Falling for the Ghost of You (30 page)

Is that what this
i
s? 
Is that what I am?  Research?  It makes sense now.  Zane—Aiden—
was using me.  Of course
he was.  I
knew
there was something he was hiding, and like an idiot, I
never pursued any of my suspicions.
  Because, deep down, I trusted him. 

What an idiot I am.

I stand there, frozen, until the sounds of the shower turning off propels me into action.  I put Zane's wallet back, and his script, then I frantically throw on something to wear.

I need to get out of here.  I don't even want to look at him, or be in the same room as him.  I have to go.

I grab my things together, not caring
if I missed anything.  Shoes—w
here the hell, are they?!

I spot them under a chair.  I grab them and sling my bag over my shoulder, and race towards the door.

The bathroom door is just opening.  I don't stop.   I reach the door, throwing it open, then carefully shutting it behind me.  I don't want him to know I've left.  Not yet.

Heart pounding so fast, I'm breathless and dizzy, I slap at the elevator's down button.
 
Finally, the doors slide open.  When I'm pressing the lobby button, I hear my name being called.

I look up to see Zane running full speed down the hall, shirtless and shoeless.  He is coming so fast, he might catch me before the doors close.  I stab the close button over and over.  The doors slide shut with Zane just an
arm’s
length away.

I guess I'm crying.  Hot tears fall relentlessly from my eyes as I sag against the wall. 

The look on his face—
confused, frustrated, a little angry.  He doesn't know I know.

I don't remember getting out of the elevator and going through the lobby.  Everything is becoming increasingly foggy.  I
just
find myself standing in front of the hotel
all of a sudden
.

A blue and white car stops in front of me.  Numbly, I open the back door and slide into the seat.

"Can I help you?" the dark haired driver asks, swiveling his head to look at me.

"I need to get home to Hidden Cove."

"Lady, this isn't a cab."

Oh.  Great.

"Sorry," I mutter, quickly sliding back out.

This time I make sure the car says cab on it before I get in.

Rico's Cab Service.  Wonderful
.  I climb into the backseat of the tiny white car.

"I need to get to Hidden Cove.  Please hurry," I say to the grandmotherly woman behind the wheel.

She frowns at me through the rearview mirror.  "Hidden Cove, you say?  That's two hours away.  I don't really..."

She trails off, studying me harder.  "It's going to be quite a bit of money," she warns.

"That's fine, I have it.  Just—p
lease, go!"

Zane has just appeared out the doors.  He spots me just as we are pulling away.

It's close.  He manages to thump on my window before my cab driver accelerates and we leave him behind.

I can't help glancing back to look at him.  He's standing in the road, breathing heavily, watching me go.

I turn away from the sight of him, squeezing my eyes shut.  The pain in my heart is crushing.

"That you boyfriend?"  Grandmotherly Lady asks.  "What'd he do to you?"

"Nothing,"
I say, my eyes still closed.  "It’s just—h
e's...not who I thought he was."

"They never are, dear."

I ignore my phone's constant beeping, letting me know I have missed calls and text messages.  I've been on the internet, looking up Aiden Cross.  According to pictures and various gossip sites, Aiden Cross and beautiful young actress Alaina Skye are a hot item. 
God
.  According to one article, the picture of Aiden and Alaina, laughing with their arms around each other, was taken just a couple of days ago.  I want to vomit.

There are pictures of him with many other gorgeous girls as well.  At clubs, restaurants...on the red carpet.  He's caught in one picture with his hand on a supermodel's ass in one.  He makes headlines when he's pictured sporting a sexy new short-haired
clean-shaven
look.  His hair is blonde in all the photos, his eyes that vivid swimming pool blue.

I try to look for the Zane I know in the pictures of the famous singer, but I don't find him.  I'm looking for someone who doesn't exist.

I'm so cold.  My insides are frozen, and my chest aches.  The rest of me is numb.  I don't know...what am I going to do?

I scroll through my messages, and my heart gives a jolt when I see I have fifteen calls and texts from Mom.

He called her?

Shit!  I send a quick text to her, letting her know I'm okay and on my way home.  I send Lauren the same text.  She's texted me about a billion times
, too
.  The rest are from Zane.  I erase all his mes
sages without even looking at them
, then I turn my phone off.

I spend the rest of the ride looking out the window, not seeing anything,
and
trying desperately to not feel anything.

I don't know where to go once I'm back in Hidden Cove.  Not home.  God, no.  Not Lauren's, either.  I'm not ready to talk.  Not yet.

I end up having the cab drop me off at the beach.  It's the only place I can think of.  I drop down into the sand, and just stare at the waves.

I'm there for a long time.  When I come back to myself, the sun is setting over the water in a dazzling display of color.

I wipe my cheeks and discover they are cold and
wet with tears.  I need to go—o
r pee in the ocean.

Before I leave, I turn my phone on and call Lauren.

"V, where are you?
!
  Are you okay?"

She sounds panicked.  Did she talk to Zane?

I start crying again.  "
Lauren, can I come over.  Zane—he—
"

"He's here," she interrupts me.  "He's been standing in the hallway for hours now.  What
happened
, V?  He looks destroyed."

"No!"  I shake my head emphatically.  "I can't...I don't want to see him!"

