Fighting to Survive (Guarded Hearts Book 3) (3 page)

Shawn: Do you want to meet for lunch tomorrow? My classes are done at 1.

Me: Ok, do you want to meet at the fountain?

Shawn: Sure, I’ll see you then, Princess.

Princess?
Holly and the girls usually call me Princess as a joke. I’m really not sure how I feel about Shawn calling me that. It’s the girls’ way of making fun of me for having money growing up. To anyone on the outside I probably look like the picture of a trust fund baby. My mom and dad definitely have a lot of money, and I
do
have a trust fund, but I try not to live like it. I haven’t ever touched my trust fund, and even though my dad deposits an obnoxious amount of money into my bank account on a regular basis, I don’t use most of it.

Growing up in my house was easy financially, but that was about the only easy part. My parents constantly fought with each other, and it only stopped when they both started seeing other people on the side. They kept up appearances at the country club my dad belonged to because public image was everything to my mother. I was told on a daily basis how my most important job was to find a suitable husband who came from a “good” family. The fact that I actually want to get an education and work for a living drives my mother insane.

I dread having to go home for break because I know that’s all she is going to talk about.
‘Why are you wasting your time at school, Cece?’ ‘Why don’t you come to the club more, Cece?’ ‘Cece, Scott Jameson is a perfect match for you.’
My mother insists on calling me Cece and pushing me on Scott, who in my opinion, is slimier than a slug. Every time my parents force me to go to the club with them, we just ‘happen’ to run into him.

I decide to go to bed hoping that it will give me some break from my own thoughts. The entire time I’m trying to fall asleep, all I can think of is Shawn and what might happen tomorrow.

“So, you’re really going to try to start something with her? You know if you screw it up Holly is going to beat your ass, Christen is like her sister.”

“Thanks for the pep talk, J, you really know how to build a brother up.” I came to Jason for advice on how to handle this whole relationship thing. The reason I came to him is because he’s the last person I could ever see making one work, yet somehow he did. I think the main reason for that is Nicole. She always calls him on his shit and doesn’t let him get away with half of what he’s used to doing.

“Listen, I’m just telling you to be careful. I know the pressure because Mads gave me the threatening talk when I started dating Nic.” We all thought he would screw it up, which would have been bad for everyone involved. He and Nicole still aren’t home free. All of the drama of having his mom be such a presence is not easy on them. Jason hasn’t been back to Nicole’s house, and neither has she, since the night they figured out who her stepmother is.

As we’re walking up to the fountain where I’m meeting Christen, we see Nicole in a heated “discussion” with Stacey. We both look at each other, knowing there’s no way this will end well. Stacey has tried to break up Nicole and Jason multiple times, so saying that they have issues is an understatement.

“Hey, guys, what’s going on?” Mads walks up and when she sees what we’re watching she just sighs. “What the hell is she doing? She’s just as bad as Alyssa! I don’t understand what it is about girls at this school not getting the message when a guy is taken.” Before I can even reply, Nicole lunges at Stacey and they start to roll around on the ground. We’re all speechless for a few seconds before Mads speaks up. “J, why are you still standing here? Go do something!”

Jason just laughs. “I’m about to take out my phone and record this. Nicole looks damn hot.” Before he can say anything else, Mads punches him in the chest

“Jason Smith, stop being a douchebag and go help her!”

“Okay, okay. If you ask me
,
Nicole doesn’t look like the one in need of help.” They both jog over to where the girls are still fighting. Right now, Nicole is sitting on top of Stacey and pulling out what I can only hope isn’t her real hair.

I don’t even notice Christen standing next to me until she starts talking. “Oh my God! What the heck is going on?” I turn to answer her but lose my words once I see her. She’s standing there, staring at the scene which is still unfolding, and it amazes me that I never realized how beautiful she is until now. Her long blonde hair is down and curled, and she’s wearing a light pink dress. It hugs all of her curves in every way, and I suddenly feel the need to cover her up with the sweatshirt I have in my bag.

She waves her hand in front of my face, and I realize I’ve just been standing here staring at her. “Um, I have no idea. J and I walked up just as they started going at it.

“Should we go over there?”

The last thing I want to do was to go hang out with everyone right now. Especially knowing Nic is probably going to be in a bad mood. The girl is hell on wheels when she’s not happy. “No, Mads will help J with her. Let’s go grab lunch.”

We start walking toward the dining hall together and I find myself reaching out for her hand. I can’t believe how nervous I am right now. I’ve known Christen for a couple of months, but I’ve been so distracted with trying to keep my secret I never really noticed her. When we arrive at the dining hall we get our food and sit down.

The awkward silence sets in and I have no idea what to say. Jason is always the flirt and Carter is always the nice guy who can talk to any girl. I’m usually just the quiet one who occasionally laughs at their jokes and blends into the background. From what I know about Christen, the girls always tease her about being spoiled and Carter told me her dad is some big business man.

“So, aside from school and the fights, what else do you like to do?”

“Um, not really anything special. I played football in high school, but with my classes right now, I really don’t have much time to do anything else. The pre-med classes really require a lot of work and then I have to fight just to be able to pay for them.”

“I remember you saying that the other night. Can’t you get financial aid?”

“I do get aid, but it isn’t enough, and my family really can’t help me pay for school. I’ve tried to get loans, but I would need a cosigner and my parents’ credit score isn’t high enough.” Admitting this definitely isn’t easy. I hate that I’m in this situation and I hate lying to my family even more.

“So—”

My phone starts to ring, and when I look down, I see that it’s Paul. He runs the fights and usually only calls once he has a time and a place. “Hello?”

