Field of Innocence (The Euphoria Series) (8 page)

Calandra takes a small sip of the tea he poured for her. It’s bittersweet; something floral mixes with a slightly sour flavor that she can’t quite place. It warms her as she swallows it, and surprisingly she does feel a little better. She takes another sip before she places the cup back on the table in front of her.

“What is this and what does it mean?” Calandra nods her head toward the dragonfly mark on her left shoulder. “It has to mean something since everyone seems so enthralled by it.”

Jarreth pours himself another cup of tea topped off with the pink liquid and gulps it down before he starts in on his explanation.

“There was a time when Fae were allowed into the mortal realm and humans freely roamed in Faerie as well. Knowing about its existence was all that a mortal needed to be able to cross over. It was a time when the Fae and humans seemed to mix just fine, or as well as could be expected at least. There are things that some of our kind does, that doesn’t necessarily sit right with all humans. My emotion feeding for instance, and there are other things for other types of Fae. We won’t go into all the details just yet.” A flash of something changes Jarreth’s eyes to an eerie shade of gray before he continues, “Eventually, as it should have been expected to happen, one human crossed a line with the wrong faerie and things were sent into a bit of turmoil. To prevent an all-out war between our worlds, we agreed to simply stay in our land. To ensure we did so, there were limitations placed on where we could go in the mortal world. In return, humans were prevented from coming to Faerie except under certain circumstances. A faerie must now accompany them over here and it must be for good reason. What we didn’t expect upon doing this was that the absence of humans in our world would throw it off balance. Like I said before, there is no good and evil when it comes to Fae, and what we didn’t fully realize at the time was that the human interaction was what helped to keep it all balanced. After a few failed attempts of a faerie taking over to reign and keeping order, the conclusion was made that no faerie was capable of doing so. We are incapable of having the right balance to properly keep order in our own land. But no human is capable of doing so either. For one, their lives are too limited and short. Also, they don’t have the power to be able to control Faerie.” Jarreth pours himself another cup of tea and gulps it down.

Thoughts swirl through Calandra’s mind as she watches him. No Fae can rule the land anymore, but obviously they are looking for someone to balance out their world again. Humans can’t come to the world to be able to take over, and they wouldn’t be able to rule either way. What Jarreth is saying, and exactly how it involves her and the dragonfly on her shoulder, suddenly clicks into place in her mind.

“So you need someone that is part Fae and part human?”

Jarreth stares straight through her with a sad look on his face.

“Yes,” he says simply.

Chapter Nine

Power & Temptation

The feeling like you’ve just had everything ripped straight from your body, that’s the feeling that courses through Calandra. Her stomach clenches into a pretzel and her head swims in circles like a fish that’s just been taken from the ocean and thrown into a small aquarium. How had her life become this exactly? She ponders the happenings of the last few days, the events that have flipped her world over completely. Like a globe that has been knocked off of a shelf and sent into a whirlwind fall, just waiting for the moment it will hit the floor and shatter into a million pieces.

“The good news is you’ll get powers.” Jarreth places a hand on her knee, and she takes in the breath she’s been holding since he said the word yes.

“Wait, just give me a minute please,” she replies.

He has just sent her entire world spiraling around her and he wants to continue into his explanation like it was nothing. Apparently they expect the person destined to take over their world to have a stronger will or better control of their emotions than she does. She tries to wrap her brain around what he has told her. Surely this is all a crazy dream; she must still be caught up in one of her daydream experiences. Calandra wants more than anything to believe that this is all fake, that it’s yet another one of her crazy daydreams and she’ll soon find herself back in her car sitting on the side of the road while drivers speed past her. Yet something deep down inside of her won’t let her believe it is all imaginary. Somehow she knows that it’s real, call it gut instinct or whatever you like, she just knows.

Suddenly the world isn’t spinning anymore. Instead, it’s thrown off of its axis somehow. Nothing makes sense and a thick fog rolls into her head, clouding all of the thoughts going through it.

“Stop it!” she snaps at Jarreth.

Perplexed, Jarreth looks up at her. “What?”

“I want …” Calandra pauses, thinking carefully of how to choose her words before she continues. “I need to feel this.”

“So feel it. What happened, Calandra?”

