Hamlet (15 page)

HAMLET
    
Wormwood
¹⁶⁹
, wormwood.

Aside?

BAPTISTA
    The
instances
that second marriage
move
¹⁷⁰

     Are base
respects of thrift
¹⁷¹
, but none of love:

     A second time I kill my husband dead,

     When second husband kisses me in bed.

PLAYER KING
    I do believe you think what now you speak,

     But what we do determine oft we break.

     
Purpose is but the slave to memory
¹⁷⁶
,

     Of violent birth, but poor validity,

     
Which
¹⁷⁸
now, like fruit unripe, sticks on the tree,

     But fall unshaken when they mellow be.

     
Most necessary ’tis that we forget
¹⁸⁰

     To pay ourselves what to ourselves is debt:

     What to ourselves in passion we propose,

     The passion ending, doth the purpose lose.

     The violence of either grief or joy

     Their own
enactures
¹⁸⁵
with themselves destroy:

     Where joy most revels, grief doth most lament;

     
Grief joys, joy grieves, on slender accident
¹⁸⁷
.

     This world is not for
aye
¹⁸⁸
, nor ’tis not strange

     That even our loves should with our fortunes change,

     For ’tis a question left us yet to prove,

     Whether love lead fortune, or else fortune love.

     The great man
down
¹⁹²
, you mark his favourites flies:

     The
poor advanced
¹⁹³
makes friends of enemies.

     And
hitherto
doth love on fortune
tend
¹⁹⁴
,

     For
who not needs
¹⁹⁵
shall never lack a friend,

     And
who in want
a hollow friend doth
try
¹⁹⁶
,

     Directly
seasons him
¹⁹⁷
his enemy.

     But, orderly to end where I begun,

     Our wills and fates do so contrary run

     That our
devices
still
²⁰⁰
are overthrown:

     Our thoughts are ours, their
ends
²⁰¹
none of our own.

     So think thou wilt no second husband wed,

     But die thy thoughts when thy first lord is dead.

BAPTISTA
    
Nor
²⁰⁴
earth to me give food, nor heaven light,

     
Sport and repose lock from me day and night
²⁰⁵
,

     Each
opposite
that
blanks
²⁰⁶
the face of joy

     
Meet what I would have well and it destroy
²⁰⁷
!

     Both
here and hence
²⁰⁸
pursue me lasting strife,

     If, once a widow, ever I be wife!

HAMLET
    If she should break it now!

PLAYER KING
    ’Tis deeply sworn. Sweet, leave me here awhile:

     My spirits grow dull, and
fain
I would
beguile
²¹²

     The tedious day with sleep.

BAPTISTA
    Sleep rock thy brain,

     And never come mischance between us twain.

HAMLET
    Madam, how like you this play?

GERTRUDE
    The lady
protests
²¹⁷
too much, methinks.

HAMLET
    O, but she’ll keep her word.

KING
    Have you heard the argument? Is there no
offence
²¹⁹

in’t?

HAMLET
    No, no, they do but
jest
²²¹
, poison in jest: no offence

i’th’world.

KING
    What do you call the play?

HAMLET
    
The Mousetrap
. Marry, how?
Tropically
²²⁴
. This play is

the image of a murder done in Vienna: Gonzago is the
duke’s
²²⁵

name, his wife, Baptista. You shall see anon: ’tis a knavish

piece of work, but what o’that? Your majesty and we that

have free souls, it touches us not: let the
galled jade
wince
²²⁸
,

our
withers
are
unwrung
²²⁹
.

This is one Lucianus, nephew to the king.

OPHELIA
    You are a good
chorus
²³¹
, my lord.

HAMLET
    I could
interpret
²³²
between you and your love, if I

could see the
puppets
dallying
²³³
.

OPHELIA
    You are
keen
²³⁴
, my lord, you are keen.

HAMLET
    It would cost you a
groaning
to
take off my edge
²³⁵
.

OPHELIA
    Still
better, and worse
²³⁶
.

HAMLET
    
So
you
mis-take your husbands
²³⁷
.— Begin,

murderer:
pox
²³⁸
, leave thy damnable faces, and begin.

Come,
the croaking
raven
²³⁹
doth bellow for revenge.

LUCIANUS
    Thoughts black, hands apt, drugs fit and time

agreeing,

     
Confederate season, else no creature seeing
²⁴²
,

     Thou mixture
rank
²⁴³
, of midnight weeds collected,

     With
Hecate’s ban
²⁴⁴
thrice blasted, thrice infected,

     Thy natural magic and
dire property
²⁴⁵
,

     On
wholesome
²⁴⁶
life usurp immediately.

HAMLET
    He poisons him i’th’garden
for’s
estate.
His
²⁴⁷
name’s

Gonzago: the story is extant and writ in choice Italian. You

shall see anon how the murderer gets the love of Gonzago’s

wife.

King stands

OPHELIA
    The king rises.

HAMLET
    What, frighted with
false fire
²⁵²
?

GERTRUDE
    How fares my lord?

POLONIUS
    Give o’er the play.

KING
    Give me some light. Away!

ALL
    Lights, lights, lights!

