Feels Like Summertime (16 page)

I
walk
with wary steps down the hallway, knowing that I’m going to bump into Laura and I won’t know what to say to her. I won’t know how to explain what Jake is to me and how we came to be together before they were even divorced. I have no idea how to talk to the woman that Jake used to love, the woman he will always have a history with.

I walk into the kitchen to find my dad bouncing Hank on his shoulder while Hank alternates screaming with trying to suck on Dad’s face. “Please take this thing,” he pleads as soon as he sees me. “Or I’m going to have to explain to Adam why I have hickeys all over my chin.” He uncovers his shoulder so I can see it. “Look at this. He tried to suck on my shoulder.”

“Won’t be the first time I’ve seen you with a hickey,” I taunt, and I hold my arms out for my baby. He’s in full-on screaming mode by now. “Where’s Laura?”

He nods toward the porch. She’s sitting in a chair facing the water, holding her baby as she feeds her. “I think I’ll join her.”

“Fred and Mr. Jacobson went to set up the grill and start unloading the carts with the burgers and stuff. Send Jake down there when he comes
out of your room
.” He stares hard at me.

“Dad,” I say on a heavy sigh, “we were just talking.”

“Yeah, sure you were.” He snorts out a laugh. “I wasn’t born yesterday.” He passes me two bottles of water, tucking them between my free arm and my chest. “Besides, Jake has good intentions.”

“How do you know what Jake’s intentions are?”

“He came to see me yesterday.” He pops a piece of cheese into his mouth and grins around it. Hank is screaming so loudly that I can barely hear Dad. “Go feed that thing,” he says. “I can’t think with all that noise.”

“Will you at least tell me later what he came to talk with you about?”

He rocks his head back and forth like he’s thinking about it. “Maybe,” he finally says with a grin. Then he sticks his fingers in his ears, grimaces, and I know this conversation is over.

I grab one of Hank’s thin blankets and go out to the porch. I lean over so Laura can take a bottle of water from me. “Thanks,” she says with a smile. “It’s really beautiful here,” she murmurs, staring out over the water.

I sit down to feed Hank and, finally, quiet settles around us. “It’s my favorite place on earth.”

“Jake always liked it here, too. He talked about it all the time.”

I wonder if he talked about me. I shake that thought away.

“He used to tell me stories about the crazy things he did with you and Freddy.”

I smile. “We had some really good times.”

“There’s some famous bridge near here?”

“Oh, wow, I haven’t thought of that in a really long time.”

“He said you guys all jumped off it.”

“If Mr. Jacobson knew we jumped off the Branson Ferry Bridge, he’d kill all of us, and he’d make it a slow and painful death involving toothbrushes and bathhouses.” I shudder. Thank God he never found out.

“Where is it?”

“About two miles from here. We walked in the dead of night to get there, because someone had told us a story around the campfire the night before, about a man who died there. Jumping off the bridge had become a stupid ‘rite of passage’ thing that kids around here did. Freddy was determined he wasn’t going to do it, but Jake just jumped right off. I remember standing there at the railing looking down, wondering if he was going to come up. Then his head popped up from the water and he started to laugh.”

“Jake was always fearless, then?” Laura shakes her head. “That’s one thing I won’t miss, wondering if he’s going to come home at the end of the day.”

“Is his job dangerous?”

“No more than any police officer. But his hobbies, they’re even worse. He jumps out of planes, he flies those big one-person kites…” Her voice trails off. “I can’t remember what they’re called. Anyway,” she says, “he’s always had a bit of a wild side. I never could keep up with him.” She stares at the placid lake waters. “Do you love him?” she asks quietly.

I nod my head. “I think so. I didn’t expect to, but I couldn’t help it.”

“Freddy told me your husband died. I’m so sorry.”

I suck in a breath. “Me too. I wasn’t really looking for love. But I’m glad it found me.”

Laura stares at me as we both sit and feed our children, and then we go to the grill area to see if the burgers are done yet. I’m getting hungry.

Freddy and Jake are standing over the grill, each with a beer in his hand and several empty bottles stacked up next to them. They’re chatting and talking, and I stop to watch them.

“They seem to have gotten over their issues,” Laura says.

“I doubt they’ve gotten over it. They’ve just decided to move past it.”

Mr. Jacobson barks at them both. “Get away from my grill,” he mumbles. “You’re making a mockery of my good reputation.”

“I don’t remember you having a good reputation, Mr. Jacobson,” Freddy blurts out.

Mr. Jacobson whacks the back of Freddy’s arm with a dirty, greasy spatula. “You had a bug on you,” he says. He gives the spatula to Freddy so he can rinse it off with the hose.

