Fated Bliss (Bliss #2) (29 page)

“You don’t know?” he questioned, surprised.

I pursed my lips. “Would I be askin’?”

Ben grimaced. “God, your ex was a douche bag.”

“We’ve already covered that. Come on…tell me. Does that happen all the time?”

He scratched the side of his head, uncertain. “I’m not sure.”

Puzzled, I asked, “Then why would you call Patrick a douche bag if even you haven’t done it before?”

Ben took a moment to consider my question and continued to eat.

Was this another line I shouldn’t cross with him?

I let the question hang and finished off my plate. When I was done, Ben took it and sat them on the nightstand. We settled back against the headboard, both of us sipping our beers.

This was taking entirely too long.

“Forget I asked,” I grumbled, annoyed, and finished off my beer.

All he had to do was say
next question,
and I would have let it roll off my back. The silent treatment was uncalled for. To discuss anything with him was like dodging bullets.

“No,” Ben said, his face jerking my way with surprise. He took the beer bottle from me and placed them next to our empty plates. “I wanted to finish eating before I talked about it. It has to do with Gwen, and everything about her kills my appetite. I was hungry.”

It was my turn to laugh. That was just too freaking funny not to.

Ben waited for my humor to die down to state, “I’m glad one of us finds it funny.”

“Sorry,” I told him, trying to keep a straight face. “It was the way you said it, so straightforward.”

“It’s the truth. That woman is… Well, you know.”

That killed all humor.

“Yeah.” I nodded. “A real buzzkill.”

“Yes. That and more.”

“So,” I prompted him.

“No, I never did that with Gwen. Our sex life was…dull.” His face soured. “How our marriage began tainted sex for me. Well, to have sex with her, I mean. The first few years, I went without. Being a teenager at the time, I thought I’d die. But I grew accustomed to it.”

“That had to blow,” I commented.

Amused, he winked. “I would have killed for one of those back then.”

I slapped his arm. “Shut up. Be serious for a moment.”

He chuckled, but then it tapered off and he traced the pattern of my quilt. “I’m being very serious. Yours was the first I’ve had since I was sixteen.”

“Really? She didn’t do that for you?” I questioned, floored by his confession.

Ben curled his lip in distaste. “She’s unhinged and had teeth – and she got angry at the drop of a hat. No way in hell I was letting her mouth anywhere near my dick. There was no telling the damage she could’ve done.”

It took everything in me to keep a straight face. I couldn’t laugh again after seeing how serious he was. At the same time, I felt awful for him.

Unaware of my internal struggles, Ben continued, “Once Gwen and I decided to work things through, she thought sex would bring us closer. By that point, I was so sexually frustrated I would have said yes to anything.” He shrugged, unashamed. “That was a bad idea. It was like making love to a bag of bones.”

I winced for him. “Ouch.”

“Yes,” he agreed. “It wasn’t enjoyable. Also, for Gwen, sex was basic and straight to the point. There was no build up, no oral sex. I did a lot of research, trying to find ways to get her to loosen up, but she brushed aside every suggestion I made. She had to be the one holding the reins at all times, in and out of bed.”

That explained his need for dominance.

“Not only that, she used sex as a bargaining chip. She thought she could manipulate me with it.”
Bitch.
“After a while, I gave up.” He screwed up his face, his aversion to the subject evident. “I only had sex with her when I couldn’t take celibacy any longer. It was painful to get through, but sometimes the state of my frustrations was too much to bear. That ended a few years ago. We didn’t share rooms after that.”

“What happened?” I asked.

Ben exhaled roughly, so I tugged his arm around my shoulders and snuggled into his side, letting him know I wasn’t going anywhere and he could tell me anything. He kissed my hair in thanks.

Sighing again, he ran a hand up and down my arm. “I just couldn’t do it anymore. Plus, sleeping with her gave her a misguided hope that I’d love her one day.”

Ouch.

However…

“How she could think that after everythin’ still boggles my mind.”

Ben gave me a squeeze. “Gwen is a very sick and twisted individual, sweetheart. I still don’t understand her thought process.”

Even though we were talking about some serious stuff, I was giddy that he was opening up to me more.

“So you just went without?” I searched hesitantly, my earlier concerns making another appearance.

“Are you asking if I cheated on her?” Ben questioned, sounding somewhere between hurt and entertained.

I huffed. “I can’t really blame you if you did. She lied and conned her way into your marriage, and you despised her for what she did to you. Most men would have if they were in your shoes.”

Please don’t say you’re like most men. Please don’t say you’re like most men.

The mantra continued on a loop in my mind as I waited for him to respond.

“I can’t say that I would or wouldn’t in this case – it was never an option for me,” he finally disclosed, but I was highly confused by it.

“How so?”

“Her father made us sign a prenuptial agreement that included a clause on adultery. If I had strayed and she had proof of it, I would’ve lost a big chunk of my income
and
all rights to Lincoln.”

Holy shit.

She’d literally had him by the balls the whole time.

Outraged for him, I fumed, “Is that even legal?!”

“I never really checked,” Ben answered, slightly startled by the revelation. It cleared, and he shrugged. There wasn’t a whole lot he could do about it now. “I didn’t know about it until the documents were signed. My dad thought it was best not to inform me until it was a done deal.” Ben made a strangled noise in his throat. “He said it would build character.”

I hated his father instantly.

“Sorry sack of shit,” I grumbled.

Ben chuckled lowly, startling me. “I’m sorry. You’re only saying what I’ve thought for so long.”

I smiled up at him. “Someone had to say it.”

Ben’s laughter slowly died. “True.”

