Funhouse (20 page)

Jasper was now staring into space, chewing at his fingertips as he recalled his story.

“I was angry, so I told it that it was just a bird, and I was going to tell my mother. It said it would be a mistake, and they would prove it, and with that, it took off and I didn’t see it for a week.”

“
What happened after that?”

“
You know what happened.” He snapped.  “My mother was raped on her way home from work.”

The room fell silent. Ronson made more notes, and then looked at Jasper.

“You thought what happened to your mother was something to do with the crow?”

“
I knew it was – or at least I thought I did. See I saw it again, later that night as my mother was taking her fifth shower since the police let her home. I was in my usual spot in the kitchen, wondering if it could possibly be a coincidence, and I heard that buzzing in my head and knew it was out there.”

“
You saw it?”

“
No. It was dark, and all I could see through the glass was my own reflection.  I just knew it was out there, watching me from the dark. It was in my head, telling me it had proved its point and if I wanted to stay safe, I needed to keep what I knew about them to myself, and from that day forth do whatever they told me.”

“
And you agreed?”

“
I did.” Jasper sighed. “By then, I was too afraid not to. Things got pretty bad, pretty fast from then on. I was convinced that if I didn’t actually see it, nothing bad could happen to anyone close to me, so I holed up in my room. Painted the windows with black paint so I couldn’t see out, and just sat there in the dark. My mother and brothers were worried, but I couldn’t tell any of them what had happened. I was too afraid.”

“
How long did this go on for?”

“
Oh a few months. I couldn’t sleep, I barely ate. I just sat there in the dark, listening to that maddening buzz in my head as it told me things, things I had to do. I tried to be strong, Doc Ronson, I really, really did, but they were like poison, and it didn’t take much for them to break me. I was isolated and scared, and in the end, I did what they told me to do.”

“
Which brings us to the day when you killed your family.”

To hear it said out loud made Jasper's stomach roll, and he lowered his gaze, staring at his white hospital issue pants and pumps.

Apart from the persistent tapping of the rain on the glass, the room was silent.

“
I... I wish I could take it back. I really, really do.” He said, his voice barely a whisper. “I was ill, and whatever I thought I could hear, seemed real enough to me at the time to make me do what I did.”

“
Tell me about it Jasper. It will help if you get it out in the open.”

Jasper looked his doctor in the eye, searching for reassurance, and finding it.

“They… they told me my brothers were a part of it. That they knew all about the crows and what they did. They told me if I wanted things to go back to normal, I would have to kill them. By then of course, my brain was pretty much fried. Of course, you already know that, I have been here long enough to make that point obvious enough. As sick as it sounds now, the idea to kill my brothers seemed like the most reasonable idea in the world. Joe was only seven, and Mark was fourteen. I…”

Jasper swallowed hard, struggling to hold back his emotions.

“I took the carving knife and I….” He trailed off and reverted back to rubbing his thumb and forefinger together as he jigged his leg up and down.

“
I can see you’re getting upset, but we’re almost done.” Ronson said.  “Can you go on?”

“
I stabbed them.” Jasper blurted, losing the battle to keep his tears at bay. “I started and I just couldn’t stop. They were in my head, counting along as I did it. I stabbed Joe twenty three times and Mark fifty seven times. I… I have no excuse.”

“
Jasper, Don’t blame yourself. You were ill, suffering from acute schizophrenia. It really wasn’t your fault. I…”

“
My mother was an accident.” He blurted, flicking his eyes once again to the window. “She came home early from work, and I was there, covered in blood in the kitchen with my brothers dead bodies on the floor. She started to scream. I begged her to stop, but then that damn bird was in my head, telling me to shut her up… and I did... I did.”

Jasper lowered his head, weeping openly. Ronson made more notes. When he had finished, he set his pen down and looked across the desk.

“I know it was hard for you to tell me that.”

“
It’s the first time I have told it all to anyone.” Jasper said between great, ragged sobs.

“
When you came here, I have to admit, we didn’t expect you to recover so quickly.”

“
Almost five years is hardly quick.” He shot back, wiping his eyes with his shirt sleeve.

“
Compared to what could have been? Life in prison perhaps? I would consider this a good day, a day to celebrate you finally getting better.”

“
Does this mean you are letting me out?” Jasper asked, filled with a sudden surge of hope.

Ronson hesitated, and the pleasant smile faded. “Here’s the thing Jasper. I know how bright you are. I also know that you have taken to covering the windows of your room with a sheet during the day.”

“It’s to block out the sun I...”

Ronson held up a hand, and Jasper stopped speaking.

“I also noticed that since we started our conversation, you have been looking out of the window pretty much all the time. I think you still believe that the crows are out there. I still believe that despite our best efforts, you still hear them, and with that in mind, I’m afraid I can only recommend that you stay here indefinitely until such a time when you are fit to return to society.”

Jasper took the information in, staring at Ronson as his lip trembled slightly.

“You said I was progressing, you said I could go home…”

“
No I didn’t. I said it was looking promising, however this conversation has raised concerns enough so that I wouldn’t be comfortable with releasing you at this time.”

Ronson, you backstabbing motherfucker.

He glared at Ronson as the thought bounced around his head, and was surprised to see Ronson flinch.

“
There’s no need for that Jasper. I’m only trying to help.”

Jasper froze, the skin on his arms rippling with gooseflesh.

“I didn’t say anything.”

