First Degree Innocence (7 page)

Carrie cupped her chin and rubbed her forefinger back and forth over her top lip. “I can’t imagine what it would be. I basically accused her of being a lesbian and she denied it. And despite everything I’ve heard from you and the other girls, Jet has been mostly pleasant. There’s just something unsettling about her interest in me.”

“She has something against this cellblock.” Susanna perched on the edge of her bunk and stared at the floor. “I’ve thought about it until my brain is fried. Why pick on you? You’re new, you know only a few people here, and if you’ve been truthful, there’s no one on the outside that can be of value to her.”

“It’s true. I’m alone. I already told you I have a father somewhere, but he couldn’t care less about me. Besides, I haven’t seen him in years. If Jet is looking for someone with outside connections, she’s picked the wrong girl.”

“Damn, then what could it be?” Susanna straightened, her teeth clenched.

Carrie slowly shook her head. “You aren’t the only one who’s killed a thousand brain cells trying to figure this out.” She grimaced. “I guess I’ll find out soon enough.”

A lump thickened in her throat.

* * * * *

The hallway lights dimmed, throwing odd shadows off the bars onto the cell’s ceiling. Carrie stared at them with hands locked behind her head, still trying to make sense of Jet’s interest in her. Nothing came. She rolled to her side, and hung over the mattress. “Are you still awake?”

“Uh huh,” Susanna answered. “I can’t sleep.”

“Me either. And I’m sick of thinking about Jillian Duke. Feel like talking about something else?”

Susanna snickered. “Sure, let’s make plans for our upcoming trip to the Caribbean.”

“Very funny.” Despite sounding cynical, her mind flashed to white beaches and crashing waves. “Tell me more about yourself.”

“Now there’s an exciting story. What do you want to know that I haven’t already told you?”

“Do you have family? Brothers, sisters? I wish I did.”

The plastic mattress crackled with Susanna’s movement. “I have two brothers, but I haven’t seen them for a long time. One is older, the other younger. My mother and father divorced when I was in high school, and I lived with my mom. She’s not in the best of health and only comes to visit when she’s up to it. My brothers pretty much disowned me when I got involved with Doug. They tried to tell me that he was worthless, but I wouldn’t listen. As for my dad, he remarried and lives in another state with his new family. I never hear from him.”

A pang of sadness plucked at Carrie’s heart. There was another connection between them. Both had fathers who had forgotten their daughters existed.

Susanna heaved a loud sigh. “I wish I had heeded my brothers’ warning. Doug was the biggest mistake of my life. Now that I look back on it, he never loved me like I loved him, he just wanted someone to fetch and carry for him. I think I broke my mom’s heart when I moved in with him.”

“Where did you meet?”

“In high school, of all places. He left during our senior year then came back about three years later. He was so smooth and good-looking; he swept me off my feet. I had plans to go to college, but never got there. Instead, I got a job as a health aide at a local nursing home with the intent of becoming a licensed vocational nurse.”

“That’s a good profession.”

“It would have been if I could have paid for it. All my wages went up Doug’s nose, and it didn’t take long before depression wore me down and I started using. I even lost my job. Then, of course, you know the rest of the story. The cops came, found the stash Doug had just acquired to sell, and he so lovingly blamed the whole thing on me, claiming he was just an innocent victim.”

Carrie detected the hurt in her friend’s voice. “That must have been horrible.”

“It was. I felt like a low-life loser. I’d never been in trouble with the law, but just like you, I couldn’t buy some fancy-pants lawyer to get me off with a slap on the wrist. So here I am, my first offense, wiling away fifteen years of my life in this hellhole. My only solace is that I had evidence to prove that Doug was the real dealer. I knew the name of his supplier and the police bargained with him to sell out Doug. I’m pretty sure he’s not enjoying life any more than I am, at least I don’t think so. He got double my sentence.”

“Then I guess there’s some justice with the law.” Carrie rolled onto her back and stretched, stifling a yawn. “At least you have the pleasure of knowing the real culprit is paying for his crime. I can’t stop thinking about how those who actually robbed the bank are still out there, foot loose and fancy-free, while I’m here for something I didn’t do. It makes me sick. I had plans for my life, too, and it sure as hell didn’t involve prison.”

