Happily Ever All-Star: A Secret Baby Romance (70 page)

It was like…he didn’t care.

Or he wasn’t
letting
himself care.

“Cole, I just risked everything to help you.” I chased after him. “We have to talk about it.”

“There’s nothing to talk about.”

“You’re still in the league. It’s just a suspension, I was able to negotiate—”

“You wasted your time.”

I stopped, my stomach knotting in my pounding heart. His words
hurt
.

“None of my time is wasted with you, Cole.” Even my whisper couldn’t slow his steps. “These past few months have been the best of my life.”

His voice hollowed, raw, but flat.

“Then you must be just as broken as me.”

I
didn’t trust
myself drunk, but blacking out would have been safer.

It might have helped me sleep. I wasn’t getting much lately. That made it harder to work out, to lift, to heal. But it was easy to hate myself. Easier than usual.

It was always a laugh-riot to realize what a fucking asshole I was.

Those realizations were generally silenced by on the field or under the weights. Without that exertion, I was trapped in my own straight-jacket of fucked-up emotions.

Was this what it would be like without the game to protect me from myself?

Without the uniform and pads, practices and playbooks, hits and tackles, something changed in me.

No. Something
broke
.

It was like a switch flipped in my head. The rage dissipated, and my mind disconnected in my body. The whole world turned grey. For the first time in my life, I was
numb
.

I’d breathed. I’d slept too much. I’d worked out too little. My head clouded in a thick, sluggish fog. I felt…
nothing
.

I hoped it’d be enough to keep them safe.

I needed to eat, but I had no idea what I’d cram down my throat.

I hobbled through the house. It shouldn’t have hurt that much to cross from the weight room to the kitchen. Was it because I was out of uniform? Every injury and ache I endured through the season surged through me, like it had never healed.

Maybe it was all in my head. Nothing was right in there now. Maybe it tortured me too. Maybe it wasn’t just the anger that made me crazy.

At least this nightmare would only last four weeks.

I stood in front of the fridge. The latch on the side was still a pain in my ass. I learned slapping it a couple times usually dislodged it, and a butter knife worked as good leverage.

But Piper’s hand slipped under my arm, twisting the mechanical release. The door popped open.

I stared at the shelves. Wasn’t sure for how long.

“I can make you something,” Piper said.

Her voice
hurt
me. Her soft melody grated my nerves. I couldn’t face her. Couldn’t look at her.

Couldn’t let myself feel anything more for her.

My throat was hoarse, unused. “I’m fine.”

I grabbed a handful of cheese and meat, but I didn’t want a sandwich. I’d choke it down anyway.

“You didn’t come to bed last night.”

Why was she talking so quietly? Did she think she’d break me with a single conversation?

She probably would.

“No,” I said.

“Where’d you sleep?”

“Downstairs.”

She searched my expression. I didn’t know what she expected to find. “Will you come to bed tonight?”

Already knew the answer to that. “No.”

“Why?”

“Do I have to explain myself?”

I might have been numb, but I felt the coldness in those words. So did Piper.

She nodded. “Fine. I’ll put my things back in my room.”

“Probably for the best.”

“Gonna tell me why?” she asked. “Had enough of me? Got too real?”

“Don’t push me.”

She wasn’t intimidated. “Or what? You’re gonna get angry? You’ll pout? You’ll storm around the house and foam at the mouth like a damn rabid animal?”

“Maybe I will.” I pitched my sandwich into the sink. “Is that what you’re waiting for? You want me to get pissed off? To yell? To lose control?”

“How much longer do you think you can keep it locked inside, Cole? You’ve spent the last week living in this passive, self-inflicted shell. You aren’t keeping it contained. You’re letting it
build
.”

“We’re done talking.”

“Yeah.” Piper shrugged. “Because when have you ever done something that might help you?”

I slammed a hand against the counter. Didn’t even feel it.

“I’m trying to protect
you
, beautiful!”

“And I offered to
help
. I offered to listen. I
want
to be there for you, but you’re the one refusing me. So you know what?” Her voice strained. “I have enough shit to deal with today. I don’t have the strength to convince you that I’m on your side. Just forget it.”

It was too quiet in the kitchen. I listened, hard.

Silence.

I called to Piper before she stormed from away.

“Where’s the kid?”