So it’s something else entirely now? Great, more things to make everything a bit more complicated. Calandra rolls her eyes and scoffs out of frustration.

“I swear I didn’t do anything, Calandra. Please, tell me what happened,” Jarreth pleads.

“Clouds? Fog? Something … I don’t know exactly, but my thoughts aren’t there!” Calandra can’t seem to make a full sentence either apparently. She wonders if this is all stuff that she can blame on the mark that lies on her shoulder now, or maybe the air of the new world she’s in. She certainly doesn’t feel anything like herself here.

Jarreth looks surprised as he picks up his glass once more and studies her.

“What?” Calandra scoffs, she’s becoming more than a little irritated.

“I assume it must be a vision. If you’d stop fighting it that is.” Jarreth’s voice sounds exasperated.

Calandra sighs. “Can things get just a bit more complicated please? I mean, really … I’m in another world as it is. Shouldn’t I get a break from the drama? I thought that was how fantasy worked!”

Jarreth frowns over at her. “Unfortunately, yes they can, and not only that—” He breaks off and brushes his finger along the side of her face. There’s that cool burning sensation again. “They will,” he finishes and looks back to his cup immediately.

Calandra sighs, falls back into the couch dramatically, and closes her eyes. Who would have thought her life could change so quickly in one day. She was a normal teenage girl just the other day, wasn’t she? One that had an overbearing father, oddly colored streaked hair, and more than unique eyes; but other than that, she was normal enough. A simple teenage girl with a quarterback boyfriend that no one quite understood how she managed to get. She had normal high school drama, and she was an average height, slender girl with a slightly less than fashionable wardrobe.

Normalcy was something she has apparently been taking for granted all this time. Now she is being faced with an intimidating destiny and way too much new information. Her world is spinning out of control rapidly and she’s just waiting for the moment when she finally flies off of it into oblivion. Which might actually be a welcome option right about now. Calandra sits against the couch and tries to focus on her breathing, to steady herself and make some kind of sense of things. She feels it start to open up inside her, the black hole that threatens her sanity all too often for her liking. The anxiety takes over all her efforts to calm herself. Her breathing starts to pick up and her heart begins to race.

“That,” she says without opening her eyes, “you may freely take, and I don’t care what you do with it either.”

Instantaneously, the anxiety melts away and Calandra relaxes into the slight comfort she gains from its absence. Her mind is still covered in a dense gray fog. The icy hot feeling slowly slides up her arm, and is traced by a tingle that spreads throughout her entire body. She doesn’t have to open her eyes to know that Jarreth is touching her. The sensation gradually trails up her arm and across her shoulder, and stills there. The electricity slowly traces circles around where the new mark is on her shoulder. The current that his touch causes courses through her limbs and dissipates everything else. Her breathing slows, probably more than it should. The moments stretch out into something uncountable. A sense of belonging washes over Calandra.

Just as she finds herself feeling totally at ease and relaxing completely for the first time in a very long time, she hears water dripping and it causes an echo. It is a hollow sound that cannot be coming from inside of a house. The smell of dirt and copper fills her nose. A soft babble comes into focus. The gray fog slowly evaporates and a cavern appears in its place. The true beauty of nature lies in this most unlikely place. Stalactites and stalagmites make a maze of Mother Nature’s finest artwork. The small light that comes through the opening of the cavern makes reflections of pinks, lavenders, and light blues off the face of the water and parts of the rocks surrounding her. The entire scene is breathtaking.

“Calandra.” Tristan’s voice brings her out of her state of amazement.

Calandra spins on her feet and finds he is huddled in a corner. His face is dirty and his features are darkened from lack of sleep. There are tear tracks through the dirt on his face and his eyes are bloodshot.

“Wouldn’t you be a sight for sore eyes if you weren’t so different.” His voice is cold and cruel, which is not normal for him.

Calandra tries to place his newfound coldness. He must be mad that she brought him here. She can’t be that different, other than the dragonfly on her shoulder. She looks over and finds that it is indeed still there, proudly reminding her of her destiny that still lies ahead of her.

“Are you okay?” she asks as she walks over to him.

