Fallen (7 page)

“
Must I decide now?”

“
No. Take as much time as you need. I have a few assignments for you to complete. While you are about your work, I want you to think long and hard about your decision. Whatever you decide will be irrevocable. You cannot change your mind.”

“
I understand. Thank you.”

“
You’re welcome, my son.”

Chapter 11: Reunited

Shayla removed her ballet slippers and tossed them into her bag with a sigh. Her daily exercises were helping her to regain her strength, and she was almost ready to start dancing again. It was a good thing too, because she needed the distraction. It had been one month since she’d seen Amir. She had not stopped thinking about him.

The smell of coffee reminded her of their mornings together. For the first week after he left, she had cried over breakfast. Now, she was just numb and lonely.

“
Good to have you back, Shayla,” remarked Robert, a fellow member of the company. He’d just arrived at the studio for a rehearsal. Shayla accepted his outstretched hand and allowed him to pull her to her feet. She slung her bag over her shoulder and managed a weak smile.

“
Thanks Robert. It’s good to be back.”

Waving goodbye to Robert and several other dancers who were pouring in, Shayla left through the double glass doors. She paused for a moment on the sidewalk to fish her cell phone out of her bag. No missed calls. No messages. Nothing. Her heart sank before she chastised herself for being silly. One month with no word from him was a pretty clear indication of where she stood with him.

Shoving the phone into her pocket she turned toward home and nearly collided with a tall gentleman in a black trench coat.

“
Daddy!” she exclaimed, when she looked up into the stranger’s face. Ronald Gaines smiled down at his daughter tentatively.

“
I was hoping to run into you here. I knew you wouldn’t be able to sit still for too long. I was sure once you were all better, you’d be back to dancing.”

Shayla shrugged. “I’m doing great. Couldn’t be better. It was nice to see you Dad.”

“
Wait!” he grabbed her arm gently before she could breeze past him. “Please don’t treat me like a stranger, Shayla.”

“
For the last two years I haven’t heard a word from my own parents. I’d say that’s pretty strange.”

“
I was hoping I’d find you here so we could talk. Would that be okay?”

Shayla sighed, annoyed, but couldn’t help feeling a twinge in her heart for her father. She supposed he hadn’t meant to be neglectful; he was just a workaholic. Where her mother was cold and brittle, her father had always been warm and friendly. He just hadn’t been around enough for Shayla to see that side of him often. She supposed she could at least talk to him.

“
I haven’t had lunch yet,” she said. “There’s a little diner I like on the end of this street.”

“
Sounds good.”

They fell into step beside each other and walked in silence until they reached the diner. Not one word passed between them as they looked over their menus and ordered. Once their food was in front of them, Ronald finally spoke.

“
I’ve wanted to reach out to you, Shayla. All this time
,
I haven’t stopped thinking about my little girl.”

“
I’ve been right here!” she cried, banging her open palm against the table. Every old and bitter feeling she’d ever held against her parents was bubbling to the surface. She felt as if someone had ripped the stitches from an old wound. “I was right here and you never called. You never called or showed up!”

“
You never reached out to us either Shayla,” he said pointedly.

He had a point. Shayla turned away to stare out of the window. “You cut me off. You cut me off because I didn’t want to be what you wanted me to be.”

“
We were just a little shocked by your decision. After we put you through four years of college, you stop just one semester short of graduation to pursue a career as a dancer? We didn’t know what to think.”

“
You could have supported me. You could have encouraged me to live my dream.”

“
You’re right.” Ronald sighed in resignation. “Of course now it would seem you’re living your dream just fine without our support.”

Shayla’s eyes met his and she saw the glistening of tears there. Her heart melted and she reached across the table to take his hand. “I still need you, Daddy. I still need your support.”

He smiled and dabbed at the corner of his eye. “I’m so sorry about everything that’s happened, Princess. I know I can’t undo the last two years, but we can start over. I’d really love to hear about how your career has been going.”

Shayla, never one to pass up an opportunity to talk about dance, spent the rest of their lunch date telling him everything. She told him of her first failed auditions, of her money troubles the first few months when jobs were few and far between. He glowed with pride when she told him of her acceptance into the Alvin Ailey American Dance Theater.

“
It sounds as if things are going well for you. I know you may not believe this, but I’m proud of you.”

“
Thanks Daddy.”

“
I don’t suppose you want to tell me about the young man who was at your apartment when your mother and I stopped by?”

Shayla’s smile faded rapidly and she instantly retreated behind a mask of indifference. “Just a friend, Daddy.”

Ronald chuckled good-naturedly. “And what is this ‘friend’s’ name?”

“
Amir.”

“
Interesting name. He certainly seemed protective of you.”

“
Daddy I don’t want to talk about him.”

“
Come on, tell your old man. Is it serious?”

Shayla fought back tears and wrapped her hands around her warm coffee mug. “I don’t know.”

“
Well, I won’t pry any more. But if you do decide it’s serious, I’ll be waiting to meet him.”

“
Of course,” she replied with a roll of her eyes. “So you can scare him away like you did all my high school boyfriends.”

Ronald laughed. “A father’s got to protect his girl. You’re never too old for that, you know. But I do have one last question and then I’ll let it go.”

“
What’s that?”

“
I’m only asking because I know your mother will. You should be prepared, just in case.”

“
Are you going to ask me?”

“
Aren’t there any nice black men around that you could date?”

“
Daddy!”

“
I’m just telling you what you’re mother’s going to say. You know how she can be. Me, I could care less what color he is so long as you’re happy.”

