Forget Me Not (Escape Contemporary Romance) (19 page)

‘I’m so sorry, Jeff. I understand how hard this must be for you.’

‘I know you do.’

Claire put her hand to her mouth. She couldn’t get the words out. She worried for Jeff and didn’t want Sophie to have to go through this. Claire wanted their baby to be safe, to be able to scream its little life-filled lungs out.

Eventually, she asked, ‘How’s Sophie holding up?’

‘I don’t know if this makes sense but I
know
Sophie will pull through. She’s strong and determined, but our baby is so small and helpless…’

‘Hopefully, the baby will have some of Sophie’s strength.’

‘Maybe. Look, I have to go now, Claire. I’ll call you as soon as there’s any news.’

‘Give Sophie my love.’

Claire wasn’t sure if Jeff had heard her as he’d hung up the phone. She leaned back against the kitchen cupboards.

‘Things will turn out all right,’ she whispered. ‘Sophie and the baby will pull through. The doctors know what they’re doing. This baby will be born.’

That was what Claire told herself but it wasn’t what she felt.

She’d been so concerned with finding Stefan again, after all this time, that it had consumed her: all her energy, her time, her emotions, or so she’d thought. Claire wouldn’t have thought there was anything left inside of her to be so taken up by, but there was.

‘This is happening to Sophie,’ she said. ‘Not me.’

It would not happen again. A situation that hadn’t worked out for her and Stefan would for Sophie and Jeff. They were different people and this was a different baby, and it
would
turn out alright.

Claire had to stay positive. For Sophie. She deserved the best. Unfortunately, Claire knew the type of grief Sophie was going through, had felt the weight in her gut when she’d woken up in the morning, the tears that had pricked her eyes as whenever she let herself remember and feel.

And now, when she thought there was nothing left to lose, another little piece had been ripped from her heart.

Claire pressed down on the accelerator. A break in the traffic meant she was finally driving at the speed limit. The white Hyundai in the next lane had been going painfully slowly and was holding up traffic, but now began speed up until he was ahead of her. The drive probably didn’t want her to overtake.

Maintaining an even speed, Claire coasted past him, but the driver must have woken up again because he put his foot down. Parramatta Road was painful enough without having to deal with recalcitrant drivers but was the only main road between her mother’s house and the airport, so there was no avoiding it.

Claire was grateful it was the middle of the day and not peak hour, a small saving grace.

‘You didn’t have to go to all this trouble just for me, darling,’ June said.

‘I offered, remember.’ Claire kept her eyes on the road while she spoke. ‘Anyway, it makes me feel useful.’

‘But coming to get me and then backtracking to the airport will take you all afternoon.’

‘Don’t worry about it. I have the time, and I was at home anyway.’

After a short silence, Claire’s mother said, ‘I wouldn’t leave you if I didn’t have to.’

Turning her head, Claire offered her mother a quick smile. ‘I know.’

’When Sophie called, I was torn. You need me here in Sydney but Sophie needs me, too. I didn’t know what to do.’

‘You did the right thing.’

‘At first Sophie didn’t want us to tell you anything.’

Claire frowned. ‘Why is that?’

‘Sophie thought it might be better to wait until they had the results back,’ June said. ‘She told me to tell you not to worry.’

‘Just like you’re not worried.’

At the corner of her eye, Claire saw her mother shrug. ‘The doctors are doing everything they can.’

‘I wish I could go, too.’

She’d been torn. Under normal circumstances, she’d have dropped everything and hopped on the next plane like her mother, but Claire’s position was complicated. She felt like she was being pulled at both ends.

‘Sophie also insisted you should take care of yourself and your own needs first,’ June said. ‘She didn’t want you to rush to the other side of the country, not under the circumstances.’

‘I’m glad Sophie’s got it all sorted.’

‘She wouldn’t have said that if she hadn’t mean it. You’ve got your own problems.’ After a while, June asked. ‘How’s Stefan? I’m sorry, what with everything that’s been going on, I hadn’t even asked.’

Claire nodded. ‘Fine. He’s more than capable of spending an afternoon by himself.’

