Faith, Honor & Freedom (29 page)

“I need to pull the curtain closed for privacy,” a beautiful young doctor with curly red hair says.

“No, please, I need to watch her,” I beg.

The doctor bends down and whispers to me, “I promise they’re not going to let her out of their sight, okay? You can still talk to her through the curtain.”

Slowly, I nod. I’m losing this battle, but at least they seem to be my side. She’s still in the same room as me.

I lay down on the table as the doctor starts her exam. She’s not going to find much. Aside from some raw cuts from the ties on my wrists, some bruises from being thrown around, and a small contusion of my head from the butt of his knife, I’m relatively unscathed. Jade, on the other hand, is probably going to need a few stitches for the cut on her head.

I hear a commotion outside of the room and the door opens. A frantic looking Weston enters the room, his eyes searching for me. The nurse from beside me rushes over. “Sir, you’re not allowed to be in here, officer or not.”

“It’s okay,” I say, tears finally escaping. “He’s with me.”

I can’t even describe the feeling I get from seeing him again. It’s something along the lines of sheer happiness, joy, love, euphoria … there’s just no single word that can express all of the good feelings he evokes inside of me.

“Weston,” I breathe as he rushes to my side, kissing my cheek.

“You’re alive, you’re really alive,” he says.

“Of course.”

“And Jade? She looked okay, too.”

“She’s just fine. Those boys of yours did incredible. Can you call my mom and dad, let them know I’m okay?”

“Yeah, shit. I called your dad when you went missing. He’s never going to let me marry you now,” he says, but there’s still a huge smile on his face. I have to wonder if he’s feeling what I’m feeling, too. This is what it feels like to truly love someone, to open your heart. I guess it didn’t take much when I already loved him; I just never allowed myself to fall in love with him.

“I love you,” I whisper.

“I love you, too, Lana. Always,” he says, bending down and placing a quick kiss on my lips.

“I should probably let the doctor finish her exam, though,” I look over at the doctor who’s scanning a chart with the nurse.

“I never want to let you out of my sight again,” he says quietly. How it’s possible after such a horrid attack, to be feeling nothing but good feelings, I’ll never be sure. But Weston knows how to warm the heart and let me know that there is just as much good in this world as there is bad.

“I’ll be fine. Mom and Dad might not be, though.”

“You’re right. I’ll be right outside the door. Just yell if you need anything. Anything at all.”

“I will,” I promise.

“I can’t tell you how happy I am to see you.”

“Ditto,” I say, as he turns and leaves the room, glancing back a final time. I nod, letting him know that I’m all right.

“Mom, for the billionth time, I’m fine. I guess deep down I always knew he would come back for me, I’m just glad we came out relatively unscathed,” I say, attempting to reassure her for the millionth time. After Weston called them, they were here within minutes, Mom crying—no wonder I’m so emotional—and Dad looking much older than he did before all of this began. I can’t imagine how taxing this has been for them both, and I really wish they weren’t forced to endure it.

Dad and Weston left the room after Dad gave me the biggest hug and kiss ever. I hope Dad goes easy on him. I look across the room at a sleeping Jade. I refused to leave without her, and they wanted to keep her overnight for observation since she hit her head so hard. I was glad, actually, because we still have no idea what we’re going to do with her. Mom catches me staring at Jade and frowns.

“I still can’t believe all that girl has been through, it just doesn’t seem fair,” Mom says in a hushed voice, shaking her head. After Jade had fallen asleep, I’d told her about what she had said in her letter and about Button. Mom’s heart was just about broken by the end of it.

“I know. I just want to help her Mom, but I’m not sure how. She doesn’t want to accept anything from me, and I’m scared she’ll run if I push too hard.”

“I know honey, and you’ve been through enough. Are you going to adopt Button?” she asks.

I shrug my shoulders, because I really don’t know what I’m going to do. “I’d like to, but I just don’t know if I can, you know? I lost my savings from the hospital stay, and I don’t have much in the way of steady income. I basically depend on the full moon,” I laugh. I know Mom gets it. Even though she never got into midwifery or the business of baby birthing, she did live with Grams, and I’m sure she understands it well.