Shayla thought of those two months they had spent together. She had been happy. Now all she could feel was lonely emptiness.

Amir stood outside of the small community theater with his hands buried deep in his pockets. Shayla was inside, he could feel her. He hadn’t intended on stopping by, but when he had landed just a few buildings over from the theater and sensed Shayla’s presence, he hadn’t been able to stay away.

After a few minutes of indecision, Amir placed his hand on the door and pushed it open. Just a glimpse, he told himself
.
I
t would be enough and then he would leave. The music that blared from inside was pounding and seductive, as well as hypnotic. Pounding drums called to him, seeming to suck him into the room until he was standing at the back of the theater.

Shayla danced alongside another dancer, a man. The two of them moved in perfect timing together with the pounding rhythm as their guide. Amir couldn’t tear his eyes away from Shayla as she danced, long limbs extending as she leaped and turned about the stage. He could feel her joy, her passion. He felt his heart swelling as he watched, filled with the intense radiance that emanated from her.

The male dancer wrapped his arms around Shayla as they moved together, before swinging her around in a series of lifts and turns. His hands at Shayla’s waist caused an unfamiliar emotion to well up inside Amir. Jealousy? It was ridiculous, he knew, but something inside of him raged at the sight of another man’s hands where he wanted his to be.
Mine!
His inner voice wouldn’t let up as he watched the dance.
Mine! Mine! Mine!

Amir shook his head to clear his thoughts but they wouldn’t go away.
Mine!
He could see in his mind, Shayla as she grew older, marrying a man much like the one she danced with on stage. He could see them with a house outside the city and children who took dance lessons. They owned a minivan and sang loudly to the radio together as they drove their kids to school. At night, after the kids fell asleep, he would lead her to the bedroom, lay her down on cool sheets and…
No!

Amir shook his head again, shoving the images away. It couldn’t happen that way; he wouldn’t let it. He would live the rest of eternity with nothing but regret if he did. Eternity was a very long time.

His decision made, Amir stood impatiently waiting for Shayla’s dance to finish. When the music ended and applause filled the air, Amir watched her retreat with her partner backstage. Once they were gone, he left the way he came and circled around to the alley and the back entrance he knew she would come out of.

He leaned against the side of the building and waited.

Chapter 12: The Revelation

Shayla nearly jumped a mile in the air when a man’s voice called out to her from the dark alley. She was two seconds away from giving the stranger a face full of pepper spray, when he stepped into the moonlight. She sighed with relief, then her heart jumped up into her throat.

“
Oh, it’s just you,” she said, putting the safety switch back in place on her tiny can of pepper spray. “You scared the crap out of me, Amir.”

“
I’m sorry,” he said, stepping closer. “I was hoping we could talk.”

Shayla paused for a moment, as if considering this, not wanting to seem too eager. It took every ounce of her will not to launch herself into his arms and beg him to take her back on his terms, any terms. Anything had to be better than the aching loneliness she felt every day that only he could fill.

“
Why don’t you walk me home and we can talk there?” she said, already walking in the direction of her apartment. Amir fell in beside her and walked silently, hands shoved down into his pockets. She tried not to look at him but couldn’t stop peeking at him out of the corner of her eye. She couldn’t help but notice the way the night breeze ruffled his wavy hair, or the way his jacket fit across broad shoulders. She was relieved when they finally arrived, but nervous as well. What did he want?

When they were inside she offered him coffee; he accepted, of course. The silence stretched on as she made the coffee. Once she’d finished and handed him his mug, she sat beside him on the couch, not too close, and waited. He had wanted to talk so she would let him go first.

“
I’m sure you’re wondering why I’m here when you haven’t heard from me in weeks.”

She nodded. “I didn’t think I’d see you again.”

“
I couldn’t stay away.” He finally raised his head to look at her and Shayla’s heart broke at the pain she saw there. Something was bothering him and whatever it was, it had caused him to walk out of her life. Now he was back, and Shayla hoped to God he was ready to tell her why.

“
I need you to understand that I didn’t leave because I didn’t want to be with you. I need you to know that.”

She reached out tentatively and took his hand. Her tension immediately eased, and his seemed to as well. The gesture was so familiar to them both. “I do understand,” she replied. “At least
,
I understand that this didn’t happen because you wanted it to. I just wish you would tell me what it is.”

“
That’s why I’m here. It’s hard to explain, Shayla, so bear with me.”

“
I’m all ears.”

He took a deep breath, a sip of coffee, another deep breath. Shayla waited in silence.

“
I’m not what you think I am Shayla. I didn’t lie to you, but I didn’t tell you the truth either. I’m…that is, I’m not exactly human.”

Silence. He looked up at her nervously and she fought against a smile. “Seriously?” she asked with a chuckle. “What are you
,
an alien or something?”

“
You don’t believe me.”

Shayla shrugged. “I’ve heard worse excuses from an ex-boyfriend.”

“
It’s not an excuse.”

When she shrugged again, his mouth tightened with obvious annoyance. “You see the plant over there, the one you haven’t watered in months?” She nodded. “Bring it to me.”

Still amused, and wondering what he was going to do with the plant, Shayla gladly obliged him. The plant was a hibiscus, or at least it was a dead hibiscus. When her parents had taken her to Hawaii the summer after high school graduation, Shayla had fallen in love with the tropical state flower. She’d bought one, hoping to bring a little bit of Hawaii’s warmth and exotic flavor into her apartment. It had died within a month. She kept forgetting to throw the darn thing out.