But not much longer than that. She still had to be there for Stefan, to answer his questions and help him get set up in his new life. But Claire couldn’t live with him, sleep with him, share her life with him. She absolutely couldn’t share her heart with him. Last night had been too much.

He had to leave and soon. She didn’t have the strength to deal with Stefan tonight. Tomorrow would have to do.

Later, Claire would tell her mother that she and Stefan had broken up. She wasn’t sure they
had
broken up. They would have to have been together for this to constitute a break-up. Yes, she’d tell her mother about it later, in a few days or maybe when June had returned, but not now. She’d feel too guilty, otherwise. ‘You’re a good person to help Stefan out like you have,’ her mother said. ‘He’s lucky to have you.’

‘Not so lucky to have lost his memory.’

‘I hope he recovers and takes some of the weight of the situation off your shoulders. Whatever happens, he’s got to recognise how much you’ve done for him.’

‘In situations like this, you do what you’ve got to do.’

Claire didn’t want her mother’s praise, not now, not when she was about to kick Stefan out of her apartment. She didn’t deserve it.

Things would’ve been so much easier if she didn’t love Stefan.

But she did.

She was greedy and desperate, and all those things he’d called her before they’d separated. And she would have to be stronger than him, harder and more resilient.

Claire let out a long sigh.

‘Darling, I know this is hard for you,’ her mother said. ‘You can only do so much.’

‘No, it’s just that darned Hyundai’s back again.’ Claire pointed to the car ahead. ‘The driver’s an idiot.’

A small lie but she didn’t want her mother to worry. There was no need for it.

The problem was that Claire did need her mother here She wanted her to stop by unexpectedly, to bring around lemon cakes and choc chip cookies, and to ask Stefan about his health and how he was feeling without being judgmental about their situation.

But Sophie needed her more, no question about it. Besides which, her mother was only as far away as the telephone and Claire was a perfectly capable, mature adult. She’d made her own decisions and did things on her own, just like she’d taken care of Stefan largely on her own.

Claire was no more on her own now than she had been last night or this morning.

So why did she feel so alone?

Chapter Eighteen

Another day, another dilemma.

Last night, Claire had continued to barely speak to him. Stefan had thought it best not to push her. She’d told him about Sophie—his heart went out to her sister—and had then retired to her bedroom, saying she had a headache.

Now here he was, shaking hands with Veronica Ford, the last person he thought he’d go to for help.

‘Take a seat,’ she said, sinking into a leather wing-back chair in the corner of her office. The split in her charcoal skirt rode higher as she sat, crossing one leg slowly over the other.

‘Sure.’ Stefan sat on an office chair opposite the small coffee table.

He’d already been to his old apartment, searching thoroughly for clues. To be honest, he didn’t even know what he was looking for, only that he’d know it when he found it, but had come up empty.

‘I’m trying to find out as much about my old self as I can,’ he said to Veronica. ‘And I figure work was a big part of that. You’re a senior partner here and we worked together. I was wondering if you could tell me what my working life was like when I was here.’

Lowering her eyelids, Veronica tilted her head and gazed at him intently. ‘What would you like to know?’

Stefan beat around the bush, asking a few questions about the cases he’d taken on and the team from the office. But he didn’t care about the work, couldn’t honestly didn’t care about the people he’d worked with. He didn’t know them.

Veronica struck him as the kind of woman who made it her business to find out what was going on. She’d know all the regular office gossip and have detailed information on anything other topics that interested her. Stefan had the feeling he’d probably been one of those subjects, which was why he had come.

‘I still haven’t had a single memory from that time come back to me,’ he said, changing the subject. ‘Not a flash or a twinge. Nothing that seemed even remotely familiar.’

‘You won’t be able to come back to work if you can’t remember the laws involved,’ Veronica said. ‘That’s a shame. You were an excellent lawyer and a great asset to the firm.’

‘Claire has been very patient,’ he added. ‘She has been taking very good care of me.’

‘I’m sure she has.’

‘But I can’t remember anything about our relationship, either. She seems so lovely and I can’t work out why we would ever have separated.’

Veronica leaned back into the chair. ‘That was nothing to do with me.’

‘I didn’t mean that. I wasn’t implying anything. I’m just trying to make sense of the situation. We were together for years and then somehow things went downhill. I can’t work it out.’

