomas joked awkwardly, offered her his hand and she hesitated. Evangeline could not deal with the same level of interaction he had shown her last time they met. She wished for nothing more than to be left alone. Seeming to read her, Thomas offered her a small smile. “I apologise for my behaviour in the woods. I acted outside my duties and I allowed my personal feelings interfere with my work. Please, let me help you up.” Evangeline sighed and finally submitted to him, rising from the ground.

She felt weak but was glad when she managed to stand alone even if she was leaning against the wooden planks that made the stall walls for support. “Thank you.” She kept his handkerchief and let herself be lead out of the stable. She paused before the dapple grey horse. “Who does it belong to?” she asked Thomas, her voice so quiet, she thought for a moment he didn’t hear her but it seemed he was thinking.

“She belongs to no one I believe, but you might want to check with the stable boy. I haven’t seen her before tonight.” Which did not mean much since he rarely came to these stables, but Thomas was offering Evangeline all the information he had.

“I want her.” She decided on an impulse she didn’t usually give into.

“Is that why you were crying? She reminds you of your horse back home?” Thomas asked.

Evangeline paused, missing a step and quickly recovering as Thomas gave her a fine excuse for her emotional state of being. “There is much about Braykith that I do not understand, much more that makes me feel alienated. She welcomed me.” Evangeline looked back over her shoulder the horse now watching her leave. “Actually, she ignored me completely until she thought I had a treat.”

“I’ll leave a message to the stable boy if you like.” Thomas offered, relieved to know it was nothing more than the stress of the move that had broken her so utterly. When he had come upon her, she seemed heartbroken and struck numb. She would not respond but sat there staring at the wall as if there was no horse in there with her at all. She appeared to Thomas as if she was sleeping with her eyes wide open, her breath panicked and her own nails biting into her skin. Thomas had been afraid to know what kind of news could make someone act in such a manner.

Now, he felt he understood her a little better.

E
vangeline’s shoes clicked on the stones of the castle. There was no charm to it now, and already she had come to realise that the longer she stayed here, the less magical and otherworldly Braykith seemed. It had been barely a full day and she was already tired of the sights. The fog was back, spots appearing in her eyes but she paid them no mind as she forced herself onwards. She had one location she needed to be and while Evangeline had never been to Glais’ rooms somehow, she seemed to know exactly how to find it.

She had hesitated for only the barest of seconds before she pushed the door open to find Glais and Luella in an unambiguous embrace. The afterglow of sex, or what she assumed was the afterglow because really what could Evangeline know of such behaviours, was still apparent on Luella’s face. Glais held the servant wench but was watching Evangeline. She had never seen him look so wild before. His hair was free to fall carelessly over his face, however his eyes pierced her still just as they had the first night they had met. If he meant to scare her off, it wouldn’t happen. She had no plans of leaving before she got her revenge.

Thomas walked quietly beside her with only the best of intentions of delivering Evangeline to her room. He could tell that she was troubled, and yet he lacked the knowledge on how best to handle this situation. A small allowance on the young man’s part that Evangeline gave no indication of the thoughts of her own mind, and Thomas could not bring himself to ask. and she couldn’t offer him a word as the scenario kept flashing past her eyes. Evangeline could not go to dinner, and she did not try and communicate with Wick when Thomas left her at her door. Evangeline blamed the sunburn and it was a convenient excuse for her to stay locked in her room. Many times she had imagined the scenario of confronting Glais and his infidelity. It changed slightly but every time she was a force to reckon with. The reality was much quieter. She did not confront Glais on his actions. She did not hunt down the girl to have her thrown from the castle.

She did not remove the ring from her hand either. Evangeline was still fully dressed for the day but lay on her bed with her hand above her head so she could see the ring Glais had presented her with. She stared up into the onyx and she tried very hard to find that hatred she knew she should feel but it didn’t come. What Evangeline felt was betrayal, but there was no following shot of hate to give her fire. She had experienced her moment in the barn where Evangeline had imploded because she would never be so aggressive in her real life regardless of how Evangeline imagined it, and now she was lost as to what to do.

Evangeline sat up but paused. There was no letter she could write that would be safe. Should it fall into the wrong hands, it would be a terrible thing. Infidelity was common in court, but never with so much evidence of it. Even if she could trust a messenger to get to Crimah and deliver the letter to Viviana and Teagan, their reply would be dated before they even read it. New tears threatened, the tears of a lonely woman. Wiping angrily at her eyes Evangeline cleared her throat. “Wick. Come to me.” Her voice sounded broken and seemingly underused, cracking even though she was trying to be strong.

Wick approached, opening the door that separated the sleeping quarters from the sitting room. In one hand she carried a small bowl with something sticky and green in it.

“What is that?” Evangeline asked, but of course, Wick gave her no answer, not even a mime for the concoction she was preparing. Evangeline sighed. “Help me dress in my night clothes. I wish to retire early.” Wick set the bowl down, not even nodding and just started working. Her face a blank stare, eerie still and so unsettling for Evangeline to witness. She had to admit defeat and go to staring at the wall instead of watching how Wick moved around her.

She gave no warning but when Evangeline stood nude, she fetched the bowl, dipping two fingers into it.