Lauren sighs.  "You have t
o.  He said he's not leaving until you talk to him---i
n person.  If he stays, we'll get in trouble.  You know how the manager is."

I let my head fall back in frustration, tears pooling in my eyes.  "Okay," I say into the phone.
  "I'll—
I guess I'll be there."

Damn Zane.  I don't want to do this now.  I'm not ready to face him. 

Aiden Cross.  This has got be some kind of dream.

******

Chapter 31

I walk to Lauren's from the beach.  By the time I rea
ch the complex, I'm exhausted—p
hysically and emotionally.  I'm sure I look horrible.  My eyes are gr
itty from crying, and my hair i
s a windblown mess. 
I guess
I don't really care.

I see him before he sees me.  He's leaning against the wall directly across from Lauren's
door
, arms crossed over his chest.

Lauren said he looked destroyed, and I'm shocked to see she's right.  Zane's face is pale, dark circles under his eyes.  He looks as exhausted as I feel.

His head suddenly comes up at my cautious approach.  His eyes seem to burn into mine.
 
"Violet."

He reaches for me, but I flinch away.

"Don't touch me!"

I mean to snap, but my voice comes out high and panicked.  I cringe away from him.  He is not the guy I sat in the sand with and talked for hours and hours with.  He's not the one I had the most incredible night
of life with.  He's a stranger—an incredibly famous…
liar
.

"You know," Zane says.  His voice is quiet, emotionless.

I nod stiffly.  "Good bye, Aiden."

I try to walk past him to Lauren's door, but he grabs me and cages me against the wall.

Leaning down to look me in the eye, he speaks urgently.  "Violet, I am so damn sorry you found out like
this.  I was going to tell you—
"

"It's okay," I interrupt, turning my he
ad away.  "You were using me—I
get it.  I should have realized.  It's
done, it’s
over with, so just leave."

Zane exhales loudly in frustration.  "No, that's not what thi
s is about.  You and me, it's—l
ook, can we go somewhere and talk?"

"No!"  I shake my head
, suddenly furious
.  "I'm not going anywhere with you!"

I’m too loud.  Mrs. Jacobs’ door
creaks open next to us.  She peers out through the crack, concerned. 

"You okay, Violet?" she calls.

Zane backs up an inch.  I manage to force a smile on my face.  "I'm fine, thank you.  Sorry about the noise."

Mrs. Jacobs frowns, with a suspicious look for Zane.  "Holler if you need me," she says before she shuts the door.

"Let's get out of here," he mutters, putting a hand on my waist.

I pull away.  "I’m not going with you
.  I don't know you.  I don’t
know
you!
"

He glares down at me, frustrated. 
"You knew me really well last night, when you were screaming out my name."

I gasp, then I slap him—
hard as I can.  We are both stunned.  My palm is stinging.  I rub it gently against my pant leg.

His expression darkening, Zane nods slightly.  "I deserved that
.  I’m sorry
," he acknowledges grimly.  Then he leans closer, his mouth brushing against my ear.

"I haven't changed.  I'm still me.  You
do
know
me, t
he real me.  I'm the same guy
who found you stuck in a doorway,
crying, with your pants split—t
he same one who was inside of you all night."

His voice is low and fierce
.  I tremble violently at his words and the memories they stir up.

"Please just let me go," I plead.  The tears are falling faster and faster now.  "Just stay away from me!"

"I can't."  His forehead touches mine gently, but he is grim with determination.  "Come with me...hear me out.  I'm not going anywhere until you do."

I glare up at him, pushed past my limit
.  "Why are you doing this to m
e?!  You've had your laughs.   Just—go!  L
eave me alone!"

He shakes his head, his expression implacable.  "Three more seconds, and I'm carrying you out of here.  One."

I try to wiggle away, but he has me pinned with his bod
y.  "Someone will call the cops,
"
I threaten.

"I don't give a fuck.  Two."

What choice do I have?  More people are starting to peek out their doors, and it won't be long before someone complains.
  I don’t want to get Lauren in trouble.

"Fin
e," I say stiffly.  "I need to
tell Lauren."

Zane moves back so I can step away.  As I approach her apartment, the door swings open.  Lauren stand in the doorway, her expression confirmin
g that she's been listening in—which
is fine.  The twins are crowding behind h
er, red heads bobbing eagerly—s
o not fine.

"You okay, V?" Lauren shoots a quick glance at Zane, then back to me.

I nod.  "I'll call you later.  If my mom calls you, can you tell her I'll be home very soon?"

"Sure.  Call me if you need me."

She gives me a meaningful look.  I just shrug. When she shuts the door, I turn to Zane.

"Let's go."

I silently follow him to his truck, refusing to look at him.  I don't even want to breathe too deeply and inhale his soap and fresh laundry scent, because it always turns me on.  I'm appalled I can still feel that way about him, but I
guess I can't help those
teenage hormones.

"Go to Taco Bill's," I blurt out as he starts the engine.

Zane stares down at the steering wheel, his jaw clenching.  "That's hardly a private place to talk."

"I don't want to be alone with you," I say bluntly.

"What, I'm a psycho killer now?"

I narrow my eyes at him.  "I don't trust you.  Because you
lied
to me."