Fighting to Survive (Guarded Hearts Book 3) (6 page)

“No, they didn’t. I just found one of their walkie talkie things from work behind the couch and it’s on!”

Seriously? Are we in grade school?
I can’t believe that they would actually spy on us.

“I’m calling Carter right now.” Madison goes to get her phone but Nicole stops her.

“No, Mads, wait. I wanna have a little fun.”
Oh no. This cannot be good.
“Just follow my lead.” Nicole grabs the walkie, puts it in the middle of the floor, sits down, and motions for us all to join her. “Ugh! I am so over Jason ordering me around. Mads, you are so lucky that Carter isn’t as much of an ass. By the way, how are things going?” She winks at Madison, I’m guessing to let her know to play along.

“Ehhh, they’re okay. He is so hot, but sometimes I want him to be a little more manly. I mean, crying at movies? Sometimes I just want to give him a good punch and tell him to man up!”

She instantly puts her hand over her mouth to stifle the laughter and Holly seems to be having trouble keeping quiet, too. “You know, there are some really cute guys I know. If you girls ever get tired of them and want some new meat, just let me know.”

Now we’re all cracking up, Nicole even has a pillow over her mouth to hide the laughter. “What about you, Chris? How is Rocky?”

I want no part in this little game at all. “Everything is going good. We had a really great time last night.”

Holly punches me in my arm and whispers in my ear how much of a chicken I am. I don’t care, though, I do not want to be on the receiving end of the backlash.

“Girls, listen, I need some advice.” Nicole gets closer to the walkie. “There is this guy in my English class and he is so damn hot. He asked me out the other day, and I obviously told him I had a boyfriend, but it made me think. Jason and I used to be so hot and now things are just so-so. I mean, I don’t know what it is, but he just isn’t as good as he used to be.”

The next thing I know, the front door flies open and Jason and Carter are standing in the living room looking more pissed than I have ever seen them.

Holly stands up. “I’m gonna go up to my room.”

Shawn is standing behind the guys and is the first one to notice the walkie talkie on the floor. He starts to laugh and then walks over to the couch and sits down. I decide to get out of dodge and join him.

Carter is the first one to speak. “Really, Mads? I cry too much?”

She giggles and walks over to him. “We were just having fun. Come on, let’s go home.” She and Carter walk out the door.

Jason still hasn’t moved and Nicole is staring him down. “I can’t believe you spied on us, you—”

He storms over to her and picks her up. “Not as good as I used to be, huh? We’ll see about that.” He makes his way upstairs with Nicole. The entire time she has the biggest smile on her face.

Shawn and I are the only ones left. “If you want to come back to my place and escape the show that they are going to put on, you can.”

“That sounds good.”

We walk out to his car, and the entire time all I can think about is what’s going to happen when we get to his apartment. I know I’m probably putting too much thought into this, but I really don’t want him to think I’m easy.

When we get to the apartment, I walk right into his room. I lie down on the bed, not realizing how tired I am until now. Shawn laughs when he walks in and sees me. “Finally crashing?”

“Yeah, I just realized though I forgot to grab a change of clothes before we left.”

He walks over to his dresser, puts down a glass of ice water he grabbed when we came in, opens some drawers, and then turns back toward me with clothes in his hand. “They will probably be huge on you but, if you want to you can wear them.”

He hands me a shirt and a pair of pajama pants. “Thanks.” I go into the bathroom and put the clothes down on the sink. I reach around my back, trying to unzip my dress, but I can’t get it. It’s so tight there’s no way for me to get it off without unzipping it.

I walk back into Shawn’s room and he’s standing there with no shirt on. “Hey, I thought you wanted to change.”

It takes me a second to remember how to speak. I’m drawn to him like a magnet and my willpower is barely there anymore. “I, um…I couldn’t get my zipper. Could you help me?”