Her voice embittered. She didn’t bother turning to look at me. “Her father has her for the day.”

The air squeezed from my lungs.

Her father
.

That explained why Piper was on edge. I didn’t blame her. Rose’s father was an asshole. They’d lived in the mansion for weeks, but this was the first time he made an effort to see his daughter.

What kind of a fool refused such a blessing?

I hid downstairs. It was a leg day, and that meant a familiar strain and discomfort. But, even after a few hours of working out, I couldn’t
feel
anything, only numb detachment.

I knew I was in trouble, but it wasn’t like Piper would understand what tortured me.

The suspension didn’t piss me off. It had been the meeting, and the way the league, the Monarchs, and her own father spoke to her. She didn’t deserve their condescension, their sickening
insults
.

She should have defended herself. Instead, this beautiful, stubborn, wonderful woman tried to help
me
. And I refused her. Repeatedly. And all because…

Because I couldn’t let her see the real me.

Because I was too terrified of losing her.

…Because I was in love with her.

The thought was like a kick to the gut.

Not
the time to realize it. Four-hundred pounds of weights rested on my shoulders as I bent in
mid-squat.
Love was the one force in the world that could bring a man to his knees. A panicked drop in the middle of the rep would be what
broke
his knees.

The weights clattered against the bench, locked into place as I collapsed against the ground. I dumped water over my head and waited for the room to stop spinning.

Leave it to Piper to knock me on my ass.

I had no idea it was even possible for me to love someone. Whatever warmed in me for Piper was inspired by a heart that hadn’t beat for anyone or anything…ever.

And the baby?

God, I missed the meatball.

By this time in the day, she was usually tossing herself at the weight room’s baby gate Walking Dead style. She’d press against the plastic mesh, reach her fingers through the holes, and babble about her day, her favorite shapes, and tried to count out ten reps for me.

I might have been miserable without Piper, but I was goddamned lonely without Rose.

My life of quiet and solitude was shattered, and I couldn’t have been
happier
. I
liked
what I felt for Piper. That warmth. The confusion. It quelled the beast and excited the man and proved that I could be…

Normal
.

I showered and dressed, popping up the stairs two at a time to find Piper.

But something was wrong.

It had been weeks since she first paced in the foyer. She peeked between the curtains and grew more and more frustrated as whoever she tried to reach on the phone refused to answer. Her voice cracked with a boiling rage.

“Jasper, I don’t care where you are or what you are doing.
Call me back this instant
.”

Her panic crushed me. She ended the call, waited ten seconds, then dialed again. Her hands trembled as much as her bottom lip. She was on the verge of tears, and that was a swipe of salt poured over my wounds.

I took her hand. “What’s wrong?”

She pushed me away, but her fingers curled in my shirt before she freed herself. “Nothing. Don’t worry about it.”

I didn’t let her get away. “Piper.”

“I’m handling it.”

Yeah, not well. “What’s happening?”

She swallowed the hesitation in her voice, eyes wide and wild. Her hand tangled in the curls that escaped from her ponytail.

“Jasper isn’t back with Rosie yet.”

I checked my phone. “It’s not even seven o’clock.”

“He was supposed to bring her home at
five
.”

That prickling rush of heat and adrenaline returned.

Blinding.

Consuming.

Piper called Jasper again, and she searched out the window for the imaginary car that’d pull up the driveway. It didn’t come, and he didn’t answer. She ended the call and gripped her phone under her chin. She faced me again, her expression crippled with fear.

Fuck. I had to help. I had to do
something
. My knuckles cracked as my hands twisted into fists.

But getting angry wouldn’t fix anything. She needed to be comforted. Someone to support her. Someone to reassure her that everything would be okay—that I would
make
everything okay.

“He’s two hours late. Hasn’t called. Hasn’t texted.” Piper shook her head. “I have no idea where he is with her. What if something happened?”

“Nothing happened.”

“She’s still so little, and he doesn’t understand that she’s just a baby.” Her voice hardened. “She might have choked on her dinner.”

I wasn’t letting her freak out over hypotheticals
.
“The kid inhales her food. Choking would mean missing the meal, and you know she’s not gonna do that.”

“What if she’s hurt?”

“I’ve seen her swan dive off the couch and
bounce
. She’s not hurt.”

