Fire in the Blood (4 page)

Chapter 4

The unlikely new partnership then left the office and made their way to a gap site car park in a nearby side street, where Jack removed several parking tickets which were stuck to the windscreen of a filthy, scarred Mk 2 Ford Mondeo. He threw the keys across the bonnet to Annie, to allow her to unlock the car door and reluctantly get behind the wheel. She then pulled violently on the stiff driver’s door to get it to close properly, and adjusted the seat, safety belt and mirrors.

As she settled into the driver’s seat, Annie was clearly unhappy. ‘Who did you buy this heap from? Mad Max Motors?’

Jack feigned offence and said, ‘What do you mean?’

Resigned, Annie started the engine but then paused before engaging first gear.
‘Look boss, is there anything
vital
I should know about the car,
before
we head off?’

Jack proudly patted the dashboard before replying, ‘Yes, of course, her name’s Senga and she’ll be twelve next month.’

‘No I mean, like, is it safe to drive, is it insured, are the brakes and steering okay? Minor details like that.’

Clearly enjoying Annie’s discomfiture Jack smiled. ‘Of course it’s safe to drive. She sailed through her last MOT. Just after Scotland last qualified for the World Cup it was.’

She gave him a quizzical sideways look, which suggested that her next job interview might not be long delayed and then they set off.

After rummaging around in the glove box Jack added, ‘Oh there is one thing you need to know. Senga definitely goes better when there’s some music playing.’ He then inserted a cassette tape in the dashboard player and Dwight Yoakam started to wail, “If You Were Me and I Were You”.

Clearly not enjoying either the test drive, or the music, Annie scowled as if Jack had just produced a large fresh dog turd from his pocket and said accusingly, ‘That’s a homemade compilation tape, isn’t it? My dad used to make
them
.’

Lost in the music and seemingly oblivious to Annie’s disapproval, Jack tapped his fingers on the dashboard. ‘Yeah, as they say on the television adverts, this bad boy is
not
available in the shops.’

Annie rolled her eyes and muttered, ‘There’s a good reason for that, because it’s complete mince.’

Jack suddenly became aware that he hadn’t had so much fun in ages, and he continued baiting Annie by asking innocently, ‘I could make you a copy, if you like.’

Rather too quickly Annie snapped back, ‘No
way
. Sorry, I mean, no thanks. I’m honestly not that into country music, no offence.’

‘None taken, but you’re still young. Don’t worry, Annie, it’ll creep up on you as you get older, probably coinciding with early onset memory loss, which in my case happened just after I turned forty. One day I was walking down the street and, right out of blue, I suddenly found myself humming “The Lost Highway” and headed off in completely the wrong direction.’

Annie then gave Jack her ‘
I’m listening and nodding, but I don’t have a fucking clue what you’re talking about
’ look and said, ‘Oh well, that’s something to look forward to then. But I
do
like
some
older songs, you know, like Robbie Williams early ones.’

‘Christ, that’s not old. Now,
Hank
Williams stuff …
that’s
old. I tell you what Annie, when I die I’ll leave you my entire collection of country music tapes, so you can enjoy them and remember me.’

‘Gee thanks, boss. Money would be better.’

The car then emitted a thunderous backfire, which Jack completely ignored, as Annie gingerly eased the Mondeo out into the heavy city centre traffic.

‘This is
so
scary, why don’t you buy a decent car?”

“Look, this is the
perfect
car for a private detective. Old cars are just like older people, they’re completely invisible to most of the population, especially the younger generation.’

‘I’m sorry, I don’t understand what you mean.’

‘Of course you don’t, Annie. How could you? You’re twenty-four and I’m … well, I’m probably just a couple of years older than George Clooney. But trust me, when you’re my age and you’re jumping up and down, waving your arms about like an idiot, to try and get served in a busy pub, it’ll
all
become crystal clear.’

Annie was unconvinced. ‘Well, if you say so.’

‘Okay then, let’s try something to demonstrate what I mean. This is a test of your observational skills. We stopped at a pedestrian crossing a minute ago, right, and two people crossed in front of the car.’

‘Yeah,
so
?’

‘
So
… describe them both to me.’

Concentrating hard, Annie bit her lip before replying, ‘Okay wait. Don’t tell me, let me think. They were both male, right?’

Sarcastically Jack said, ‘
Very
good, anything else?’

