Forgiven (14 page)

“Well, don’t call my house acting so
informal. You and I are not best friends. So, you need to identify
yourself before asking me questions.”

“O-kay,” Diane said, taking a deep breath and
rolling her eyes. “Hello, Mattie, this is Diane. I was calling to
find out if my attorney contacted you about the preliminary hearing
next week?”

“Ain’t that what you pay him to do?”

“Of course, Mattie, but I forgot to ask him
if he’d been able to reach you. You know the Bible says that we
should be good stewards. So I’m just trying to handle my
business.”

“Don’t that Bible of yours also say treat
people how you want to be treated?”

“Yeah, it sure does,” Diane answered, happy
that she knew about at least two scriptures.

“Well, I don’t bother you, so don’t bother
me.”

Diane rolled her eyes. Why did she have to
deal with this old hateful woman? “Look, Mattie, can you just tell
me if my attorney contacted you or not?”

“If that’ll get you off my phone, then yeah,
he called. And I remembered every lie you asked me to tell, so you
don’t have to keep calling here. I told you before; I don’t like
you, and the less I speak to you the better.” Mattie hung the phone
up in Diane’s ear after saying those sweet words.

Shaking her head at the audacity of the mean
old woman she was forced to deal with, Diane put her cell phone
back in her purse. She didn’t have time to worry about crazy
Mattie, talking about she had asked her to lie. What lie? All she
asked Mattie to say was that Cassandra mistreated Lily and JT
ignored her. Diane couldn’t imagine Cassandra not mistreating a
child that had been forced on her due to her husband’s infidelity.
Mattie wanted to play games, and act like her child was too much of
an angel to mistreat a child. Hah… whatever. Mattie could believe
what she wanted, just as long as she said what Diane had told her
to say. She didn’t care and wouldn’t spend another second worrying
about Mattie Daniels. Her judge show would be on at two o’clock,
and if she rushed home, she would just make it in time to watch
that fine Judge Mathis bringing down the gavel.

Cassandra sat across from JT at the dinner
table glaring at him. JT had put the kids to bed and slept on the
couch the night before because Cassandra refused to come out of the
bedroom after their argument. He wished there was something he
could do to restore the joy she’d had this weekend. But she was
afraid again. He could see it plain as he knew his name, but he was
powerless to do anything about it.

“I talked to Lamont today,” JT said, trying
to draw Cassandra out.

Stabbing a few string beans with her fork,
Cassandra kept her face directed toward her plate as she asked,
“Did you ask him if you could borrow that money?”

“No. I already told you I wouldn’t do
that.”

“No, not to save your family from being drug
through the mud you won’t, but for your own selfish desires, like
buying a Bentley you would spend money that you owed a friend.”

“No, I wouldn’t. Not anymore. Look,
Cassandra, you asked me to not just be a man but to be God’s man.
You can’t have it both ways. I can’t take what doesn’t belong to me
to get me out of a fix I put my own self into in the first place.”
When she didn’t respond, he inhaled deeply and then changed the
subject. “Lamont is doing great. He almost has full use of his left
arm back. He thinks he might be able to move down here in about two
weeks.”

“That soon?”

“Yeah, he’s ready to get away from his old
surroundings and start fresh in a new city.”

She cut a piece of her meatloaf with her fork
and then told JT, “This might not be the place for him, because the
past has sure caught up to us. Maybe the same thing will happen to
him if he moves in with us.”

JT put down his fork. Cassandra’s attitude
had made him lose his appetite. And for a man used to shoveling his
food in his mouth like he was trying to make the world record for
eating the fastest; that was an accomplishment on Cassandra’s part.
“Will you please look at me?”

“What for, JT? What am I going to see that I
haven’t already?”

JT stood up, he grabbed Cassandra’s arm and
walked her into the living room. His children were napping in the
family room, but he didn’t want to run the risk of waking them up
if he and Cassandra started arguing in the kitchen. They stood in
front of each other, between the couch and love seat; Cassandra’s
eyes were averted. She looked first at JT’s chest, then at the
walls.

“I am not the enemy, Cassandra. And I promise
you that I’m going to do everything I can to keep this lawsuit from
affecting our family.”

