Friends With Partial Benefits (18 page)

"Rob’s mother," Jillian said with a serious tone. They both shared a wide-eyed nod.

Rubbing his head, he closed his eyes. "What were we thinking?"

She shook her head at him, took another hit, and handed him the joint. They both slumped back in their chairs and could relax, since the weight of their mutual attraction had seemingly been lifted.

A few minutes later, after sitting together in complete silence, sharing the joint, Brian and Jillian looked at each other and smiled, mostly stoned but oddly coherent. He laughed out loud for no apparent reason.

She giggled. "What is it?"

"The other night when your ex called, and you were so upset, and—"

She gave him a hand signal that told him to get to the point.

"Do you remember exactly everything that happened that night?"

"I think so."

"You were really kind of out of it. You took that sleeping pill, then George had you so worked up that you had a glass of wine, and..."

"I wasn’t that bad."

"Not bad... Do you remember how you got upstairs? We were talking out by the pool, remember?"

"I walked up. I think," she said with more bravado than confidence.

"I carried you up. You were going to sleep out by the pool."

"I was?"

"When we got upstairs," Brian started, and Jillian leaned in a little closer to him, thinking that maybe they had done something serious, of which she had no recollection. "You told me about that first morning when you came into my room, and I was asleep."

Embarrassed, Jillian covered her head with her hands. "I thought I only dreamt that I told you that."

He looked at her, on the verge of laughter, "You told me everything about it. How you saw it. How you uncovered it to see more of it. Exactly what state you saw it in. How you had Victoria on the phone and described it. Basically, how you fifth-degree sexually assaulted me."

"And you don’t hate me?"

"No, I think it’s hilarious. You told me how it had been so long since you had seen one and even longer since you’d seen a real one and on and on. You were very flattering about it. It was nice to hear."

"Is that all of it?" She made a face, dreading his response.

"Not quite." He held his hand out for her to pass him the joint. After taking a hit, he handed it back to her. "You—"

"Wait." She took her own long hit and held it ready for another possible emergency one.

He began again, "You... said that in order to make us... 'even-steven'— that was the totally hip term that you used—you needed to show me yours. Not only yours, but your newly-trimmed yours."

She looked at him, horrified. "I did?"

Lifting his eyebrows, he stated, "Nice work. You really did a great job with it."

She exhaled deeply. "So, we didn’t do it after that, did we?"

"You passed out; I covered you up, and that was the end of the story," Brian said, pride mixed with a little disappointment in his voice.

She took a long look at him, "Apparently, Ambien and wine do not mix."

He raised his eyebrows in agreement. "I kind of like the effect it has on you, though."

"Look, even after going through all that, we’ve been just friends. I think we've exercised perfect self-control in a semi-inappropriate way." Jillian then gave him an odd look that said maybe that came out wrong.

"So, friends it is." Brian gave her a big, over-the-top, high-off-his-ass nod.

"But we’re, like, friends with... not benefits, but something else..." Jillian said as she searched her mind for the right word.

"Like friends with...
partial
benefits."

She smiled. "Yes,
partial benefits
. I like it."

They paused, grinning at each other for a moment.

Suddenly confused, she narrowed her eyes. "It sounds good, but what exactly is it?"

"We need to figure it out... I think we just need to set up some ground rules first."

"Good idea—Rules?"

They each took a moment to ponder this, and then his eyes got big. "How about no touching?"

She curled her lip. "That’s a little too broad. I mean, what if I want to touch your arm? How about no touching... genitalia?"

He nodded with a big smile. "I like it. And if I’m not mistaken, we haven’t violated that one yet." He flashed a wicked smile at Jillian. "At least, I know
I
haven’t."

"Neither have I. I only looked," she replied quickly. "So, good. It’s settled, then. Rule Number One is no touching of each other’s genitalia."

He pondered this a second and then took another hit off the joint. "Breasts aren’t really considered genitalia, are they?"

He handed her the joint, and she took a deep hit. "Right. No, they aren’t. Is that a problem?"

"Well, you probably don’t want me to just grab your tits, or anything. That could jeopardize the whole F.W.P.B. relationship."

"F.W... what?" She narrowed her eyes, perplexed.

"Friends with Partial... F.W.P.B," he said with a rolling hand motion as her face lit up with recognition.

Her eyes opened wide. "And what about your ass?"

"What about my ass?" Brian asked, eagerly.

"It would probably violate," she motioned to him with her hand, "as you say, the whole F.W.P.B. thing, if I touched your ass."

"Football players pat each other’s asses."

She tried to process this. "So the ass is okay, but the ass…" she paused for emphasis with her finger moving from one imaginary word in front of her to the other, "…
hole
... is not."

"Exactly. You just can’t go around touching someone there."

"Unless, of course, you're having sex with him... or her."

"And sex is certainly against the rules here." After Jillian gave him a big nod, Brian added, "And that would knock your ass... hole out of contention also."

"Clearly."

"So no touching of genitals, breasts, or ass... holes," he said proudly.

"I think we can put Rule Number One to bed."

They both sat back, thinking for a moment. After brushing the hair from her face, she sat up in her chair and turned to him. "No telling anyone about F.W.P.B. People are so judgmental, and they wouldn’t understand it."