“Ow,” Freddy complains, rubbing the offended spot. “Come and kiss it for me, Jake,” he says. Then he turns the hose on Jake and sprays him.

Jake looks around and the only thing he can find to get back at Freddy with is the great big ketchup bottle. So he opens it up, turns it toward Freddy, and gives it a squeeze.

“Boys,” Mr. Jacobson starts to say.

But they’re both young enough and drunk enough that they don’t care. Freddy sprays Mr. Jacobson with the hose and Jake shoots him with the ketchup. Mr. Jacobson isn’t the type to take it sitting down, though, and pretty soon, it’s a food fight of epic proportions, and Mr. Jacobson is winning, hands down. The whole campground has stopped to watch. Freddy and Jake finally give up once Mr. Jacobson is sitting on them; he has taken away the hose and the ketchup, and he pelts them both with them.

“Enough!” Jake cries.

“Stop! I give up!” Freddy yells over his laughter.

“I’m too old for this,” Mr. Jacobson grunts as he rolls off Jake and lets Freddy’s leg go.

“You’re only as old as you feel, Pop,” Jake says with a chuckle.

“I have sperm in my nut sack older than you, boy. Not to mention the dirt between my toes.”

“Ew,” Laura says.

Mr. Jacobson turns his fake glare on Laura, but Laura doesn’t know him well enough to know it’s fake. “Girl, if you ever became intimately acquainted with my nut sack, you would not be saying
ew
.”

Laura swallows hard.

“C’mon, Pop, quit talking about your nut sack in front of the women.”

“Why are you four still here?” Mr. Jacobson asks. He glares at us all.

“We’re helping,” Jake says petulantly.

“Helping make my beer disappear,” Mr. Jacobson grumbles. Then he turns the hose toward them and puts his finger on the trigger. “You need some help getting cleaned up?”

“No!” Jake and Freddy yell in unison. They both back away, but Jake snags a six-pack of beer from the cooler, first.

“I’ll expect to see both of you tomorrow morning at seven at the bathhouse. Bring your toothbrushes.”

“Aw, man,” Freddy complains. He shoves Jake’s shoulder. “See what you did.”

“You fucked my wife,” Jake mumbles at him.

“That’s your last shot with that particular comment,” Freddy warns.

Jake nods, sticks out his ketchup-covered hand and Freddy takes it.

“Do you think we can be friends again?” Freddy suddenly asks Jake as they pump hands.

“Good possibility,” Jake says.

“Good,” Freddy says quietly. “Because I really miss you.”

Jake grins. “Same here.”

“I’ll race you to the lake,” Freddy says.

Before Jake can even respond, Freddy takes off running for the dock. Jake is right behind him, and they both dive into the water at the same time, at the same angle, with the same amount of speed.

“Have they always been this competitive?” Laura asks.

“Oh, this is nothing,” I say, as we follow them to the water’s edge, where Laura puts Patty’s feet in the water while Jake and Freddy try to dunk one another. “They used to be worse.”

“What could be worse?” Laura asks.

“Oh, imagine that ketchup fight with ice cream, chocolate syrup, and all the fixings of a sundae.”

“That sounds kind of yummy, actually,” Laura says.

“It does, doesn’t it,” I reply. Then we laugh together.

“I’m glad we got to meet,” Laura says.

“Me too,” I say. I want Freddy to be happy.

Freddy gets out of the lake, but Jake stays treading water at the end of the dock. “Come and join me, Katie,” he calls.

“What do I get out of it if I do?” I call back.

“Me!” he returns.

I pass Hank, who is sound asleep, to Freddy and shuck off my t-shirt and shorts, since I’d put a bathing suit on under my clothes earlier. “Watch my baby, Freddy.”

“Like he’s my own,” Freddy says, and they walk back to their cabin.

Jake pulls me to him when I get to him in the water. “I’m going to need another shower,” I say.

“Pop left condoms on my bed for me.”

“Oh, my God!” I cry. “I found a box in my bedside table!”

“Pop strikes again,” Jake says, and then his arms slide around and he pulls me close.

“I’m glad you made up with Freddy,” I say.

“Me, too.” He nuzzles my neck. “I’ve missed him.”

“Tonight, after the kids are asleep, do you want to come to my room?”

“Hmm…he hums. “What are we going to be doing in your room?”

“We could play cards,” I suggest.

“Cards? I don’t think so.” He cups my breast on the water and gives it a squeeze.

“We could build a house out of Popsicle sticks.”

He shakes his head. “Nah.”

“We could play hide the salami.”

