For The Sake of Her Family (31 page)

‘But . . . but what you heard wasn’t anything to do with you. I’m so sorry I hurt you, but believe me, the baby couldn’t be born. Every time I saw it I’d have been
reminded of the shame of that night . . .’ Alice’s eyes filled up with tears. Had he really thought she was capable of destroying a baby she could have loved? As it was, the father
would never have loved it, and she doubted that she could bring herself to love a baby if she couldn’t even look at it without being reminded of the humiliation and hurt of being raped.

Jack reined in the horses. ‘What do you mean, “the shame of that night”? What happened, Alice? I thought you’d just been carrying on behind my back, like a bloody floozy.
What happened? Tell me!’ His face was red with anger as he looked at her tearful face.

‘You don’t understand,’ Alice sobbed.

‘Too right I don’t bloody understand. I don’t understand how a grand farm lass can turn into a common hussy!’ Jack glared at her.

‘I was raped, Jack! I was raped by Uriah Woodhead while his wife went to see her mother. Now do you understand?’ Burying her head in her hands, Alice sobbed uncontrollably. She had
been carrying her secret for so long, it was a relief to get it off her chest.

Jack jumped down from the trap, steadied the horses and went to help her alight. ‘Oh, lass, I didn’t know. I’ll kill that bloody Uriah! He’s always had a wandering eye,
the dirty old bastard. It’s the last bloody time he’ll get my trade. I’ll swing for him, so help me God. Why didn’t you tell me earlier?’

Alice stammered: ‘Because I didn’t want anyone to know. I felt so dirty, so vulnerable – and who’d take my word against his?’ She sobbed into Jack’s
jacket.

‘Everybody would have listened to you! He’d done it before, with a lass from Gawthrope. He’s a mucky old bugger when he’s had a drink or two, and Annie does nothing about
it except cover for him. She daren’t do anything else.’ Jack held her tight and gave a mirthless laugh. ‘Like, I knew it wasn’t mine, seeing you wouldn’t let me get
that far, but raped – I never dreamed that. The bastard!’ He hugged Alice tighter still. He still loved her; if anything, he loved her more than ever now he knew she’d been
faithful to him.

Alice held him close, loving the feel of the tweed material of his jacket on her skin and the security of his arms around her. She had even missed the smell of the carbolic soap that his mother
washed his shirts in. He was all she had left of her old world and she was so glad that he was there. She held him tight while the cold November winds blew around them, glad to have him back as a
friend.

‘Now, Miss Bentham, how can I help you? Does this have something to do with your late brother?’

The solicitor’s offices were dark, the green velvet curtains blocking most of the faint November light, and the air was filled with the smell of musty papers and books. Alice was nervous;
she had never dealt with someone in authority before.

‘Yes, that’s right, sir – my brother, Will Bentham, and his brother-in-law, Lord Gerald Frankland.’

‘I see. Well, carry on, Miss Bentham.’ He looked at her over the top of his spectacles, eyes burning through to the bone, judging her character.

‘My brother, as you know, was the beneficiary of his wife’s allowance, set up by her brother, Lord Frankland. Since my brother’s death we have not been receiving any payment
because it has been withdrawn, yet I’m sure that Lord Frankland would want it to continue, especially as he is now uncle to a baby girl.’

‘I see . . . Please give my congratulations to, er . . . Nancy? Is that correct? I see your brother was put in charge of the allowance because Nancy is not able at the moment to look after
her own affairs. Is that still the case?’ He flicked over page after page of documentation with his bony fingers.

‘Yes, that’s correct.’ Alice felt as though she was being cross-examined in court.

‘And am I also correct in thinking at this moment in time you are looking after her and the infant’s welfare?’ Once again he peered at Alice over the top of his spectacles.

‘Yes, I am.’

‘Would you give me a moment to read these notes? There may be something in here that will help with your request. I see that Lord Frankland does mention you in his instructions, so please
bear with me for a moment, Miss Bentham. Unfortunately this war is making extra work and I’ve had no time to acquaint myself with these documents.’

He studied the folder while Alice surveyed the dreary office with its stacks of files and documents.

