Heartbeat (23 page)

“I'll bet they're happy to be here.”

“I hope so. I sure am happy to have them. I'm bringing them to work tomorrow for a while, till they destroy the place. Adam is always fascinated by it, he thinks he wants to be a director when he grows up, but Tommy gets a little antsy. I thought maybe we could stop by and say hi, or take you to lunch if you have time. Depending on how your day runs. The boys would like to meet you.”

“I can hardly wait to meet them.” She smiled, but she was nervous about it too. The boys were
so
important to him that she was worried about what would happen if they didn't like her. Admittedly, she and Bill weren't deeply involved with each other, but she liked him a great deal, and she sensed that he liked her too. If nothing else, she hoped it was the start of a serious friendship. And there were overtones of something more, but something that, for the moment, due to her circumstances, neither of them had figured out how to handle. Too much had happened to her recently. Too much had gone on. Between the baby and Steven filing for divorce, she wasn't ready for a relationship. And yet, she was growing used to him. And she found that she needed him at unexpected times, and in some ways, she was afraid to need him as much as she might, if she let herself go completely.

“Do you want to come to the set after we air tomorrow, or should we just stop by at the newsroom?” he asked. He had told them about her, and they hadn't seemed surprised. They had met ladyfriends of his before, and they were used to it. They usually told him what they thought of them, and a couple of them had joined them on trips. But it was hard for him to explain to them that this one was different. This was a woman he respected and liked, someone he suspected he could love, but he didn't tell them any of that. He didn't want to scare them.

“I'll drop by the show. I want to see what you're doing to those poor people anyway. How's the one with the illegitimate baby?”

“Drinking too much, understandably. Everyone wants to know who the baby's father is. We've never gotten so much mail. It's amazing how that kind of thing fascinates the viewers. Dubious paternity seems to be an issue of interest to most of us. Or maybe it's just babies.” He was hitting close to home again, and just hearing about it made her nervous. Her own baby's paternity was a cause of great concern to her, and she sighed as she realized that she had to get to the control booth.

“I'll see you tomorrow. Say hello to them for me.”

“I will,” he said, with something warm in his voice that was meant just for her, and she knew it. She was smiling to herself when she ran into Zelda on the way to the control booth.

“How's it going?” Zelda asked pointedly. She worried about Adrian at times, but they were both too busy to talk to each other very often. Zelda asked her if she heard from Steven from time to time, and she was always horrified to hear that she didn't.

“It's okay.” Adrian smiled. She knew Zelda wouldn't give away any of her secrets.

“I saw you with Bill Thigpen the other day.” She was curious about that. She knew who he was, and how successful his show had been, and she wondered if anything was going to come of it between him and Adrian, but she suspected that Adrian was still deluding herself about Steven. “Is that anything?” she asked openly, and Adrian looked offended by her bluntness.

“Yes. A nice friendship.” She hurried off to the control booth then, and at midnight she went home and fell into bed. She was too tired to even think, and she had a lot to do in the next two days before she left on vacation.

She went to Bill's studio again the next day, just in time to see the show air, and she watched in fascination as the woman who was supposedly pregnant sobbed, talking about her baby. Her husband was still in jail, and she was being blackmailed by a woman who allegedly knew who had fathered her baby. Her husband's trial had just begun, and Helen was still mourning the loss of her sister. It was easy to see why people got caught up in it. It was all so absurd, and so exaggerated, and yet it wasn't. It was exaggerated in just the way real life was, with all its unexpected quirks and turns and sudden disasters. People having accidents and getting killed and cheating on each other and losing jobs and having babies. There was a little more melodrama than in most lives, but not as much as one might have thought, Adrian mused, not if her own life was anything to judge by.

And as soon as she walked into the studio on silent feet, she saw the two boys, standing near Bill, watching the actors in fascination. Adam looked tall for his age, and he was standing quietly right next to his father, with sandy blond hair and big blue
eyes
_y
and long, long legs. He was wearing jeans and a T-shirt and high top sneakers. Tommy was wrapped around a chair in a cowboy shirt and a pair of chaps, with the exact same look on his face that Bill wore when he was concentrating on something. They looked almost like twins, except that one of them was much smaller. And just looking at Tommy made you want to rim up and hug him. He had soft brown curls, and blue eyes that were even bigger than his brother's. He noticed her first, and stared at her with curiosity instead of watching the show. She smiled at him then, and waved, and he grinned, and tugged at his father's sleeve. He whispered something to Bill, and then Bill turned and saw her. He didn't walk over until they broke for a commercial and then he quickly introduced her before they had to be quiet again. Adam shook her hand with a serious air, Tommy grinned and asked if she was the one who was coming to Lake Tahoe. She only had time to whisper yes, and then found herself stroking his soft curls as she watched the rest of the show, but he didn't seem to mind it.

“That was good, Dad,” Adam complimented him as soon as the show was over. And Bill introduced him to all the actors. He had met most of them before, but there were a few new faces, and it touched Adrian to see how proud of them Bill was. He was clearly a wonderful father.

