Gravity Happens (Forcing Gravity) (43 page)

Chapter Thirty-Six

Logan

I knocked tentatively on Gretchen’s open office door
. I’d waited long enough to talk to her, and I couldn’t wait any longer.

“Come in,” she said, not looking up from her computer screen.

“Hi Gretchen,” I said, and she gestured for me to take a seat on the couch.

She continued to type for a few minutes before looking up at me. “What can I do for you?” she asked, and I could hear the subliminal ‘hurry up, I’ve got a lot to do’ message in her tone.

“Um, so I wanted to talk to you about the shoot on Friday.”

“The one with you and Jason
?” she questioned, as if challenging me to disrupt her no doubt perfect plans.

“Yes, that one. See, the thing is, I can’t do it.”

Her eyes went cold, but I hadn’t caught her off-guard, so I wondered if she’d been expecting this.

“Why not?”

“Because we broke up, and it was messy, and we’re not really talking right now. I’m not sure I can see him.

I hadn’t seen Jase in almost a month, outside of magazines, of course. He was gracing the cover of
Rolling Stone
that month with the other actors from of
Sons of Sovereignty.
He was shirtless in the picture, and I had to look away whenever I saw it in a store. He’d also been in
Celebrity Weekly
a few times.

My dad let me know each time, and each time he follow
ed up that announcement with the message that he wanted to kill Jase. Just in case I’d forgotten. He was not happy about the reasons surrounding our break up, because he’d trusted Jase, and Jase had failed him.

“I’m aware that you’re no longer together, but I don’t really care. You both have contracts, and I expect you both to be there and act professionally, which in this case will mean acting like you’re in love.”

“But the whole world knows we broke up. Won’t the ad seem a little false now that we’re not together? Wouldn’t it be easier for you to replace me with someone else, someone who might be a better fit?”

She sighed. “Logan, listen, I get that you’re upset. We’ve all been there, but no, I can’t replace you. You’re more than welcome to void your contract, but we will need the advance back, and it will probably not bode well for your future in marketing in L.A. if you do this
to us. I don’t care who your mother is. We might seem like we bow down to celebrities in this industry, but we really don’t. You have to work hard, put in the time, come up with the big ideas, and sometimes you have to do things that aren’t fun, you follow me? You won’t get anywhere with your connections alone. And if seeing your ex-boyfriend makes you uncomfortable, and you can’t get past it, then maybe this isn’t the right career path for you. I guess Suzanne and I were wrong.”

“Wrong? What do you mean?”

She sighed. “We see a ton of potential in you, and that’s the truth. You’ve done a phenomenal job in your internship, and even though you’re just a freshman in college, we wouldn’t be opposed to keeping you on two days a week while you’re in school and eventually finding a home for you here after you graduate. You have a real talent for innovative ideas. I mean, what you suggested at the staff meeting last week when we were talking about breaking in to the tween market was genius. Absolutely genius.”

Yeah, I’d completely stepped into my sister’s mind for that, but Gretchen didn’t need to know that.

“Thank you.”

“But,” she said, dangli
ng the carrot in front of me, “if you back out now, you’re done.”

Shit.
That was harsh.

I sighed.
“Okay.”

She shrugged. “Real world, kid. It’s how it is.”

I took a deep breath, knowing that the right thing to do would be to go through with the shoot. I hated the idea of seeing Jase, not because I didn’t want to see him, but because I didn’t want to be reminded of what I’d lost.

“Fine, I’ll be there,” I grumbled.

“Good,” she said, and turned back to her computer, effectively dismissing me.

*
* *

“Ethan, please,” I begged.

“No,” he said, shaking his head as he took another bite of his breakfast sandwich.

I was sitting across from him at the McDonald’s near his house, because I knew he stopped there most mornings before class,
and even though he didn’t have class that day, because it was finals week, I knew he’d be there. And I was buttering him up. I had to be at the shoot in Malibu in an hour, and I was dreading it, but I was especially dreading going alone.

“Come on. I don’t want to go by myself.”

He shook his head again. “I can’t. I have to meet my sociology study group. We’re doing some last minute cramming for our final that’s at three, and besides, I’m not getting in the middle of this.”

“Why, because Nora wouldn’t like it?”

“Yes,” he said definitively. “She’d hate it, and I’m not in the habit of pissing her off these days.”

“But
you’ve been my friend since we were seven. Don’t I take precedence?”

He raised his eyebrow and stuffed a few hash browns into his mouth. “Thaishonothcashe.”

“What?”

He swallowed his mouthful of food and took a big slug of orange juice. I took a sip of my coffee, not able to stomach much else.

“I said, that is so not the case. I love you, Lo, and you’re my best friend, but she’s my girlfriend, who I just got back together with not even a month ago after I screwed up royally and chose you over her, so I’m not doing it again for something this trivial.”

“Trivial! Are you kidding me?! This is not trivial, and you suck as a friend by the way.”

His shoulders sunk in a way that told me he felt like I was being irrational and he couldn’t reason with me. It was the girl in me coming out, and sometimes he forgot she was in there.

“Lo, you know I’d do anything for you, but not this. I know you just want me there as a buffer, but you’re going to have to learn to be around Jase. You guys have a whole year of this ahead of you, not to mention the fact that you’re going to be on set with him this summer, right?”

I shook my head. “No, I told Luiz I couldn’t do it. I backed out. I think I’m going to go home.”

“Dude, that sucks,” he whined
, and I knew he wasn’t upset about me bailing on the movie. He was sad that I wasn’t going to be in L.A.