He pulls back so he can look at my face, his brows lifting toward the heavens. “You have been spending entirely too much time with Pop.”

“You don’t like my idea?” I bat my wet lashes at him.

“I love your idea. I’m just not sure if I want to think of salami when I finally get to be inside you.”

I wrap my legs around his waist. “Would you rather think about my awesome flower petals opening right up and taking you inside?”

He arches his hips, bumping against me, and my belly does that twisty thing that only happens with him. “I can still taste you on my tongue.”

“My awesome flower, you mean?” I laugh when he growls against my neck and comes up to nibble my ear.

Suddenly, bodies fly over our heads and hit the lake. I recognize Adam and Dad, three of my children, and then there’s a sixth splash as Sally hits the water.

“Sally can swim?” I ask Jake.

“I have no idea. I’ve spent exactly five minutes with that dog since I got him.”

Sally swims a circle around Trixie, sticking right with her. “He’s a good dog, Jake,” I tell him. “When we get married, I’m going to adopt him.”

Jake sucks in a breath.

“Too soon?” I ask, going stiff in his arms.

He pulls my head back to look into my eyes. “Not too soon,” he says, and then he kisses me, right there in front of everybody.

I
lie
in bed staring at the ceiling for what feels like hours. It could be minutes. It could be days. All I know is that I’m not with Katie, and
where she is
is where I desperately want to be. I want to be inside her. I want to be on top of her. I want to wrap her around me and never, ever let her go.

From down the hallway, Hank lets out that tiny little wail he does every night when he wakes up around midnight. It usually startles me out of my sleep every time he does it; not because it’s awful or annoying, but because I listen for it every single night. Even with the alarms I put on the doors and the windows, I still worry about them, and I suppose I’ll worry about them for the rest of my life.

I imagine Katie getting out of bed all bleary-eyed, shuffling over to his bassinette and scooping him up. Then she’ll sit down with him and bare her breast. Since she’s in her room, she won’t worry about covering up. It’ll be her and Hank and the quiet of the night as she feeds him and rocks him back to sleep in my mother’s old rocking chair. In my fantasies, I’m the one who hears him cry out in the night, and I get up, get him, and take him to her. I’m the one who bares her breast for him and I wait until he’s done feeding so I can put him back to bed.

I want to ease some of Katie’s burden.

But even more than that, I want to fuck her.

I want to sink deep inside her, steal her breath, and not give it back until she’s clenching around me. I’ll pulse deep inside her, and she’ll tighten and cry out my name.

I roll over and pound my fist into my pillow. I have never wanted anyone or anything as badly as I want her. And I want her forever. I don’t want her for a moment, or for a short time, or for an experience. I want her always. I want her early morning and her late night. I want her midday and I want her bedtime. I just want her.

I lie there waiting, counting the minutes until I can go and crawl into bed with her, until I can be inside her.

Screw it. I’m just going to go to her. I toss the covers back and just as I do, my door opens with a soft
snick
. I look up and Katie steps into my room, closing the door softly behind her. She leans her forehead against the door and presses her palms against the wood. In one hand, she’s holding the receiving end of the wireless baby monitor.

“Katie,” I say quietly as I go to stand next to her. She’s wearing an oversized t-shirt and a tiny pair of sleep shorts. Her dark hair is plaited in a loose braid over her shoulder.

“I was going crazy waiting for you,” she says quietly, and I hear the tremor in her voice.

I press my front against her back, and she leans into me, molding her body to mine. “And I’ve been lying here waiting for you all night. Is Hank asleep?” I whisper, as I kiss the side of her neck. She shivers in my arms, and I see goose bumps rise on hers. I take the baby monitor from her hand and lay it on my dresser.

“Yes,” she whispers, and then she spins in my arms. “He’ll sleep for a few hours.” Her hands wrap around my neck as she pulls my face down to hers.

I lift her shirt over her head, and then pull her sleep shorts down so she can step out of them. She holds onto my shoulders until I stand back up. Then I scoop her up and hitch her hips around my waist. “Unfortunately, the first time isn’t going to take a few hours. It’ll be minutes. Seconds, even.”

“Oh, thank God,” she says. She holds tightly to my shoulders until I lay her on my bed. I stare down at her perfect body, made even more perfect by the birth of children, the passage of time, and my absolute love for her. “I don’t want to wait, Jake,” she says. She rolls over and her bare bottom lifts ever so slightly. “I don’t want that stare-into-my-eyes kind of sex, Jake. I want quick and raw and hot.” She buries her face in her arms and her round bottom clenches. “Fuck me, Jake.”

