Fierce Dawn (28 page)

Monica and Holly’s skills boggled the mind. At some point, Holly’d shoved a few items into Sadie’s lap and instructed her to hold each, close her eyes and let them speak. Speak? As
if that’s
all it took. She tried, she really did. But the sock said foot. Foot led to ankle and soon she was daydreaming about Elijah kissing hers. Had she dreamed the whole thing?

The blank paged book reminded her she should be journaling and that her appointment with Dr. Meyers was tomorrow! Double crap. Heather would freak if she didn’t make the appointment. How many new calls and texts had blown up her cell phone in the last thirteen hours? But would Elijah deem it safe for her to go?

“
Sadie?”

“
Huh?” She glanced up. Holly looked expectant. Monica looked amused.

“
Are you getting anything?”

Sadie lifted the sterling silver crucifix in her palm and gave a half
-
hearted nod. “A little.”

Holly’s eyebrows quirked. She turned back to Monica. “Keep trying.”

Was she paranoid or did Holly less than like her? Sure
,
Holly was more than helpful, especially whenever Elijah was around, but friendly? Not exactly.

Elijah thought Sadie had changed. But she had no more psychic awareness than before. Unless sex dreams of him counted, but those weren’t new. After last night she had more to lose than ever. She’d drunk from the fountain and still thirsted.

Monica snapped her fingers in Sadie’s face. Sadie’s scalp tightened, heat flashed over her. “What is it?” Sadie said.

“
It isn’t working, is it?” Monica gestured to the crucifix in Sadie’s palm and sat next to her with a loud huff.

“
Where’s Holly?”

“
Getting more water.” She shook the bottle in her hands for emphasis. “So? Am I right?”

“
Nothing. Not a speck.” Sadie sighed. “How do you do it?”

“
I don’t know. I sort of want it to happen and then it does.” Monica leaned back. “What do you think is really going on with all this?”

Sadie grimaced. “What do you mean?”

“
I mean between vampire dude, miss sparky and angel guy, why do they need us?” She drank and Sadie waited. “Let’s be honest, transformed or not, we aren’t like them. Holly doesn’t merely control fire, she can make your blood boil. Then there’s Lyric. He can make you believe whatever he wants. If you don’t know he’s feeding you images, how can you know what’s real? I don’t know about you
,
but I don’t trust any of them yet. Besides, we have no real reason to care about their cause, do we?”

Why would Monica stay if she didn’t trust Elijah? Or care?

“
I don’t know,” Sadie said at last. It was true. She still wasn’t clear on what would happen next. Especially now. Sadie couldn’t seem to tap into messenger powers. Although, Holly hadn’t exactly devoted much time with her so far. She was a part of something now. Beyond the transformation. She’d begun to think all the events in her life as leading her here. “I suspect it might be one of those good for all mankind things that we’ll want to be a part of.”

Monica snorted. “Yeah. Okay. I’m here because I was caught following you, mimicking a werewolf. Actually, because freakos were following me following you. If not for that, they don’t need me.”

Sadie stared back, speechless. Did this creature have any idea how unique she was, how much good she could do? “Why follow me?”

“
I knew you were like me. A changeling.”

“
And that whole chasing me in the dark?”

“
Yeah. Sorry ‘bout that.” She drank again. “Don’t get
me
wrong. I’m not leaving here or anything. But as far as I can tell, Elijah’s the only one I trust,” Monica said.

Possessiveness breathed into Sadie’s heart. But what was she supposed to say? Screw you, he’s mine? Monica snapped her fingers and another bottled water appeared in her hands. “How’d you do that?” Sadie took
the
bottle. Condensation dripped onto her hand.

Monica gave her a wry smile. “Like I said. I wanted it.”

“
So you just think ‘bottled water’ and one appears?” Sadie could do nothing but seduce Elijah so far. She couldn’t even shock him anymore.

“
I know, right? And Holly’s off fetching some.” Monica laughed. “I thought of how I didn’t want to walk to the kitchen and wished it could appear when I snap my fingers.”