“
You didn’t have to.” Ronson said, staring at Jasper. He saw it then, the reason why Ronson always seemed so familiar.

He had the same stare as the crow.

“You’re one of them aren’t you?” Jasper whispered.

He gave Ronson time to deny it. To refute it. To call him ridiculous, none of which he did. Instead, he stared, his eyes
dark and somehow terrifying.

“
You’re sick Jasper. You need to stay here and let me help you.”

“
No!” Jasper blurted, and looked to the window.

The garden was filled with crows. They were standing motionless, staring into the office and watching proceedings unfold. Jasper recoiled, and threw himself out of his chair on to the floor.

“Get them away from me!” He screamed as he pushed his way across the carpet into the corner. Ronson should, by rights be hurrying around the table to help, but he simply sat, a knowing smile on his lips.

He was enjoying it.

“Doc Ronson, please, shut the blinds, they’re out there.” Jasper shrieked, staring at the army of birds on the lawn.

Ronson also looked at the garden full of birds, and shrugged. “They are just birds, Jasper. They can’t hurt you.”

“You are one of them, aren’t you doc?” Jasper cackled. He was hysterical now, and had pushed himself back against the bookcase by the locked office door.

“
Call em' off! I promise I won’t ever tell anyone about them. Please!”

Ronson only grinned, and pressed the intercom on his desk. “Nurse, get someone in here with a sedative, Mr. Collins is having an episode!” Jasper noted that he spoke with mock panic over the intercom, which was replaced by the oozing, cool calm when it was just the two of them.

And the lawn full of crows, of course.

“
What do you want from me?” Jasper sobbed as he tucked his knees up to his chin and hugged them tightly.

Ronson stood and approached Jasper. He was holding a silver letter opener.

“Are you going to kill me?” Jasper whispered as the incessant buzzing began to drone around his head.

Ronson crouched and leaned close enough for Jasper to smell the expensive aftershave that he wore.

“No. You’re going to stab me.” He said, and then thrust the letter opener into his own arm. He yelled out in pain, and in unison, the crows as one let out a high-pitched squawk and took off in a flurry of beating wings. It was then that the orderlies burst into the room to see Jasper rocking and staring out of the window and Ronson on his back, holding his bleeding arm and moaning. No words were shared as Jasper was sedated, even so, he could hear Ronson clearly enough in his head along with the buzzing as he lost consciousness.

Six months later.

The lobotomy had been successful. Although rarely performed anymore, in the case of Jasper Collins, it was seen as a necessary step. The procedure hadn’t gone as expected, however Jasper didn’t care. He was happy in his room. The window was small and high up on the wall so that he couldn’t see out of it. It was also dark, and moonlight spread across the wall, making a projection of the bars that covered the window. He sat in the corner, knees tucked under his chin, wiry arms hooked around them.  He was still the same on the inside, but he couldn’t outwardly articulate. He was a prisoner within a prisoner.

Ronson had pushed for the surgery, and although for a time he hadn’t known why, he thought he knew now. Of course, now it was too late, because although the thoughts were sharp in his mind, the procedure had meant that he couldn’t articulate them even if he wanted to. He heard a sound, and his heart rate increased. He cast his eyes to the window and saw it, the silhouette blown up to giant proportions on the wall. The crow walked back and forth at the window, and then stopped to look in at him. He met its gaze, and for a moment, the thick soup that had replaced his brain cleared. He heard a voice, Ronson's voice, clear and sharp. It said just seven words, but they were enough to confirm his suspicions. Jasper smiled, and closed his eyes, the fight long since having left him.

The silhouette on the wall took flight and he was again alone. He knew he would never be able to leave. Because the crows wouldn’t allow it. He thought of his brothers, his mother and his father during happier times when they were still alive, but his mind kept going back to those seven words uttered by the crow. He didn’t think he would hear from them again. He was sure that now that they were satisfied that he had been silenced. After all, wasn’t that the entire point?

Seven words.

Enough to make sense of the whole mess. Jasper covered his ears and rocked back and forth just a little harder as those words bounced around in his broken brain. It was his error, because he didn’t think that Ronson counted. After all, he was a doctor. How could he have known it was a test?

Either way, it was too late now. He had done it and he would have to live with it. He wondered if the crow’s presence meant that something bad was going to happen, or if it was just a final goodbye, a gloating show of victory.

Those seven words spun around his head.

You shouldn’t have told anyone about us.

And they were right, Jasper thought as he bit into his wrists, tearing through veins and sinewy flesh. He sat there, bloody mouthed and smiling as he bled out onto the padded white floor, which greedily soaked up the precious fluid. He was smiling. At last it was over. At last, there was silence.

T
om Johnson accelerated, pushing the S-Class Mercedes past sixty. It had been one of those days, the kind that start badly and just get worse, and now to top it all off, he had a headache.  As he maneuvered the vehicle around a slow moving campervan, he acknowledged that he might well have been fired instead of just given a verbal dressing down, and for that at least he could be grateful.

The car flashed past a road sign, and he shook his head.

Four miles to go
.

At least Gloria was asleep. On top of his already shitty day, she had given him hell when he had cancelled their plans. He had promised to take her to dinner, and then to an expensive hotel. To say that she was less than pleased to be driving out here into the middle of nowhere would be an understatement. Somehow, he had managed to convince her to come along with him, with the promise that as soon as he had done what he needed to do, he would make it up to her.