He met her gaze. "Just like
Fight Club
."

She looked blankly at him.

"The first rule of fight club is don’t tell anyone about fight club... Brad Pitt."

"Right, right, right." She nodded.

"So, that’s two." After taking a hit, she passed the joint to him.

"Okay, how about number three is no... kissing."

"Just no... mouth kissing." She smiled at her contribution. "A cheek kiss is probably safe."

"Definitely." Brian narrowed his eyes as if they had missed something obvious. "No mouth kissing or kissing any of the aforementioned areas in Rule Number One."

"Why don’t we just amend the first rule to be no touching or kissing of the mouth or any of those things defined in Rule Number One?" Jillian said, half proud of herself and half struggling with her logic.

He pursed his lips, trying to follow her reasoning. Then it came to him. "Two reasons. One: then it would be no touching of the mouth, and that doesn’t seem to be a problem; plus, having three rules makes it seem like we really, really did our homework here."

She thought a moment. "Agreed."

"So, we have our rules?"

"We have ‘em."

Brian stood and looked over the balcony at the pool. Jillian joined him, and there they remained for a few moments in silence.

He turned to her. "So, what the hell can we do?"

"Good question," she replied as they both tilted their heads skyward without any freaking idea what they could possibly do, given the semi-brilliant, yet somewhat restrictive, rules. She slipped her hair behind her ear, and then it hit her. "I’ve lived here ten years, and I’ve never once gone skinny dipping."

"I’ve never either." He pondered this for a moment. "I don’t think that violates any of the rules. It’s really a perfect F.W.P.B. activity, because you really shouldn’t swim alone."

"Swimming alone
is
dangerous."

Brian scoffed. "Let’s say you don’t have a significant other, just like the two of..." He pointed back and forth between them, making eyes at her. "Then who else could you possibly skinny dip with?"

"You just wouldn’t be able to do it." After holding her head high, proud of their accomplishment, her expression suddenly became serious. "But what if Rob comes home?"

"He’s staying at Laura’s all night." He gave her a big goofy smile.

Grinning at him, she pulled her shirt over her head, and tossed it on the chair. She shimmied out of her skirt and stood in front of him wearing another heart-stopping, matching bra-and-panty set.

"Do you have any more of that pot?" Brian asked.

"I do. I’ll get it and meet you in the pool."

He sat in the chair and struggled to quickly remove his shoes. Jillian unhooked her bra as she headed into the bedroom. Once his shoes were off, he stepped into the room and pulled off his shirt. He spotted her coming out of the bathroom bare ass naked and holding another joint in her hand with her mouth wide open as if to say
"
Look what I found
."
Smiling, she rushed out the door and into the hall.

Brian sprang into action. He attempted to remove his shorts while on the run, got caught up, and fell to the carpet next to the bed. He flipped over, hurriedly pulled off all his remaining clothes, and started after her. Before he made it through the bedroom door, he heard her splash into the pool.

When Brian reached the pool, Jillian was floating on her back with the moonlight shining on her beautiful breasts. He stood, nude, watching her from the edge of the pool for a moment, and then dove in and swam under the water across the pool. When he came back to the surface of the water, he found her by the pool’s edge, lighting the new joint. She looked at him. "I think I’m really f’ing high, but I feel like I’m thinking so incredibly clearly right now."

He nodded. "I know exactly what you mean. This must be some special, new, clear-thinking blend of marijuana."

"I think you’re right." She set the joint down on the patio and swam to the center of the pool to join him.

Brian gave her a serious look. "I’m sure compliments are fine, aren’t they?"

Jillian shook her head enthusiastically.

"You have really freaking amazing breasts—like world-class, amazing tits. And your ass, I uh saw it just briefly as you ran by, but really the whole package... how are you not married, again? It makes absolutely no sense and, uh…" His words trailed off a little shyly at the end.

"You
are
thinking clearly." Jillian grinned. "I think you are an incredible young man, and any girl would be lucky to be with you. Natalie will realize that soon, I’m sure of it."

"Thanks." He smiled genuinely. "This partial benefits thing is great, because sometimes you just want to look at a really nice set of breasts. And you don’t want to go on the Internet."

"Too creepy," Jillian said.

"You don’t want to go to a strip club."

"Too sleazy."

He lifted his palms up and widened his eyes. "And you currently find yourself sans girlfriend."

Shaking her head sadly, she gazed at him. "Just plain sad."

"But with this situation, when the mood strikes, I could just say, 'Please, show me your breasts.' Not just any breasts; ones so beautiful that Picasso would have killed to paint them, by the way." Jillian nodded a thank you, and he continued, "And if I did ask, and you were in the mood, you would do it."

"Are you asking?"

"I am!"

Jillian swam over to the edge, grabbed the joint, took a hit, and then began to hoist herself from the pool, her gorgeous ass staring right at him for a few seconds. She stayed in that wonderful position as she kicked her feet and struggled to lift herself from the water. Breathlessly, he watched her.

Turning, she sat on the edge to face him and then held her breasts together for his pleasure.

"Nice." Brian swam over to her, grabbed the joint, and took a hit. He put it back down, moved directly in front of her, grabbed one of her feet, and began to massage it. "This is also within the rules."