Hamish X and the Cheese Pirates (21 page)

Parveen pulled off his mitten and fished in his pocket for a scrap of paper. He took the stub of pencil from behind his ear and quickly began drawing on the paper as his friends crowded around.

“I've been studying the cliff walls as we approached. Since the island is a volcano, much of the surface will be brittle, volcanic rock. But when a volcano erupts, the lava must flow down channels or chutes. They exist all across the face of the cliff. Our best bet would be to find one of these chutes and use it as a sort of pathway to get up the cliff face.”

“Good thinking, Parveen,” Hamish X said.

“Do not be having any illusions, Hamish X. It will still be a most treacherous climb. I suggest we rope ourselves together. That way, if one of us should slip, the other two might have a chance of saving such an unlucky person.”

“Good idea.”

Hamish X quickly fashioned a rope harness that could join the three climbers at the waist, while Parveen, sketched map in hand, set off to locate a suitable chute to climb.

Mimi sat on a stone watching Hamish X craft the sturdy knots he would need. “I can't believe we made it this far,” she said.

“We're a great team,” Hamish X said. Mimi didn't meet his golden eyes, staring instead at the ground. “What's the matter, Mimi?”

Mimi kicked at some snow. “It was you who got us all this way. And Parveen. I ain't done a single useful thing this whole trip. I ain't been nothin' but extra baggage.”

“Mimi! Don't say that!”

“'Strue! I ain't done nothin' good. Without you, we'd be in the pirate dungeon right now, sure as shootin'. And ya saved us from those poachers. Parveen built the flyer and the snow thingy. I ain't done nothin' to help. I'm just a waste o' space.”

Hamish X laid the rope aside. “Never talk about yourself that way. Never,” he said angrily. “If you don't believe in yourself, how can I? I need you to be tough, Mimi. I need you to be strong. If something happens to me then it's up to you to make sure the kids get out of there.”

“Nothin's gonna happen to you.”

“Anything could happen,” he said. He sat down beside her, lowering his voice. “You've got to believe we can do this. Parveen is a good guy, but he looks up to you. He needs you to be strong. Can you do it?”

Mimi looked into his strange eyes and then nodded.

“Good.”

“Hey, come on,” Parveen's shout broke in, “I think I've found a way up.”

Mr. Candy and Mr. Sweet

Mr. Sweet squatted beside the frozen bear carcass, his head cocked to one side. “It would appear to be Ursus Maritimus.”

Mr. Candy stood by the tent as it shuddered, buffeted by the rotating blades of the helicopter. “Polar bear?”

“Indeed.” Mr. Sweet rose to his feet. “They ran into some poachers, it would seem. An altercation took place.”

The shattered ice had frozen again into a jagged circle where Hamish X's boots had smashed it. Mr. Sweet looked off to the northwest. “The heat signature is very confusing, but they went that way. They were accompanied.”

“He is very resourceful, Mr. Sweet.”

“As he was designed to be, Mr. Candy.”

“Indeed. Shall we continue?”

“Let's.”

They climbed back into the cockpit and the helicopter rose above the ice.

Chapter 24

Their ascent was slow. Hamish X led the way, followed by Parveen in the middle and Mimi bringing up the rear. As they carefully picked their way up a narrow funnel of rock the aurora borealis blazed across the night sky above them, obscuring the stars. Moonlight reflecting off the ice field below helped light the way.

They carried only essentials, having left the bulk of their supplies at the foot of the cliff for the last leg of the journey. It was all or nothing from now on. If they weren't successful they'd end up as prisoners themselves, providing they survived the ascent.

The climbing was difficult. The stone was glassy, sharp, and brittle, tearing their clothes and shredding their mittens. But to their surprise, the rock was faintly warm to the touch, allowing them to use their bare hands for climbing. Parveen suggested it was the volcanic nature of the rock that accounted for its warmth. Here and there they saw water gushing out from the rock face, steaming in the cold air. “It comes from hot springs deep in the earth,” Parveen explained. They laboured upward, hand over hand, foot over foot. Parveen had the hardest time, being the smallest of the three, but Hamish X and Mimi supported him with the rope and they made progress.

Halfway up the face, they reached a very difficult part of the climb, and stood on a metre-wide shelf gazing up. Directly above them and blocking their way was an overhanging ledge. Hamish X called for a halt. “We can rest
here for a few hours. That ledge is going to be hard work and we'll need all our strength.”

No one objected. They sat on the slim ledge, legs dangling as they munched on strips of jerky supplied by Aglucark and his cousins. The mountain blocked most of the wind. Their exertions had kept them sweating in their heavy clothes, leaving them moist and uncomfortable, but the rock was warm. They were too tired to talk and merely sat chewing and staring at the seemingly endless sheet of ice stretching away fifty metres below. The ice glowed in the moonlight, perfect and clean.

“Whatever happens,” Mimi said suddenly, “I'm glad we saw this together.”

Hamish X smiled. “Me too.”

When Parveen didn't answer they looked over to find his head tipped back against the rock, fast asleep. Mimi and Hamish X smiled at each other and snuggled in on either side of their friend, immediately falling asleep.

When they woke, stiff and sore, it was still dark. The moon hung low in the sky. The aurora flickered overhead. They ate a quick breakfast of jerky and some seal broth from a flask. Seal broth is extremely salty, and carries a strong taste of seal.

Hamish X studied the seemingly endless ledge of rock that jutted out and blocked their way. They would have to reverse their progress back down the slope before they could shuffle sideways around it.

“It'll take too much time to go back down and around. We'll have to try and climb here,” Hamish X pronounced. “I'll go first while you two hold the rope. You'll have to give me plenty of slack. I'll pick my way out and over and I'll find something to fasten the rope onto so that you only have to swing out and climb up.”

