For The Love Of The Doctor (BWWM Romance) (5 page)

Lulled by the breeze and cocooned in the surprisingly comfortable bedding, Violet found herself dozing off again, enjoying the luxury of sleeping in. She was woken up two hours later by the ringing of the phone, it was Jeremy.

CHAPTER TEN:

“Hey, you.”

“Hey, you,” she repeated, trying to keep her voice calm and nonchalant. She hated the feeling of relief that flooded through her at his call. She had been single for a while and it had been many years since she had dated or been with a man and a part of her had gone to bed terrified she wouldn’t hear from him anymore. Violet took in a deep breath and counted to five before answering his cheerful how are you.

“I’m good, you?”

“Couldn’t be better, sleep well?”

“Yes, you?”

“Is it corny if I say I slept very very well? What are you doing?”

“Just lying in bed.”

“Our makeshift bed from last night?” His voice was low and intimate.

“Perhaps, yes.”

“I had an amazing time last night.”

“Me too, it was wonderful.”

“Sorry I left so early.”

“Don’t be, I know you have a demanding schedule.”

“Hmmmm…what are you wearing?”

The abruptness of the question threw Violet by surprise and she giggled at his silliness, “Is someone feeling naughty?”

“Just a little bit maybe…certain memories are making it very difficult to not feel naughty.”

“Oh is that so, and what kind of memories would those be?”

“The kind where a beautiful woman lays on a bed touching her dark, rosy nipples, writhing in pleasure.”

A mental image of herself spread out on Jeremy’s bed rubbing her own nipples filled Violet’s head. To her immense surprise, her nipples started to stiffen and a fluttery feeling settled into her stomach as she imagined Jeremy’s hands exploring the curves of her body. A sigh escaped her lips.

Jeremy’s voice was low and husky, “I wish I could be with you right now, Vy. I miss you already. I want to taste you again.”

“Me too, so much.” Feeling a little dirty, she impulsively added, “I’m so wet for you right now.”

He groaned, “Oh God, you’re making me hard.”

Feeling bolder and wishing to torment him some more she whispered, “I’m lying in bed naked and touching myself.”

“Stop! Stop! Please. I have to go see patients now, I can’t have naked images of you in my head.”

“You’re the one who started it,” she taunted him. “Admit defeat?”

“Yes, yes, defeat. I’m waving the white flag in defeat. But you can rest assured you’ll be paying for this torment later tonight.”

At the mention of seeing him later that day, the fluttery feeling in her stomach got stronger and she looked at the clock again, it was close to 8a.m. Later tonight seemed like a forever away.

“So I will see you later tonight? No double shifts at the hospital today?”

“No, not today. I’m working an earlier shift at the hospital today again so I shouldn’t be too late, I’ll bring dinner.”

“I don’t mind making dinner.”

“It’s your day off today, no? I want you to relax and enjoy your day with Tanya. I’ll give you a call when I’m done and know what time I’m coming.”

“Okay…” she hesitated a little before adding in a rushed whisper, “I can’t wait to see you tonight.”

She could feel Jeremy smiling on the other end, “I can’t wait to see you either.”

“Last night was wonderful,” she said repeating her earlier sentiment.

“Yes it was. Don’t be too naughty, okay?”

“I won’t have to if you hurry on over.”

“Don’t tempt me Vy…God I wish. But it will have to be tonight, inch by inch I’m going to have my revenge on you.”

She shivered at the delicious promise and hung up the phone, unconsciously counting down the minutes until he would call again. She was appalled at her behavior, but she couldn’t help it, Jeremy was rousing long dormant emotions within her again, making her feel things she thought she would never experience again. The feelings were both exciting and terrifying. Thankfully she didn’t have too long to analyze the various emotions because the phone rang again soon after, it was Debra letting her know she was going to be heading over with Tanya soon and to put on a fresh pot of coffee so they could dish.

CHAPTER ELEVEN:

Life with Violet in it was suddenly a beautiful thing. For Jeremy his personality seemed to have undergone a drastic change; even his mother remarked to him that he seemed more cheerful and happy. He lived for the days and hours when he got to see her, when he got to spend time with her and Tanya. As much as he loved his intimate dates with Violet where they talked, laughed and had a lot of sex, sometimes in very unsuitable places, he also made sure they spent a lot of time with Tanya going to the movies, picnics and even a trip to the zoo. People would see them walking down the street, a picture perfect family with the handsome doctor and a beautiful curvy woman and their angelic child. The more they did things together, the more they felt like a family. And Jeremy was shocked to discover how much he loved the notion of being a family.

