Authors: Kailin Gow
Fever (17 page)
Is it over between us? I saw the way he reacted. I saw his face in that moment. Does he think that I chose Grayson over him? Does he not want anything more to do with me? That thought physically hurts. The idea that I could have pushed Grayson aside because I love Jack so much, only for Jack to decide that he doesn’t love me is too much. It’s too much even for me to concentrate on my work properly. Several times now, I’ve read reports or had meetings, only to realize afterwards that I haven’t taken any of it in.
I don’t know what my advisors and aides must think. They probably think that I really am the teenage girl I appear to be, and that I shouldn’t be dealing with the running of the country if I can’t even deal with something like this. Yet the truth is, no matter how old I appeared to be when it happened, Jack refusing to talk to me would stop me in my tracks.
“Madam President?” Liza has come into the Oval Office, waiting in front of my desk while I snap out of my thoughts. I’m staring down at a report on economic output that I should be taking very seriously indeed, but haven’t been able to concentrate on.
“What is it, Liza?” That comes out harsher than I intended. Anyone who has intruded on me and my thoughts of Jack in the last couple of days has gotten the same, but I realize now how bad it must make me look. These people don’t deserve it. They’ve kept the country running while I’ve been away in the past. They shouldn’t have to deal with this as well.
“I’m sorry, Liza,” I say with a sigh. “I know I can’t have been much fun to work with, the past couple of days. What do you need?”
“Your presence is required in the rose gardens,” Liza says, with a slight smile. Is that because of the apology?
“In the rose gardens? I don’t remember an appointment for now. Certainly not one there. What’s going on?”
Liza shakes her head. “I think I’m going to have to risk my job by refusing to answer that one, Madam President.”
I look at her a little longer, trying to make some kind of sense of it. Liza reaches out to touch my shoulder.
“Just go,” she says. “Trust me.”
I stand up, deciding that whatever the situation is, it can’t be any harder to deal with than the ones I’ve already dealt with. After all, between us, Jack, Johnny, Grayson and I have stopped the Fever, prevented another apocalypse, and dealt with Wilson Hammond. Next to that, almost anything is simple. Though it generally involves a lot more meetings.
Liza leads the way down to the rose gardens, a couple of secret service agents flanking us on the way down. Even that has me thinking about Jack and the way he would stay with me, protecting me through everything. The times when I’ve been most lost have been the times when he hasn’t been near me. I don’t think I can bear this now. What if he never agrees to speak to me? What if he doesn’t believe me when I tell him that I was breaking things off with Grayson? After all the times Grayson and I
have
kissed, would I believe it if I were Jack?
I shake my head, trying to focus on the meeting ahead of me. It must be pretty important to get an unscheduled slot with me. Liza is pretty ferocious when it comes to protecting time in my calendar. Apparently, merely being in possession of a functioning time machine doesn’t change anything when it comes to the amount of time I have available. I realize I’m thinking about nonsense to keep from thinking about anything else.
Liza takes me as far as the gate to the rose gardens. Even the secret service agents stay behind there. That’s unusual. I step in, thinking for a moment about how beautiful the evening is, and how good the garden looks right now. In fact, it looks better than good. There are fairy lights set up around the garden, shining like miniature stars among the roses and making them seem to glow translucently in the fading light. It’s such a beautiful, calm space. When did I last get the time to come down here?
I walk through the gardens, up towards a gazebo set to look out over the small lake in the grounds. It’s all so serene and still. More peaceful than I feel right now. I sit down in the gazebo, looking out and trying to let some of that peace flow through me. I should feel peaceful. It’s over. It’s done. Yet that isn’t how the world works. Not really.
I hear the light tread of footsteps nearby and look up. Jack’s there. He’s wearing a grey suit that is cut perfectly to emphasize his toned, muscular frame. He stands so elegantly. So perfectly poised. He looks almost exaokssize="+0ctly the way he looked the first time I saw him in his apartment, dressed as a Fader.
He’s breathtaking. Maybe it’s just not seeing him for a couple of days, or maybe it’s how much I want things to be right between us, but he looks perfect standing there, his features chiseled, those pale, pale eyes, on me. As always with Jack, I can’t even begin to guess at what he’s feeling.
At least until he moves closer, tilting my head up so that he can kiss me.
It’s a kiss like coming home. A kiss that I’ve been imagining for almost two days straight now. Jack’s mouth is on mine and it’s all I can do to hold myself back from pulling him down beside me in the gazebo. Jack seems to sense that too, because he puts his hands gently on my shoulders, pulling me to my feet before stepping back.
“Celes,” he says, “I’ve been doing a lot of thinking. I’ve been thinking about my father, and all the regrets he had when my mother passed away. I’ve been thinking about everything we’ve done. I’ve been thinking about you, too.”
“Jack…”
“I don’t want any regrets,” Jack says. “We’ve dealt with Hammond and the rest of it, but we have no way of knowing what might be coming tomorrow. If I walk away from you now, I’ll regret that for the rest of my life. We might not get a chance to make it right.”
“I love you, Jack,” I say.
“And I love you. I’ve never known a time when I
haven’t
loved you. We found each other even when we didn’t know who we were. We fell in love again without knowing it. That’s what matters.”
“I was saying goodbye to Grayson, Jack,” I say. “I was telling him that I love you too much to ever be with him.”