I reach into my nightstand drawer and retrieve a condom. “Yes, ma’am,” I say. I start to tear the package open with my teeth, and a tiny little knock sounds on my door.

Katie squeals and rolls to the edge of the bed, and then she drops down onto the floor with a
thump
. She tugs my covers until they fall onto the floor with her.

“Shit,” I grit out. I pull my shirt back over my head and put my pajama pants back on, and then I crack the door ever so slightly.

Trixie stands in my doorway. She has a blanket clutched in one fist and her thumb is stuck solidly in her mouth. “There’s a noise under my bed,” she says around her thumb.

I drop down to crouch in front of her. “What kind of noise?”

“It’s the blue raccoon. He wants to steal my covers.” She holds up her blanket. “See?”

“Do you need some blue raccoon spray?”

She nods and tucks her blanket next to her cheek. “Yes, please.”

“Go back to bed,” I say. “I’ll be right there.”

I close my door, drop to my knees on my bed and crawl across to look down at Katie. “You okay down there?”

She uncovers her head and blows a lock of hair from her eyes. “Yes. I’ll just wait right here.”

I chuckle and scurry back across the bed. “I’ll be right back.”

I go and tuck Trixie back in bed, give Sally a pat on the head, spray some blue raccoon spray, and then lean down next to Trixie’s bed. I pull the covers up under her chin. “All better?”

She nods and snuggles deeper into her pillow. “Yes. All better.”

“Sleep tight,” I say.

“Don’t let the bed bugs bite,” she replies.

I check on Alex, shove his foot back onto the bed, and leave their door cracked behind me as I step back out.

“Hey, Jake?” Trixie calls.

I turn back.

“I love you,” she says quietly.

My heart clenches. “I love you too, Trix,” I say. I pull the door almost shut, leaving about an inch of space.

I fell in love with Katie’s kids about the same time I fell in love with her.

But first things first.

I have a naked woman hiding behind my bed on the floor. And I really want to get back to her.

I close my bedroom door and crawl across the bed again. Then I cross my hands and lay my chin on them. “You still awake down there?”

She throws the covers down from her face again. Her eyes skim my chest. “Why do you have clothes on?” she asks.

“Well, there was an issue with a blue raccoon and I had to go deal with it. But now I’m back. Where were we?” I tap my temple and pretend to think about it. “Were we playing cards?”

“Jake,” she says, nearly choking on her laughter. “If you don’t come down here and fuck me soon, I’m going to...”

I smile and stare down at her. “You’re going to what?”

“I’m going to come up there and fuck
you
,” she says.

And that is all it takes. The erection I lost when Trixie knocked is back in full force.

I roll onto my back, kick my pajama pants off, pull my shirt over my head, roll a condom down my length, and wait.

Katie huffs and gets to her feet. She stands beside the bed with her hands on her hips. She stares at my junk. “You know,” she says, “this is the first time I’ve actually seen your dick.”

I lift my arms to rest the back of my head in my hands. “You’re impressed, right?”

She crawls across the bed on all fours. “I’d be more impressed if you were inside me.”

She straddles my hips and rests her palms flat on my chest, so that her weight is balanced on her hands.

“That can be arranged,” I tell her.

She leans down and kisses me, and then she reaches between us and takes me in her fist. She pulls my dick away from my belly, until it’s standing straight up, and then she sinks slowly down on top of me. I watch as she takes me inside, using my thumbs to spread her open, and as I disappear inside her, I have to shut my eyes to keep from coming.

Her hair has come loose from its braid and it’s hanging down around her creamy shoulders. Her full breasts bounce a little as she sinks down and then rises up.

“Wait, wait, wait,” I say. I hold on to her hips, squeezing tightly.

She stops moving. “What’s wrong?” she asks, her brow furrowing.

“We have to slow it down a little,” I warn her. “I’m going to come.”

“Oh,” she breathes. Then she grins, and I swear I love her a little more right then. She starts to ride me, her pussy wrapped tight around my cock. “You totally should, Jake. Then we can do it again.”

I pull her down so she lies on my chest, hook my arm around her, and flip us both over. I hitch her leg up by my hip, and then press it to her chest. “Is this okay?” I ask. I don’t wait for her answer as I push fast and deep inside, until I’m buried to the hilt.

Katie cries out, and buries her mouth against my arm to muffle those tiny little noises. Her eyelids flutter closed and her mouth falls open, and God, she’s so fucking beautiful.

She’s tight and hot and slippery inside, and I pull out and push back in, burying myself deep in her again. She rocks forward in the bed with every stroke, holding tightly to my forearm with one hand as she pulls me into her with her other hand on my ass.

“Open your eyes,” I tell her.