Eventually the solicitor looked up from the papers in front of him. ‘Well, Miss Bentham, you are indeed mentioned – I have here a note in Lord Frankland’s own hand assuring me
of your good character and your dedication to his sister’s interests. He has made provision that, in the event of his or your brother’s death, Miss Nancy’s monthly allowance
should be issued to your good self. Thankfully, we have had no notice of Lord Frankland’s death. Rather than wait for communication from his lordship, I think we can act on his behalf –
after all, he has quite enough to be getting on with, fighting for dear old England.’

He signed a note to that effect and passed it to Alice, who took it gladly with shaking hands.

‘Give this to my secretary downstairs and she will see to it that the allowance is paid to you. You may also be interested to learn that Lord Frankland states that, in the event of your
brother’s death, Miss Nancy, her baby and your good self are welcome to live in Whernside Manor. He must value your services highly, Miss Bentham.’

Conscious once more of coming under scrutiny from those penetrating eyes, Alice got to her feet. ‘Thank you, sir. Thank you for your help. You don’t know what a relief this
is.’ She couldn’t believe it – they could live at the manor! She could have her old room back, and Mrs Dowbiggin and Faulks would be able to help with Nancy and the baby.

‘Thank you, Miss Bentham. Regards to your sister-in-law and her child.’ The solicitor busied himself with his paperwork, not even opening the door to show her out. After she had left
his office, he sat back in his captain’s chair and stared at the door. A young slip of a thing – working class, too, from the sound of her – and he’d just handed her the
keys to the best house in Dent, and a good monthly allowance to boot. Some people had all the luck.

‘Well, how did you get on?’ Jack was waiting outside the solicitor’s when Alice emerged.

Alice grinned. ‘Let’s just say I can afford to buy you a cup of tea and a cream cake at Simpson’s café, if you wish, kind sir?’ She gave a playful curtsy, happy
with her good fortune.

‘Too right, lass – I’m blinking frozen. I’ll not say no to a warm-up, and then we’d best get back. Looks like rain’s going to set in and it’s nothing of
a job sitting sodden on this buckboard for twelve miles.’

‘Right, take my arm if you wish, kind gentleman.’ Alice linked arms with Jack and they walked across the road to the tea shop, giggling all the way.

‘I have missed you, you know that, Alice, and I do still love you.’ Jack leaned across the table where they were now seated and took her hand.

Alice blushed. ‘Jack, we are in company – don’t be silly.’

‘I don’t care if the whole world knows it. You’ve always been the one for me, ever since we were little. I’m sorry I weren’t there when you needed me most. You
promise me you’ll come to me if there’s anything you want.’ He squeezed her hand tightly.

‘I promise.’ Alice smiled. It was good to have him back in her life. ‘Come on, let’s go – it’ll be dark before we know it.’ She linked her arm through
his again as they left the shop, making their way to the horse and trap.

‘Who’s put that there? Who’s dared to put that there?’ Jack was visibly upset as he pulled a white feather from the tied-up reins. ‘I’m no
coward! I’d fight for my country if I really had to.’ He squashed the feather in his hand, disgusted at being branded a coward. He was doing his bit for the country by farming and
making sure local shops were supplied. He glanced around the marketplace but no one met his eyes.

‘Hush now, Jack, they don’t know what you do. Whoever left it obviously watched us go into the café and assumed the worst. Forget it.’ Alice pulled on his arm as the
crumpled feather was thrown down in the road. ‘Come on, it’s been a long day and I want to get home. Things were going so well; let’s not let a stupid feather spoil it.’

Jack spat in the street, then climbed onto the trap, pulling Alice up next to him. ‘Isn’t it enough I’ve lost my best friend, my boss is on the front fighting, and my father
has made me go back farming? Mind, I’m not about to be made into cannon fodder, so perhaps a white feather is right.’

He whipped the team into action and drove them hard out of Kendal and across the wild moorland up to the Dent road. He was silent all the way, never looking at Alice, who felt that a good day
had been ruined by a stupid, unthinking gesture by a total stranger. By the time they arrived at the manor it was pouring with rain and the grey clouds had come down the fellside, turning late
afternoon as dark as night.

‘You’d be best stopping the night here, if you can. You don’t want to take the baby out in this weather – it’ll catch its death. I’ll come and take you all
back up to Stone House in the morning.’ Jack barely glanced at Alice as she alighted from the trap.

