Facing Redemption (2 page)

             
All John could hear was laughter from behind as he broke into the early morning darkness.  And anger faded as the realization set in.   This was more than penance for being a Mikale … this was penance for what he did to Kylie.  And deep down, he knew he deserved it.  This was his punishment.

Chapter 2

As a child, John was content being alone.  He didn’t know any different.  The fact that his father and brother kept their distance didn’t really affect him, until later in life when he was old enough to understand what the whispers were about. 

The hushed tones started in pre-school.  John noticed but didn’t really understand why they whispered.  Once he started lower school, he started listening…straining to hear what they’d say.  He pretended to play in the sandbox.  They didn’t think he heard them, but he did.  And then he finally understood why both his brother and father made no room for them in their life.  In that one instant, one sentence is all it took to shift his world from one of imagination and play to one of cold harsh truth.

They say his mother died while giving birth to him.

This
is what rang through his little mind for years to come.  That whispered truth unraveled him from the inside out for the rest of his life.

             
In the early years, not knowing his mother didn’t make too much of a difference.  He had Ms. Adams, their family housekeeper and nanny.  She quickly filled that void with her nurturing spirit and motherly love. 

When Mr. Mikale would look down at him with those disappointed eyes, he would quickly look to Ms
.
Adams and see a loving pair to look up into.  Her arms and love were his center.  In the early years she was more than enough.  She was all he knew. 

However once John grew and matured, everything changed.  When he was old enough to do what came natural by showing his independence and testing boundaries, his father’s retribution starting raining down around him.  Young John realized he was living in a controlled bubble where at any second if he did anything wrong – that bubble would burst leaving all hell to rain down on him.

Jackson Mikale ran his home like boot camp, where everything had a place and the boys, he and his brother, Jesse, were to be seen not heard.  No matter how much adoration and loving support Ms. Adams showed, it just wasn’t enough to fill the vast void that increasingly grew over time in John’s heart.

             
As a teen he rebelled against it all.  Since he knew his father wouldn’t ever show him affection, he knew he could count on his anger.  Any kind of trouble was welcomed, and the more John could cause the more he felt some sort of twisted satisfaction that he could get a rise out of his father.  The amass of late nights, parties, and young girls were the sort of comfort he craved.    

As a member of one of the richest families in the Midwest and being the star quarterback, John’s good looks and notoriety cemented his role in school.  He quickly fell into life in the fast lane, and finally felt fulfilled. 

             
To John, girls were a commodity … a game.  So when an innocent awkward girl, like Kylie Wayne, secretly crushed on him, he wasn’t surprised.  After all, they all wanted him.

Kylie was his most fun game. 
How many times will she try to accidentally bump into me today,
he’d ask himself while getting ready for school. 

What will I do to ignore her today?
He laughed to himself.  He thought of himself as a god, playing with her emotions.  It gave him a secret surge of sexual pleasure to be openly wanted, while completely pretending he saw none of it. However after years of the expected: toying with the shy Kylie – the game changed. 

Awkward young Kylie started burgeoning into a swan.  It was as if a magical web spun around her during the summer between their junior and senior high school.

Kylie was now gaining the attention of his buddies, who were openly discussing her transformation with awe.  She went from being a shy, young kid, to being a sexy, shy woman, unaware of her power.  This was something John could not turn away from.  The jealousy he felt in hearing his friends talk tore at his gut. 
She was after all - his!

             
Night after night Kylie haunted his dreams, toying and teasing him.  She now had the power and was in control.  He awoke knowing he couldn’t wait any longer.

That fated day, John stepped into homeroom with the intention of showing Kylie just how sexy she could be. He wanted to introduce her to the world of John Mikale, and all the pleasure that came with it.  He knew she’d say yes when he asked her out.  It was, after all, what she’d been dreaming about since junior high.

After dinner, John drove Kylie to his home.  They sat on the pools edge slowly bantering - both knowing what was to come next.  His father was gone for the night, so they had the entire place to themselves.  Smiling to himself, he was expectant of what was to come. It felt as if his insides were humming.

John slowly swung his legs over the edge of the pool, and let them drag through the water.  He let them rub against Kylie’s well-formed calves.  As the water rippled in effect, it shattered the reflection of the night sky.

John dragged his eyes up toward Kylie.  The full moon illuminated her face giving her an almost ethereal glow.  Her dark eyes beckoned, begging him to kiss her.   He carefully leaned in; preparing to give her a taste of what kissing could be like.  He knew he’d be her first on many levels.

Kylie was an innocent with little to no experience, so he slowly made his moves, grooming her for his motives. John fully expected to be introduced to firm lips … ones that had never been kissed, but was pleasantly greeted by soft eager ones.   Kylie not only was ready for his teaching, but also seemed to engage in the game by passionately kissing him back – it was almost too good to be true.