His arms are behind his back as if they are chained to the wall, but Calandra doesn’t see anything binding them. Bewildered, she goes to reach for them to try and pull them around and free him from his invisible captivity. Her hands tremble as they approach him, but just before she touches his filthy arm with her fingers, the entire scene disappears into gray fog once more.

Calandra sits up with a gasp. Her eyes open wide and ferociously. She is still in Jarreth’s house; he sits next to her and looks completely perplexed. His hand rests on her shoulder.

“What was it?” Jarreth asks.

“I saw Tristan. I saw where he’s keeping him,” she says out of breath.

Calandra remembers the calm and the feeling that went through her at his touch, and her nerves shoot up tenfold. “You did that, didn’t you? You made that happen? Was it even real at all?” She says it louder than she means to.

“No, Cal, you relaxed and you quit fighting the vision. Please tell me what you saw. There is so much you do not know of visions, you can’t understand what it means,” he pleads, placing his arms tentatively at his side.

“No!” She gets up off the couch with haste. “You are done explaining anything.”

Without another thought, Calandra bolts out the door. Her feet carry her faster than she ever remembers them being able to before. Her tears stream hot down her face and drip off her cheeks. She runs back the way she came, to the only place in this world she knows. Back to where she entered into this world and as far away from Jarreth and the dark cloud he’s just opened up on her world as she can possibly get.

****

The room is covered in dark paint. There is a small table next to the bed. One small lamp is the only source of light in the tiny room. The door is directly in front of him and there is a light coming in through the crack. Tristan sits on the bed, and the cool air drapes over him like a heavy cloak.

Drake walks into the room with the same cool smile Tristan saw as soon as Calandra disappeared from his sight. Then he was sent here, to this small room. He has no idea where he is.

“Still alive?” Drake chuckles.

Tristan nods slightly.

“Here.” Drake slides a tray with a sandwich and a water bottle onto the bed. “Eat up and enjoy,” he says before he disappears back out the door and leaves Tristan to the dark closet of a room once more.

Chapter Ten

Field of Innocence

The tree sits majestically at the edge of the field. It is the sister tree of the one in the almost identical field in the mortal world. Calandra still isn’t exactly sure what that means, but she certainly doesn’t remember the tree at home looking quite so … wise. This tree is tall and wide, showing that it’s seen a lot in its lifetime. There’s trial there; about halfway up, the tree starts to tilt a bit. It’s as if the weight of the world sat on it all of a sudden, and weighed it down from its true goal of growing straight up to the sun. Luckily, it won in the end. It still grew taller and taller, albeit tilted a bit. The beauty of the story in that one detail intrigues Calandra.

She walks over to the majestic tree and gently places her hand on the trunk. She can feel the pain radiating from it, the strength, and the will to continue on. This tree has prospered against all odds, even when it wasn’t meant to. It comforts Calandra to see the possibility of it. A calming sensation runs through her. It comes straight from the tree, into her hand, and courses throughout her entire body. Belonging, purpose, and reason wash through her and she relishes in it, she soaks it all in. A new sensation renews her as the wind picks up around her. Her hair flies into the air and lightly blows in the breeze.

This isn’t simply an emotion trying to communicate with her. This is destiny. The purpose of everything she’s ever been through and is going to go through all lead up to this perfect moment. Calandra can sense the reality of it as she stands here touching the tree. This is what she must face, the road she must take even if she doesn’t want to. The road less traveled on, she thinks. People always want to take the easy road, but not everyone has a choice. Some must take the long, rocky road and hope that it leads them somewhere beautiful at the end. This is Calandra’s mission, and nature is letting her know in this moment.

The wind disappears in an instant, and the rush of emotions leaves her skin at the exact same time. The earth is quiet again, calm. Calandra opens her eyes, though she hadn’t realized she had closed them. Jarreth stands a few feet from her and he looks at her with amazement. Heat rises to her cheeks. Dropping her hand from the tree, she sits on the ground and rests her back against the bark, not wanting to break contact with it just yet. Jarreth’s expression doesn’t falter; he simply stands there as he waits for permission to approach.

“Come,” she says and brushes the word off her hand at him. “You look kinda stalker-ish standing there, staring at me like that. It’s creepy.” Calandra means it to be sarcastic, but she sees a flash of pain cross his face as his eyes change to a dark cobalt blue for a moment.

