Authors: V. K. Powell
Ben and Imani had been watching the exchange in silence and now their gazes rested on Zak. “I’m sorry. I can’t.” She spun and walked away.
Sara started after her, but Imani raised her hand to stop her. “I will go.”
“She is the most stubborn, inflexible woman I’ve ever met. What’s the big deal? If it’s the money, I’ll pay her more.”
Sara asked the question to no one in particular, but Ben, shuffling his bare feet in the dusty ground, replied. “Ebony does not wish your money. She wishes you safe.”
“I’ll be safer if she’s with me. At least I know her, a little, and feel comfortable with her.”
Ben’s glance shifted from her to Zak, as if struggling with his thoughts. “She knows things you do not. It is safer without her.”
If Zak’s friend thought she’d be safer without her, something had evidently gone terribly wrong since they arrived. Zak’s previous objections to the job had given no hint of danger, just annoyance. She watched the exchange between Zak and Imani, though she couldn’t understand anything they were saying. At first Zak assumed a quiet conversational posture, and then her body tensed as if she had become more confrontational. A few minutes later she balled her fists at her sides and the tones became more audible and insistent. The only sound Sara could distinguish was a word Imani used and Zak repeated as they looked in her direction.
Mpenzi
.
“What does that word mean,
mpenzi
, Ben?”
He looked at the ground as though embarrassed and walked away.
*
Roger Kamau’s departure hadn’t relieved Zak’s discomfort. It was unexpected but not unwelcome. Neither his character nor his abilities impressed her. But she dreaded the discussion with Sara about his replacement. She knew Sara would ask her to stay. Zak had made her initial decision to leave quickly, in the heat of excitement and emotion. This one would require more thought, an objective threat assessment, and the thing she feared most, an honest evaluation of her feelings.
This woman already stirred up uncomfortable emotions that made no sense. Her very presence was distracting and her persistence annoying to the point of irritation. But her ability to ask for exactly what she wanted, which initially chafed, now left Zak with a pathetic-puppy-dog desire to grant her wishes. Her hard exterior shell seemed to melt in Sara’s company, which was a dangerous tendency, especially in such an unforgiving country. One idealist in their midst was too many. She needed to remain on point.
When Sara asked her to stay and said she needed her, the protector in Zak sprang to life. Just like in the plane during the thunderstorm, she wanted to say yes and shelter Sara from any harm. But in this case, she was also a threat. Wachira gave no thought to collateral damage. The look in Sara’s eyes was warm and pleading, its draw entirely too enticing.
Zak refused and walked away before Sara could spot her reservations. But Imani knew her better than Sara and saw what she tried to hide.
“Why do you refuse her, Ebony?” Imani asked.
“I’m part of the problem now. Kamau practically admitted there’s a vendetta against me. And Wachira hates me, so anyone close to me is a target. Besides, you know how hard it is for women traveling alone.”
“You never cared for this before. Take Ben, if you worry. He knows the years you missed. He needs more work.” She inched closer to Zak and lowered her voice to a whisper. “Why do you resist? She is like you. You care for her.”
It wasn’t a question. Imani saw things no one else could. She’d always had that gift. It was Imani who first realized that Zak’s feelings for her went beyond friendship. Their long discussions on walks to the river to fetch water helped Zak accept her lesbianism. But her heart had been broken as she gradually understood that because of her cultural traditions, Imani could not reciprocate. They had been lovers in every sense except the physical, constant companions, confidantes, and steadfast supporters through the years. When Zak needed to escape, she often returned to Africa and Imani.
“It’s not like that,” Zak struggled to explain. “I mean, yes, she’s like me, but—”
“Your lover,
mpenzi
?”
“No, not
mpenzi
. She has someone else.”
“You care for her. It shines in your eyes, Ebony.”
“I’m just worried about her. That’s all.” Imani’s probing gaze held Zak’s until she had to look away.
“Do not do this again. Do not separate the heart from the body. It kills too slowly.”
