Fire & Ice (The Locklaine Boys #1) (26 page)

“Pepper,” Griffin tried again, but Slut-zilla was there.

“She’s right,” the woman purred, “we don’t want to be late.”

I looked at Wendy, knowing she was my best chance of getting them out the door quickly before I lost it. Snuggling Ivy against my chest, I absorbed as much of her sweet warmth as I could, needing it to ground me. “It’s about time you had a night out with adults. Go go. I’ve got this here.”

“You sure?” she asked, looking at me strangely.

“Absolutely. Go, have fun.” I started moving backward just as Griffin took a step in my direction.

“Come on, Griffin,” Kat giggled as she pulled on his arms. I’d never wanted to punch someone as much as I did just then.

“No,” he started. “I think—”

“Go,” I cut in, my tone much stronger and much harder than before. I turned on my heels and headed for the kitchen, the farthest room from the front door. I didn’t want to see him walk out the door, but I couldn’t bear to look him in the eye for another second.

“Pe Pe,” Ivy cried, her tiny fist hitting my jaw lightly. It was crazy how a one-year old child was so in tune with a grownup’s emotions. When I looked her way she leaned in and planted a messy baby kiss on the corner of my mouth.

“Thank you, sweetheart,” I whispered. My voice broke on a choked sob. “Auntie Pep Pep’s okay,” I lied. That couldn’t have been further from the truth. At the sound of the front door closing my already cracking heart splintered and shattered in my chest. “I’m okay,” I repeated, trying desperately to make myself believe it as the tears finally broke loose.

WHAT THE HELL WAS
I doing? I couldn’t believe what a fucking idiot I was. I’d been in such a state of disbelief that I’d actually allowed a woman I didn’t even know or like to pull me out the door and into the back of a cab, away from the woman I loved, the woman who looked absolutely fucking
wrecked
when she’d seen another woman with her arms clinging to me.

It took me until the cab stopped in front of the restaurant to clear the fog I seemed to have been wandering in for the past ten minutes and by the time I came out of it, I wanted to kick my own ass.

“Griff? You okay?” Wendy asked, concern lacing her words as Dex closed the taxi door and stepped onto the sidewalk next to her.

“I have to go,” I announced.

“What?” Dex asked.

“I have to go. This was a huge mistake. I shouldn’t be here.”

I pounded on the roof of the cab to get the driver’s attention before it had a chance to pull away. Just as I wrenched the door open, Dex stepped up next to me and put his hand on my shoulder. “Whoa. Griff, man. What’s going on? You okay?”

“No, I’m not fucking okay,” I shot back frantically. Every second it took to get back to Pepper was another second she’d be able to convince herself of something that wasn’t the truth. It was another second she had to re-erect those walls she put around herself to keep me out, to convince herself she was better off without me.

I couldn’t let that happen.

I wouldn’t.

No fucking way was I losing her. Not again.

Standing in the opened door of the cab, I turned to my best friend and laid it all out there, no longer giving a single damn if he took it well or not. “I’m in love with your sister,” I admitted out loud for the first time.

He stared for several seconds, his mouth hanging open. “Wait… what?”

Ignoring the shocked gasp from Wendy, I pushed on. “I’m in love with Pepper. And if I don’t get my ass back there, she’s going to think tonight was something it wasn’t. I can’t let her think that, man. I came over to tell you guys that Pepper and I are together. I didn’t know about…” I turned toward Kat and waved my arm as my lip curled in disgust, “…
that
. And before I had a chance to explain the situation went completely fuckin’ tits up. I have to fix it.”

I barely registered anything happening around me as the perplexity melted from my best friend’s expression, quickly replaced with poorly-restrained anger. “Are you fuckin’ kidding me?!”

“Dex,” Wendy stepped up to her husband, resting her palms on his heaving chest, “calm down.”

“No goddamned way!” he all but shouted. “I won’t fucking calm down! You’ve been sleeping with Pepper? Jesus, Griffin! She’s not one of your whores! She’s my
sister
!”

“Hey man,” the cab driver called. “You getting in the car or what?”

“Hold on!” I snapped at him, before turning my focus back to the train wreck in front of me. “It’s not like that,” I struggled to make him understand. “I’m in love with her. I want to be with her.”

“You’re not good enough for her!”

“Dex!” Wendy shouted, trying to get her husband’s attention. “Stop it! Just calm down before you say something you don’t mean.”

“I’m not gonna wait here all night!” The cab driver yelled.

“Just hold the fuck on!” I shouted back, using my anger to mask the fact that Dex’s words had just taken a huge, painful chunk out of me, leaving me wrecked and bleeding.