“Hey, come to the warehouse tonight at 8.”

Before I can even respond he hangs up. I look back up at Christen. “Sorry, that was, um…” This is the point where I would usually make up a lie, and then come up with an excuse to leave. I don’t want to do it anymore. I want to be able to be honest with her and everyone else. “That was the guy who runs the fights.  He was letting me know that there’s one tonight.”

She seems as if she doesn’t know how to react. “Oh, are you going to go? Do you think I could come with you?”

I choke on the soda I’m drinking. “What?”

Before she can respond, Jason, Nicole, Maddy, Carter, and Holly all walk up together and sit down. Jason smirks at me. “So, how is the first date, love birds?”

“Better until you showed up, jackass.” Everyone laughs, but I’m serious. I can’t believe they are actually crashing our first date.

“Whatever, dude, you know you still love me.” He takes a bite of his burger that’s so big I honestly don’t know how he’s able to close his mouth. “You gonna be around tonight?”

I catch myself about to lie and say I have a study group, but decide to go with the truth. “No, I just got a call for a fight.”

Everyone turns toward me and stares before Nicole breaks the silence. “Cool, I’m there.”

“Excuse me, Nic? You are
not
going.” Jason continues to eat his burger and I can basically see the steam coming out of Nicole’s ears.
Here we go.

“What do you mean I’m not going?! I didn’t ask for, and I definitely don’t need, your permission! I will do what I want when I want.”

I can see J getting more aggravated. “Listen, just ‘cause you beat the crap out of Stacey doesn’t mean you can start going to the fights. You are not going, Nic, and that’s the end of it.” She starts to respond but J shoots her a look which would have made me shut up if it had been aimed at me. It’s clear he won this argument, but he will probably be paying for it later tonight.

“Before you even say anything, Maddy, you’re not going, either,” Carter says without even looking up from his plate.

She holds her hands up in surrender. “Hey, I wasn’t even going to try. Good luck, though, Shawn.”

“Thanks, Mads.”

“Well, since I don’t have to answer to either of you cavemen, maybe I’ll go.” Carter and Jason’s heads both swing in Holly’s direction.

“Like hell you are,” Carter says. He’s always been really protective over Holly—we all have.

“You are not my father, Carter, and you can’t—”

“I may not be your father, Holly, but there is no way in hell you are going there, even if I have to tie your ass to a chair.”

Holly starts laughing and we all look at her like she’s losing her mind. “Chill out! I wasn’t really going to go, I just wanted to see you freak out. If I did want to, though, I would.” She stands up from the table. “However, I have a date tonight.”

I think Carter’s mouth drops open so much it almost hits the floor. “With who?”

“None of your business.”

“It definitely is my business, Holly. Who is he and how do you know him?”

“Jesus, Carter, you really need to calm down. His name is Josh and I met him online.”

That’s it. Carter’s face is so red I think he’s actually going to burst a blood vessel, or have a heart attack. “Online? So you don’t even know him? Are you stupid? Don’t you know what could happen?”

“Ugh! God! I’m not meeting him anywhere. It’s an online date—we are just signing on at the same time to talk.” Carter and J both look at each other and start laughing hysterically. “What is so funny?”

“Hol, you know his name probably isn’t even Josh, right?” Jason barely chokes out the sentence in between laughing. “His name is probably Marvin, and he is a forty year old man with a beard and a beer belly.” With that, everyone at the table starts laughing with them, and Holly starts to walk away. “Come on, I’m sure it’s a really nice beer belly!”

She flips us all the middle finger as she reaches the door and leaves. Everyone else slowly makes their way out, leaving just Christen and me. “Well, that was interesting.” She smiles at me and then I remember her mentioning she wants to go tonight. “Listen, can I ask why you want to go tonight?”

“I want to go and support you. I know it isn’t something you’re proud of, but if it’s something you’re going to do then you should let us be there for you.”

“Can I ask you something? And let me know if it’s out of line.” She shakes her head yes. “We barely know each other, except for sharing mutual friends, and you could probably have any guy you want on campus. Why would you want to start something with me? I mean, don’t get me wrong, I’m definitely interested in you. However, I really don’t have much to offer you.”

She looks really annoyed and I instantly regret what I said. “I’m guessing this is because the boys told you my family has money?” She stands up from the table. “You know, coming from money doesn’t define a person or dictate what they want. I didn’t think, considering the situation you’re in, that you would be so judgmental and so quick to place stereotypes on people.”

She starts to walk away and I instantly feel like an asshole. I didn’t mean to offend her, I just don’t understand why she’s interested in me. I really have nothing to offer her. I get up, follow her out of the building, and catch up to her just as she’s reaching her car. “Christen, wait.”

She turns around and stands there, waiting for me to say something.
What should I say?
I feel like an idiot just standing here, but I really can’t come up with even one intelligent thought. After a minute, she opens her car door, gets in, and drives away.

I’m such an idiot.

I slam the front door and walk into the living room only to find Nicole sitting on the couch with a pint of ice cream. “You look like you need to join me.”

“I do, I’ll be right down.” I go upstairs to get changed, grabbed some ice cream, and sat down on the couch. Nicole looked over at me as if to ask me what was wrong. “You first.”

“Nothing, just Jason being damn unreasonable as always.” I raise my eyebrows at her. “What? This one was so not my fault! All I said to him was that maybe he should come home with me this weekend and try to work shit out with his mom. Then he got all pissed at me because I was even going home at all. I mean, what does he expect me to do, go on strike till my dad dumps the wicked witch?”

I don’t envy their situation at all. “Nic, you have to understand this is something that he isn’t ready to deal with.”