She shakes her head. “I can’t.” A tear rolls down her temple.

I stop and let her leg fall down around my hip. I bracket her face with my hands, but she still won’t open her eyes and look at me. “Did I hurt you?”

She shakes her head, but another tear escapes.

“Then why are you crying?” I ask.

“You wouldn’t understand,” she says.

“Try me.” I press my lips to hers and she kisses me back. I’m still buried deep inside her, and her walls give me a little squeeze. “Look at me, Katie. Talk to me.”

“Just finish, Jake,” she says. “Just finish. I’m fine.”

I will not
just finish
. “If you think I’m the type of man who will
just finish
while you’re crying, you don’t know me at all.” I pull out of her and fall onto the bed. She rolls to face me. I kiss the tip of her nose. “Is this about him?”

She smiles softly at me and shakes her head, nibbling on her lower lip. “No, it’s not about him.”

Suddenly, I don’t know which
him
we’re talking about. “Your husband?” I ask tentatively.

She shakes her head. “No.” She wipes her eyes. “I just never thought…” She sniffles and stops talking.

“Never thought what?”

“I never thought I’d be lucky enough to fall in love a second time. I mean, really… How many people find it twice?”

“You think you found it twice?”

She nods. “I love you, Jake.”

I kiss her lips softly. “I love you too.”

She wipes her nose. “I’m sorry I cried. I was just feeling so damn grateful, and so full of it.”

“Well, you were full of something,” I say. I hitch her leg up over my hip and my dick settles in her cleft. I rock forward until it brushes her clit.

“Do you think we can keep this?” she asks.

“Define
this
.”

“This…feeling, this… I don’t know how to explain it.”

I roll her onto her back and settle between her thighs, nudging gently until I can slide inside. Her legs fall open wide, cradling me against her. “Yeah, I think we can keep it. It’s real. It’s not going anywhere.”

“You promise?” she asks, and tears well up again.

“I swear it.”

She holds her eyes closed tightly for a moment, and then she opens them and stares into mine. “Make love to me, Jake.”

I slam into her, and she takes me to the hilt. I kiss her to quiet her, and she whimpers against my lips with each deep stroke into her body.

“I’m going to…” She gasps. Her lips fall open and her sweet breath warms my chin. “Oh, God, Jake,” she says and then she comes apart around me. She squeezes me tight, shuddering as she takes me in, and when she relaxes around me, I come too. Deep inside her, with her, on top of her… God, it’s just
her
.

“Jesus,” I say, as I let my weight fall on top of her. She pulls my lips to hers and kisses me. “That was amazing.”

A knock sounds on my door, and I drop my face into Katie’s neck. “Oh, my God,” I whisper. “Not right now.”

“Jake,” a voice calls out. “Do you know where my mom is?”

Katie shoves my shoulder. “That’s Gabby. Move.”

Katie covers my naked body, grabs my robe off the door and shrugs into it. She opens the door for Gabby, and when she turns back to look at me a moment later, her face goes completely white. “Jake,” she says, “Gabby thinks someone is outside her window.”

I try to shake the post coital laziness from my brain, dispose of the condom, and get dressed. Then I get my gun out of the locked box I put in my closet last week, and check to be sure it’s loaded.

“What are you doing, Jake?” Katie asks.

“I’m going to see who’s outside.”

Katie grabs my arm. “Don’t go outside.”

“It’s fine, Katie,” I tell her. I kiss her quickly. Then I let myself outside.

I walk quietly to the window, and get out my small flashlight.

And my blood runs cold. All the flowers under Gabby’s window have been stomped flat. Someone
has
been here.

Aside from Pop, there’s only one other person in the world I would trust to protect my family. Despite everything that happened, he will protect them.

I hurry to Fred’s cabin and knock on the door. He opens it a crack, and I say, “I need your help.”

Together, Fred and I search the campground, the lake area, and part of the woods.

While we search, I tell Fred the story of Cole and explain what’s going on.

“He’s gone,” I tell Fred. “At least for tonight.”

“He’ll be back,” Fred replies. “What are you going to do?”

I shake my head. “I have no idea.”

“Well,” Fred says, “when I go quail hunting, I don’t just sit there and wait for them to fly up so I can shoot them. I flush them out.”

“What do you mean?”

“What does Cole want more than anything?”

A shiver runs up my spine. “Katie.”

“So, you plan the biggest wedding you can, set a date, put announcements in the papers here and at home, and then you wait. Flush him out. He’ll show up. He won’t let her marry you. Not without a fight.”

Katie walks up behind me. The moonlight shines on her face. “Hey, Katie?” I say.