“Let’s get more comfortable,” John stood, extending his hand and looking down into Kylie’s trusting eyes.  She reached for him, and allowed herself to be pulled up from the pool.  Kylie giggled as John pulled her closer. 

Within seconds, the full moon was covered as clouds rolled through what had been a clear night’s sky.  Dark shadows rolled across their path as John pulled her into him, walking backwards toward the patio.  He stumbled in the dark and almost fell.

“I need you to help me see.”  He laughed and pulled her close for another kiss.

Kylie wrapped her arms around John as they half kissed – half walked down the path.  John’s groin was already tight, ready to play the game.  Her mouth was willing and he wondered if the rest of her would be too.

Once they reached the patio loungers, John fell on top Kylie and began to kiss her roughly.  Finally, Kylie’s intuition kicked in.  This wasn’t what she thought getting comfortable should be.  She tried to get some distance by pushing him away, but he was too strong. She felt his firm grip and anxiety set in.

             
“Wait,” she muffled as he bruised her lips.  “What are you doing?”

             
“Come on, you know you want it.”  He replied, roughly kissing her neck.  His fingers were nimbly working the button of her white shorts.  She wore these shorts to look cute for her first date.  She did not wear them to be worked off of her.

             
“Want what?”  Kylie panicked.  “Stop!”

             
“Please Kylie.  You’re killing me!”  John paused.  He felt as if he was going to explode and couldn’t take one more second of agony.  He slowed down enough to look her pleadingly in the eyes.  He saw her panicked eyes turn to questioning ones.

             
“John, if I don’t do this I’ll lose you, the boy I’ve wanted for as long as I can remember.”

             
“You do want me,” he smiled, eyes gleaming.  Although entertaining her thoughts, he still never left his position on top of her. 

             
“But if I do this, I’ll lose myself.  What kind of choice is that to make?” Kylie asked, trying to reason with him.  She pushed him away as hard as she could.

             
In an instant something inside him clicked. 
How did she get to be the one in control?
 
Why does she get to tell me what I can and can’t have?

             
In an instant he went from wanting her to being tired of being controlled … by his father and now by her.

             
In an instant he turned from the reckless kid, with less than honorable intentions, into the monster he was to become.

Chapter 3

Present day

Silver Lake, California

Chastity breathed in, taking in the scents of cardboard and Clorox.  The familiar smell permeated the room, which took her back to when she was young and on the verge of becoming an expert packer.

             
As a child, her mother kept them on the move every few years, at first as an occupational hazard.  Her mother, Kylie, was a restaurant trainer and opened new chains every couple of years.  But later they moved on - and quickly, because they were on the run from the Mikales, a notoriously rich family in the Midwest.

             
Her entire life, Chastity had been told her father was dead.  She never even knew his name until after her mother’s recent passing, and with good reason.   After Kylie’s funeral Chastity found some hidden journals her mother kept, depicting her life in Oklahoma, while she was in high school.

             
It started out innocently enough with entries highlighting that of a normal student with an average crush, but Chastity soon learned this simple crush turned into a night Kylie would never forget. 

             
It was a night that tore her mother in two, in which she also became pregnant with Chastity. Once Chastity learned her mother’s secret, that John Mikale had raped Kylie, she understood why their life had been so fragmented.

             
Kylie faced a barrage of issues because of Chastity’s existence in her life. Just one look into Chastity’s bold green eyes would be unsettling enough as a reminder of John Mikale and what he did, but to be on the run from one of the most powerful families with the threat they’d take her daughter away was something else all together.

             
Chastity never understood why her mother came home in a panic, carrying boxes with a U-Haul in tow.  All she knew is she had to get her butt in gear or her mother would start downward spiraling.  Every couple of years it was the same – start to make friends, get settled, and when she least expected it - be gone like the wind.  Part of her never quite got over the anxiety, which gave cause to fill her wine glass to the brim for today’s venture.

             
This is what it smells like … packing up and moving out,
Chastity thought as she tore the brown packing tape and sealed up her last box.

             
Although no stranger to moving, she still had to pause in reflection - as this time it was to something more permanent. This time she wasn’t packing on the run to an unknown destination.  This time she had something to move
to
… someone to move for.  So for her, this was a first. 

             
It was a first to leisurely take her time stretching out the tape and to bind up boxes.  It was a first to carefully wrap up her belongings and tuck them neatly inside.  Yes, this was a momentous occasion, and it was one that she was almost more scared of than if simply packing on the run.

             
Chastity sat still in thought, circling her grandmother’s ring around her finger.  Its facets held and bounced the sunlight around her living room.  Watching tiny rainbows dance around her ceiling, her mind was easily pulled back to her recent trip to Venice.
             

             
Alone in a foreign country, her heart was torn in two.  On one hand it filled with joy knowing that her new boyfriend, Timothy, was coming to join her soon.  She also held much needed peace derived from a letter, from her nearly departed mother, which she read on the plane on route to Italy.   These were things to celebrate and savor, while enjoying the new discoveries a new country could offer.