“No. No!” he continued to rage. “I’m not sayin’ anything that isn’t the goddamned truth!” Pushing against Wendy’s hold, he moved closer to me. “Stay the hell away from my sister, Griffin. I mean it. You don’t, me and you got some serious fucking problems. Is that clear?”

I lowered my voice, trying in vain to calm myself down as my heart beat against my ribs so hard I thought it might pound right through my chest. “I’m not gonna do that, brother. She makes me happy. More importantly, I make
her
happy. I got all the love in the world for you man, you know that. But if you’re telling me I have to choose between you and her, I’m gonna pick her. Every fucking time.”

With that, I turned and climbed into the back of the cab and slammed the door. I didn’t look back at the three people standing at the curb. I couldn’t think about anything other than getting back to Pepper. She was all that mattered. I couldn’t find it in me to give a shit about anyone’s feelings but hers.

I just hoped I could make her see the truth.

“
COME ON, SWEETIE,” I
coaxed. “It’s green beans. Yum, yum, yum!” Ivy smacked the spoon away from her mouth, sending the puke-colored, foul-smelling baby food flying through the air until it landed with a gross sounding
splat
on the highchair tray and floor.

I couldn’t really blame her for not wanting to eat something that looked and smelled like something that had been created in a blender as an attempt to save all the close-to-spoiled leftovers in a person’s fridge. I gagged just opening the damned jar.

“You have to eat your vegetables or Mommy said no bananas as dessert,” I held the jar of bananas up to my eyes and curled my lip in disgust. “Although I’m not sure how she can consider this dessert. It literally looks like snot.” Ivy mumbled a bunch of words in baby talk that I was convinced was her agreeing with me about the poor excuse for food.

I scooped up another spoonful of green beans and held them out to my niece, only to have her smack it away again, this time splattering it across my face and shirt. As I sat there in shock, Ivy began to giggle hysterically from her high chair. “Glad you think that’s funny,” I told her, unable to contain my smile at the adorable sound of a baby’s laughter.

Standing from my chair, I went over and grabbed a dishcloth from the sink and began wiping at the ugly greenish-brown stains on my shirt just as the doorbell rang. “Fucking great,” I muttered to myself, low enough where Ivy couldn’t hear the bad word. With Ivy’s help, I’d managed to tamp my depressed mood down for the past half hour. It was amazing how a smiling baby could ease a person’s crushing heartbreak, but that didn’t mean I was in any mood to deal with
adult
company.

Throwing the soiled towel on the counter, I started for the door, hoping I could get rid of whoever was standing there quickly so I could give Ivy a bath, put her to bed, and spend the remainder of the evening wallowing in a pint of Ben and Jerry’s I’d found in Wendy and Dex’s freezer. It wasn’t an oatmeal crème pie, but it would do.

“I’m coming!” I called out in agitation as the bell rang again, followed by incessant knocking.

“Pepper, open the door!” At the sound of Griffin’s deep, agitated voice my entire body froze solid. “I know you’re in there. Open the damn door!”

At that, my startled surprise morphed into anger. Stomping the last few feet to the front door, I yelled through it, “Go away!”

“I’m not going anywhere, Pepper. Open the door, okay? We need to talk, baby. That wasn’t what you thought it was, I swear to God.”

I hadn’t thought there was anything left of my demolished heart to break, but as he spoke through the door I quickly discovered I was wrong. I gasped at the sharp pain radiating through my chest like a knife wound.

“You’re a
liar
!” I shouted, unable to keep the agony out of my voice. “Everything you say is a lie! I don’t want to hear anything else you have to say. Just leave, Griffin.”

“I’m not leaving this goddamned stoop until you open the door and listen to me! I didn’t lie to you—”

“Really?” I interrupted with a sarcastic laugh. “So you’re going to tell me you’ve really been working late tonight? I guess everything I saw tonight was a mirage, huh?”

No sound came through the door for several seconds before I finally heard a muffled, “
Fuck
!”

“Look,” he continued. “I can explain that, okay? I promise, it’s not what you think. Just open the door, sweetness.
Please
.”

I had to rest my palms and forehead against the cool wood of the door to brace against the onslaught of emotions coursing through me at the anguish in his voice. With every passing second I felt my resolve weakening and I hated myself for it. Luckily, Ivy’s sudden cry from the dining room broke through the thick fog threatening to pull me under and gave me the strength I needed to finish things once and for all.

“You need to leave, Griffin,” I said, thankful my voice didn’t crack.

“No. I’m not leaving! We’re going to talk about this. I’m gonna fix this, Pepper.”

“There’s nothing to fix,” I told him in an emotionless tone. “We’re done. Whatever fucked up game you were playing, it’s over. I’m not doing this with you anymore.”