Good Sensations (24 page)

“Oh, um… I don’t know. I’ll definitely think about tha—”

“Mother, how many people do you have on your guest list?” Evan cuts me off, sounding irritated.

“I was just making an informal list in my head—”

“The number, Mother,” Evan gets short, his tone clipped with impatience.

“Five Hundred.”

“What!” I spit out, shocked and glad my mouth is empty or I would have spewed food or wine everywhere. My head is already shaking when I say, “I’m not having five hundred people at my wedding. Evan, I’m not. I, I, I can’t walk down the aisle in front of that many strangers and—”

“It’s okay, I’ll handle this,” he says, rubbing my thigh and reassuring me. He looks back at his mother sitting across the table from him. “That number is too high.”

“Four hundred,” Claire bargains.

“No.” Evan is firm.

Claire turns to Hugh who looks resigned to losing this battle. He shrugs and she rolls her eyes, finally caving in. “Fine. How many can we invite?”

Evan puts on his most winning smile then looks at me, redirecting the attention. “I’ll let my fiancée answer that.”

All eyes are on me. I look down at the cloth napkin I been twisting violently in my lap and mumble, “Ten.”

“What, dear? Speak up.” I look up to meet Claire’s hopeful eyes.

I repeat, “I was thinking more along the lines of ten, maybe fifteen guests for your side.”

“Ten?” She coughs, having a slight choking attack, which is odd since she hasn’t been eating. “I don’t comprehend… um, hmmm,” she stutters, then gulps the rest of her wine, emptying the glass. “Ten. That’s ridiculous.
Ten?
Only ten people? That’s impossible. Tell them, Hugh. Impossible.”

Evan leans forward and clarifies for her. “Ten. So,” he says, clasping his hands together to break the tension. “Mallory’s graduation is coming up and we’d like to personally invite you to Colorado.”

We all stare at him in a dead silence.

“Dinner with your parents went better than expected,” I say, relieved to be back in the guest house.

“How’d you expect it to go?” Evan asks, flopping down on the bed next to me.

“I don’t know. I’m still not sure what to expect from your family at this point.”

He rolls over and rests his head on my stomach. Running my fingers through his hair lazily, I smile, loving the calmness of moments like this with him. He laughs and my body reverberates from the movement.

“What’s so funny?” I ask.

“Just remembering when we told them we got engaged.”

“Ahhh, the good times of frazzled nerves and stumbling words. I was nervous, but you were a mess,” I tease him and tug on his earlobe.

“Nervous is an understatement.” He chuckles.

“It all worked out… eventually. “ I remember the relief I felt last December after Evan called them.

“Mother, Dad,” He says then clears his throat. “I want to talk to you about something important.” I press my ear against his hand, so I can hear the other side of the call.

“Evan, what is it?” his mother asks.

“I know a lot has changed this past year. Fuck, just in the last seven months—”

“Please don’t swear,” she admonishes. “It’s unbecoming.”

“Okay,” Evan stops, gulping heavily. I can tell he’s losing his train of thought, so I use my hands to wave, making signals and hoping it helps to keep him on track. “Oh! Yeah, so, I was saying that at times I can’t believe the changes either. My life is so different now and for the better. I think you can both agree with me here.”

“Well, son, I do agree,” his dad responds. “I think you’ve gone through a lot of bad and you seem to finally be getting some good back into your life.”

“Thanks, dad. I couldn’t agree with you more.”

“Honey, what is this about?” His mother is losing patience. “I need to leave for a meeting.”

“I want you to know that I’m taking a leap of faith. Well, not exactly a leap of faith. More like a leap of certainty,” he starts to explain, looking to me while nodding his head like he’s impressed with himself. “Yes, certainty. A leap of guaranteed happiness. A leap of… well, now that I think of it, maybe it’s not even a leap, but more like a jump?” He looks at me for reassurance.

I roll my eyes at my sweet man as he stumbles through this. After taking a deep breath, he announces, “Mallory and I are engaged. It happened officially last night.” I hold my breath and wait for the rapture.

Silence.

Silence.

Mallory gives me two thumbs up, and I hear a shuffling noise from the other end of the line. “Son, it’s Dad. Don’t you think this is too fast?”

“No. I love her,” Evan says, squeezing my hand. “Why put off what we know we want. I don’t want to waste time being away from her in order to make everyone else more comfortable with our decision.”

“Evan…” His mother sighs into the phone. “You’re just starting back to school. Your focus should be there. You seem to be making a lot of big decisions lately. Are you ready to have this dramatic of a change at this stage in your life?”

When Evan exhales I back away from the phone to look at him. I don’t want to be a burden on him. I never wanted that. He closes his eyes and a sadness takes over his expression. Quietly, he responds, “Yes.” That’s all. No further explanation.

Rubbing his back, I try to give him the comfort and support he needs. When he opens his eyes, a gentle smile appears, just for me. I remind him, “It’s okay, babe. We’re in this together.” I squeeze his hand to comfort him, like he did for me earlier.

“Maybe there’s not any more to say except for congratulations,” his mother says.

I watch as Evan’s smile grows. “Really? Do you mean that?”

“You weren’t asking us permission, were you?” Hugh says, “You’re old enough to know what you want.”