“Nonsense Lana, I hope I taught you better than that. You know your father and I will help you until you get back on your feet. I can see it in your eyes every time you talk about that baby. She’s yours, and you know it. Fight for her, Lana, and everything else will fall into place. It always does,” she says, giving me a warm smile. She has no idea still that I’m unable to have children of my own, and I feel like it makes me take her advice to heart even more.

“Thanks Mom.”

“Now, don’t breathe a word, because I don’t know what your father will say, but what if Jade came to stay with us? We’re both home all day to watch her. She needs to get back to school, and be a fourteen year old kid. She’s far too young to have lived the life she has,” Mom says dejectedly, looking over at Jade.

“I’m not sure Mom. If by some miracle I can adopt Button, I wouldn’t be able to bring her around Jade. She refuses to even look at her. I think she’s still scared of whoever raped her, and she’s scared to see their face in hers.”

Mom frowns in the way that only moms can. “Well, it’s only an idea. I’m not going to force the girl to do anything. It would be so nice to have someone in the house again, though. We miss you … and your brother,” she says, swallowing back any sadness she feels.

“Me too.” I pull her into a hug, hoping she knows just how much I love her. I’m truly blessed with an incredible family. I can’t imagine growing up without one.

“Ask Dad,” I whisper into her hair. “If he says yes, I’ll work on Jade.”

Dad and Weston return some time later and Mom and Dad leave to get something to eat. I’m sure Mom is going to bring up Jade to Dad, and I’m anxious. I’m not sure which way I want it to go yet, but I know I want Jade to be safe and happy no matter what happens. I can’t think of any two people who could give her all that she needs more than my parents could.

Jade is still asleep, and Weston has climbed into my bed with me. His warmth around me makes me feel at ease.

“I was so worried about you tonight,” he says in a hushed voice.

“I’m okay.”

“Yeah, but it wasn’t me who saved you two. I should have never left you girls there alone …” he says, beating himself up.

“We’re okay now,” I reiterate. He really needs to stop harboring the guilt. Maybe I’m still running high on adrenaline from it, but I feel fine. Alec is behind bars, and I have faith in the system. My dad’s a cop, my brother was a cop, and now my boyfriend is a cop. Add that to the fact that they caught him in the act and how many murders he committed, and I have no worries about him ever seeing sunlight again.

I’m safe, Jade’s safe, and Button is safe. I had a nurse check and make sure she didn’t go to her foster family yet. If I keep dwelling on all of this bad shit that’s happened to me, I’m never going to move forward, and at almost thirty, I need to work on doing just that.

“Can I meet her?” Weston whispers in my ear. I know he’s talking about Button.

“You’d like to?” I ask, stunned. Why on Earth would he want to meet her? He’s looking for a family for her.

“I’d like to meet my future daughter,” he says, and I gasp. He just said daughter … as in he wants to keep her. As in he wants to be with me, and keep her. I allow a smile to spread across my face before looking back up at him.

“Are you sure?” I ask.

“Never been more certain of anything in my life, Sunshine. You’re everything to me, and she means something to you. Not only would I never take that away from you, but I want to be a part of it with you.”

I let go of a breath, and squeeze my arms tightly around him. Everything sure has a way of working itself out. We wait for Mom and Dad to come back so they can stay and watch Jade before we walk down to the NICU.

I can’t help but feel apprehensive. I know it’s impossible for him not to love Button, but what if he meets her, falls in love like I did, and then we’re not approved to adopt her. I know Jade’s back, but she was gone a long time, with very little contact. Does her say even matter anymore?

We arrive at the NICU, and I teach him how to wash up and help him into a gown. A flutter of nervous excitement stirs in my belly as we make our way to Button’s cot. I greet her nurse and let her know that I brought my detective friend with me. She gives us some privacy. I look up at Weston, whose eyes are glued on a sweet, chubby Button. She’s really filled out nicely since she was born. He looks back at me with tears in his eyes. “She’s beautiful.”

I nod my head. “She is.”

“Can I hold her?” he asks, and my heart warms. Could he really, truly be considering this?

I motion toward a chair, and he takes a seat. I scoop Button up into my arms. She’s wearing a white sleeper with a brown and pink owl pattern on it. I ordered it for her a few weeks ago, hoping she would grow into it, and here she is, my big Button now.