“What kind of job did you have?”

“I’ve always been good with people and numbers, so I landed an apprenticeship with a marketing company. The money wasn’t there in the beginning, but it had promise. It was something I had to work my way into. As ideas were introduced to the firm, my job was to research the viability of the product, so I spent a lot of time with a clipboard, polling people for their opinions. Afterwards, I compiled the data into projected earnings and presented it to the board of directors for their decision. I really loved what I did… and I had hopes.” Old anger resurfaced and Carrie’s eyes brimmed with tears. She used her sleeve to dry them.

“Do you ever think of getting married and having children?” Susanna asked.

“Of course, don’t most girls? I haven’t found a guy I connected with. Or slept with. Oh, I suffered through several cases of puppy love in junior high, and had a real crush on Guy Frasier in high school, but the creep didn’t even ask me to the prom. We went out a few times then he dumped me because I wasn’t easy enough for him. I’m not going to admit how few dates I’ve been on, but every guy had his own agenda, and sex was at the top of the list. When and if I get married it’s going to be to someone who thinks I’m worth the wait.”

Susanna’s chortle sliced the momentary silence. “Still a virgin? My God, how rare is that? I envy you being smart enough to withstand the pressures. Doug wasn’t my first, but I hoped he’d be my last. What a fool I was.”

“Don’t be so hard on yourself. I have no money, my car was impounded, I’ve lost the lease on my apartment, and I’m pretty sure I was fired from my job. It seems that my virginity is all I have.”

“Well, aren’t we a couple of winners? It almost sounds like a novel in the making. Do you want to write it or should I?” Susanna chuckled through a yawn. “Maybe we’d better forget the book. Even I find the plot boring. I’m pretty sure I can sleep now.”

“Okay,” Carrie muttered, stretching her arms over her head and yawning. “See you in the morning.”

As she drifted off to sleep, the piercing blue eyes of her mystery man crossed through her mind one more time. He was much better material for a romance novel, and certainly more interesting to think about than what Jillian Duke had planned. Carrie’s mind spun. Why was Jet so interested in her and what did the woman have up her sleeve?

Chapter Seven

Carrie choked down the last bite of breakfast. “Ugh, did you really have a hand in preparing this?” She held up a rubbery slice of bread, its edges soggy with juice that had escaped the small compartment of peaches on the tray. “I believe in crunchy toast.”

Susanna glanced at her own food, picked up her limp bread and laughed. The sound bounced off the back cell wall and echoed into the vacant hallway. “I seem to have a matching piece. Kitchen help can only do so much with what they’re given. I get the distinct feeling that management doesn’t give a crap about our opinions on the meals. It’s not like we can run out for something else.” She tilted her head back and groaned. “What I wouldn’t give for a big ol’ hamburger with onions, pickles, lettuce and tomato.”

“Add in a sesame seed bun and you have a commercial.” Carrie flashed a grin. “Besides, you’re making my mouth water. I swear the last burger served here was once someone’s shoe. And you’d think the kitchen manager could at least spring for more than a spoonful of condiments… and real lettuce instead of that stalky stuff.”

“Romaine? Oh, they buy that because it’s probably cheaper at the moment. We sometimes get the good, crisp leafy lettuce, but not often.” She licked her lips and rolled her eyes. “Mmm, wouldn’t you just kill for a chef salad?”

“Stop! You’re torturing me and it’s not nice. It’ll be a long time before I taste good cooking again.” The corners of Carrie’s mouth sagged into a frown.

Scuffling across the cell in sock-clad feet, Susanna put her breakfast tray on the floor next to the door, then turned, a wistful look on her face. “I’d really like to get out of kitchen duty. Not that it matters, but I’ve never been very good at cooking. I enjoyed having breakfast with you for a change. I only got part of the day off because they’re breaking in some new help and decided to make those unfortunate souls handle the whole meal process from start to finish. I wish they’d decide they didn’t need me.”

Carrie clucked her tongue against the back of her teeth. “That’ll only happen if they think you want to be there.” Funny how cynical she’d become in such a short time. She added her tray atop Susanna’s and leaned against the cell door, rubbing her hands together. “So, what do you wanna do now? Tennis? Swimming? Oh, how about a quick game of polo? I’ll ring the help and have them saddle the horses.”