She was non-responsive as she continued
staring off. If she had been lying down, JT would have called 911
so the paramedics could help him bring his wife back to life. But
he didn’t need paramedics, he needed Jesus. JT put Cassandra’s hand
in his and asked, “Would you pray with me?”

That got her attention. But only a little.
She said, “Whatever.”

They sat on the couch together, still holding
hands as JT called on the Lord to help them through this situation.
He began by thanking the Lord for his family and telling Him how
grateful he was that he’d been blessed so by God. He then called
each child’s name out to God and prayed a special blessing for each
of them and then he prayed for Cassandra. “Lord, I know that things
have not always been easy for Cassandra. She’s had to deal with a
lot of things that no one should have to deal with; like
discovering that her mom and dad had lied to her for so many years.
Cassandra has lost a child and then she had to deal with a cheating
and neglectful husband. I will never be able to mend her heart from
all that has happened, but Father, I do believe that You are the
mender of broken hearts. So, I ask You to walk with Cassandra
through this difficult time. Open her eyes so that she can see me
clearly, and know that with as much as is in my power, I will never
break her heart again. Thank you Jesus.”

“Amen,” Cassandra said and then pulled her
hands out of JT’s.

He opened his eyes and looked at his wife.
She appeared to have softened some. She had built that wall back up
overnight, but he and the Lord would knock it down. “I wasn’t
finished praying, honey. If you don’t mind, I wanted to pray for
Diane and Margie also.”

Cassandra stood and backed away from him.
“No. no, pray for them yourself. I don’t want to hear it.”

He reached for her, pulling her into his
arms. “I’m sorry, honey. I didn’t want to upset you.” They stood
there holding each other. Although JT did not say the words out
loud, he did silently pray that God would give him the strength to
ask Margie for forgiveness and that he would soon be able to
forgive Diane for the things she had done to him.

But forgiveness for Diane would prove to be
harder than JT expected. The doorbell rang as he and Cassandra
moved apart. When he opened the door, a white man he didn’t
recognize stood in front of him, looking like a bill collector.

“Jerome Tyler Thomas?” the man asked.

“That’s me. Can I help you?” Jerome
replied.

The man lifted the envelope he’d had in his
hand. He handed it to JT and said, “You’ve been served.”

“I’ve been served what?” JT asked as the man
scurried off his porch.

Cassandra came up from behind him and closed
the front door as JT opened the envelope. “What’s that?”

He pulled the documents out of the envelope,
quickly scanned them and then told Cassandra, “Documents concerning
Diane and Margie’s case against me.”

“Didn’t they already send these documents to
the church? Why do they have to come around our house?”

“Don’t you get it, Cassandra? Diane wants to
punish me. And she’s going to use every weapon in her arsenal to
make sure we don’t get custody of Lily.”

“She already slept with you. Why does she
need to humiliate me by telling the world about all your dirty
deeds? And why does she want to take Lily from us? She didn’t even
want that baby.” Tears formed in her eyes and her voice elevated as
she said, “What’s next, JT? Will Children Services walk up in here
and take the rest of our kids too?”

“No, baby. Diane isn’t going to take Lily and
no one else is going to take Jerome or Aaron either.”

“I don’t believe you.” She looked at JT as if
examining him. She plopped down on the couch and said, “Maybe Diane
isn’t punishing you at all. Maybe God hasn’t forgiven you for all
your wrongdoing, and this is just His way of standing back and
allowing you to get everything that’s coming to you. And if I
continue to stay with you, then I’ll keep going through right along
with you.”

JT stood behind the couch. He wanted to bend
down and envelope Cassandra in his arms, but he figured she would
just reject him. So he simply told her, “You’re wrong, Sanni. God
has forgiven me for everything. I can feel it in my soul. When I
pray, God is listening. But it’s not God’s fault that I fooled
around with Diane, so I can’t blame Him for the things she’s doing
to us right now.”

Tears streamed down Cassandra’s face. “I’m
tired, JT. I can’t take anymore. I thought I could come back home,
but maybe I was wrong. Maybe I don’t belong here anymore.”

JT walked around the couch and sat down next
to his wife. Her head was bent, shoulders slumped as she sobbed. He
lifted her head, causing her to look at him as he said, “You belong
right here. You’ve always belonged with me.”