‘Why are you asking me?’

’Because I think you have your finger on the pulse. You know a lot about what’s going on around here and I think you can help me.’

Veronica appeared to consider his statement. ‘You never confided in me. You always played it cool, never giving anything away.’

He looked her in the eye. ‘What happened?’

Shrugging, she said, ‘You’re right. Your marriage didn’t break down overnight. It deteriorated over time—months, maybe even years. That’s usually the way these things go. But from where I was standing, I couldn’t that tell the relationship was faltering. You seemed like a happily married couple, and then one day I found out you’d moved out.’ Veronica’s eyes narrowed. ‘I can guarantee you, if I’d known for a minute that there was trouble in paradise, I’d have stepped in to offer you a hand.’

‘It’s a bit late for that now.’

She uncrossed her legs, stretching her hand out to rest it on one knee. ‘It’s never too late, honey. That’s what I told you when you came into the office and told me Claire was pregnant.’ Pouting, Veronica added, ‘You turned me down then, too.’

Claire. Pregnant?

Had they had a baby together and the child had died? Was that what had happened? God, what a horrible thing to think about, what a tragedy. There was certainly no child now, no sign of one at the apartment, but surely Claire would have told him if there had been one. She couldn’t have forgotten to tell him something that important.

A furrow formed in Veronica’s brow. ‘You were really cut up when you found out that she had miscarried.’

So, that was it. That was the detail he’d been searching for. They’d almost had a baby. Almost.

It was a huge omission on Claire’s part, and he wondered why she hadn’t mentioned it.

‘How do you know that?’ Stefan asked.

‘Because you
didn’t
talk about it. A couple of people told you they were sorry, but you just brushed them off. You didn’t say a word about what had happened and you didn’t miss a day of work. You acted as if it were nothing. That was a dead giveaway.’

‘Are you sure?’

Veronica looked him in the eye. ‘Steve, honey, I might be a bitch but I’m not a lying bitch.’

He believed her on both accounts.

Still, she’d helped him more than she knew, certainly more than any friend would have. She didn’t seem to have many friends.

Stefan stood. ‘Thanks for seeing me.’

Veronica looked up at him through lowered lashes. ‘I’m flattered you came. You were right to choose to see me. I know you very well.’

‘I’m sure you do, but you don’t know what I’m going through at the moment. I feel like I’m starting my life from scratch while the rest of the world is racing on ahead.’

‘It’ll work itself out one way or another. Life always does for men like you.’

Stefan wasn’t sure if that was intended to be an insult. ‘Men like me?’

‘You were successful before and you’ll be successful again, whatever you choose to do.’

He looked away. ‘Yeah, I’ve heard that one before.’

‘In the meantime, you need to take some time for yourself, and work out what you want to do. If something makes you feel good, maybe you should just go with the flow, take things as they come.’ Smiling, Veronica added, ‘We can still have a bit of fun together.’

So, that was it. He should have guessed as much. She’d been helpful because there might have been something in it for her. ‘Sorry, Veronica, but I’m not interested.’

She shrugged. ‘It was worth a try.’

No, it hadn’t been, but in a way he felt sorry for Veronica. A woman chasing after any man that came her way must be desperate. She was pathetic, really. But his sympathy didn’t last long.

He had his own problems.

Stefan walked out, closing that door behind him.

He was striding out of the elevator and toward the exit when his cell phone rang. Looking at the screen, Stefan it was Claire’s mother returning his call. He walked over to a sofa in the corner of the foyer and sat, deciding that was as private a place as any to take the call.

‘June,’ he said. ‘Is there any word on Sophie yet?’

‘None, but she and the baby are both stable and the doctors say that’s the main thing.’

‘Did they give any indication of what happens next?’

‘Not really. Sophie might have to spend the next month in hospital or they might try to induce a birth, but they’re not sure if that’d put the baby under too much stress or not.’

‘I’m so sorry,’ he said.

‘Thank you, Stefan.’

‘I’m also sorry to bother you at a time like this. I know you’ve got a lot on your mind with Sophie, and with Claire, too, but I couldn’t see a way around it. There’s something I wanted to ask you. It’s personal.’