Grayslake: More than Mated: Make Her Howl (Kindle Worlds Novella) (4 page)

The rest of the reception had gone by in a blur. Magda went through all the motions until she could finally escape. She could have kissed Mia for refusing to allow her to help clean up, instead sending her home.

Now she was wrapped up in a fuzzy robe and sitting in the window seat in her bedroom, watching first the stars then the lightening sky. Magda tried to press down the memories as she'd always done, but something about Marc had triggered old, buried pain.

Her and Deirdre giggling together. Talking about the new lives they were going to lead, away from the overbearing politics of shifter life. Her own mother had been aghast at the thought of her taking a human mate. Thought she must be wrong, that is was purely lust that would burn out in due time. Being young, running away to elope seemed like the best course of action. Neither of the girls really expected to stay away from Grayslake for long. Once they were married and they'd had their babies, they'd be welcomed back. Except instead of a short exile, two long decades stretched out for Magda.

She tried to pull her mind away from the memory of the accident. But it was like a blur of snapshots overwhelming her. Sounds, the screaming. And so much blood. Then waking up in the hospital. Her secret loss, that she demanded the doctor keep to himself.

A strange hard shell wrapped around her as she lay there, healing. Stuart was gone and she was ashes inside. When anyone from the pack tried to speak to her, she turned away. Everyone said they never meant for it to go so far, for anyone to actually die.

But she'd known what they meant. She was expected to give up her mate, because the Alpha demanded it. That they'd claimed each other was of no matter to that drunken bastard. He was the Alpha. He was to be obeyed. And when he'd asked, no, when he'd
told
her she'd be moving into the pack's house, she stared at him with cold eyes. She understood what his leer meant, she would be away from the protection of her mother. Leaving with a man had made her an adult in his eyes. Someone to be used.

Deirdre held her hand tight and shortly after he left, had everything arranged. Magda smiled at the memory. The sister of her heart simply made things happen. After a few phone calls, they simply walked out of the hospital that night and lost themselves in the human world.

Perhaps if Magda hadn't lost her pup, she wouldn't have blocked herself completely from the shifter world. Or maybe Deirdre, having been an orphan until Grace adopted her, couldn't stand to completely cut herself off. It was something they'd never talked about. For a long time, Deirdre didn't even tell Magda she was writing Grace.

Magda watched the sky turn pink and finally got up. She headed downstairs. If she couldn't sleep, she could at least make some coffee and have some breakfast. Maybe she'd finally beaten her mom downstairs.

Except of course, Grace was fussing over the stove.

Grace said, "I was wondering when you'd finally come downstairs."

"Do you ever sleep?"

"Do you?"

It wasn't a challenge, though. Her mother's tone was soft, almost gentle. Magda slumped in the chair. It was an odd sensation, discovering she wanted to share all of this with her mother.

"Not tonight at least. I couldn't sleep."

Grace put a cup of coffee in front of Magda, then paused, unease written across her face. "Tell me to shut up, or mind my own business if I'm out of line. But, something happened tonight."

Magda nodded.

"When they talked about loss. You were thinking of Stuart."

"It made me think of him, yes."

Grace put the coffee carafe between them and sat down next to her. She said, "You haven't been with anyone since him, have you?"

"I've dated. Even had sex with other men, merely to ease my needs." Magda looked past her mother.

"But they weren't Stuart."

"They weren't my
mate
." Magda refused to let anyone, even her mother, diminish what Stuart was to her.

"Of course not. They never satisfied, quite right, did they?"

"No. It was pleasant enough. But there was never that fire, the connection." Magda slumped back into the chair, past being embarrassed about talking about her sex life with her mother.

Grace said, "But Marc, he makes you feel something, doesn't he? He just has to look at you."

Heat flooded Magda’s cheeks. "How did you know?"

"Child, please. You do know I have eyes? I saw how you looked at him, at the wedding. For a moment, you glowed." Grace grinned and took a sip of her coffee.

"I barely saw him."

"You danced with him, beautifully, I might add. Then, you looked at each other like no one else was there."

"But clearly, other people were there." Magda was embarrassed her mother had seen her so vulnerable.

Grace said, "Well, no one had asked me to dance yet, so I was people watching. But you shut down in that moment, you looked utterly withdrawn as you walked away, like you were pulled back into your shell, again."

Grace let the long silence grow between them, until Magda finally felt compelled to talk. "I did, Momma. I felt that wild, carefree passion and it was so good and so clean. And I hadn't felt like that since the night Stuart died. But I wasn't thinking about him, not at all. All I could think about was Marc. If Jake hadn't started speaking, and broken the moment? I never would have thought about Stuart. And the fact that I hadn't thought of him, that I'd forgotten for a moment, it triggered remembering that night. All I could see was the accident, playing over and over again in my head. The screams and the blood and the pain."