“Sure, come here.” I walk over and stand in front of him. When I look into his eyes I see passion and fire. I want him and I can tell he feels the same. I place my hands on his chest. His skin is so warm, and I love the feel of his muscles moving as I skim across his chest. I move my hands up and lace them through his hair, making eye contact with him once again. I can see the question in his eyes and I’m ready to answer it. I pull his head down and our lips connect.

It’s like a firecracker exploded and we become so frenzied with need for each other. He runs his hands all over my body, tracing every curve, and giving me goose bumps. He pulls back, “Are you sure about this? Because if you aren’t, we need to stop now.”

“I want you
.
I’ve been fighting my desire because of some notion concerning the amount of time to wait, but now I realize it’s how we feel not how long we’ve felt it.
”
I slam my mouth back against his, causing him to let out a sound that can best be described as a growl.

He pulls his mouth away from mine and turns me around so my back is now to him. His hands move around to my hips and he pulls me against him. I can feel him through the thin fabric of my dress, and the anticipation of what is about to happen makes me squirm. He sweeps my hair completely to one side, then lowers his mouth to my shoulder. Kissing and nipping along the way, he finally reaches my back.

His hands slowly make their way up my side and over to my zipper, pulling it down so slowly it’s like pure torture. Moving away from me for a minute, he’s back before I can turn around to see what he’s done. He places his lips just below my hairline, but this time when he kisses me there is an overwhelming cold sensation. I look back over at the dresser and realize he must have put an ice cube in his mouth.

He slowly kisses me all over my back and neck, every once in a while opening his mouth and dragging the ice across my skin. His hands find the sides of my dress, gently pushing it down until it falls around my feet. It isn’t the type of dress I could wear a bra with, so I’m now standing in only my lace boy shorts. He turns me back around to face him, smiling at the expression of lust I must have on my face.

He moves his hands down to my thighs, lifting me up, and I instinctively wrap my legs around him. Walking forward until his legs meet the end of the bed, he slowly lowers me down onto it. Slowly lowering himself down onto me, he kisses my chest and rubs little circles onto my hips with his thumbs. My fingers find his waistband and I push his basketball shorts down. He moves down lower, continuing to kiss me until he comes to my bellybutton.

His hands trace the waistband of my underwear, teasing me with his touch and making me need the contact. He lowers his head and kisses me through the lace, scraping the stubble on his chin against me as he does. I arch my back, trying to bring him closer to me. His hands slide my underwear down my legs, leaving me completely vulnerable to him.

Shawn stands and moves over to his dresser and I hear the sound of plastic ripping. He must be grabbing a condom.
Is it wrong that I’m disappointed by this?
I’ve always used them, but I hate them. Right now all I can think about is being able to feel him with no barriers between us. I sit up on my elbows. “What would you say to not using one of those? I’ve been on the pill for years and I really hate them.”

I can’t gauge his reaction at first. After a minute Shawn smiles at me, tosses what I can only guess is the condom at the trash, and then comes back over to me. “You sure this is what you want?”

I nod my head, because I am so full of anticipation and need that it’s almost impossible to form words.

He moves so we are now face to face again, and then kisses my lips more gently than before. “Happy Birthday, beautiful.”

Shawn pushes into me, instantly filling me with all of him and making me gasp from the intensity of it. He lowers his mouth to my breasts and begins to kiss them as he starts to move in and out of me. I lace my fingers through his hair, giving him the occasional tug when he uses his teeth.

Then he sits up on his knees so he has more control. His pace speeds up and it feels amazing. His hands move down my body until he finds my clit. When his fingers start to move, I can no longer control all the sounds that are coming out of my mouth. I’ve had sex a few times before, but it was never anything like this. I’m already so close to my release and we’ve just started.

Shawn pulls out of me, and before I know what’s happening, he flips me onto my stomach. I lift myself up and he pulls me so I’m now pressed up against him. Kissing my neck, he makes sure to hit the spot behind my ear that I love. When he pulls away, his hand rests on my upper back and pushes me down toward the bed. Slowly easing back into me, he moves his hands so they’re gripping my hips.

