Finding Eliza (22 page)

“Your moment?” Jack asked. He had the confused look on his face that Lizzie loved so much. It caused his nose to wrinkle and his laugh lines by his eyes to dance back and forth. It never ceased to amaze her how wrinkles looked good on this man.

“I learned about forgiveness, Jack. I need to give myself forgiveness and grace. Scripture was jumping out at me left and right tonight. I had to let it go, Jack. I can’t move forward unless I realize that I can’t hold onto all the heaviness of that night.” Lizzie leaned back into the chair and tilted her head to look outside toward the stars that she loved so much.

“This is all about Mr. Thomas and what happened tonight?”

“No, in fact, it went beyond that. I finally forgave myself. I know that I didn’t cause my parents’ accident. I get it now.”

Jack grabbed his wife in a hug that seemed to melt away any stress remaining between the couple.

“I knew you’d get there,” he said with a smile. “What made the difference this time?”

“I understand now that the anger is just going to eat me up. Alston taught me that. He taught me that God will give us the grace and forgiveness we need to make peace with ourselves. To do that, we need to forgive others first. I can’t keep going in circles, Jack. It’s going to eat me up if I do.”

“You have no idea how good that is to hear coming from you.”

Lizzie held her husband’s hand. “I can’t explain it, but I feel lighter. I feel happier. Isn’t that strange?”

“Not at all. It sounds like you’ve finally found peace. In finding what happened to Eliza, you found what you needed yourself.”

Lizzie hadn’t thought of it that way, but her husband was right. She thought that the journey through the diary was about finding out what happened to Eliza. She had never been so wrong.

“What do you want to do about Mr. Thomas?”

“I want to see him, Jack. I have to make sure he knows I forgive him before it’s too late.”

“Then, let’s go.” Jack took his wife by the hand and led her to the elevator that led to the cardiac unit. The short ride gave him just enough time to fill Lizzie in on the latest updates.

As soon as they stepped out of the elevator, Avery’s stomach dropped.

“Avery, how’s your grandfather?” Lizzie asked while she gave him a hug.

“The doctors think that they caught it in time. It was a heart attack, but it wasn’t massive. They expect him to head home before the end of the week. I didn’t expect to see you here. Are you all right?” Avery’s face showed the effects of stress and worry.

“I’m not here to hold a grudge, Avery. I’ve made my peace with the situation. I hope that you can, too. We can’t carry around the sins of our past, especially when what happened was out of our control. The choices your great-grandfather made that night were his and his alone. Your grandfather was just a child. Children can’t hold onto the guilt of the bad things that happen in life. It’s taken me a lifetime to figure that out.”

Avery sat down in the nearest chair. He looked shocked, and like the weight of the world had been lifted from his shoulders.

“Lizzie, thank you. Do you think that you could tell Gramps that? He’s so worried that he’ll lose the special relationship that he has with you.”

“That’s why I came here. I need him to know that I understand.”

“Let’s go see him then. He’s resting but awake,” said Avery as he led her down the hall to Thomas’ room.

Lizzie peeked around the corner and saw Thomas. To her, he looked like he had aged a decade in a few hours. His head was leaning back on a stack of several pillows. Eyes closed, his breathing was a little more labored than usual. Lizzie wasn’t sure if it was his health or the stress of the situation, but she was glad that she came when she did. She eased herself onto the edge of his bed and took his hand into hers.

“Mr. Thomas?” she whispered.

“Lizzie. I’m so glad to see you. I wanted to apologize, honey. I am so sorry for what I did.” The elderly man started crying softly as he turned his face away from her.

“Now, now, Mr. Thomas. Please don’t cry. I understand. I do. You were a child. You didn’t do anything wrong.” Lizzie leaned over to give her old friend a hug. “I want you to know something. My Grandpa Alston forgave you, too. He never blamed you once for what happened. The sins of our fathers are not our own. We have God’s grace, Mr. Thomas, and we have to share that grace with each other.”