“I know,” Jack says. “He told me. That’s why I’ve spent most of the last couple of days trying to make this perfect.”
“You’ve been doing
what
?” I ask. “I thought you were angry with me. I thought you hated me.”
“I could never hate you,” Jack promises me. He smiles. “And as for making me angry… well, you’ve managed to do that plenty of times when you’ve put yourself at risk. I haven’t run away from you then, have I?”
“Then what…” I begin. I think about what he has just said. “What were you making perfect?”
Jack takes my hand. “We’ve done a lot of things,” he says. “And we’ve bent a lot of rules doing them. I think that one more won’t hurt. I might be your head of security, but I also love you too much to just be an occasional thing for you. We belong together, and I want to be with you completely. Forever.”
“What are you saying?” I ask Jack breathlessly. I think I know, but I need to hear it from him.
Jack falls to one knee, taking a box out of his pocket. He opens it to reveal a ring that shines with a fire that matches the one within us.
“This is where you’ve been the last couple of days?” I ask.
Jack nods. “Will you marry me, Celes? Will you make me the happiest man in this or any other time?”
I freeze there as he actually says it. I know what I want, and what I want to say, but right now, getting the words out is hard. It’s hard to say how much I love him. How much I need him. Because words just don’t seem to do it justice right now. Nothing seems to. I stare at Jack’s features. So strong, so handsome. So sure, even in the face of the greatest dangers. The kind of man who could be beside me through anything.
It’s about more than that too, I realize, as a little of the confidence slips out of Jack’s expression. There are lots of action men out there, but Jack is the one whose sensitive side is there too. He loves me, purely and absolutely. He’d do anything for me. I think back to the times we shared in the apartment together, pretending to be boyfriend and girlfriend. To all the times we’ve spent when bullets haven’t been flying towards us. Those have been the times when I’ve seen the real Jack Simple.
And I love him.
“Celes?” Jack says, still down on one knee.
I reach down, pulling him up and kissing him softly. Gently. I whisper it into his ear, just between the two of us.
“Yes. Yes, Jack, I’ll marry you.”
Jack pulls back just enough to slide the ring onto my finger. It’s perfect, a little like Jack. It seems so hard and cold on the outside, yet in just the right light, I can see the fire inside it. It’s beautiful. Though not quite as beautiful as he is. I don’t think anyone is.
Jack takes me in his arms then. “If we’re going to be together,” he says, “then I don’t think we should waste any more time, do you?”
I sm ove ile at him. “What exactly do you have in mind, Jack Simple?”
He answers me with a deep kiss that seems to set my body on fire. That’s good, because it’s pretty much what I had in mind too. To start with, anyway.
*****
This concludes the FADE Series. Thank you for taking this ride through FADE with me and with many other readers. I hope you’d enjoyed FADE as much as I enjoyed writing it.
If you’d enjoyed this series, let me, my publishers, and other readers know by writing a review. Who knows, there may be another book in the future…
For updates on whether there is a spin-off or more books in the future for FADE, visit KailinGowBooks.com and sign up for new releases.
A FINAL WORD
Reasons Why?
I get asked this all the time, why do you interact with your readers so much?
1) The answer is simply because I see many of my readers as friends.
I’m a reader, too, and over the years, I’ve gotten to know some of you through Facebook, Twitter, or even at events I’m participating in. You have read my books, understood the story, and have come to love the characters in these stories as much as I do.
Over the years, I’ve gotten to know many of my readers. I share your pain when you lose a love one, congratulate you on victories, go through your birthdays and dramas at home and work. So you see, in other words, a lot of my readers have become friends of mine. You read my books, and even understand me like a friend understands a friend.
2) I know how reading can be time-consuming so I am pretty happy when a reader Facebook me and tells me she just read one of my books and she knows she'll be one of my biggest fans. I can't tell you how i ovtime-ncredibly touched I am when someone tells me this. It literally brings tears to my eyes.
Not only does this feel incredible, and I am truly honored, but I want my readers to know from the bottom of my heart, this:
3) You Make Me, an Author, feel Warm and Fuzzy, too!
When you love my books and even reach out to me to let me know how much you love my books or that it has touched you in some way, and even write a review about it, you can’t imagine how happy that makes me. I’m only human you know. It makes me feel good about what I'm working hard for.
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mbria">EXCERPT FROM
DESIRE
By Kailin Gow
*****************************
Prologue
Arcadia, Earth – Year 3010
P
erfection. That was how best to described the day. Blue skies with the hint of lilac and buttercream, fat fluffy white clouds gliding by, added to the beautiful day. It was the perfect way to end a sunny school day. With my hand nestled warmly in Liam’s, I walked at his side, my face tilted up to the sun, my nostrils breathing in the fresh air that smelled like Spring lavenders and fresh linen. The fragrant air made me think of Spring formals, garden parties, and outdoor barbeques. The day could not be more enjoyable if it’d been planned that way. If I had not grown up anywhere else besides the state of Arcadia, I would have thought this was the way it always should be everywhere. I have lived in Arcadia for all my life, and have never known the skies to shine blue and clear otherwise. The only times Arcadia had ever experience dark skies and foul weather was rare indeed. This was just another typical day for a citizen of Arcadia. Perfect like the shiny spotless signpost on the corner of the street ahead was: Main Street, Arcadia.