This time, when he begins to move, it’s so fast and animalistic that I can’t contain the screams. I’m so close, and before I know it, my whole world explodes.

“Fuck, you feel so good, babe.” He starts to slam into me even quicker, which I didn’t even think was possible. After a minute, he groans and begins to slow down. We collapse onto the bed together and I rest my head on his chest, turning so I’m looking at him, and smile.

“What?”

“I think that was the best birthday gift I’ve ever gotten.”

He laughs and kisses the top of my head. “Do you want to stay the night?” I nod my head. “Okay, good.” I get up so I can go to the bathroom and grab the clothes Shawn had given me earlier. I’m suddenly very aware of the fact I’m naked, so I grab the blanket and wrap it around me. “Babe, why are you covering up?”

“I don’t know, I’m going to jump in the shower, though.” I all but run out of the room. I don’t know why I’m so self-conscious. I turn the shower on and climb in under the water. I can’t stop smiling. Once I’m finished, I put on the clothes Shawn had given me. When I walk back into the room, he’s still lying down, and I crawl under the sheets with him. He wraps his arms around me, pulling me close to him.

“Goodnight, beautiful.”

Every time he calls me I get goose bumps. I close my eyes, and for the first time in a while, I’m happy.

Being with Christen last night was incredible. We have this crazy chemistry between us that is completely new to me. It’s almost like when she’s around, I’m drawn to her like a magnet. I can’t resist her, which is crazy because I barely noticed her before. I mean, I thought she was cute, but I never really noticed her until she came up to me after the fight.

I sneak out of bed and make my way into the kitchen to make a pot of coffee and search for something I might be able to make for breakfast. I hear footsteps coming, and when I turn around, Christen is walking in. Seeing her in my clothes is so much hotter than I could have imagined. She comes up to me and wraps her arms around my waist. “Good morning, beautiful.”

“Mmmm, it’ll be a lot better once I get some coffee.”

I laugh and lean down to give her a kiss. It seems so strange to have her here and be this comfortable with it. I feel like we’ve been together for a while, even though it’s only been a couple of days. This whole situation takes me back to when Carter was trying to talk to us about his feelings for Mads. We told him he was out of his mind because he barely knew her, but I get it now. You always hear those cheesy songs and see movies talking about how they were in love so soon, and I’m starting to think maybe they aren’t as unrealistic as I thought.

I’m not saying I love her already, but I can definitely see myself falling for her. I move away from her and grab a couple of coffee cups out of the cupboard. “I was going to try and make breakfast, but there isn’t much in this apartment besides frozen pizza, hot pockets, mac and cheese, and chips.”

“Ah, the joys of being a college student.”

“So, do you have any plans for today?” She shakes her head. “Okay, I want to take you somewhere then.”

“I’ll just need to stop at the house and get dressed.” We finish our coffee, I get dressed, and then we head over to Christen’s house. When we walk in, Jason and Nicole are yelling at each other about something. Those two are always going at it, but I think it’s their weird way of showing affection. I follow Christen upstairs, not wanting to get dragged into whatever drama is happening with them.

She must not have heard me behind her, because when she walks into her room and turns to shut the door, she jumps. “What are you doing?”

“I was just going to wait for you up here so that I didn’t get pulled into the episode of Jerry Springer going on down there.”

“I need to get dressed, though.”

I laugh and then realize she’s serious. “Babe, I saw you naked last night. What’s the big deal if I see you getting changed?”

We walk farther into her room and I shut the door. “Ugh! I don’t know! You can stay, just don’t watch me, okay?”

I swear to God I will never understand women.
I lie face down on the bed and bury my head in her pillow. I hear her moving around and just can’t help myself—I peek over at her. She’s standing in front of the closet in just a bra and panties. Seeing her like this makes me want to throw our plans for the day out the window and spend the rest of today in bed. I hide my face again before she can see me, even though I can’t understand why I’m not supposed to look.