Susanna chuckled, reached for and threw her laundry bag, bouncing it off Carrie’s arm. “And you talk about me torturing you?” Her mood turned somber. “What am I going to do when they move you? You always make me laugh.”

“I don’t really want to think about it right now.” Carrie turned and peered through the bars. She’d much rather stay right where she was, but unfortunately, she didn’t have a say in the matter. Nothing about prison was fair.

Stretching crosswise on her bunk, her feet on the floor, Susanna’s fingers traced the lines in the wall’s cement blocks. “If only we could enjoy the lifestyle of the rich and famous. Instead, here we are, poor and infamous.” She raised her head and scrunched her face. “Well maybe that’s a little overstated. That would mean that someone actually knew we were here and cared.”

Carrie felt a pang of sadness, knowing there was no one out there who gave a damn about her. She prepared to climb up on the top bunk when keys jingled in the lock and drew her attention to the door.

* * * * *

Ogden crossed the cell and stopped when her nose was only inches from Carrie’s. Tobacco stained the guard’s teeth and fouled her breath. “I couldn’t give a flying fuck about what you think. Is that clear?” Ogden roared.

“Yes, perfectly.” Carrie nodded, tired of the confrontation. Her opinion carried no weight, she knew that, but it would have been stupid not to try one more time to convince her uniformed nemesis that she really had no desire to share a cell with Jillian Duke. Unfortunately, Carrie’s show of reluctance had done nothing more than provide satisfaction for Ogden’s ego and gave Carrie a tension headache. She massaged her furrowed brow.

The corpulent guard opened the door and stepped out into the hallway. “Since we finally agree, you’ll gather up your things on Friday, and I’ll personally escort you to your new home. The gals on C block will be happy to see you.”

Anger seethed like fire in Carrie’s veins. All the questions she wanted answers to hung on her tongue, but she swallowed them, knowing anything she said would be used against her. What kind of perverse pleasure was Ogden getting out of this?

The door clanked shut and she departed without another word, leaving Carrie fuming.

Susanna rolled to the mattress’ edge, leaving the shadows where she’d lurked. “Oh, I hate that woman.”

Carrie released a long breath. “Not nearly as much as I do. She’s been in my face ever since I got here.”

The urge to kick something overwhelmed her, but she shook her head and considered the consequences. Metal and toes didn’t mesh well.

With a sigh, she leaned against the bars then sagged to the floor and hugged her knees against her chest. “I’m not going to let this get to me. That’s what Ogden wants. On Friday, I’ll be ready when she gets here. If I’m not smiling, poke me or something. I can’t let her see my vulnerable side. I’m going to be the most agreeable inmate she’s ever seen, and hopefully it’ll drive her crazy.”

Susanna crawled off her bed, dropped her bottoms and sat on the commode. “I admire your courage, but I’d be a little more worried about what Jet has in store for you.”

“Thanks for the reminder. It’s not like it hasn’t been weighing on my mind.”

The flushing of the toilet somehow seemed like a perfect analogy for Carrie’s life. She chewed her bottom lip. “I wonder how much longer it is until rec time. I need some fresh air to help me think.”

A flash of blue eyes invaded her thoughts. Maybe she’d catch a glimpse of them again.

* * * * *

Carrie walked through the exit to the outside rec area. The early June temperature kept most of the other inmates close to the air conditioning, and her friends huddled around a table inside, sharing the same old war stories. She had no desire to rehash the topic of her earlier meeting with Ogden. In truth, Carrie preferred to forget about it for now. There was no use stressing over the inevitable.

She stepped off the sidewalk and onto the basketball court, but backed off, finding her shoes stuck to asphalt heated by the late afternoon sun. Following the pavement, she wove her way to her favorite spot, overlooking the garden. A dry wind blew past the end of the building and whipped her hair around her face. The air smelled of dust. With fingers entwined through the chain links, she stole a sideways glance at the place where she last saw the male guard.

He wasn’t there; her spirit sagged. Why had she thought he would be? She was being nothing more than a silly schoolgirl, thinking he, of all people in the world, would have an interest in her. His job was to guard the inmates, hers was to be one. She blew out a long, exasperated breath, wishing she was anywhere else.