First Love (27 page)

"Okay … what’s going on? You three look awful guilty. Who is going to start explaining?" I say sternly and look between the three of them.

"I will," says Sheriff Beasley from out of nowhere. Where did he come from? Why is he here? Oh no, the flowers … they were from him.

"Let me see that card again," I say to Holly who is trying to hide it behind her back. Obviously, she is doing a terrible job of it. Beasley nods to her and she hands it to me. I take a deep breath and then read it.

My Amber,

I told you I was watching your every move just waiting for the right moment. You were beautiful today in that dress. Such a shame you want to waste such beauty on someone so unworthy as Kyle. We will be together soon and you can wear it for me instead. I am the only one who can understand the pain you suffered when you lost your mother. We share a bond that will hold us together through eternity. I will come for you very soon and take you away from all of those people who pretend to love you. Together we will be reunited with the loved ones we have lost. He can't keep you from me forever.

Love,

Beau

I drop the card and quickly run to the bathroom. I barely make it before I’m emptying my stomach into the toilet bowl. Once I am sure there is nothing left, I flush the toilet and stand. I go to the sink, rinse my mouth out, and splash some water on my face. Time to go find out what everyone has been hiding from me and why. Do they think I can’t handle whatever has been going on? Well, I'll show them. I march my ass into the living room. They are all looking at me like they are puppies that just peed on the carpet, and I am getting ready to scold them and rub their noses in it. Kyle starts to get up and walk to me, but I throw my hand up and stop him dead in his tracks.

"Obviously the four of you have been keeping something from me. First, I want to know why." I put my hand up to keep anyone from answering. “Do you all think I am some weak little girl who can't handle whatever is going on? And second, I want to know
everything
you have been keeping from me. Now, you may speak." I take a seat across the room in the recliner and wait. Beasley stands up and starts pacing. He looks nervous. I have known him my whole life and I have never ever seen him nervous.

"I was the one who insisted that we keep the first letter from Beau a secret. It had nothing to do with thinking you couldn't handle it. I know you can. You have been dealt a shit hand; you have lost more in your twenty-five years than most have in a lifetime. Yet, you are still a strong, sweet, caring, and loving woman. I have seen people turn cold and bitter over a hell of a lot less." He is getting a little choked up. I have never seen him emotional. What the fuck is going on? He pulls the stool in front of my chair and sits on it and continues. "I didn't want anything to darken your mood and ruin your chance for the perfect wedding day you have always wanted and deserved. I promised your grandparents that if anything happened to them I would make sure you were taken care of, and I plan to keep that promise." He looks at me, letting everything sink in. I can understand that they all want me to be happy. That is one of the reasons why I love everyone in this room. They all care about me as much as I do them. I can't fault them for that.

"I want to see the other letter." I look at Beasley because I assume he is the ringleader. Everyone else seems to do what he says. He nods and pulls a folded piece of paper from his pocket. He hands it to me. I take a deep breath. I have to be strong. No puking after reading this one. I slowly open it up and begin reading it.

Once I’m finished, I fold it back up and hand it back to Beasley.

"What did he mean when he said he is the only one who can understand the pain I suffered when I lost my mother? I lost both parents, not just my mother. And what is this bond he is talking about?" I ask Beasley. He seems to have all of the answers. He looks at Kyle and nods toward me. Kyle stands and walks to the back of my chair. Why do I get the feeling I am really not going to like where this story is heading? Kyle places his hands on my shoulders and gives them a gentle reassuring squeeze.

"When Beau was about three his father, Kent, found out that his mother, Alice, cheated on him. During the affair that Alice had, she became pregnant with Beau, but for three years Kent thought Beau was his son. When he found out he wasn't … he went crazy. He ended up shooting Alice and then himself." He never takes his eyes off of me. That was a terrible thing to happen, but I still don’t understand what this has to do with me.

"How does that have anything to do with my parents dying in a car accident?" I ask. He looks down at his lap and then back to me again.

"Your parents didn't really die in a car accident, Amber. Your grandparents told you that because they didn't want you to grow up with the truth stigmatizing you everywhere you went. We were trying to protect you."

"We? How are you involved in all of this? And what the fuck really happened to my parents?" I scream. I know I am losing my cool. I am scared and confused. I feel betrayed by the people I love the most in this world. I think I have the right to be upset. I have been lied to my whole life. The only person telling me the truth is a fucking psychopath who wants to kill me. I look at Kyle.

"Wait … did you know about all of this?" I ask. I am not sure if I want to know. If he did know, I don't know if I could ever forgive him for keeping it from me. He moves in between Beasley and I and grabs my face.

"I swear to you, I knew nothing about any of this until now. The only thing I kept from you was the first letter," he says, desperate for me to believe him. And, I do. I can see it in his eyes. I nod. He sits on the arm of the chair and puts an arm around me. We both look to Beasley to continue. He takes a deep breath.