As Imani walked back to camp, Zak paced and tried to make a decision. She wanted to help Sara and she wanted to know her better, but was it worth risking Sara’s safety to satisfy her own selfish desires? Why did her decisions always seem to involve two choices that were just as right as they were wrong?
*
Sara watched Imani disappear into the swarm of bodies busy with morning chores, leaving Zak by the compound entrance. She paced back and forth, kicking up a cloud of dirt with each step. Turmoil radiated from her. Sara knew Zak had a tormented history. It clung to her like the orange dust of this place stuck to fresh sweat. She didn’t want to be the cause of one more problem or regret in this woman’s life. At the same time, she didn’t want to make this journey without her. Right now she felt exposed and alone in a country that offered little comfort. Zak was all she knew. And even with her frustrating, arrogant, and detached ways, she somehow made Sara feel safe. That was almost as frightening as any danger the bush presented.
She approached Zak and said, “I’m sorry. I’ll phone Randall immediately. I don’t want to cause you any more difficulty.”
The expression in Zak’s eyes as she turned to her was a mixture of pain and sadness. “It just wouldn’t be safe for me to accompany you any farther.”
“Can you at least tell me why?”
“It’s best if I don’t.”
“Then I have to assume it has something to do with Wachira. When the new guide arrives, his office will be our first stop. I need to know what I’m facing.”
Zak’s pale skin blanched whiter. “You promised.”
“I did no such thing. I said I would
try
not to engage him. But if there’s some sort of danger, he should be aware of it, don’t you think?”
“I’ve already told you, he’s part of the problem.”
Sara moved closer to Zak and stroked her arm. Zak flinched at the initial contact, then relaxed into the touch. “I need someone I can trust. Granted, I don’t know you very well, but I believe you’d honor your contract. We could play this revolving-guide game for days without finding a suitable replacement. Whatever issue you have with Wachira, I’m willing to face it with you and put the full weight of Ambrosini Philanthropic behind you.”
“I can’t ask you to do that. It’s my issue.” The cobalt blue of Zak’s eyes softened as she held Sara’s gaze. “I’d be putting you in harm’s way. I couldn’t live with that.”
“Could you live with me getting eaten by a lion or raped by a marauding band of criminals? Would that be easier? I doubt it, because you like me.”
Zak looked pained. “Don’t talk like that.”
“Then say you’ll stay on. I’m not trying to blackmail you or make you feel guilty, but if it works, I will. I’ll concede that I’m not an ideal client and I’ll even try to do better. Just, please, don’t leave me out here alone.”
Zak paced a few more laps as if considering Sara’s request. When she finally stopped in front of her, Sara held her breath. “I’ll stay under one condition.”
“Anything.”
“You must do exactly as I say with no exceptions.”
Sara didn’t suppress a wicked smile. “That sounds much more promising than I’d hoped.” Was she flirting or negotiating?
“I’m serious.”
“You usually are. Very well, I’ll do as you say.” Without thinking, she hugged Zak appreciatively and felt her body stiffen. “Sorry.” She backed away. “I’m very grateful, and I promise to
try
to be a good girl.”
“Get your gear together. We’ll leave right after breakfast. And I’d like to ask Ben to go with us. He has more recent knowledge about the area. Plus, he has a truck and we need another vehicle. Are you okay paying him?”
“Of course.” Sara paused, wondering if his sister would be joining them as well, if she possessed some talent that Zak required on the trip. The thought unsettled her in a way she didn’t want to consider. “And Imani?”
“What about her?”
“Will she accompany us too?”
“She has responsibilities here.”
“A husband and children?”
“No.” Zak headed toward the truck stacked with supplies that Kamau had brought the night before.
As she walked away, Sara tried to make sense of her feelings. She was relieved that Zak was staying on while simultaneously confused about her own insistence that Zak do so. There were probably capable men who could easily handle the job, but she wanted and, if she was honest,
needed
Zak for reasons she couldn’t articulate. Her gut simply refused to let her go, which triggered guilt. She and Rikki were lovers and she wouldn’t cheat. So why did she have this intangible connection to a woman she hardly knew? And why did Zak’s friendship with Imani seem so intimate and threatening?