I shrugged. “I know. I’ll miss you too, but I’ll be back in the fall. It’s not
like I’m leaving for good. It’ll be just like how it used to be when I lived in Florida.”

“I know, but I’ve gotten used to having you here.”

“Me too, but I miss my dad. I want to go see him and Sasha.”

“How’s she doing, by the way?”

“Fine, I guess. She’s finally over the morning sickness, and I think she finds out what she’s having soon. I’m really hoping for a boy. My dad could use someone on his team.”

He nodded. “That’s true. My mom always felt outnumbered at home, but at least she had Kelly. She really likes Nora too. They get along great.”

“Aww, E, that’s so great. Did you ever think a year ago that you’d have a serious girlfriend who you’d introduce to your family?”

He laughed out loud, showing me the half-chewed food in his mouth. “Hell no, but Nora’s so cool. I love her.”

I smiled. I was happy for him. “She’s so good for you.”

He nodded. “Yeah, I know, which is why I don’t want to screw things up.”

I sighed. “I know. I get it. It just sucks. My stomach’s in knots. I haven’t seen Jase since that day at his house when he kissed me.”

Ethan winced. “That sucks.”

“Tell me about it. It’s going to be so awkward.”

He shrugged. “At least you don’t have to be topless like Nora. I can’t say I was thrilled seeing her pressed up against Cody, but I just kept telling myself he likes dudes, and it made it easier to swallow.”

We’d been at Nora’s shoot the day before, and although I’d been helping out, I got to spend most of the time watching with Ethan.

He
shoved the last bite of his sandwich in his mouth, crumpled up the wrapper, and stood up. “I gotta go. Call me later, okay?”

I nodded
. “I will. You’re still coming over tomorrow to help me move, right?”

The dorms were closing, and Henley and I were moving out. My stuff was going to my mom’s house for the summer. She was going to store what I wasn’t taking to Florida, which was a lot. I was packing light – just a suitcase full of clothes and my surfboard.

“I’ll be there at ten,” he said, then he leaned down to kiss my cheek.

“Thanks. Love you.”

“Love you too,” he called over his shoulder.

As he walked away, I felt such relief that we’d never slept together. We’d kissed – a lot – but I’d been so drunk that my memories of that night were fuzzy at best. And that was a good thing, because the last thing we needed between us was awkwardness.

And we were in a good place
. We loved each other platonically, just as we had for years, and it was what worked. We were so much better as friends.

I looked at my watch. I had to be in Malibu in forty-five minutes, so I figured I’d better leave. There was no telling how bad traffic would be. On the way there, I called my dad, needing someone to talk to so I could take my mind off of Jase.

And when I arrived at the set, I was calmer than I’d been an hour earlier, but it was short-lived when I saw Jase’s vintage Mustang parked in the lot at the section of beach that had been closed off for the photo shoot. He’d gotten there early. Our call time wasn’t until a half an hour later, but I was pulling intern duty for thirty minutes before I needed to get into hair and make-up. My first stop was to check in with Gretchen to see what needed to be done.

“Logan,” she said, half-surprised, as if she
thought I might bail at the last minute.

“Hey Gretchen. What’s going on?”

“Nothing much. We’re all set up, so we can get started early. Why don’t you head over to the tent and get your hair and make-up done.”

I nodded. “
Yeah, sure. I can do that,” I said, my voice sounding slightly shaky.

My nerves doubled when I realized that I wouldn’t have
a time buffer before I would see Jase. I was about to come face-to-face with him.

“Logan,” Gretchen said when I started to walk away. I turned to face her. “Thank you for doing this. I know how hard it is to see someone who hurt you, and please understand that my
hands were tied and my job was on the line when I asked you to not back out of your contract. And because you didn’t, I just wanted to let you know I appreciate that.”

I was so caught off-guard by what she said that all I could say was, “You’re welcome.”

And then she smiled at me. She actually smiled. I considered it a huge win since although Gretchen smiled more than Suzanne, she didn’t do it often.

For some reason what she said to me gave me the resolve to walk forward with my head held high and face what I was dreading. I still dread
ed it, but I felt just the tiniest bit better about how I might handle the situation.

When I walked into the tent, there was a buzz of activity in one corner. I could see Charlie, Gary, Andrea, Erica and some
other people on Jase’s team, along with Lelani, who was working on Jase’s hair. No one turned around when I entered, but as I glanced at him, Jase caught my eye in the mirror and held my gaze for a few seconds before looking away.

“Logan!
” Caesar called out. He was a small, meticulous man who’d done my make-up for the first shoot.

He was back and was b
ooming my name from across the tent as he beckoned me over. I saw Trina, the girl who’d done my hair, standing next to him. Next to her was a rack of clothes that were for the shoot.

I wasn’t sure if anyone in Jase’s entourage had turned to look when Caesar called my name, but I didn’t
look around to find out. I headed straight for the chair and let Trina and Caesar spend the next forty-five minutes making me into the vision Gretchen had created for the shoot. And all the while, I fought to keep from looking over at Jase who was laughing and joking with his team.

He seemed to be in a completely different mindset than the last few times I’d seen him, and I wondered if he was finally over me. Just the thought of that made
me sad, and that wasn’t fair.

In my mind and in my fantasies we were together, but his mistake had prevented us from being together in real life.
But as I heard him laughing, I started to wonder if my fantasies just weren’t good enough for me anymore.

“Five minutes,” I heard Gretchen call into the tent
a while later.

I stole a glance at Jase
, but he was no longer there. It was just Andrea, Erica and Gary hanging out. I shook my head, because I wasn’t sure what I was feeling, and looked back at the mirror where Trina was hair spraying my beachy waves.