Mimi and Parveen braced themselves as best they could. When they were ready, Hamish X reached out and grabbed hold of a knob of rock with one hand, then reached out with his other hand and pulled himself out under the rock shelf. He swung his right foot and wedged it in a crack. The soles of his boots seemed to mould themselves to the surface of the rock. Soon, he was clinging like a spider to the underside of the ledge with the rope dangling from his waist. Slowly but surely, he made his way until he reached the lip of the ledge.

Hamish X wrapped his fingers carefully around the rock and let go with his feet. For a moment he was dangling from his fingers alone, looking down through the toes of his black boots at the long drop below. Straining with every fibre of his body, he hauled himself slowly up until he could swing his boot up onto the ledge. He heaved himself up and rolled onto his back, panting and blowing. After a minute of just staring up into the sky, he pushed himself up onto his elbows and looked around.

The ledge he found himself on was about ten metres wide and ran out of sight in both directions. On one side was the vast drop to the ice. On the other was a rock face that looked easier to scale than the one they'd negotiated so far. It was honeycombed, with each opening about a metre across. A path cut through the rock face, sloping up towards the lip of the volcano, their final destination. Hamish X grinned with relief.

He turned his attention back to the strange holes. They were black and impenetrable. A foul stink hung in the air. Hamish X couldn't place it, but it was definitely an animal smell, pungent and rank. And the more he looked at those dark holes, the more a feeling of danger started to grow.

“Hey!” Mimi called. “You all right up there?”

Hamish X wrenched his gaze from the holes and shouted back. “I'm up! There's lots of room here and the climbing looks easier. There's a sort of path that leads to the top.”

He scanned the ledge for a good place to attach the rope. “There doesn't seem to be a rock big enough to secure the line. I'll have to hold onto it and brace myself while you climb.” He planted his feet and grabbed the rope in both hands. “Okay, come on up. I've got it.”

Hamish X felt a tug on the rope and dug his boots into the rock. A few moments later, Parveen scrambled up onto the ledge. He and Hamish held the rope together as Mimi followed. Soon they were all standing on the ledge looking up at the series of holes in the cliff face.

“What do you think they are?” Hamish X asked.

“Beats me,” Mimi said.

Parveen removed his glasses and polished them with a square of cloth from his pocket. He replaced them and squinted. “It appears to be a natural formation caused by volcanic activity. We can't be far from the top of the volcanic cone that makes up the island.” His nose wrinkled. “That smell … Ammonia. And something else. I am reminded of a trip to the jungle with my parents when I was a little boy … Yes. It's monkey.”

There is a saying in Ecuador: Speak of the monkey and he's sure to appear. In the dark recesses of the holes, a chittering, rustling sound began to swell. Seconds later, the caves were filled with small, malevolent faces that seemed almost human but with leathery red skin and prominent fangs. As the children watched, the creatures shuffled out into the light. They had dirty white fur all over their bodies except for their faces and hands. The chittering swelled into a chorus of shrieks as the creatures began to
prance from foot to foot, waving their arms in the air.

“Monkeys!” Mimi said in disbelief.

“Snow monkeys,” Parveen corrected her.

“So that's why they call it Snow Monkey Island,” she said.

“Undoubtedly,” Parveen nodded.

“Uh-oh!” Hamish X added.

The monkeys had retreated into their caves and come out again carrying armloads of dark-coloured pellets about the size of golf balls.

“What are they doing?” Hamish X asked. A second later he got his answer when the monkeys began lobbing the pellets at them.

Wherever the balls struck exposed skin the pain was intense, producing a red welt almost instantly. Amid the onslaught Parveen managed to pick up one of the pellets and bring it up to his nose.

“Just as I thought,” he said. “Frozen dung!”

“They're throwin' their poo at us!” Mimi shouted, trying to shield her face with her hands.
⁶¹

The three children hunkered down under the rain of dung pellets. The little frozen balls began to pile up around them. The snow monkeys pressed forward, shortening the distance and improving their accuracy.

“We can't stay here!” Hamish X shouted.

“What do you suggest?” Parveen said.

“We've gotta make a break for the summit. There's a rough path to the left up through the caves. See it?”

Mimi lowered her arm and squinted. She had time to see a rough path exactly where Hamish X told her to look. Then a piece of dung rapped off her forehead.

“Ow! That tears it! It's time to kick some monkey butt!”

She reached into her backpack, rummaged around, and came up with a lump of leather: her father's baseball glove! She stuffed her left hand into it then grabbed a handful of pellets and jumped to her feet. “How 'bout a little Texas fastball, you dang ugly monkeys!”

Mimi wound up and drilled a fastball right off the skull of a monkey seven metres away. She began matching the monkeys throw for throw, advancing towards the path step by step. Hamish X and Parveen followed her example, and together they pushed the monkeys back. What the trio
lacked in numbers they made up for in accuracy. Mimi's glove flashed like lightning as she caught as many of the monkeys' throws as she could. Soon they'd managed to push their way past the main group of monkeys and were climbing the slope, fighting a rearguard action. Throwing downhill was much easier.

“I think we're gonna make it,” Mimi crowed happily.

They were almost at the top of the ridge. A few more steps would put them out of range. Suddenly, all the monkeys stopped throwing. They slapped the rock with the flats of their pink hands, making a sound almost like a drum roll. They looked past the three children and up the slope. A low, rumbling growl rolled down from above.

Hamish X, Mimi, and Parveen turned slowly and looked up at a huge snow monkey. He stood as tall as Hamish X but was far more powerfully muscled. His fur was filthy and matted. Tufts of missing fur highlighted the scars crisscrossing his flesh from old battles. One of his eyes was gone, the socket a mass of puckered scar tissue. He hunched down, glaring at them with his one hateful eye.