Thomas wiped his eyes with a handkerchief that Avery handed him. “Are you sure about your great-grandfather? He told me that he forgave me, but I was never really sure that he truly felt that way. He loved his sister so much. That’s not something you can live through without harboring blame.”

“No, sir. My great-grandfather didn’t live that way. There was no grudge against you. It’s time to forgive yourself like he forgave you.” Lizzie reached into her bag for her great-grandfather’s diary. “Here, I’ll show you.”

Lizzie spent the next few minutes going through the diary with Thomas and Avery. With each entry she could see the stress and fear roll off not only Thomas’ face but off Avery’s as well. As she read the final entry, Thomas reached for her hand.

“Thank you, sweetheart.” He brought Lizzie’s hand to his parched lips and gave her a kiss. “You’ve done this old man a load of good tonight. I’ve been carrying that burden for years. I have been scared of you finding out for so long.”

“You don’t have to be scared anymore, Gramps,” said Avery.

Lizzie placed the diary back into her bag and returned to sit on the foot of the bed. “If you’d like to do something for me you can tell me about my Aunt Eliza. I don’t mean the details of this ordeal. I want to focus on her life, not her death. Did you know her?”

“Lizzie, dear, I adored your aunt. She was a good few years older but she always took the time to spend a moment with me at church or as we were walking to school. She was a gentle soul.” Thomas shifted to sit up higher in bed. “Everyone loved her.”

“It sounds like they did. I would have liked to meet her.”

“I wish you could have. It doesn’t surprise me that she never recovered from what happened though. Her spirit was so loving that she didn’t understand the pain and anger in the world. The world lost a brilliant light when she died.”

Lizzie smiled at the picture that he painted of Eliza.

“Gramps, how did you avoid becoming involved in the activities of the Klan with your father?” Avery stood against the wall across the room with his arms crossed over his chest. “That must have been hard for you to deal with as a child.”

“I was always a disappointment to my father. I wasn’t able to handle the same types of things that my brother could. I wasn’t able to slaughter the animals on the farm during killing times. I never was able to reconcile what they did to Eldridge and Eliza. I think he had given up on me.”

“Lucky for you,” said Jack. He had been so quiet that Lizzie had almost forgotten he was in the room.

“I don’t know that my mother would have let him if he tried. I remember the night that he took me to watch what they were doing. She was screaming and begging him to leave me alone. She didn’t stand a chance. My father was a rough man who didn’t mind taking a hand to her any more than he did to me or my brother. I think my mother was beat worse that day than I was for running away.”

“What do you mean?” Avery lowered himself into the chair next to his grandfather’s bed. “I don’t understand.”

“I told you that I was behind the tree that night. It scared me beyond anything that I had ever seen. I wasn’t expecting the screams. The look on their faces as the men hooted and hollered around them was a fear that I can’t wipe from my mind. I ran. I waited for a time when my father wasn’t looking, and I ran. I ran till I couldn’t stop. I didn’t have a neighbor to turn to or other family that wasn’t involved so I didn’t know where to go. My mother was damaged after the beating she took, so I couldn’t expect her to protect me. I hid in the barn for the night. It took him until the next afternoon to find me. I thought I wasn’t going to live after that beating.”

Lizzie sat listening in disbelief. Her grandmother had told her of Greer’s cruelness, but she didn’t expect to hear that he unleashed it upon his own family.

“Mr. Thomas, I’m so sorry you had to go through that,” said Lizzie.

“Gramps, your life had to be difficult. I never knew. Mama didn’t talk about it much.”

“I wouldn’t expect that she would. She wanted to be out of reach from the world my father created. He was a cruel man.”

“Gramps, you need to talk to her about this. She doesn’t know much about this period in our family, and I think you could clear up a lot of her questions. She needs the chance to heal, too.”

Thomas reached out a hand to pat his grandson on the shoulder and smiled. “You’re a good boy. I think I’ll enjoy having you here if you stay.”