I take a few steps toward Weston and lay her gently in his arms. He fumbles awkwardly for a moment before settling in with her.

“She’s so small,” he remarks, staring down at her with wonder.

“She’s more than doubled in size since she was born,” I jest nervously.

Button stirs, and opens her eyes, looking around. Her gaze seems to focus on Weston, and she reaches her hand out toward him. He places his finger inside her hand, and she wraps her hand around his and clamps down. I say a little prayer to God, Rhett, and whoever else is listening to make sure Button will be our daughter.

I can’t do it alone, but with the help of Weston, maybe it’s possible. I know we have a lot of love to give; it’s everything else I worry about.

Epilogue

“Where are we going?” I ask Weston. I can’t stand surprises, and he’s taken me for a drive, insisting he has a great one.

“It’s a surprise. Now put this on,” he says, pulling a pink blindfold from inside of his jacket pocket.

“There’s no way!” I cry.

“Come on! I’m sure under different circumstances you wouldn’t be complaining.”

I smirk, thinking about how fun he could probably make this blindfold. His bright blue eyes are staring back at me with such warmth, that I have to wonder why I hadn’t seen it sooner. He says he’s always loved me, but how could I have missed it when I see it staring back at me so plainly now? I give his handsomeness a final once over before allowing him to tie the blindfold around my head.

We drive for another ten minutes before the truck comes to a stop. I hear his door open and close and then my door open beside me. I undo my seat belt and he helps me down. I reach out, hoping he will grab my hand, to lead the way, but instead he scoops me up, cradling me against his chest. I breathe in deeply, enjoying the masculine scent that’s unique to him. I’ve come to associate it with a feeling of security, happiness, and ease.

“Where are you taking me?”

“Surprise,” he says smugly, and I feel his lips press up against my forehead. He takes a dozen or so steps before stopping. I hear the jingling of keys, and I can’t help but feel even more confused.

“Where are we?”

“Shh,” he whispers.

I hear the door close behind us, and I know we’re in some sort of building or house, but I can’t be sure of which. He takes twenty or so more steps before setting me down.

“Now?” I ask, reaching for my blindfold.

“No!” he says quickly, reaching to grab my hands. I decide to just stay quiet, so as not to ruin whatever he has planned.

I hear him shuffling, but he keeps hold of my hands.

“Lana,” he says nervously. “I’ve loved you since I was just a kid. You’ve always been the sunshine in my life. You’re the reason I get out of bed every morning, and the reason I’m so excited to fall into bed every night. You’re my best friend, and I can’t imagine spending another day without the promise of you in it.” I feel my hot tears soaking through the blindfold. I feel like I know the reason he’s saying this all to me, but why am I blindfolded?

I bite my lip, waiting for him to continue. “Lana, will you make me a better man and promise to be my wife?”

I don’t hesitate a second before answering “I will.” I’m in, always. I may have been too stupid to realize it and fight for it before, but at almost thirty, I know a good thing when I see one. I’m going to hold on tight and never let go, because there’s nothing better in this world then Weston Hoss.

I feel him slip something cool onto my finger. “Can I look now?” I ask, excitedly.

I hear his footsteps as he moves behind me, and then his warmth against my body. “One more thing,” he breathes into my ear, before lifting the blindfold from my eyes.

It takes a minute for my eyes to adjust, and even then I have a hard time believing what I see. A white crib with lavender bedding, a rocking chair with matching cushions, a changing table, a baby swing … “What is this?” I ask, praying it means what I think it does.

“I don’t just want to marry you, Lana. I want everything with you. Never knew that I wanted kids until I knew I wanted you to be their mother. It doesn’t matter that you can’t grow them inside of you, not at all. What matters is everything after they’re here.” I raise my eyebrows wondering what the hell he’s talking about. “Button’s our girl. The social worker called this morning … we won the custody hearing.”

I drop down to my knees as more hot tears stream down my face, happy tears for once. I’ve gotten everything I’ve ever dreamed of, all in one day.

“She’s ours?” I ask, just to be sure.

“She’s ours, Sunshine. We’re going to have to do a little better than Button now,” he chuckles.