Give My Love to Rose (19 page)

Langley went into the water closet and once
the sound of running water reached her ears, Rose turned to
Marston. “We need to talk.”

Marston nodded as he slid his knife across
the sharpening stone. “About what?” he asked without looking at
her.

“
Those men who were here
today and your reaction to them.”

Marston’s head snapped up and his golden
eyes narrowed. “Did Langley tell you?”

“
No, he obeyed your
orders,” Rose snapped sharply. “And don’t do that again. Don’t tell
my son to keep secrets from me.”

“
I did that to protect
you,” Marston insisted.

Rose pulled the blanket tighter around her
shoulders and shook her head. “Langley and I have a close
relationship, Marston. He trusts me and I trust him. I don’t want
there to be any secrets.”

Marston sighed and laid his sharpening stone
on the table as he holstered his knife. “I’m sorry,” he finally
muttered. “I’m new to all this family business and I made a bad
decision.”

Rose’s eyes widened. “Family?”

Marston cleared his throat and removed his
gray hat. He tossed it on the table and stretched out his legs.
“Did I overstep by saying that?” he asked without meeting her
gaze.

Rose smiled. “No, you didn’t overstep. I
actually like the idea.”

Relief filled his eyes as he looked at her,
but then he frowned. “How did you know those men were here?”

Rose listened to the ticking of the clock
for several long moments before finally licking her lips and
staring into the fire. “I heard you talking to them, Marston. I
heard everything.”

Marston felt his heart tighten painfully.
His hands were shaking so he busied himself by grabbing a coin from
his pocket and tapping it on his thigh. “What exactly did you
hear?” he asked tightly.

“
All of it,” Rose
whispered. “It’s hard to imagine you doing those things,
Marston.”

Marston forced himself to meet her gaze. The
fear of her rejection was strong, but Marston Jacob’s was no
coward. “I did bad things, Rose. I told you as much. I’m a bad man,
Rose.”

“
You were,” she admitted.
“You’re not any longer.”

Marston was about to reply when the water
turned off in the washroom and Rose put her finger to her lips to
silence him. Marston watched her as she rose to her feet and he was
unable to keep his eyes from roaming over her soft full body. Rose
was the single greatest temptation Marston had ever been faced
with.

Marston offered Langley a small smile as the
boy stepped out of the washroom in a pair of faded red long johns.
“Goodnight Marston,” Langley said as he his hand over his damp red
hair.

“
Goodnight kid,” Marston
replied. “Oh and Langley?”

“
What?” Langley asked,
pausing in his bedroom door.

“
I was wrong earlier
today. You shouldn’t keep stuff from your mama. I never had a mama
so I didn’t know that rule, but it’s a good one.”

“
Yessir,” Langley agreed
with a nod before walking into his room. Rose gave Marston a
grateful smile before following the boy.

Marston sat there alone, staring into the
fire and rolling that coin between his fingers. Family. The idea
was foreign to him, but he liked the thought. The closest he’d ever
had to a real family had been Duke and Jeremiah and either one of
them would sacrifice the others to save themselves.

Marston had to wonder if he could do the
family thing or if he’d only end up letting Rose and Langley down.
He shoved his hand through his thick brown hair and stared up at
the rough planked ceiling. He wouldn’t let them down. He couldn’t
change what he’d done in the past or who he had been, but there
wasn’t anything stopping him from being something different
now.

He was still staring at the ceiling when
Rose returned several minutes later. She sat down on the sofa and
curled her legs beneath her. “Rose I….” Marston began, but Rose cut
him off by raising her hand when he turned his head to look at
her.

“
Let me talk, please,” she
whispered. Marston nodded. “I understand that the skinny man was
your brother?” Again Marston nodded. “Who was the other man to
you?”

“
He took me and my brother
in after we left the orphanage,” Marston replied.

Rose chewed the inside of her lip. “Are they
bad men?”

“
No worse than
me.”

Rose’s deep blue eyes narrowed as she
studied him. “I heard what was said, Marston. That older man said
you never enjoyed it as much as they did and I can see for myself
that you aren’t the man you were then any longer.”