HAMLET
    Why, let the
strucken
²⁵⁷
deer go weep,

The
hart ungallèd
²⁵⁸
play,

For some must
watch
²⁵⁹
, while some must sleep:

So runs the world away.

Would not
this
, sir, and a forest of
feathers
²⁶¹
— if the rest of

my fortunes
turn Turk with
me — with two
Provincial
²⁶²

roses on my
razed shoes
, get me a
fellowship in a cry
²⁶³
of

players, sir?

HORATIO
    Half a
share
²⁶⁵
.

HAMLET
    A whole one, I.

For thou dost know, O
Damon
²⁶⁷
dear,

This realm
dismantled
²⁶⁸
was

Of
Jove
²⁶⁹
himself, and now reigns here

A very, very —
pajock
²⁷⁰
.

HORATIO
    You might have
rhymed
²⁷¹
.

HAMLET
    O, good Horatio, I’ll take the ghost’s word for a

thousand pound. Didst perceive?

HORATIO
    Very well, my lord.

HAMLET
    Upon the talk of the poisoning?

HORATIO
    I did very well note him.

HAMLET
    O, ha! Come, some music. Come, the recorders.

For if the king like not the comedy,

Why then, belike, he likes it not,
perdy
²⁷⁹
.

Come, some music!

GUILDENSTERN
    Good my lord,
vouchsafe
²⁸¹
me a word with you.

HAMLET
    Sir, a whole history.

GUILDENSTERN
    The king, sir—

HAMLET
    Ay, sir, what of him?

GUILDENSTERN
    Is in his
retirement
marvellous
distempered
²⁸⁵
.

HAMLET
    With drink, sir?

GUILDENSTERN
    No, my lord, rather with
choler
²⁸⁷
.

HAMLET
    Your wisdom should show itself more richer to

signify
²⁸⁹
this to his doctor, for for me to put him to his

purgation
²⁹⁰
would perhaps plunge him into far more choler.

GUILDENSTERN
    Good my lord, put your discourse into some

frame
and
start
²⁹²
not so wildly from my affair.

HAMLET
    I am tame, sir: pronounce.

GUILDENSTERN
    The queen, your mother, in most great affliction

of spirit, hath sent me to you.

HAMLET
    You are welcome.

GUILDENSTERN
    Nay, good my lord, this courtesy is not of the

right
breed
. If it shall please you to make me a
wholesome
²⁹⁸

answer, I will do your mother’s commandment: if not, your

pardon
³⁰⁰
and my return shall be the end of my business.

HAMLET
    Sir, I cannot.

GUILDENSTERN
    What, my lord?

HAMLET
    Make you a wholesome answer: my wit’s diseased.

But, sir, such answers as I can make, you shall command, or

rather, as you say, my mother: therefore no more, but to the

matter: my mother, you say—

ROSENCRANTZ
    Then thus she says: your behaviour hath struck

her into
amazement
and
admiration
³⁰⁸
.

HAMLET
    O,
wonderful
³⁰⁹
son, that can so astonish a mother!

But is there no sequel at the heels of this mother’s

admiration?

ROSENCRANTZ
    She desires to speak with you in her
closet
³¹²
ere

you go to bed.

HAMLET
    We shall obey, were she ten times our mother. Have

you any further
trade
³¹⁵
with us?

ROSENCRANTZ
    My lord, you once did love me.

HAMLET
    So I do still, by these
pickers and stealers
³¹⁷
.

ROSENCRANTZ
    Good my lord, what is your cause of distemper?

You do freely bar the door of your own
liberty
, if you
deny
³¹⁹

your griefs to your friend.

HAMLET
    Sir, I lack advancement.

ROSENCRANTZ
    How can that be, when you have the voice of the

king himself for your succession in Denmark?

HAMLET
    Ay, but
‘While the grass grows’
³²⁴
— the proverb is

something musty.

Enter one with a recorder

O, the recorder! Let me see.

Takes the recorder

to Rosencrantz and Guildenstern

To
withdraw
³²⁷
with you: why do you go

about to
recover the wind of me, as if
³²⁸

you would drive me into a toil?

GUILDENSTERN
    O, my lord,
if my duty be too bold, my love is too
³³⁰

unmannerly.

HAMLET
    I do not well understand that. Will you play upon

this pipe?

GUILDENSTERN
    My lord, I cannot.

HAMLET
    I pray you.

GUILDENSTERN
    Believe me, I cannot.

HAMLET
    I do beseech you.

GUILDENSTERN
    I know no touch of it, my lord.

HAMLET
    ’Tis as easy as lying: govern these
ventages
³³⁹
with

your finger and thumb, give it breath with your mouth and it

will discourse most excellent music. Look you, these are the

stops.

GUILDENSTERN
    But these cannot I command to any utterance of

harmony: I have not the skill.

HAMLET
    Why, look you now, how unworthy a thing you

make of me! You would play upon me; you would seem to

know my stops, you would pluck out the heart of my

mystery
, you would
sound
³⁴⁸
me from my lowest note to the top

of my
compass
³⁴⁹
, and there is much music, excellent voice, in

this little organ, yet cannot you make it speak. Why, do you

think that I am easier to be played on than a pipe? Call me

what instrument you will, though you can
fret
³⁵²
me, you