Maybe settling down wasn’t such a bad idea. Maybe his mother had a point after all, he thought to himself as time went on. The idea of waking up next to Violet every morning and sharing his life with her and Tanya sounded like a wonderful dream. He imagined them going on family trips, swimming with dolphins or going on a safari. He imagined having children with Violet, little boys or girls running around a big front yard playing tag or kicking around a soccer ball. These were all pleasant visions and for the first time in his life, Jeremy began to appreciate the smaller things in life, he began to find pleasure in watching the sun rise or appreciate the smell in the air after a heavy rainfall. 

Even all his material possessions began to hold more meaning because they were things he could share with Violet and Tanya. Although he longed to buy them everything he could, Violet refused to accept anything from him and was very strict about him spending money on them. After multiple arguments, he stopped trying to buy them gifts out of respect to her because he knew Violet worried constantly about the differences in their social status.  It was a discussion they had gone over many times and no matter how much Jeremy tried to explain none of it mattered to him, he knew it mattered to her.

But they were blissfully happy nonetheless and things were starting to get serious between them when something earth shattering happened that popped Jeremy’s bubble of happiness. One of his patients who he thought was recovering well suddenly passed away due to a fatal reaction to the medication he was taking, and his distraught wife paid him a visit at his office the day after, angry and upset.

“It’s your fault he died!” she shrieked, lifting a finger she pointed at him accusingly, “Your fault! You gave him the wrong medication, he died because he trusted you. May you rot forever in hell!”

Jeremy tried to find the right words to calm her but his tongue felt heavy and his mouth dry. He had nothing to say. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw security heading their way. The few patients who had been sitting in the waiting room were openly staring at them, fascinated by the screaming woman and her accusations.

Security made a move to grab the woman but Jeremy shook his head, the last thing he wanted to do was humiliate the poor woman by having her escorted out. Heedless of the guards hovering nearby, the woman marched up to him and jabbed him furiously in the chest, “You're a killer!” she screamed. “You’re no doctor, you’re a killer and you’ll pay for this, mark my words but you’ll pay for this. I’m going to sue you for this!”

Ignoring Jeremy’s wishes, the guards made a move towards her, at once she whirled around and snapped at them, “Don’t you dare touch me with your filthy hands, I’m leaving.”

Spitting at Jeremy’s feet, she marched out with security in hot pursuit to ensure she didn’t inflict any more damage on her way out. Anna rushed over to Jeremy to see if he was alright but he walked past her unseeing and went into his office consumed with guilt. How could he have made such a mistake? How could he have been so careless as to prescribe a medicine which he should have known was life threatening to his patient? And the worst part was he couldn’t even remember prescribing that particular medicine and dosage for the patient. He combed his fingers through his hair, trying to remember what he had done and why.

Was he losing it? Jeremy had always prided himself on being a meticulous doctor, he had yet to lose a patient and although he knew it was inevitable and the day would come when he would lose one, he couldn’t believe it was over such a careless mistake! Mrs. Karim was right, he was no better than a killer. 

The persistent buzz of his vibrating cell phone broke through his clouded mind and for the first time since they had met, Jeremy felt no joy at seeing Violet’s name flashing on the caller ID. He picked up because he couldn’t willfully ignore her phone calls, but the call was brief, hearing her voice failed to cheer him up and when he hung up, he did it with a heavy heart. All his life he had sacrificed things to achieve his goals and be good at his job and now he would have to sacrifice love but he didn’t know how he would be able to.

CHAPTER TWELVE:

Two entire days went by with no word from Jeremy when Violet started to feel worried.

It was so unlike him to not even message. She called his cell phone but it went straight to voicemail. An hour later, she called his office directly and Lynn picked up the phone. But when she asked for Jeremy, she was told he was with patients and couldn’t talk right now but could she take a message? 

Before long it was late in the evening and Jeremy still hadn’t called her back. By now Violet was starting to feel annoyed and just a little angry. She went over their last few conversations and their date from a few nights ago trying to figure out if she had done something wrong or upsetting.

By the time the third day rolled around, Violet could no longer ignore the gnawing certainty that Jeremy was deliberately avoiding her for some reason. He had gone from checking in with her throughout the day and sending messages and emails to absolute silence. No matter how busy he was, she knew he would have at least sent her a brief message or shot off a quick email. If it hadn’t been for her conversation with his receptionist, Violet would have been extremely worried about him. What she couldn’t figure out was why he had dropped out of her life like this.