She pushed his hand away from her face.

“Trust me, Sanni. We’ll make it through
this.”

“Shut up, JT. Just get out of my face,” she
said as she shoved him.

“What do you want me to do, Sanni? Tell me
and I’ll do it.”

She wiped the tears from her face, stood up
and walked away without responding to him.

JT jumped up and followed her. He grabbed her
arm and tried to turn her back toward him. “Don’t do this, Sanni.
Be reasonable and stop running away from me.”

Cassandra swung around and hit her husband in
the face with her fist. “If you wanted a reasonable wife, you
should have been a faithful husband.”

“I am faithful,” JT protested as he held his
jaw.

Cassandra’s hands went to her hips. She had a
smirk on her face when she said, “You’re a day late and a dollar
short on that trick.”

“I’m sorry, Sanni. But we will get through
this; just have faith in me.”

She rolled her eyes and lifted her hands in
exasperation as she said, “Just go pray, JT. Pray that God gives me
the strength to forgive you, Margie and Diane before I go buy a
gun.”

Cassandra needed her mommy. But she had
thrown mommy out of her house because of the way she talked about
JT. Today, she would give anything to sit on the couch with her mom
and listen as she ripped into her husband. But she knew her mother
all too well. Mattie would go way too far, saying things against JT
that Cassandra knew weren’t true, and then she would end up
defending him. She didn’t want to defend JT, so she was going to
stay away from her mother for at least another week. Then she would
call and let the boys talk to her.

Right now, she was sitting in Dr. Clarkson’s
office, waiting on him to tell her that she was being ridiculous
and that she should go home and help her husband through this
difficult time. But he didn’t do that. Dr. Clarkson got up from his
comfortable listening chair, which was positioned next to the couch
his clients sat or laid on. He sat down behind his desk, opened his
desk drawer and pulled out a business card. He walked back over to
Cassandra and said, “I think you should contact Dr. Sandra
Neumann.”

Cassandra looked at the card Dr. Clarkson
handed her with confusion in her eyes. “I was just telling you that
I’m thinking about leaving my husband. What does this woman have to
do with my decision?”

“I want to be honest with you, Cassandra. You
came to me for help, but I have come to care for you a great
deal.”

“Whoa, wait a minute. Hold on,” Cassandra
said as she held up her hands, trying to halt this
conversation.

“It’s the truth, Cassandra. I realized when I
met you for lunch and held your hand that I wasn’t handling our
relationship professionally. Even now, I want to encourage you to
divorce your husband, because I’m hoping that I might have a chance
with you. And that’s not professional and it’s not right.”

“I don’t understand.” Cassandra was totally
caught off guard with this one. Yeah, JT had told her that Dr.
Clarkson had a thing for her, but she hadn’t believed that. She was
a mom after all. She wasn’t some diva who turned heads as she
walked down the street. But now that she thought about it, she’d
been surprised when JT, who looked more like a male model than a
pastor, had been attracted to her.

Dr. Clarkson pointed at the card in
Cassandra’s hand. “Dr. Neumann is a much better therapist than I
am, and she won’t have ulterior motives.”

Cassandra stood up. Anger was overtaking her
again. She was conflicted. She had come in Dr. Clarkson’s office
wanting to bash JT’s head in, but now she wished she had that iron
skillet she fried chicken in, so she could knock Dr. Clarkson
upside the head with it. “I’m your patient. I came to you for help.
You shouldn’t have ulterior motives either.”

He lowered his head and told her, “I know.
This has never happened to me before. I have always maintained a
professional relationship with all of my clients.” He raised his
head and looked into her eyes as he continued, “The bottom line is
this… I want to be with you. So, I’m leaving the ball in your
court. If you decide to divorce your husband and if you’d like a
friend; I’m here.”

Cassandra stared at this man seated before
her. This was the first time she’d bothered to notice him as a man
and not just her doctor. He was handsome – that is, if you
considered Boris Kodjoe handsome; and Cassandra did. She allowed
her mind to drift as she wondered about life after JT. Could she
have a happy life with Dr. Clarkson even though she’d failed in her
marriage to JT? Or would she just end up right back here, preparing
for another divorce?