Marston didn’t want her to be fooled by her
own hopes. “I’m still the same man, Rose, but I won’t do the same
things.”

“
I have faith in you,
Marston,” Rose whispered, taking Marston’s hand gently in her own.
“But do you believe you can change?”

Marston stared at her hand on his and
nodded. “Yes. With you and with Langley I can. I was honest with
you from day one about the man I was, Rose, but I would never do
anything to hurt you or that boy. As a matter of fact, I’d give my
life to keep you both safe. And for me, that’s saying
something.”

“
If you want me gone,
Rose, I’ll go. I shouldn’t have made myself at home here the way I
did. You’re too good a woman for a man like me…” he admitted, his
gaze dropping to the floor.

Rose moved as quickly as her weak body would
allow and went to him. She dropped to her knees beside his chair
and he growled. “Get up…. I don’t like the thought of you getting
dirty on the floor.”

Rose just smiled and laid her hand on his
cheek. She could see the pain and fear in his golden eyes and it
touched her heart that he would show her those emotions he
generally kept hidden.

“
Marston, I want you
here,” Rose vowed. Marston studied her eyes for any sign of doubt
but found none. Instead, what he saw there left him speechless.
Never had he been gazed upon by the loving eyes of a woman. “I know
that you have a past and that you’ve done bad things, but I also
know deep in my heart that you are not a bad man and you will never
hurt us. You left us one and it nearly did me in, but I never
stopped wanting you to come back. You just had to go out and find
whatever it was you were looking for.”

Marston swallowed hard. “I realized once I
was gone that I had left everything I wanted right here in this
cabin.”

Rose lowered her gaze to his chest and
removed her hand from his cheek. “I do have to ask one
question.”

Marston suddenly felt cold without the
contact of her skin against him. “What?”

“
Is your being here going
to place Langley in danger?” When Marston’s eyes narrowed, Rose was
quick to elaborate. “I mean from those men or others like
him?”

Marston shook his head. “Duke and Jeremiah
are no danger to you.”

“
You sure acted like they
were a danger when you were hitting and threatening to kill them
just a few hours ago.”

Marston sighed. “I was only proving a point,
that’s all,” he assured her. “And at first I wasn’t quite so sure
they weren’t a danger but after the talk we had, I’m sure they
don’t mean you any harm.”

“
What point were you
trying to prove exactly?” Rose asked.

Marston reached out and took a soft red curl
between his fingers, unable to stand the lack of physical contact
between them. “Duke seemed to think I’d gone soft and in our world
soft is a weakness and a death sentence. I was proving to him that
I wasn’t as gone as he thought I was.”

“
Do you hit all your
friends, Marston?”

“
Why?” Marston asked,
grinning at the sight of the dramatic frown on her face.

“
So I can be prepared to
duck.”

Marston laughed lightly and then scooped her
up from the floor and sat her down gently in his lap. Rose had
always been a larger woman but Marston was a giant of a man and
when he held her in his arms this way, she felt very close to
dainty.

“
You’re more than just a
friend,” Marston assured her, burying his nose in her soft red
curls and breathing her in.

Rose stiffened as memories of men before him
threatened to steal the pleasure she had had a glimpse of when
first wrapped in his arms. “Don’t be afraid of me, Rose,” Marston
pleaded softly.

Rose’s legs relaxed over the side of the
chair and she found her entire body sinking into him. This was
Marston. This was the man who had cared for her and for her son,
who had nursed her back to health when she’d been near death.

“
I’m not afraid of you,”
she vowed.

Marston smiled as he held her close. This
was so different from anything Marston had ever done with any other
woman—or person for that matter. This was tender and sweet. It was
safe and warm. Why the devil had he ever left Rose and Langley?

Silence fell over the room as the two of
them simply enjoyed the closeness and listened to the logs
crackling in the fire. “What led you to that life?” Rose finally
whispered.