His attraction for her must have been all about the chase and since the goal had been accomplished, the challenge was gone. It was the only thing that made any sense, she thought bitterly. Typical man. Or he must have finally realized the differences in their classes.

The anger and bitterness were self-directed, she berated herself for being so foolish and for getting carried away with her emotions. She had allowed herself to fall in love with a man who she could never really be with.

It was a different kind of love than the one she had experienced with Alex. With Jeremy it was different. She was a woman who knew her mind, a strong woman who relied on no one else but herself. The same could be said for him as well. Two adults thrown together, drawn to each other, emotionally and sexually filling a void they didn’t think could ever be filled. He made her happy, he made her laugh. He had made her believe in dreams again. Could it truly all have been just a lie? Designed to get into her pants? But that made no sense to her, she thought of his handsome face and his hard, sculpted body, he wasn’t a man who needed to use tricks to get women to sleep with him.

As images of his muscular body filled her head, her mind wandered to the last time they had been together. The sexual chemistry and uncontrollable passion were undeniable. She felt sexually awakened in his presence, feeling things she had only read about in books and magazines. Never dreaming it could really be that way with someone in real life. 

And now he was gone from her life, as swiftly as he had come into it. Leaving her lonely and bereft. Never again, she vowed to herself. Never again will I allow my heart to be so unguarded. On the fourth day, he showed up at her house looking apologetic and tired. Relief filled her, he wasn’t going to break up with her after all. But she confronted him about his silence right away, “You were avoiding me, why?”

“I needed time to think.”

“About?”

“I can’t do this, Violet.”

A cold dreadful feeling washed through her body and wrapped itself around her heart. “What do you mean?”

“There’s a reason why I’ve been single for so long. At first I was so focused on school I didn’t have time for a relationship and then after Julia…” his voice trailed off.

Violet felt a violent stab of anger towards the faceless Julia who had cheated on her beloved Jeremy and broken his heart. “After Julia, I threw myself into my work and I loved it. I loved every single moment of it and I knew I was good at it.”

“You’re an amazing doctor, Jeremy, you cured Tanya,” she said softly.

He smiled briefly, “I can’t be in this relationship anymore.”

“I don’t understand what you’re trying to say.”

“I’m saying we can’t be together anymore, I have to break up with you.”

“But why?”

“It’s complicated.”

“But Jeremy, you’re not making any sense! Do you not love me anymore? Did you just never love me to begin with?”

“No! I do love you, but I just can’t be with you.”

Not telling her the real reason for their breakup was one of the hardest things he ever had to do. Seeing the trust fade away from her pain-stricken eyes hurt more than he could have imagined. But he couldn’t and wouldn’t be so selfish as to place such a heavy burden on her shoulders. He knew that his generous, big hearted Violet would feel Mr. Karim’s death keenly and she would take the blame for it and he wanted to protect her from it. He didn’t want her to feel doubt for even a second. Not when she had already suffered so much, he wanted Violet to laugh and dance through life, he didn’t want her to be unhappy. How could he tell her a patient’s wife was blaming him for her husband’s death and that she was going to sue him? He couldn’t bring Violet or Tanya into the mess that would soon become his life.

The more she insisted on knowing the truth, the more he hardened his heart, refusing to budge on his decision. Their argument kept going around in circles, both of them dreading the moment when they would say goodbye, maybe forever. 

“But there has to be more to this, Jeremy,” Violet repeated again, her voice was dry and filled with sadness, “Is there someone else?”

“No!” he exclaimed, unable to imagine a world in which he would leave her for someone else, “No, Vy, there’s nobody else. If I could, I would be with you but I just can’t. It’s not you, it’s me.” He finished lamely, not knowing how else to explain it because it was after all his problem, his issue, it had nothing to do with her.

A long stretch of silence followed his sentence and he felt her physically drawing away from him, he sensed her gathering her strength and pulling herself together. A few more minutes passed and then she finally looked up at him, her large eyes filled with despair and resignation. Her voice trembled and shook with both tears and rage, “I think it would be better if you left, Jeremy, you’ve made yourself perfectly clear. I have to go get Tanya from school now.”

Mutely he nodded, biting back the offer to get her himself. He longed to gather Violet in his arms and comfort her, she looked so lost and sad. Sitting in the large, threadbare armchair, she looked small and vulnerable. He almost took a step back towards her but then he remembered Mrs. Karim’s angry face and he knew he couldn’t. Without saying another word he left.