Maybe the heat, dehydration, and nausea were playing tricks with her mind. At least now she had a little more time to sort through everything. Zak would be with her a few more days, and she couldn’t think of anything more pleasant than being submissive to the mysterious and attractive woman—figuratively speaking, of course.
After breakfast Sara tried to call Rikki again without success and left another message. It had been a whole day since they’d spoken, and that wasn’t like Rikki, who needed constant reassurance and stimulation. The former Sara could provide long-distance; the latter gave her reason for concern.
She said her good-byes to everyone at camp and headed toward the truck. Zak and Ben were talking in low tones, and as she rounded the corner Zak hid something behind her. “More secrets? What’ve you got there, Chambers, weapons of mass destruction?” The look on Zak’s face said it all. “Weapons? We need weapons?”
Zak produced a menacing long gun that looked like something she’d seen in a Rambo movie. It had a magazine hanging out the bottom with enough ammunition to clear the camp. Ben was holding a couple of handguns that he quickly slid inside the sash of his shuka.
“Have you ever used a weapon before?” Zak asked.
“No. Do you really think that’ll be necessary?” Sara knew her eyes were bulging in disbelief.
“I can’t take the chance. Forget you saw these. We could get in real trouble if anyone knew we had them.”
“I wonder why?” Sara mused as she tried to regulate her rapid heart rate while she heaved her luggage into the back of the truck.
Imani ran toward them waving a small leaf-wrapped package in the air. “Food for the trip.” She handed it to Ben and hugged him as they spoke softly in Swahili. Next she hugged Zak, but not with the chaste family-type hug she’d given her brother. Again, it was too close and intimate for Sara’s comfort. When they parted, she stroked Zak’s cheek and said in English, “Be well, my Ebony.” She shook Sara’s hand and wished her a safe journey. Sara wanted to be outraged but she had no right, and who could blame Imani? It wasn’t easy to cultivate the closeness these women shared. It had taken years of God knows what to forge such a bond. She was suddenly ashamed of her childish jealousy. And that’s exactly what it was: jealousy.
“Where do I sit?” Sara asked, looking back and forth between the two trucks.
Ben answered with a smile. “On the rifle, with Ebony.”
Zak clarified as she climbed into the driver’s seat of the supply truck, “He means you ride shotgun with me.”
In less than four hours they arrived at their destination in Talek Gate, a wide expanse of grassland beside the Talek River. Sara wasn’t sure how Zak knew they’d arrived since this particular plot of land looked the same as every other for miles around. But a couple of flicks on her GPS and a double check of the map seemed to convince her. The river itself resembled more of a mosquito breeding ground than an actual flowing body of water, but Sara tried to remain optimistic. At least she wouldn’t be sleeping in a dung-and-urine hut tonight.
The three of them assembled a huge tent, which was to serve as the dining hall and Ben’s sleeping quarters, while a troop of baboons protested the invasion from their perches in the acacia trees on the opposite side of the river. Sara organized supplies in the cooking area as Zak and Ben started erecting another canvas cabin, probably for sleeping, but Sara saw only one. It looked as though Zak noticed the same thing. She went to the truck and rifled through the remaining equipment.
“Damn incompetents. Where’s the other tent? I specifically asked for two large and one small one.” Ben shrugged and continued unloading the remaining supplies. “There’s not enough room in the mess hall for our stuff and both of us.”
A twinge of excitement shot down Sara’s spine as she thought, “Guess that means you’re stuck with me,” and apparently said it out loud. Both Ben and Zak turned to her. Ben nodded like that made perfect sense while Zak shook her head emphatically.
“We need to ride into Talek Town and spread the word about our construction jobs. I’ll check around and see if I can find another one.” She was obviously not happy about the idea of spending the night in the same dwelling with her.