“So, you never…?”

“Nope.” Ben peered down at me, his expression growing dismal. “I couldn’t, and wouldn’t, risk Linc like that. It was one of the hardest things I’d ever done, but I did it for him. Nothing in the world meant more, my needs included.” Ben stared at the wall across from us and started tinkering with my hair. “While I was in college, I had girls throwing themselves at me left and right, making my situation more difficult. I learned to keep my head down and focus only on studies when I wasn’t at home with Linc and Gwen. It was that or go insane.”

The fact that he’d been sexually repressed for so long angered me. However, that meant I would enjoy every minute of working it out of his system.

I brushed that aside for now.

“Any close calls?”

“What’s with the inquisition?” he asked, his forehead scrunched. “Are you trying to find a flaw or something?”

“No. Just curious.”

It had started out as wanting to know for my peace of mind, but that had changed somewhere between then and now. After hearing what he had to say, any doubts I had disappeared, and I wanted to know only out of curiosity.

I explained, “You’re a very sexy man, Ben – I could only imagine the women that chased you. There had to be many very beautiful ones. I’m surprised one didn’t corner you and seduce you.”

“Even when I was with Gwen’s sister, I was a one-woman type of guy.” He wrinkled his nose. “I find cheating abhorrent.”

That eased my mind tremendously.

Still.

“How did you do it for so long?” I questioned, amazed by his self-control.

“I’m an overachiever,” he replied, smirking.

I narrowed my eyes. “What does that even mean?”

“I have a very one-track mind, and when set out to accomplish something, nothing stands in my way. I put my all into it. That was how it was for me. I never allowed myself to notice any of the women. Even after our divorce was final, because I was in that mindset for so long, I was stuck there.”

“I find that hard to believe,” I commented, thrown.

He hadn’t slept with anyone other than Gwen in how long?

How was it possible?

Wait!

Holy shit.

That meant I was the first woman since her.

I wasn’t sure if I felt privileged or scared that he’d get a taste of freedom and go on a screwing-spree. Nevertheless, he said he didn’t like cheating, so I was going to trust in that.

Ben interrupted my musing. “You were the first woman I noticed in a very long time, Samantha.” My tummy did a summersault. “I wasn’t over exaggerating when I said you blindsided me. You have a brilliance inside you that even a blind man could see. I was powerless against you as soon as you cleared your voice at me.”

That had to be the sweetest thing anyone had ever said to me.

“Ben…” I whispered, at a loss for words.

I was pleased to hear that he was equally as effected as me when we first met. I smiled at the memory of first laying eyes on him. I made a complete fool out of myself, but it had got me to this point, so I wasn’t worried about it.

Uncomfortable with the line of conversation, Ben cleared his throat and changed the subject. “Back to your question – the way I knew how to do that to you was because of my research. Maybe it was the lack of sex that did it, or perhaps it was the doctor in me, but I decided that I wanted to know everything there was to know about the female anatomy, including how to stimulate maximum pleasure, for when I finally left her.”

I shook my head, blown away by this man. “That had to be some research, Doctor.”

Ben smirked, his eyes not as dim as they were now that we were on better ground. “It was that.”

“So you’re tellin’ me you have a big bag of tricks at your disposal?” I teased, more than ready to try all of them.

“Maybe,” he admitted.

“Sounds fun.”

He tweaked my bare nipple, eliciting a quiver. Seeing my response, he rolled me onto my back and covered my body with his. I could feel his arousal against my thigh already.

Oh, lordy.

Ben stared down at me, the color of his eyes brightening with promise. “Care to find out how fun?”

“Oh, I’ve already experienced some,” I taunted, flashing him an innocent smile. “I know you’re good for it.”

“Is that so?” he questioned, licking his lips.

I followed his tongue with rapt attention, a fire building in my core. “Yes,” I breathed.

He ghosted a finger from my lips all the way down until he stopped at the top of my sex. He tugged on my short patch of hair. “So you wouldn’t want to try more?”

“I wouldn’t want you to get a big head.”

Arrogantly, he whispered, “Too late.”

I chuckled quietly. “True.”

I had to give him that.

Taking me off guard, Ben grabbed his cock and skimmed the blunt tip down my slit. I sucked in a harsh breath. He used that as his opportunity to slip his tongue between my lips and kiss me.

I thought our kiss would be wild and playful, like our banter, but I was wrong. This kiss was slow and languid, filled with a sense of devotion. Instead of words, Ben conveyed his emotions, his every desire and affection, by pouring it into me. It was a promise for more, that this was only the beginning of something that would change me forever.

I think I fell a little bit more for him by that kiss. Not all the way but almost.

I opened for him more, raking my fingers through his hair, and wrapped my legs around his thighs to draw him closer.

Ben continued to rub himself against my clit, heightening my excitement. I didn’t care about foreplay, though – I was already drenched for him. But it wasn’t only that. I needed to feel him. I wanted him inside me, reestablishing our connection, when I came again.

“Now, honey,” I whispered into his mouth. I broke our kiss and turned my head, sinking my teeth into his shoulder. “I need you now.”

Instead of acknowledging my request, he painted my neck with open-mouth kisses and persisted to stroke my sex with his.

“Ben, please,” I begged.

Pausing, he leaned back and met my gaze with smoldering eyes. “I’m still ramped up from earlier – I won’t last long. Plus, I’ve been dreaming about this for weeks. I want to make it good for you.”

My lips curved at his thoughtfulness and honesty – that admission had to be a hit to his manhood. “It will be good for me,” I promised. “I just miss feelin’ you inside.”