“I am and that’s being married to Mallory,” Evan replies, looking right into my eyes. “I love her.”

“I think both of your hormones are in overdrive, but I can tell your minds are made up, so we’ll be there to support your union,” his dad says, sounding happier.

“I love you, Evan,” his mother says. “Give our congratulations to Mallory as well.”

“Thank you and I will. I love you, too, Mom.” I notice he uses the word mom instead of mother. I like it. I think those old emotional wounds are beginning to heal.

The sheet tighten around his body when Evan moves closer. As we lay there stuffed from dinner, he whispers, “Baby?”

“Yeah?”

“I’m tired.”

“I’m exhausted,” I say. “This day was draining.”

“So you won’t be mad if we don’t… you know?”

“Sleep sounds erotic to me right now. I’m that tired, mentally and physically exhausted. I think I can forgive you this one time as long as it doesn’t become a habit.”

“I think you’re too sexy to let this become a habit.” He slides up the bed and rests his head on the pillow.

I reach next to me and turn off the lamp. I don’t know how long we lay there in the moonlight of the room until we fall asleep—knees touching, holding hands, and together—but together is all that matters.

“I was kind of thinking something a little more tropical,” I say, holding the napkin up to the party planner.

“Tropical?” The planner and Claire ask in unison as if they misheard me.

“Something floral would be pretty,” my mom adds from the laptop. We have her on video chat. I thought it only fair since Evan’s mother was going to be here and I felt I might need the back-up support.

“Yes, a floral with pinks and greens. Like a hibiscus flower on it or something,” I say.

The planner looks at Claire and then leans down toward me and explains, “We usually save those types of linens for luau’s or other tourist events—”

“But that’s what I see in my mind. I don’t want an overly formal setting. I want people to feel relaxed and welcome.”

She disappears across the room and starts pulling more samples. When she returns, I see the one I like instantly and hold it up for my mother to see. She agrees. That’s the one.

Claire says, “This would be lovely on a white cloth and we can get flowers for the centerpieces to match.”

I’m shocked by her willingness to go along with this,
with my vision
. “I think that would be beautiful,” I tell her. She smiles and I feel bonded in that moment like she has finally accepted mine and Evan’s union.

After letting her coordinate the china and silverware with the crystal, she takes my hand and says, “This is so exciting. It’s going to be glorious, Mallory, just glorious.”

When I hug her, she seems surprised at first, but takes the opportunity to return the embrace. “Thank you, Claire.”

“You’re welcome, dear.”

We leave the planners accomplishing a lot. Claire drives me to a coffee shop and we sit out on their lanai enjoying our drinks. Our conversations have come relatively easy and painless so far today, so I like to think we’re moving in a positive direction with our relationship.

“So Mallory, I was wondering if there is any way you might be flexible on the number of guests?” Claire asks, eyes wide, hopeful, then sips her coffee.

I swallow, hard; the sip I took hot as it goes down. “Um, maybe. How many more guests would you like to invite?”

“Just a few more. I was thinking,” she says, looking up at the blue, cloudless sky in thought. “Maybe four hundred or so. Yes, four hundred maximum.” She looks right at me and smiles politely.

“Oh.” Not a great reaction, but I’m too stunned to react differently. I feel my head shaking from the idea before I even know what I’m going to say to her. “Claire, I know—”

“It would mean a lot to the Ashford family and when I was speaking with your mother the other day she was saying that there were people she had always hoped she’d be able to invite. And since the wedding is in Hawaii, a lot of our friends won’t be able to make it anyway, so there wouldn’t be any harm in inviting them, but they’ll take great offense if they aren’t. Do you understand the difficult position I’m in?”

While listening to her plead her case, my anxiety heightens knowing this decision is ultimately up to me. Evan will support me either way. I lean forward, tactfully place my hand on top of hers, and say, “Claire, I understand what you’re saying and I wouldn’t want to offend any of your friends. I know I’m in the minority here, but I never dreamed of a huge wedding. I just dream of being with Evan, surrounded by an intimate group of our family and friends—”

“These
are
our friends, Mallory. Most have known Evan from the time he started school or since he was a baby. They’ve celebrated his birthdays and we spent holidays with them.” She leans closer, her free hand covering mine. “It would mean a lot to me.
Please?
”

Does it really matter if their friends are there? She’s probably right and they won’t come anyway. And she did say Evan knows them and that they’ve watched him grow up. Maybe he’d like them there too, but doesn’t want to pressure me. My family is so small that I never imagined anything big. Plus, I would never ask my parents to spend their life savings on a wedding, but since Evan and his family are footing the bill maybe I should give in on this request. Claire has been supportive of my ideas… I look up and see the hope in her eyes and I decide to compromise. “You can invite two hundred, but that’s it.”

She jumps up from her seat, claps her hands together then comes over and hugs me. “Thank you, Mallory. Thank you so much. I’ll call the planner and give her the new guest list. Everything will be taken care of. I promise. Thank you.”

She hugs me again, and I must admit it feels good to see her so happy.

With most of the details of the wedding now decided or taken care of by others, Evan and I get to spend the next three days enjoying our spring break properly: sleeping in, sunbathing, surfing, hanging out with our friends, making love in the middle of the day because we can, and partying. Time flies, and before we know it, we’re back on a plane to Colorado.