‘Wait, wait … I
do
remember, one guy was about twenty-five, maybe around six foot tall, slim with nice long curly hair. Yeah, and he was wearing a cute leather jacket, with
really
tight black jeans and very cool red shoes. He looked as if he spends a lot of time in the gym, probably admiring himself in the mirror most of the time. Nice tight bum though.’

‘That’s e
xcellent
. So, what about the
other
one?’

Annie was dismissive and said, ‘The
other
one? I honestly can’t remember much about him. Oh, I think he maybe had some kind of trousers on and he had grey hair, but I’m honestly not sure.’

Jack spluttered, ‘Of course he had bloody trousers on. So obviously, he’s just another boring, invisible old fart, right?’

‘Yeah, I
suppose
so.’

‘I rest my case.’

Annie had to reluctantly concede that her new boss had just made a valid point and said, ‘Fair enough, slap on wrist Annie. Must try harder.’

‘Well I thought the older guy was smartly dressed and he had a slight limp, probably an old football injury, and his hair was cut short with no attempt to hide his bald spot. He also had a hearing aid in his left ear and he was wearing what looked like a nice Italian jacket, probably from Marks & Spencer. He could be a professional man who’s maybe taken early retirement. My point Annie is that, unless you’re actually
working
at it, we all subconsciously concentrate on our own peer group. It’s just human nature, not rocket science.’

Nodding in agreement, Annie then innocently asked, ‘So master, what colour was the young guy’s hair?’

Jack was dismissive. ‘I’ve absolutely no idea, but I do remember he was a cocky looking young bastard, probably a shirt lifter. To be honest, if I’d been driving, I would’ve run him over.’

They both laughed and continued towards their lunch venue.

Chapter 5

Annie got lucky and found a parking space right outside the Royal Bar, a traditional Glasgow watering hole, which for eight decades had wilfully resisted all pressure to be trendy. She went inside with Jack and they took two stools at the original ornate horseshoe bar where the landlady, Peggy McKay, was busy polishing pint glasses. She was pleased when she looked up and saw that Jack was not alone.

‘Good afternoon, Mr Davidson. I see you’ve got the new start with you.’

Jack smiled and made the introduction. ‘Meet Assistant Investigator Annie James.’

Peggy was suddenly deadly serious and gave Jack the sternest of warnings. ‘Now you remember to look after her, Jack Davidson, she’s just a
wean
.’

The
wean
rolled her eyes, looking thoroughly embarrassed, and pleaded, ‘Auntie Peg, please. I’m twenty-four, for God’s sake.’

‘Okay, I’m just saying, Jack. I don’t want to see a single mark on her. You keep her safe inside that office of yours, away from all the crazy people in this city. Or you’ll be in
big
trouble, right?’

‘You have my word of honour, Peggy.’

Peggy gave Jack the old fish eye and said, ‘Aye,
that’s
what I’m worried about.’

Anxious to move the conversation along, Jack picked up a menu and asked, ‘Anyway can I have a pint of Best and give Annie whatever she wants.’

‘A diet Coke please, auntie.
I’m
driving, remember.’

When their drinks arrived, Jack savoured a long swallow from his pint and then took a cigarette from his packet and played around with it.

Shaking her head, Peggy marked Annie’s card regarding her new boss’s lifestyle. ‘This one’s your typical Glasgow man, Annie, definitely
old
school. You know, hard drinking, smokes like a lum, and doesn’t exercise or eat properly.’

Jack snorted and said, ‘Look, if I wanted to eat
properly
, I wouldn’t be coming in
here,
would I? I’ll have my usual lunch please, Peggy, if you can stop harassing your best customer for a minute.’

He then passed the menu to Annie who was curious, and asked, ‘So what is your usual lunch?’

Rubbing his hands in anticipation, Jack replied, ‘I usually have a big plate of Peggy’s home-made vegetable soup, followed by double mince pie, thick cut chips, beans and beef gravy. It’s fantastic, the food of the gods. Puts a good thick lining in my stomach and lasts me all day.’

Annie nodded in understanding, before observing, ‘That explains it. The nasty smell I can’t get rid of in the office.
And
in your car. Oh, and did I mention that when I was cleaning up in the office, I found two dead mice huddled together right underneath your chair?’

‘Really?’ said Jack, unconcerned. ‘It was probably a suicide pact. Apparently it happens all the time in the animal kingdom.’