“
Wow.” Envy whispered through her. “Why didn’t you show Holly?”

Her high-glossed lips catching the light, Monica gave Sadie a look that said, duh.

“
What else can you do?” Sadie asked, wondering if purple lip gloss would make her look like art, too.

Monica stood up. “I don’t know, but I figure if I try whatever my imagination can come up with, I might find more.” She reached a hand out. “I think you’ll be able to do something if you try it that way, too. You have to realize, there’s nothing to be scared of. If you fail, so what?”

Sadie took Monica’s hand and stood as well.

“
I really am sorry, too,” Monica said, looking away.

Sadie’s stomach lurched the tiniest bit. “What for?”

“
For scaring you that night. Elijah stopped me. But I promise, I didn’t mean you any real harm.” She tossed her empty bottle to where they’d been sitting. “I have a twisted sense of humor. Maybe I was a little mad that you hadn’t transformed yet. Sucks being like this all by yourself.”

“
I think I’m falling for him,” Sadie confessed, not sure why. Maybe because she kne
w h
ow monumentally stupid it was to fall for a man who thought their attraction would soon end. Maybe Monica who would say as much and snap Sadie out of it.

Monica glanced away and nodded. “Yeah. I kind of thought so. I guess it’s a good thing I’m here then.”

Before Sadie could ask what she meant, Holly returned. More than ever, she wished Elijah would come back. So much for snapping out of it.

The wish seemed to keep him away. That night, exhausted from sparring, she slept alone in his bed and woke alone there, too. Monica found her for breakfast and Holly resumed her so
-
called training. Sadie didn’t see how handing her another three random objects counted as much help
,
though. The hour of her appointment with Dr. Meyers overshadowed every thought. She needed to call Heather, make some excuse. She needed to reschedule the appointment. Yet she sat watching Holly and Monica instead, pretending to concentrate on the shirt in her hands.

Maybe Elijah wouldn’t be back today at all.

During a break, she went to Elijah’s room and checked her phone for voicemail. Nothing. Only a text from Jen. “Hope you are having tons of fun. Don’t worry, the warden hasn’t called.”

Her battery was low. Three o’clock loomed less than two hours away. Sadie ran her thumb over the buttons. She couldn’t go home. Elijah had made that risk clear enough. But she couldn’t cancel the appointment. Not without stirring major sister panic.

A knock sounded on the door. It was Holly. “Ready?”

Sadie pocketed the phone. “I need to ask you a favor.”

Holly crossed her arms. “Alright. What?”

“
If I’m going to be able to remain here, I have to keep up appearances. I need to go to an appointment with my sister today. It’ll take an hour or so.”

Holly’s lips curled. “Are you asking my permission?”

No. She needed a ride. “Actually, do you think Elijah will be back before three?”

Holly tensed. “I wouldn’t know. Lyric hasn’t imaged anything and neither
has
called. They could be halfway across the world, could have crossed back. I don’t know.”

Sadie nodded. “Can you give me a ride somewhere
,
then?” When Holly tensed more, she added, “If it wasn’t important, if I could reschedule, I wouldn’t ask.”

Holly’s eyes narrowed slightly. “What’s it for?”

Should she lie? “My sister and I are meeting with my doctor. If I don’t go….”

“
Well, we don’t need any more complications, now do we?”

Sadie shook her head. And waited, watching for the woman’s glow-tipped hair to reveal some sign of anger.

“
Astrid is gone. I don’t think it’s a good idea for me to leave Monica. Doubt you want to drag her along.” The flames flickered a tiny bit and glowed orange. “Know how to drive a stick?”

Only once, in a jam. “Yes.”

Holly shrugged and smiled wide. “Perfect. You can take my car.”

Recalling Lyric’s version of a motorcycle, Sadie opened her mouth to protest.

“
Don’t worry. It hasn’t been modified, just supped up.”