Evangeline took a step backwards. “No. Whatever it is I don’t want it.” She said but Wick ignored her. “Can you not hear me?” Evangeline almost felt feverish with Wick and her inability to speak. It was a choice, and that only made it all the worse for Evangeline to deal with. “Stop it, Wick.” Evangeline demanded, but Wick’s hands were faster than her blocking and she smeared the green goo on her red arm. Instantly her skin felt cooler and Evangeline looked down at the spot, amazed.

“Wick, you should just tell me.” Wick looked up at her and applied more of the extract to her arm, saying nothing as was her way and still giving little indications of her desires non-verbally. “I should just trust you.” Evangeline sighed, letting Wick now apply what as in her bowl over her sunburn. “You are one more thing about Braykith that makes no sense to me. Will that mystery ever end Wick?” Wick gave no answer but Evangeline kept speaking.

“It has been but a day, not even yet a full cycle and here I am a mess. I have found out things that both hurt me and somehow enhance my life. I have seen beauty and felt the cold touch of fear. Everything here makes me nervous. Will it someday become the norm? One morning I will wake and you will present me with a Braykith secret that I welcome without a fight?” Wick gave her nothing and Evangeline sighed.

The bowl was close to empty now, but it didn’t seem to matter because Evangeline had it covering every burn she had on her body. She couldn’t move, and her body itched but she didn’t say so as Wick disappeared and returned with ribbons of fabric. Evangeline didn’t ask and Wick didn’t even demonstrate to her what they were for. She just started wrapping them over her exposed skin, covering her.

Wick left Evangeline again and this time, she did not return. Wick put the unused strips of fabric away knowing she would need to use them again since Evangeline did not seem to realise how sensitive her skin was to the sun here. Being prepared will help in the future. If Evangeline would just stop with her resistance to Braykith and accept that Wick was there to assist her living routine, then everything would go much smoother. None of these thoughts showed on her as she went through the motions of preparing the bath.

Although Evangeline had not told Wick what was wrong, the girl had reason to believe that the sunburn excuse was simply that. An excuse used to avoid the family dinner. It was a wild guess, but Wick was confident that Evangeline had discovered some evil secret of Braykith and was still dealing with that. Although Wick was just as sure that it was only the beginning. There were far worse things to know. Evangeline’s skin was blushed pink but it was hardly the worst burn she had seen. Wick was sure after only one bath that most of the sting would be gone and the colour a faint glow.

As the tub grew warmer, Wick added some oils and a dried herbal remedy. Wick didn’t like tormenting Evangeline with her silence and she was well aware that it did leave the other woman out of sorts, but there was nothing to be done about it. If she started giving Evangeline gestures towards what she thought, then perhaps, it could all finish before it started. Wick had a responsibility to herself to keep her thoughts private. She was empathetic that Evangeline needed to learn how to handle her, but not sorry enough to change that.

She knew the moment Evangeline entered the room, felt eyes on her back as she ensured the herbs and oils dissolved in the water. Wick did not turn, and there was no shift in her stance as Evangeline approached. Satisfied with the water temperature, Wick helped the bandaged Evangeline get into the bath and made sure all of her was submerged. The water needed to soak into the bandages, and she took the time now to pin up Evangeline’s hair to keep it from getting too wet. She had no problems with using the coals again but overuse could ruin the hair.

“How do you know Glais?” Evangeline’s question was spoken so quietly that Wick scarcely thought she heard it at all. There was no competing sound beyond the crackle of the slowly dying fire but Evangeline knew the subject was a delicate one and she hoped her tone was respectful. True to form, Wick hid her reaction to the question. There was no change in her. Her eyes didn’t move from their fixated stare. Wick’s hands worked without faltering. She stood half hunched because of the height of the bath and she struggled some days with her posture but Wick was a master at hiding this from those around her. “His mother claims you grew up together, barely months between your ages.”

Wick let the silence stretch out between them, taking Evangeline’s hand out of the bath water and started slowly running her hands over the soaked bandages. Small circular motions pushed the water out and ensured that the balm was being absorbed into Evangeline’s skin. Feeling the familiar slide of bandage over the skin, Wick started working on removing the bandages slowly.

“If you don’t tell me, Wick, I am going to find out anyway. I thought you would want the opportunity to speak.” Evangeline’s threat seemed to just fall on deaf ears even though Wick was very aware of not only her words but the growing tension between them. She wouldn’t be the first person who tried to make the mute girl talk. Wick believed Evangeline when she said she would find out, but that did not make Wick want to share it. In time, all of it would be told to Evangeline. Perhaps then she would better understand her self-appointed silence.

It all meant nothing to Wick because there was no way for her to change the way her life was now, and clearly no one was too concerned with letting her live out her days in servitude. After what she had witnessed with Glais, finding out the truth behind the crown, Wick would never speak again. She had paid her price to Braykith and she was well aware that her life could have been much worse than it was.

She wore the effects of the royal legacy every day and knew that people who remembered her avoided her now. There were those who were new to the castle and they would stand there and look at her for too long because she made people uncomfortable. Wick was aware of her skeletal frame and sunken eyes made her seemingly frail to the slightest breeze although the opposite was true. She was short and she appeared to shuffle instead of walk. Growing up had been tough for Wick and silence was her only reward. It kept her safe because people knew that Quintus was not above removing those with a loose tongue. Daily she was witnessed by the castle staff and still she was yet to see justice for what had been done to her. Fear for her life kept her silent for years, and it remained that way as finally Evangeline relaxed and gave up on her.