"You've been up the whole night, haven't you?"

She nodded and sipped her coffee.

Grace continued, "There's something more, isn't there?"

Magda winced away from her mother's insight but finally nodded. "It wasn't only that I hadn't thought of him. Everyone else I've been with? I was thinking of him, missing him. And I wasn't. And in that moment, I also realized, when I thought of him? It was from pictures of him. I can't pull up exactly what he looked like from memory. I pull up pictures I have of him. My memories are compromised. How could I forget him? How could I betray him like that?"

Grace wrapped her hands around Magda's. "Oh beloved, that's the cruelty of memory and the salvation of our futures. Memories fade away. So slowly we don't notice. The further away we get from them, the harder it is to see them clearly."

Magda nodded, tears flowing down her face. "But to forget him, he gave up everything for me, including his life. He knew it was dangerous, that he could be killed. That I could shift and easily kill him. But he trusted me. And I
forgot
."

"You didn't forget him, you still remember your love."

"What does it mean that I forgot him so completely with the touch of another man?"

"After over twenty years? That you are still here, still breathing and loving. Do you think Stuart would have wanted you to wither away? To be empty inside, filled only with longing?"

Magda laughed. "He was so kind hearted. I'm sure he'd be absolutely furious with me. How dare I not go on to have a happy fulfilled life. Except, I never met anyone who could even hold a candle to him. So why partner with someone who I didn't love, couldn't love? That would be unfair to them, merely using them."

"Except the good doctor, he gives you pause. You could love him. If you let yourself."

"Well, we're physically compatible, but that doesn't mean I could love him, that I'm capable of loving anyone that way. I don't even know him well enough to decide if I want to know who he is."

Grace said, "Well, you both live in the same small town."

"He's embroiled in pack matters and you know how I feel about that."

"No one will make you join the pack."

Magda snapped, "That's clearly not what Reid thinks."

"Well, it's not up to him." Grace snapped in return, giving her the same attitude.

"For now. He'll be Alpha again one day. I've spent too many years alone to be enslaved by a puffed up male."

"Well, Reid isn't that bad. He's good, inside. Deep."

Magda shrugged. "Says you. He'd still try to force me to his will. And I'd rather be alone than accept that."

"You are under Ty's protection." Her mother pointed at Magda. “Besides, Reid is busy in Brooksville running his own bear clan.”

Magda pursed her lips, trying to make her mother see her point. "So my freedom is at the whim of another man—a bear? I don't care for that at all."

Grace sigh. "I understand. Still, you live in Grayslake now and like it or not, pack life, clan life, it's important here."

"I know that. There are always hierarchies, even in the human world. They'll have no reason to hassle me, I simply want a quiet life." Magda slumped back in her chair. "I want to watch Lira and Jake start a family, free from all the darkness of the past."

Grace said, "And you want to hold a fat, little baby."

"How cute are their kids going to be? Aren't you excited to be a great grandmama?"

"Perish the thought! Although I suppose I could be Super Memaw, if you wanted to be called Memaw."

Magda once more sat in her window seat, looking out over the woods that bordered the B&B. The warm afternoon glow made her restless, like she should shift and go into the woods and run until her paws wouldn't carry her any further.

In the few days since the wedding, she'd been getting more and more edgy. She didn't think she was unhappy with her choice to stay in Grayslake. But something was making her antsy and unable to focus. Puttering around the B&B was nice, but it wasn't like there was anything to do. She actually missed her old job.

There was a soft knock at the door and Nancy said, "Hey Auntie Mags, can I come in?"

She smiled. The bubbly young girl didn't leave a lot of room for angsty brooding. "Of course, dear, come in."

The teen bounced into the room and said, "Memaw said dinner was important tonight. Ty and Mia and Bates and Zoey are def gonna be here." Nancy opened the closet and rummaged around. "Helen and I are gonna watch the baby over at the clan house, so I gotta motor."

Magda's head tilted as she watched the teen riffling through her closet until she pulled a dress out. "Are you planning on asking me to borrow something?"

The teen's face screwed up in distaste. "Uh, no. Not a bit." She gasped and flapped her hands. "Not that you don't dress totally cute, but it's not what I would wear. It's just that Memaw said she wanted you to wear this dress and I figured it was easier to find it than try and describe it." Nancy thrust the dress at Magda and turned for the door. "I'm going to leave and shut up now before I ruin every future birthday ever."

A giggle escaped from Magda and she said, "Thanks for backpedaling so nicely. I appreciate it. Tell her I'll wear the dress."