Her clothes sodden, hair dripping down her face, Alice looked up at him. ‘Jack, please stop worrying about that blasted feather – it means nothing. You’re doing enough for the
country without having your brains blown out.’ She shook her wet hair out of her eyes and gave him a smile. ‘I’ll see you in the morning, and thanks again for taking me –
it’s been a good day.’

Alice watched Jack ride off, his hand waving to her as he turned the bend of the path and went out of sight. She stood leaning against one of the pillars of the grand porch for a while, just
watching the rain pelting down. So Jack still loved her! It was a good feeling to have. Trouble was, it didn’t feel good enough. There wasn’t that flutter that she got when she talked
to Gerald, but since he would never be hers, perhaps she had better set her cap at Jack. At least he was a safe option. Was he the right one? Oh, she just didn’t know! Her heart said one
thing and her head another. With a sigh she turned and went into the manor.

‘Aye, lass, you’re soaking! Let’s have them wet clothes off and get you into fresh ones. There’s one of your old dresses still upstairs in the blue bedroom.’ Mrs
Dowbiggin passed her a warm towel from out of the airing cupboard and escorted her upstairs.

Having tousled her hair dry and got out of her wet things, Alice felt much better. She put on the dress and pulled a woolly cardigan over it. ‘Where are Nancy and Baby Alice?’

‘Miss Nancy’s in her old room and the baby is asleep. Pretty as a picture, she is, the image of her mother.’

‘Thank you, Mrs Dowbiggin. Have they both been all right for you? Baby Alice can be a bit demanding and, well, you know how to cope with Nancy.’

‘Aye, well, I thought I knew how to cope with Nancy, but she’s terribly confused at the moment, doesn’t seem to want to settle to anything. I even read her a letter that we got
from Gerald, but she wouldn’t sit and listen.’ Mrs Dowbiggin picked up Alice’s discarded clothes. ‘I’ll put these on the airing rack. They’ll be dry by the
morning.’

‘You’ve got a letter from Gerald? We haven’t heard from him in weeks. Is he all right? Is he injured?’ Alice couldn’t ask the questions fast enough.

‘He’s fine – or rather, he’s tired, fed up of fighting and complaining of the food, but he sounds cheery enough. I’ll give you it to read later. I thought
you’d have received one from him. Although, I have to say I’m glad that you haven’t, just in case he mentioned Will dying and Nancy read it.’

‘It’s so difficult trying to keep it from her. I’ve been waiting and waiting for the right moment, but she’s so fragile. I dread to think what it will do to her.’
Alice sat down on the edge of the bed and sighed.

‘Aye, I’m sorry, pet. For someone so young, you haven’t half been through the mill. Come on, come down into the kitchen while all’s quiet and read Gerald’s letter.
I’ll make you a nice cup of tea before we serve dinner. It’ll be a novelty for me and Faulks looking after folk again. Since his lordship went to war, we haven’t been standing on
ceremony round here. The old devil and me have lived in the kitchen. I doubt things will ever be the same after this blasted war.’

Alice settled in a chair by the kitchen fire and began to read the letter. Before long her face was glowing red with the heat of the blazing fire and the passion that she felt as she hung on
every sentence of the precious letter. When she came to the line
Remember me to Alice and thank her for looking after Nancy – I really do appreciate her
, she stared at the letters on
the page so hard it seemed they would be engraved on her memory for ever. She prayed that he would stay, keep his head down and come home soon. If only he would return to her, she might pluck up
the courage to tell him how she felt. To hell with the consequences.

‘Marry me, Alice, please marry me. I’ve loved you since we were little. There will never be anyone else but you for me; I know that now,’ Jack pleaded with a
dumbfounded Alice over the kitchen table as she nursed the baby. Baby Alice gurgled contentedly, granting her permission.

‘Oh, Jack, how can you ask me to do that when you know what I’ve done? You know I’ll always love you, but as a friend. You deserve better than me.’ Alice blushed and
played with the baby’s rattle as if trying to draw attention away from her embarrassment.

‘You know I’m a man of few words. I wouldn’t be asking you if I wasn’t true with my feelings. I can provide for us well. You know I’ve bought your old home and,
after my father’s and mother’s day, I’ll have my home and all. I’m worth a bob or two, lass, if it’s brass you’re worrying about.’ Jack leaned over the
table and then sat back, rubbing his head with his cap in frustration.

‘It isn’t that.’

‘Then marry me. We are made for one another.’ Jack was not for giving in.