“Speaking of staying,” said Lizzie, “I think we’ve overstayed our welcome. We need to let you get some rest so you can heal. We’ll need you back at the church soon.” Lizzie reached over to give Thomas a hug goodbye. Standing in the doorway to the hospital room, she noticed that she wasn’t the only one that looked lighter.

“Walk us out?” Lizzie asked Avery.

“Sure thing. I’ll be back, Gramps.” Avery walked over to hold the door open for his new friends.

The threesome walked down the hall toward the elevators. “Do you feel like you’ll move back to Everett Springs, Avery?” Lizzie asked.

“I’d say there’s a good chance of it now,” he responded with a wink.

Lizzie turned to Avery and gave him a hug. “Your grandfather is like family to me, so that means you’re like family to me. Don’t forget that. None of this need ever come up again. It will stay just between us. It will be our secret.”

“I’ve been thinking about that.” Avery leaned against the wall and put his hands in his pants pockets. “I might have an idea that you’ll like.”

Epilogue

Lizzie walked through the bright grass of the cemetery until she saw her family plot. No longer was the cemetery a place where Lizzie dreaded to go. She felt at home among the rows of headstones and flowers. Lizzie knelt down in front of her parents’ grave, careful not to mess up her skirt. She ran her fingers over her parents’ names as she read them in her heart.

“I miss you, but you’d be proud of me,” she said with a smile. “You’d be happy about today I think.”

After a quiet moment, she moved one plot over to her grandfather’s marker. She dusted off the base of the stone. “Miss you, Pops. Gran does, too.”

She moved again to the sit in front of headstone for her great-grandparents, Alston and Anne James. She needed a place to gather her thoughts before the day started, and it was fitting that she chose this spot. She glanced over her shoulder to see Jack standing next to her grandmother and the gals near the gates of the cemetery. She couldn’t help but smile when she thought of how far they had come in the last six months.

“Thank you, Alston, for including your heart and your faith in your diary. It has been a key to healing for our family and for the Abernathys as well. I think you’d like where our families ended up. It took me a while, but I finally understand the lessons that you wanted to leave behind. No one is too far from God’s grace and forgiveness, not even those who carry heavy burdens. You’d be proud of Thomas. He fought against his father’s way of life and dedicated himself to taking care of your family and your church. He has given us love and respect for decades, and he did it in your precious sister’s memory. We’re learning about her life, Gramps, and it’s great. Thanks for making sure we could find Eliza.”

Lizzie kissed her hand and placed it on her great-grandfather’s headstone. She knew that his spirit wasn’t there to hear her, but she felt closer to him after their conversation.

Lizzie looked over at Eliza’s headstone. She smoothed the front of her skirt before moving to stand next to the monument.

“Aunt Eliza, I am so thankful for your life. I’m so sorry that it had pain and sorrow. I pray that you are finally at peace. Your family will never forget you or Eldridge.” She paused to look toward the section of graves where he would lay for eternity. “You’ll both live on through the stories we’re about to tell. They took your life, but they didn’t stop your kind spirit. Your story will inspire us to respect and love each other. Your legacy is going to live on. I promise. We won’t let hatred win.”

Lizzie stood back to take in the full view of the cemetery before joining the others. A lot had changed over the last two seasons. She tilted her head back, closed her eyes, and let the bright summer sun land on her face. Warmth spread down over her into the places where stress used to live. Lizzie was finally relaxed and at peace.

People began to gather near the speaking tent. Lizzie smiled when she realized that the group included descendants from all three families. The children and grandchildren of Eldridge’s siblings came from as far away as Oklahoma. Along with Gertrude and Lizzie, several cousins made the trip in Eliza’s memory. Avery Abernathy’s mother and father came to support Thomas as he took a public stand against the KKK's actions in the county. Other small groups gathered together in support of their own losses. Avery’s idea to plan a family memorial for Eldridge and Eliza had turned into a full-scale community history event.