Nancy smiled at her aunt and blew her a kiss. "Guests should be arriving in about 45 minutes, so slap your best face on!" She paused, slightly unsure and said, "For what it's worth, Memaw actually looked a little nervous about this. I guess this is supposed to develop into some sort of neutral meeting ground?"

Magda said, "I take it she shooed you out of the closet before you could overhear anymore?"

"Well, I mean, yeah." She shrugged her shoulders. "Totally took the book I was reading too. So mean. I was almost done! Now I'll never know if the Dragon of Preor gets his mate!"

With that, Nancy skipped out of the room and ran down the stairs.

Magda shook her head as she laughed and muttered to herself, "I don't remember ever being that young and carefree."

She looked at the dress that had been picked out for her. Interesting. Most of her clothes were on the sleek and modern end, stern suits cut for a fuller figure. This was a splurge for her, a fun and almost flouncy dress. Not what she would have chosen if it was a serious business event.

For a moment, she wondered if she should wear something else, but her mother would have no problem sending her upstairs to change, even if company had already arrived.

Magda put the dress on.

***

Marc paced nervously in the parlor. When Maybelle asked him to be her escort to dinner, he didn't expect it to be at Grace's B&B. And definitely not with all the local shifter leaders. Of course he wasn't going to say no, it would be very rude.

And Magda would be there. Maybelle was no fool, when he'd hesitated, she patted his hand and said, "Oh honey, you won't have to be bored to death by the old biddies. Magda will be there."

His heart sped up. He had to see her again. He'd been trying to casually run into her since she dashed away at the wedding. Marc had been so sure she was going to walk with him, to run wild in the woods with him, until she was suddenly gone.

Which left him standing there, wondering what he'd done wrong. One moment, he could feel her blood surging. She had to feel the mating call he did. But then, she looked like she was a million miles away, then darted away from him without saying a word or giving him a backward glance.

For a moment, he doubted himself. Maybe he was merely feeling boring old lust. Maybe Magda wasn't his mate. But as soon as the thought crossed his mind, he cast it aside. He knew what it felt like, he knew what he felt—what his wolf felt.

He knew Magda was his mate. He had to convince her to give him a chance. When Reid lit into her, he’d sensed the beginning of her shift from across the room. He could have kissed Lira for stopping him and giving him an excuse to whisk her away.

He would have hated the drama of fighting his former alpha.

A sharp pain erupted in his shin and he yelped.

The cane that whacked him was still in Maybelle's hand and she said, "For the love of all you hold dear, stop. You are making me dizzy. Everyone will be here shortly." She pulled the cane away from his leg. "Besides, do you want people to see you all worked up? Try, as the kids today say, to have some chill."

He closed his eyes and took a deep breath before he spoke. "Please tell me you aren't meddling? I’m an adult. Magda is an adult. We don’t need people pushing us together. All you will do is upset her."

Maybelle’s eyebrows shot up into her hairline. "Who said anything about Magda."

He groaned as he realized he'd stumbled into a trap. "Maybelle, please, tell me this isn't some elaborate ruse you cooked up."

"As if! There really is a meeting tonight." Her tone turned serious. "Ty and Bates are trying to establish more frequent, casual meetings. So that when something serious happens, they have better relationships to deal with them. It's far past time to work more closely together."

"So, why am I here? I'm just a doctor."

She clucked her tongue and looked at him like he was an idiot. "You deal with the human world far more than they do."

A deep, male voice interrupted them and said, "For instance, when a shifter shows up at hospital, all the forms that have to be submitted to the state look correct. Ever since the last Hospital Administrator retired, it's been dicey."

They both turned and looked at the door. Ty, Mia and Gran stepped through into the room.

Mia gave Maybelle a big hug and looked at the doctor. "Thanks to you, Ethan's ramblings got his wild tales of a bear shifter discounted."

Marc shrugged, "Well, First Do No Harm. I know he technically should have been killed for learning about the paranormal world. But he was too high profile, that would be too much heat on us. I had to make the call."

Ty said, "You did a good job. I appreciate it. Kept the Southeast Itan off my back."

Marc stepped forward and the men shook hands.

Grace came into the room and Mia said, "And I've been dying for some of Grace's apple pie."

"Flattery will get you everywhere in this house." She glanced at the clock. "Now, where are those wolves already? Bates knows better than to be late for dinner."

At that moment, the doorbell rang. There was a flurry of activity and Marc watched as Magda carefully descended the steps. Time stood still for him and he couldn't look away from the smile on her face. The dress she was wearing made it look like she floated down the stairs.

As she turned to look into the parlor, her glowing gaze drifting around the room, Maybelle smacked him in the shin again. "Have. Some. Chill."