Marston could think of a million things he
would rather talk about, but he knew he wouldn’t deny Rose anything
she wanted. “I grew up in an orphanage,” he replied. “My mama
dropped Jeremiah and I off there when I was too little to remember.
I have no memories of the woman but Jeremiah does and his memories
make me glad I don’t have any. They figure I was somewhere between
the age of one and three when she set me on that doorstep so I’m
somewhere around thirty now."

“
It’s still hard for me to
believe that you don’t know your birthday,” Rose admitted. “That’s
terrible.”

Marston chuckled. “Out of all the things
that have happened in my life, not knowing by birthday is the least
of the evils.”

He ran his fingertips down her arm and Rose
felt a delicious shiver run throughout her body. “It’s still
terrible,” she insisted, trying hard to push away the feelings he
stirred within her. Rose knew she wasn’t ready to take that step
with a man—not even Marston.

“
Well if it makes you feel
any better, Jeremiah seems to think I was born sometime in the
spring,” Marston stated. “Anyway, the orphanage was rough. The
headmaster was a cold-hearted bastard and he seemed to take
pleasure in beating us over the smallest of things. As I got older
I rebelled and that just led to the punishments getting worse.
Whips, knives, isolation, starvation—whatever means he thought
necessary to keep me in line and teach me a lesson.”

Rose shivered as she squeezed her eyes shut
and fought back the images or Marston receiving that kind of
treatment. She knew what those punishments felt like and Rose would
not wish them on anyone.

“
What about this?” Rose
asked, opening her eyes once more. She gently touched the circular
scar marring his cheek. “How did you get this?”

“
There was a boy. He was
younger than me and small and weak. He got sick and was real cold
so I gave him my blankets. The headmaster got angry and hit me—I
hit him back. The headmaster used my face as an ashtray and the boy
died.”

Rose snuggled closer to him, wishing she
could take away the pain of his past but knowing she couldn’t. “How
did you meet Duke?”

Marston took her hand in his and entwined
their fingers as he stared at the wall. “I was more man than boy
and was bigger and meaner than anyone else at the orphanage.
Jeremiah showed up one day, he’d been gone a while, and he had Duke
with him. They packed me up and took me out.”

“
So the orphanage taught
you to be cold and Duke…?”

“
Duke taught me that
caring about anyone else would only get you killed. He taught me to
live for myself and no one else. Being soft would end with you shot
and falling in love was for fools.”

Rose absently picked at the button on his
shirt. “Sometimes being a fool is awfully tempting…”

Marston smiled. “Yes, ma’am.” He kissed her
hair. “It is.”

They fell into silence once again and Rose
sighed. “I suppose that means it’s my turn now.”

“
Your turn for what?”
Marston asked, his voice heavy as if he’d been close to
sleep.

“
Don’t tell me you haven’t
wondered what a young woman was doing married to a man as old as
Langston.”

Marston shrugged and gave her hand a gentle
squeeze. “I wondered. I judged you pretty damn harsh for it at
first. But I know you better now and I know you must have had a
damn good reason.”

“
I did.” Rose nodded. “I
don’t.. I don’t think I can talk about it though.. I…”

Marston heard the fear rising in her voice
and he held her tighter. “You're safe now, Rose. Whatever happened
in your past will never happen again. Not with me here.”

Rose stared up at him, in awe of the man he
was. Marston grumbled. “Don’t look at me like that. It makes me
feel awkward enough when the boy does it.”

“
Sorry,” Rose replied with
a smile. She rested her head back against his heart. “I was in a
truly bad situation and would have died had Langston not come
along. He felt sorry for me and he took me away from there, but we
were never in love… He was simply a very good friend.”

“
I’m guessing Langston
Junior isn’t Langston’s blood?” Marston asked quietly, twisting a
loose thread from her dress around his finger.

“
No,” Rose whispered,
feeling that familiar blanket of shame. “Three weeks after Langston
rescued me, I realized I was with child. Do you know what that man
did when I told him?” Marston shook his head. “He married me! He
said the boy needed a father and he even went as far as to give
Langston his name. Just after Langley was born, the law came and
took Langston away from us.”