‘Well
my
theory is that the poor little things were unlucky enough to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. They probably took a direct hit from one of your farts and it stopped them dead in their tracks.’

Jack was genuinely embarrassed
.
‘Okay, fair enough, I accept that now I have a co-worker, I maybe need to try and reduce my, ahem, carbon emissions. And I suppose I could get one of those little pine tree thingies for the car.’

Annie remained unconvinced and said, ‘Well maybe if you soaked it in gravy and ate it …
that
might help. Just a Diet Coke and a buttered roll with a bag of plain crisps for me please, Auntie Peg.’

‘Seriously, Jack, I’ve told you this before, at your age you really need to be thinking about making some changes to your lifestyle,’ added Peggy.

‘It’s funny you should say that. I read an article just last night on the dangers to health of heavy drinking and some of the statistics they quoted were quite horrific, really. You know, describing the self-inflicted damage we’re all doing to our bodies, supposedly in the name of enjoyment. Anyway it definitely struck a chord with me and I decided there and then,
whoa
boy, that’s it for me.’

Peggy looked surprised and pleased at the apparent change of heart from one of her regular customers. ‘Well good for you, Jack. Not before time, some might say.’

Jack paused for effect, before adding, ‘Yeah, I’m never reading any of that health scare bullshit
ever
again. Get me another pint, Peggy, when you have a minute.’

As Peggy shook her head and turned away to get Annie’s order, she paused. ‘By the way, there’s a guy been asking for you, Jack.’

‘Who is he?’

‘I don’t know, but he seems respectable enough. He’s through the back, over in the corner.’

Jack took his pint and walked to the rear of the pub, to join the stranger sitting in a corner booth.

Once Jack was out of earshot, Peggy took the opportunity to sit down beside her favourite niece. ‘I’m really pleased you got the job, Annie. Please try and stick with this one for a wee while at least. Jack’s a decent man, but he’s had a rough time of it recently what with the divorce and then losing his driving licence. It’ll be good for him not to be working on his own
all the time. He’s been drinking
way
too much.’

‘I think the job could be
really
interesting, I mean assuming we get on okay. But first impressions are alright, although he can be a bit weird. But for an old guy he’s quite funny with it.’

Peggy looked at Annie and then smiled. ‘So, he’s a bit weird, but funny with it. You’ve both got something in common then.’
She then left to serve another customer as Jack returned to his seat.

‘So what kind of cases do you normally work on?’ asks Annie, between bites at her roll.

‘It’s a bit of a mixture. There’s some work on missing persons, other times I might be trying to trace money, or recover missing cars, or property of any kind. And it’s not just for private clients, there’s also occasional work from lawyers and insurance companies. In fact that’s what we’ll be working on this afternoon, a fraudulent injury claim.’

‘It sounds exciting.’

‘Believe me, it’s not. The main excitement in my life these days is when the new Argos catalogue comes out. What you have to understand, Annie, is that this business is
nothing
like the crime shows you see on television. I don’t
do
car chases or ponce around in darkened rooms with a torch. Okay, I tell a lie, there was that one time when I forgot to pay the electricity bill for the office and the power was turned off. Anyway, our work is a bit lower down the food chain than the telly detectives. It’s all basic stuff really, usually involving theft, risk taking and downright stupidity.’

Peggy heard this explanation as she brought Jack’s heaped lunch plate to the table and chipped in with perfect timing, ‘Aye, and
that’s
just his tax return.’

Ignoring Peggy’s jibe and now in full teaching mode, Jack continued
,
‘Seriously, there are just three rules you need to remember Annie. First, assume
everyone
is lying until you can prove otherwise. Second there are
no
coincidences in this business and last and most important,
always
follow the money trail, that’s where any mystery usually begins and ends.’

‘I should really get a notebook and write all this stuff down. Is there anything else I need?’

‘Yes, you’ll need to get a permit.’

Annie then got slightly ahead of herself and gasped,
‘Oh my God, you mean for a
gun?
’

‘No, it’s so you can use the car park in the gap site behind the office. The last permit expired weeks ago.’

‘So, what was the guy through the back after?’

‘Oh him, he had some information he offered to sell,’ Jack replied mysteriously.

‘If I’m being a nosey cow, just say?’

‘Being nosey is good in this game. But I’ll tell you about it another time, Annie, it’s a long story.’