Calandra feels like her head is in an aquarium. Too many thoughts will create a migraine pressure in your head. A fog settles in so that nothing is clear at all. How to figure out what’s right and what’s wrong is unfortunately something that has to be learned the hard way. No one can tell you, and even if they could, if you’re simply following the rules because it’s what you’re supposed to do, then you are missing the point.

Calandra has no idea who to trust, and her heart races at the thought that Jarreth may actually be an enemy. Somehow his eyes tell her something different. There’s something innocent about them, the opaqueness of them, the tranquility of the color of them, the softness deep within them. The way he can stare straight into you with them. Surely something so beautiful can’t be evil, at least not completely.

“Would you like to know why you feel drawn to this place?” Jarreth asks.

“Who said I felt drawn to it?” Calandra doesn’t mean for it to come out sounding as offensive as it does.

“You think it was simply coincidence that you came here when you needed a place to sort through things?”

“It’s the only place that I knew because this is where I came through, right?” she asks, feeling suddenly unsure of something she had been absolutely positive about just moments ago.

“It is where you came to enter our world,” Jarreth begins, “that, however, is not the reason your body led you here. This, Calandra, is the Field of Innocence.”

“No, the place in my … whatever, was the Field of Innocence,” Calandra corrects him as she remembers him saying the same line in the experience that started this whole ordeal.

“Yes and no,” Jarreth replies simply.

“Your riddles really get old and irritating! Is that like a Faerie thing or just a Jarreth thing?” Calandra scoffs.

“It’s like a make you think and figure things out for yourself thing.” Jarreth nudges her in the shoulder and flashes the most genuine smile Calandra has ever seen.

“Well, I’ve kind of had a long day, so how about you just give me this one?” Calandra hides her blush as best she can.

Jarreth laughs. “You are correct. Where we were in the mortal world is the Field of Innocence as well. They aren’t exactly one in the same although they are connected. The one you are in currently has the full magic of Fae in it. Which is what you were experiencing when I got here.”

Calandra goes back in her head to when she first encountered Jarreth and where she first learned of her faerie heritage.
You’re back to the innocence of a child, ridden of all the untruths your people have made up over the years, and free to see what really is.
“The innocence of a child,” Calandra mumbles without meaning to say anything.

“Yes, Cal, the innocence of a child. The ability to know the truth, to believe what is real not because of probability or logic, but because you just know,” Jarreth explains.

“So, like faith?” Calandra asks.

“I guess you could say that. However, faith isn’t exactly something that is believed very widely here in Faerie.”

Calandra stares blankly at Jarreth with the question written plain as day on her face.

“We tend to think that hope and faith are things humans invented to feel better about themselves. Kind of a way to make bad situations seem better because they think that something larger—more powerful and more capable—is in control and can make everything better. The way I see it, the only one who can control anything about your life is you. You’re in control of what you become and what you do. The only thing that can make anything any better are your choices and how you decide to handle the situations that you are dealt.”

Calandra takes a deep breath and looks down at the dragonfly on her shoulder with a slight frown.

“What is it?” Jarreth asks.

“I kinda thought this was a symbol of hope,” she says without taking her eyes off of the mark.

“Not hope, Cal, support. That is the mark of destiny, and it is a reminder that you have people behind you to help you achieve it. The field is also a reminder, Calandra, a place you can come and know again what is right and wrong. A place to clear your thoughts and figure things out when nothing out there,” Jarreth points away from the field as he speaks, “makes any sense and you can’t tell what’s up or down anymore. And trust me, if today wasn’t enough of a sign, that is going to happen.”

Calandra stares at him as she tries to take it all in; the way things have changed in just a few short days. Something should fill her—doubts, fear, nerves—but as she sits here and stares at Jarreth she feels none of those things. His eyes somehow manage to take it all away and bring her back to a state of serenity. The world, crazy as it is at the moment, disappears and feels just right.

“So, I take it if you don’t believe in faith and hope, there’s not exactly any kind of a deity here either?” Calandra doesn’t quite understand why that is the first thought that crosses her mind at the moment, but it is out of her mouth before she can stop it.