Sadie arrived with ten minutes to spare and only ground the Porsche’s gears seven times. God, it felt good to be out of that house, out of contained quarters. The air tasted dusty but fresh in her mouth, and her body seemed more alive than ever. The greens of the leaves, the blue of the endless sky, everything had a new vibrancy, as though she saw life in the world that she couldn’t before. As though she’d been color blind before.

Part of Sadie worried the difference in her would be obvious to everyone else, too. Thankfully, the receptionist greeted her as dully as always. And no one had gawked at her on the way in. Her confidence in pulling this off climbed.

“
You can go in,” the receptionist said.

Sadie strode to the double doors. One sat ajar, she realized. Was Heather already in with Dr. Meyers? The hairs on her neck prickled. Inside, Heather waited on the sofa, Dr. Meyers next to her. They saw her and stood.

“
Sadie,” each said, Heather suspiciously sweetly.

“
What’s going on?” Sadie asked.

“
We were talking a moment,” Dr. Meyers said, motioning her forward. “Please, join us.”

Heather went to the door and closed it. Sadie eyed her usual sofa spot, the spot they’d been in. She took the chair instead. Dr. Meyers retrieved a pad of paper from her desk and took her usual chair. Once Heather sat and several agonizing minutes ticked by, Sadie’s pulse slowed to a trot. She had to remember, they didn’t know anything. They were worried for her. As usual.

“
You didn’t bring a painting with you,” Dr. Meyers said.

Sadie’s mouth fell open. “Uh, no, I meant to but I completely forgot. Sorry.”

“
Well, I suppose that makes Heather’s surprise a good one for both of us then.”

“
What surprise?” Her neck hairs stood higher.

Dr. Meyers nodded toward Heather. Sadie almost gagged on her own rabid heartbeat.

“
Don’t be upset, Sadie,” Heather said in a rush. “I came by yesterday while you were at work.” Heather reached between the sofa and wall. “Jen wasn’t home and I found them. I was looking for you and, well, I…I never realized how talented you are.”

Heather propped up her painting of Elijah. His blue wings were spread in flight, his naked torso gleamed back at her. Sadie wanted to grab the large canvas and flee. She wanted to cover it, hide it from their prying eyes. How could Heather do this? Of all her paintings, this was the last she would ever show Dr. Meyers. Or anyone else.

“
Who is he?” Dr. Meyers quietly asked.

“
Nobody,” Sadie choked out. “It isn’t finished yet.” His wings were different, his skin, his muscle tone.

“
Isn’t this Elijah?” Heather asked. “Your boyfriend?”

How did she kn—oh, yeah, Heather had met Elijah. She’d forgotten. Sadie slowly nodded, waiting for Dr. Meyers to attack, for the room to crash down around them. More silence.

“
I found one of your journals, too,” Heather said and a single tear streamed down her cheek.

Why was she crying? Sadie was the one who should be hurt here. And she was. But damn it, Heather’s clogged voice and watery eyes were making her feel guilty for feeling betrayed. Did Heather bring in the journal for Dr. Meyers, too? Had they read it? Did they know her secrets? The meds?

“
Perhaps this is a good time to discuss boundaries,” Dr. Meyers interjected.

Sadie snorted. “Boundaries? How I don’t have any? How because of a diagnosis, I don’t get to have any? None that anyone respects, anyways.”

“
That’s not fair,” Heather said. “I didn’t intentionally find your paintings and I meant well when I read your journal.” She wiped her cheeks and took a deep breath. “Elijah means a lot more to you than you let on.”

Sadie refused to discuss this. Elijah was none of Heather’s business. And reading her journal, well intended or not, was inexcusable. She wished she could get up and leave.

“
Heather indicated you were recently sick with the flu, Sadie,” Dr. Meyers said. “She is concerned that you might have stopped taking your medications. Dr. Fox indicated he hasn’t had contact from you.”

Sadie knew where this was going. “I started taking them again as usual. I meant to call
,
but I guess I was too scared.” Amazingly, the lies fell easily from her lips. “I don’t want my dosages to go back up. They make me foggy.”

“
Understandably,” Dr. Meyers said. “But your health must come first, wouldn’t you agree?”