Heart Lies & Alibis (2 page)

I grabbed the bottle and made my way up the staircase to our room.

I let my clothes drop as I walked to the dresser. I retrieved some yoga pants and an over-sized sweatshirt. After pulling them on I turned and walked back out of the room. I knew I could not sleep in our marriage bed tonight, if ever again. The guest room was down the hall so I walked there instead. I finished another drink as I flopped onto the bed. I thought Thad a joke earlier but now I knew my own life had become a sorry cliché. How could he have cheated on me on the night before I would be turning forty of all times? Had he really set me up to be a middle-aged divorcé like so many women we knew? Did life have to have such a cruel sense of humor?

By now the bourbon was flowing freely through my body and a much-needed numbness had taken over. But it wasn't enough. I wanted to feel nothing tonight. And after another shot, I felt the blissful fingers of sleep start pulling me to dreamland and I went willingly. I wanted to forget this day and all the shit it had rained down on my life. As I closed my eyes, the last image I saw floating across my mind was of Thad and Amberly and the shattered remains of my marriage. Happy 40th Birthday Reagan I whispered into the dark before passing out.

Sunlight streamed, unhindered, through the guest room windows. Unlike the master, where I had installed special black out curtains because I was not fond of early morning wake ups, the guest room welcomed morning with open arms. Forced to exit sleep, I tried to sit up and was hit with the full effects of my choice to medicate my broken heart the night before with a bottle of bourbon. I groaned, flopping back on the pillow before rolling over and pulled the covers back over my pounding head as I silently wished the day to just go away.

I dragged myself downstairs to the kitchen as the tortures of my hangover ravaged my body. Leaning against the counter I fumbled my way through making coffee and acutely aware that being forty and hung-over was proving to be a hell of a lot harder than when I was twenty-five and recovering from a bourbon soaked night. I dropped into a kitchen chair while I waited. I groaned in relief, pushing myself to my feet when I heard the coffee ding its finish. I knew without a doubt, coffee was my only saving grace at this point.

After I filled a mug, I walked to my favorite chair in the family room and curled into it before I took a tentative first sip, praying my stomach wouldn't reject the coffee. I sighed in relief when nothing happened. As I drank more I took a mental inventory of how fucked up my life had become in less than twenty-four hours. I was supposed to be on my way to a lovely bed and breakfast on the coast for a romantic weekend of wine tasting and love making with my husband this morning. Instead, I was nursing a hangover and planning how I could best dissolve my marriage and likely, my law partnership.

Once the coffee worked its magic and brought me back to the land of the living, I laid out my options. I could sit here alone, feeling sorry for myself all day or I could get my ass up and go out and enjoy my birthday. I knew if I stayed in the house I was allowing Thad to ruin yet another thing in my life and he wasn't worth it. The decision of what to do was easy. Fuck him for ruining our marriage and my birthday with his selfish behavior. I was going to celebrate my birthday if it killed me. My slightly diminishing hangover reminded me death was entirely possible if I had another night like the last one.

But before I could commence with any celebrating, I needed to take care of some business. First, I called a locksmith and arranged for him to come as soon as possible to have all the locks on the house changed. There was no way in hell Thad was coming in this house without my permission ever again. That should piss him off, I thought.

Next, after a shower and another cup of coffee, I called my best friend Grace and gave her a brief rundown of my nightmare. We had been best friends since sophomore year in college and she knew me better than anyone. I shared some of the details but tried to keep it brief. Relieving the moment sucked, yet I had to tell someone. And if anyone could make the best of a bad situation, it was Grace. She soon had me laughing in spite of my misery.

"You want me to go pay him a visit Reagan? Cut off his balls maybe? We could have them mounted above your fireplace, if you'd like." I laughed at the image, enjoying the thought immensely. Grace was the most proper, peace-loving woman I knew. To hear her talk like this lifted some of the darkness of the moment.

She was a child psychologist and had been married for over fifteen years to her college sweetheart. They made marriage look good so I knew it was hard for her to imagine what it would feel like to be in my situation but I knew she was doing the best she could to have my back.

"No, but thanks for the offer Grace. I don't think that would actually help the situation too much. And there is the fact I'm a lawyer and all. I happen to know something like that may be frowned upon by the law. But, I'll keep the offer in mind just in case."

"Well, I have to do something to the asshole. I mean, I always knew he was going to hurt you in some way but I really thought he would be more gentlemanly about it. Maybe divorce you first at least."

Grace and Thad had never gotten along and only tolerated each other for my sake. I sighed wishing she hadn't been so right about him. "He's not worth the jail time, Grace. Trust me. He'll get what he deserves."

"Agreed. So what can I do for you, then? You wouldn't let me plan you a birthday party because Mr. Asshole was taking you away for the weekend but we can't let your big day go by without a celebration of some kind. I know, let's have a girls' night out. Oliver is away for the weekend at a conference and the girls are staying the night with friends so I'm all yours. We can get drunk like we did in college. Maybe try to flirt with some guys." This made me laugh again.

Grace could get drunk on two glasses of Chardonnay these days and had been even more of a lightweight in college, if that was possible. She had never had eyes for anyone but her husband so her flirting skills were a bit limited but I had to appreciate her determination to celebrate with me.

"I would like to go out Grace. Thanks. How about I meet you at Tito's around seven?"

"Okay lady. Sounds good. And chin up, Reagan. Remember you will always have me."

That last part mattered more than she could have ever known. Especially with what life was about to send my way.

Chapter 2

It had been so long since I last went out with the intention of finding a man it took a bit more time getting ready than usual that night. After carefully applying makeup until my hazel eyes really popped and curling and spritzing my auburn hair so it trailed down my back in loose waves, I liked what I saw in the mirror. At 5'10 with an athletic but curvy build, I looked best when I drew attention to my mile-long legs. Skinny jeans and knee high boots did the trick. A silky tank top accentuated my other assets, as they were, but a short fitted leather jacket kept me feeling modest.