Piper nodded, too much, stalked by panic.

“What if he took her?” she whispered.

Five little words that would have us piss ourselves in terror.

No. No way. I wouldn’t let Piper suffer such thoughts.

“What if he’s just an asshole and is stuck in traffic?” I guided her away from the window and into the den. She sat on couch, but she refused to stay still. I knelt before her and took her hand. “He’ll bring her home soon. I promise.”

“I could just
kill
Jasper.”

Not if I got there first. “If we don’t hear from him in a few minutes, we’ll talk about our options.”

Piper probably thought I meant going to the police. I had a better idea, one that included driving to the bastard’s house and ripping him apart, asshole to mouth.

No one upset Piper. No one threatened her baby.

I’d get Rose back to her momma, no matter the cost.

Fortunately, I didn’t have to tape my knuckles. Twenty minutes later, the security system chimed with an alert of an approaching car. Piper leapt off the couch, scrambling so goddamned quick even I couldn’t have caught her.

She raced outside and nearly ripped Jasper from the driver’s side window.

I recognized his type—and it wasn’t Piper’s.

He wasn’t a bad looking man, and he knew it. Popped collars and gold jewelry didn’t disguise his cheap ass taste. He had money. Not a lot of it, but more than most. His Mercedes was a couple years old, and his sunglasses were worn just for the designer name. Piper’s skin was a shade lighter than his, but I still saw more of him than I liked in Rose.

He grinned at Piper and leaned against the car, arms outstretched, like he expected her to fall against his chest.

Piper slapped him instead.

“I told you
five
o’clock!
”

As satisfying as letting her go momma-bear might have been, the baby wailed, red-faced and miserable in her car-seat. Rose needed her mother to stay calm. I pulled her back before she regretted anything she did to Jasper.

“Sweetheart, I said I’d bring Rose home in the
evening
.” Even his smile was slime. He held up his phone. “Besides…look how much you called me. You couldn’t
wait
to see me.”

“You
ignored
my calls?” She clawed the arm I held over her waist, either trying to punish Jasper or to get to her shrieking baby. “Do you know how
worried
I was? I swear to God—”

“Calm down, Sweetheart. Daddy took care of things.”

My blood pressure spiked. “Let Piper take the baby, and get off my property.”

Jasper edged his sunglasses down his nose. “So you’re Cole Hawthorne?”

“Yeah.”

He snickered. “I thought you’d be bigger. You don’t look so tough without your pads—or a penalty flag at your feet.”

I’d snap him over my knee.

I didn’t, but I imagined the sound.

My voice stayed even. Raw, but contained. I wasn’t losing my shit yet. Not when Piper needed me.

“Let her get the baby,” I said. “Unlock the door.”

A heavy moment passed. Jasper tried to hold my stare. He didn’t know the mistake he was making. Didn’t realize the
danger
he was in. I didn’t move, flinch, blink, or threaten. I turned solid as a statue and just as unbreakable.

And he knew better than to fuck with me.

His sunglasses popped back up. He looked away.

“She wouldn’t stop
screaming
all day.” He unlocked the car. Piper dove into the backseat to get to Rose. “If I were you, I wouldn’t be so happy to have her home.”

The kid
wailed
. Her little hands reached out, and she screamed a heart-rending, bone-crushing cry for her momma.

It would be the
last
time that child ever made that terrified sound.

Piper held Rose on her hip, but she pulled her hand away from the diaper. Soaked.

“Jasper, did you change her?”

“She didn’t need it.”

“
All day
?”

He shrugged.

An absolute
fury
darkened her features. “She’s soaking wet and covered in…” Her words shuddered. She blinked, ready to cry. “I can’t even
look
at you, Jasper.”

I could, and I didn’t like what I saw. A baggie of white powder was stashed in his cup holder. The asshole was probably high.

This ended now.

“Take the baby in the house,” I said.

Piper bounced Rose. It didn’t soothe her. “I can handle this, Cole.”

No. She couldn’t. She was too upset, trembling
and
holding the baby in her arms. I ordered her again—gently, so I wouldn’t terrify the kid.

“Take the baby into the house. Get her cleaned up.”

Piper raged, but she stayed silent. She cuddled Rose close and stormed into the house, slamming the door behind her.