Jarreth chuckles. “No, dear, faeries tend to believe in nothing but power. Magic and temptation is our controller. Trust me, if there were some kind of a deity out there, I highly doubt they would take kindly to our kind anyway. We aren’t exactly the most redeemable creatures, so to speak.”

“I don’t believe that.” Calandra’s hand rests on the soft grass slightly out to her side and she leans into it to support herself. She absorbs every word he says like a sponge, lingers on his every statement. She links them all together and tries to build a picture of what this world is like. The small piece that she has seen was a little more than troublesome in her state of mind at the time. Not to mention that she was only slightly intimidated by the fact that every single person was staring at her, or technically at her mark.

“What exactly don’t you believe?”

“That you aren’t redeemable. Everyone is supposed to be, right? I mean, if God made the world and everything in it, then surely he’d provide a way for everything to be redeemed, right?” Calandra isn’t exactly the right person to be discussing the technicalities of something such as religion as she is filled with a million questions of her own regarding it. “So …” She begins a game of twenty questions in an effort to change the subject since she feels incapable of discussing the subject at hand, despite being the one that got them on the subject in the first place. “I take it from the stares I got on the way to your house everyone here knows what this means.” Calandra noses her face toward the dragonfly to indicate what she is referring to. It feels like a childish move to make, but she isn’t sure what word to use to refer to it exactly.

“Your mark?” Jarreth seems to know all of her questions before she voices them. “There is only one thing it could mean, Cal, and yes, that is why everyone was staring. There will be quite a stir over the next while about you.” His smile beams into her and leaves her feeling suddenly exposed.

“Oh,” she replies simply.

“That wasn’t meant as an insult you know.” Jarreth places his hand over hers. Heat spreads throughout her body and is followed by a cold tingling sensation. It relaxes her and eases up the tension that has been building in her head all day. She relishes in the feeling and lets it wash over her. “Calandra, there is a bit more that you must understand about what lies ahead for you here.” His eyes flash a soft shade of midnight blue before they return to their normal shade of baby blue.

Calandra tries to ready herself for whatever is to come. “Do I want to hear or understand it?” she asks. “I am in a bit of an overload as it is.”

“I know my dear, but you must hear it and truly understand it as so many rely on you now.” He leans his hand into hers and sends the surge of electricity and fire and ice back through her once more. His eyes look sad and Calandra’s nerves build inside her like a brick wall despite the sensation that pools in her skin from Jarreth’s touch.

Calandra takes in a cleansing breath and closes her eyes momentarily. “Fine, go for it,” she sighs.

“Faeries are born out of imagination. People dreamt us up long ago. That’s one of the reasons there are so many different types. Now there are many more types due to all of the mixing of blood that’s been done over the years. But that’s where evil comes from as well, it is created.” Lifting his hand from hers, Jarreth places it on her shoulder and rests it on her mark. “The mind is a much more powerful thing than humans could ever comprehend. Much too powerful for anyone to be trusted with. And it’s even worse when they don’t know the capabilities of it. Nevertheless, you, Calandra, must not only understand that but learn to control it as well. The power of your mind combined with the limited Fae powers and emotions you were given could make or break the entire universe. You have the power to destroy both of our worlds without even meaning to.” He stares into her eyes once more as he finishes his explanation.

The weight of the world, of two worlds, rests on her shoulders. She painfully pulls her gaze from Jarreth’s and focuses on the tree. She wonders to herself what it was that made the tree bend and tilt the way that it does. What burden was placed on it? More importantly, how did it manage to hold the weight enough to still grow tall and strong, albeit just a little crooked? She wonders where that strength comes from and how she can get some of it for herself. The breeze picks up again and wraps around her body; it caresses her skin with a soft, gentle whisper. Her hair picks up and dances in the wind, her skin tingles with a knowing sensation. Jarreth stares at her with the same sense of amazement as he did when he first saw her in the field earlier.

At that moment, she comes to the conclusion that whatever it is she must face, she can somehow manage it. No one knows their future or how to handle the situations that they are faced with, why should she be any different? Just because she now knows she has a big destiny in front of her? She is still the only one in control of how she deals with her life. The breeze leaves as quickly as it came and a chill rushes over her in its absence.