"Meredith, your mom, was a wonderful woman. And Charles was a good man, too. Charles was gone a lot on the fishing boats, and your mom started getting lonely. She met someone, fell in love with him, and had an affair. Thing is … she still loved Charles also. The other man walked away so that your mom didn't have to make the choice herself. Charles never found out. When you were two, you fell and split your head open. You needed a blood transfusion. When Charles went to give blood, they found out his didn't match." He stops and looks at me. Oh my God. My dad wasn't my dad. That means my grandparents weren't my grandparents … by blood anyway. Who the hell was my father then? I look up at Beasley, and just like that, it hit me.

"You're my father, aren't you?" I ask in almost a whisper. I am not sure how I feel about it all. On one hand, I still have some family who are alive. I have always loved Beasley, and so did my grandparents, even though they knew the truth. On the other hand, my mother is a cheater. And Charles, my so-called father, what did he end up doing?

"Yes, Amber. I am your father. I have known since you were two, along with your grandparents. But, what I am about to tell you next is the reason we never said anything. We didn't want to bring you any more pain or make you think somehow you were to blame for what happened to your mom and Charles. After the hospital told your mom and Charles about the blood test not matching, she told him everything. He left to come find me, but your mom tried to stop him. She jumped in his truck with him, and he got so angry that she was trying to stop him, he reached in the glove box, pulled out his gun, and shot her and then himself. Your mom lived for a couple hours, but her injuries were too severe. There was nothing they could do. Your grandparents didn't want you to be traumatized by all of this, so they asked me to keep the fact that I was your father to myself until I felt you were old enough to handle it. I was just glad they allowed me to be a part of your life as you grew up. They were wonderful people. Your grandfather was my best friend." He stands up and walks to the kitchen. I assume it is because he didn't want any of us to see him cry. I am numb. I don't know what to say to anyone. I have no idea how I feel. I want to cry. I want to break something. I need to process all of this.

"Why don't you go up and take a nice hot bath. I will see everyone out and be up in a little while."

I disappear before I have to see Beasley again.

I
WATCHED
Amber haul ass up the stairs. My poor girl. I have to say, she handled this a hell of a lot better than I would have. If I didn't know Beasley so well I would've thought he was full of shit. That story is like something you would watch on some made for TV movie. Not something that happens in real life. I need to figure out the best way to get her through this and to make our wedding perfect for her.

Paul and Holly come out of the living room, heading to the front door.

"Hey, is she okay?" Paul asks as Holly looks over at Beasley like she wants to give him a big hug.

"I think she will be. That's a lot of shit to process all at once. Can you check with the security guys when you leave and make sure they have people all around the house tonight? He keeps getting too damn close."

"You got it. Call if there's anything else you need. Anytime, day or night," he says and pulls me in for a hug. I don't know what I would do without him. He has been there for me through a lot of shit.

"Paul and I will take care of the bar in the morning. Stay with Amber if she needs you. We can handle the bar as long as we need to." Holly kisses my cheek. "Tell her to call me if she needs me for anything."

"You guys are awesome. Thank you for everything. What would we do without the two of you?" I say to them both. In true Holly fashion, she has a comeback.

"Oh, you couldn't do anything without the two of us. And yes, we are awesome, that's why you love us." She smiles at me knowing it will make me smile. Then, they head out the door. Now I have to go and talk to Beasley. This is not going to be easy. I feel torn. It must have been hard all these years for Beasley to know Amber was his daughter and not tell her. At the same time, though, Amber has been an adult for a while now, and she should have been told. When I walk into the kitchen, Beasley quickly turns around. As soon as he sees it is only me, a sad expression comes across his face. He must have been hoping it would be Amber.

"She needs a little time to let all of this sink in. That was a huge amount of stuff to hear all at once," I tell him as I reach for the bottle of whiskey and two shot glasses. I sit next to him on a stool and pour each of us a shot. "To our girl," I say as I lift my glass to his. We both down the shots, and I pour two more.

"I really didn't want anything to ruin her wedding day. That is the only reason I wanted to wait to tell her. I never wanted to keep it a secret after Charles and Meredith died. Gene and Ima were such good people, and I thought they knew better than I did. I just hope someday Amber can forgive me," he says sadly as he drinks the second shot.

"You know the type of person she is just as well as I do. Once the shock wears off and she realizes you were all acting out of love, she will understand. Her ability to forgive and her big heart are only some of the reasons I love her so much," I say with that goofy fucking grin I always get when I talk about Amber. Beasley noticed too, because he looks at me and chuckles.

"I stayed here after she left because I knew she would be back here."

"How could you know that?" I ask him. Hell, I didn't even know it. I had always hoped she would come back, but I hadn't been holding my breath.

"Because, just like her grandparents saw it, so did I. The two of you were destined to be together. I knew when you bought the bar that someday she'd be back." He smiles, stands up, and pats me on the shoulder. "Take care of her. Call me and let me know how she's doing will ya?" I nod as I follow him to the door. He turns and looks toward the stairs, hoping to see her before walking out the door, looking like he lost his best friend. I close the door behind him and lock it up.