I might not have the body of the nubile twenty-four-year-old banging my husband, I thought cynically as I did one final mirror check, but I looked pretty damn good for just turning forty. And I knew without a doubt, I could still turn some male heads in appreciation, just as I planned to do tonight. I heard the cab honk and took one last look before I headed downstairs. New life, here I come, ready or not.

The cab dropped me off out front of Tito's and I made my way inside, scanning the tables near the bar knowing Grace had arrived her usual fifteen minutes early and would already be waiting for me. I smiled when I spotted her at the far end of the room. I weaved my way through the boisterous Saturday night crowd, already enjoying a few male eyes following me through the room. Yep, this was going to be a good night, after all.

When I reached the table I noted Grace looked as stunning as always, dressed head to toe in cream and taupe which set off her mocha skin to perfection. Only Grace would dare wear all white to a restaurant serving salsa. I also knew from experience not a drop would be spilt and she would leave the cantina as pristine as she had arrived. I almost laughed as I looked at her. I would be lucky to leave fully clothed if I had enough margaritas tonight. We were so different it made me wonder how we had stayed friends all these years.

I met Grace in a women's literature class in my sophomore year at university. We bonded over a shared passion for Emily Dickinson and Audre Lorde poetry and a dislike for most of the typical college girls we shared classes with. We found other shared interests over the years we had been friends but in general, Grace and I were like two sides of the same coin - together we were the perfect match but apart we were incomplete. And I needed her tonight more than ever.

I smiled as I reached the table. "There she is and looking as lovely as always." She said as she air kissed my cheek before I took a seat. "I took the liberty of ordering your regular." She gestured to the large margarita already settled on the table. It was on the rocks, with a salted rim, extra lime, and a double shot of Patron. My best friend knew me well. I took a long sip, savoring the tartness of the lime before the burn of the tequila kicked in and I could feel the welcome buzz start to flow. Maybe this birthday could be salvaged after all if the drinks kept coming like this for the rest of the night.

Our waiter returned for our food orders just as I started in on my second margarita. The tequila had loosened me up enough I was now in the mood for some serious Thad bashing.

"You know what really gets me Grace? He couldn't even be original in his adultery. I mean, seriously, banging his legal assistant? It is so cliché it's almost funny. Almost." I said taking another large swallow. "He couldn't have just cheated with one of his frat brothers' wives or maybe the barista at our favorite coffee shop or damn, even a topless dancer at the local strip club would have proved more interesting. But, he always was a little lazy in the love department, so I guess I shouldn't be too surprised at his choice." I gave a cynical laugh and Grace offered a sympathetic smile.

I finished the rest of my margarita and signaled for another. Grace raised an eyebrow but didn't say anything. She had seen me through enough broken hearts over the years to be prepared for this phase of my recovery. The alcohol infused haze wasn't always pretty but it sure was fun. At least before the hangover arrived.

Grace leaned forward and looked at me with concern. "He is an ass Reagan, always has been if you want to hear the truth. Elliott and I always knew you could do better than him but love can have its own plans and you seemed happy for a long time. I'm just sorry it had to end this way." She sipped her Chardonnay and I knew from experience she wanted to say something else but was trying to find the right words that would be the least hurtful or offensive. When she couldn't wait another second a tumble of words spilled from her mouth.

"You don't have to tell me if it is too painful or embarrassing but I really want to hear all the details of actually catching them in the act. I mean were they doing it?!?!" She blurted, leaning forward and whispering the last few words as if someone might hear our "unsavory" conversation.

"Ahh Gracie, you can always make me smile." After taking a large drink of my fresh margarita, I laid out all the grisly details for her. We were both in a fit of giggles when I finished recounting the story. We both agreed it sounded like the plot of a bad Lifetime movie, which made it all the more embarrassing.

"Had my life really been reduced to this disaster?" I asked Grace when we stopped giggling. She gave me a sympathetic smile and a nod. I groaned and drank some more margarita.

After leaving Tito's, I convinced Grace to have a nightcap with me somewhere before we went home. We were in the cab headed to another bar we knew when I spotted a small Irish pub. It was the type of place I liked to frequent when I was younger but had never been Thad's type of place so I hadn't been to one in a long time. But it no longer mattered what Thad liked and didn't like.

I told the cab driver to pull over and we went inside. It was exactly the type of place I needed on a night like this and I instantly felt better. The inside of the pub was perfect. One wall was taken up by a long wood bar, there was a tin ceiling, and lots of leather stools and some booths, and in the far corner a couple of guys were playing some fun Irish tunes. Though the clientele was young and casual, I felt right at home. Grace, on the other hand, was a little less thrilled.

We choose a booth near the bar so we could still talk but also enjoy the music. A friendly waitress came by and I ordered a double Jameson on the rocks while Grace chose an Irish coffee, light on the whiskey of course. She was already looking tired and ready for the night to end so I assured her after one drink and we could leave. That was my plan but then I glanced around the pub and met some eyes behind the bar that had me thinking a change in plans might become necessary.

The owner of the eyes was tall, broad shouldered, with wavy black hair and a slight stubble on his chiseled face. His arms had some tattoos I couldn't quite make out but was enjoying how they highlighted his olive complexion and muscular structure. Oh my, was he exactly not my type since leaving my wild days behind after law school and yet he was perfect. I knew he couldn't be a day over thirty, if he was lucky, but damn he filled out his jeans in just the right way it really didn't matter. Was this the distraction that could help me forget Thad?

I was so lost in undressing the bartender with my eyes, I didn't hear Grace talking to me.