Tommy was climbing on one of the cameras, while Adrian watched, and she noticed that he was keeping an eye on her while pretending not to. Eventually, they all went out to lunch, and over sandwiches, Tommy looked at her squarely.

“How long have you known my dad?” he inquired as Adam frowned at him.

“Tommy, stop that! It's not polite to ask questions.”

“That's okay.” She smiled at both of them, and tried to remember. It depended when you started counting. From the first time
in
the supermarket, or from when they began to make friends. She wasn't sure which to tell them, and decided to go with the former. It made it look as though they had known each other a little longer. “A couple of months, I guess. Something like that.”

“Do you go out with him a lot?” Tommy went on, as Adrian grinned and Adam shouted at him to stop.

“Sometimes. We're good friends.” But he had spotted something of interest on her left hand, and he was staring at it as she ate her sandwich.

“Are you married?”

There was a long, long pause, and she avoided Bill's eyes. She wanted to be truthful with them, but this wasn't going to be easy.

“I am.” She still wore her wedding ring. She couldn't bring herself to take it off. Bill had noticed it, too, but had never said anything, and wouldn't have had the courage of his younger son to ask her to explain it. And then, “I was,” she corrected.

“Are you divorced?” This time Adam chimed
in
curious about the line of questioning his brother had started.

“No, I'm not,” she answered quietly. “But I will be.”

“When?” His innocent questions went straight to her heart, but she did her best not to show it.

“Maybe around Christmas.”

“Oh.”

And then Tommy again. “Why do you still wear your wedding ring? My mom wears one like that,” he volunteered, “only bigger, and it has a diamond.” Adrian's was narrow and simple and she had always loved it.

“It sounds beautiful. I wear mine because …well, I guess I was just used to it.” She had thought about taking it off in the past month, but couldn't bring herself to do it.

“Did you want to get divorced?” Adam asked then, and Bill decided to step in and get her off the hook. Enough was enough.

“Hey, guys, give the lady a break. Tommy, pay attention to what you're doing or you're going to spill that soda.” He rescued a can of root beer from him and looked at Adrian apologetically. He hadn't planned to subject her to the inquisition. “I think we owe Adrian an apology. Her private life is none of our business.”

“I'm sorry.” Adam looked at her remorsefully. At nearly ten, he knew better. But he'd gotten carried away with what his younger brother had started.

“That's all right. Sometimes it's better to ask about things instead of just wondering. I would have told you if I didn't want to answer.” She didn't answer his question, though, about whether or not she had wanted the divorce. It was still too painful. “What about you?” She looked at the boys seriously. “Have either of you ever been married?” Adam grinned and Tommy guffawed. “Come on, I told you, now you tell me. What's the story?” She looked from one to the other as they both started to laugh and Tommy was the first to volunteer information.

“No, but Adam has a girlfriend. Her name is Jenny.”

“It is
not”
He looked annoyed and gave his brother a shove, as Adrian watched them.

“It is
tool”
Tommy defended his veracity. “He used to have a girlfriend named Carol, but she dumped him.”

Adrian laughed at him, and looked at Adam kindly. “It happens to the best of us.” She smiled. “And what about you?” She turned to Tommy. “Any girls we should know about? I mean, if we're going to be friends, you probably ought to tell me.” They were the same principles they had applied to her, and she enjoyed teasing them a little bit, as Bill watched her. She was sweet and warm and open with them, just as she was with him. And he started to fall for her all over again. She was terrific.

They chatted through lunch, and Adrian hated to leave them and go back to the office. She invited them to come and visit the newsroom, but she didn't invite them to watch the show later that day. Some of the reels they had gotten in were just too grim, and she didn't want them to see that. But she showed them the studio and the editing rooms, and introduced them to everyone, including Zelda, who glanced at them, and their father, with interest. She questioned Adrian as soon as they'd left and she was back in her office.

“Could this be getting serious?”

“Not likely,” Adrian said coolly. After all, Zelda knew she was pregnant. But she also knew that Steven had left her. “Under the circumstances.”

“He could do worse.” She looked pointedly at her friend. “Hell, nowadays there's no such thing as a virgin.” Adrian laughed out loud at what she'd said. That was certainly one way to view it.

“I'll remember that if I ever feel the inclination to start dating.” But that wasn't how she viewed her friendship with Bill Thigpen. She liked him a great deal, and if she thought about it, she had to admit that she was attracted to him, but she never felt as though that was the issue. They were just very comfortable with each other, and they had a lot in common. And she thought his kids were terrific. She was really getting excited about their trip now. And she was thrilled to have been asked to join them. It was going to be wonderful to get away on a vacation. She thought of dropping Steven a little note, to let him know where she'd be, and then she realized how ridiculous that was. He wasn't even speaking to her, and he had filed for divorce, he was hardly likely to try to reach her. And if he changed his mind and decided to come home, he would certainly call her office to find her. So she left a memo with Zelda and the manager of the newsroom with a list of the hotels Bill had given her. But she doubted very strongly that anyone would call her. And as she went back to her desk again, she thought of Adam and Tommy's questions over lunch about her wedding ring and her divorce, and whether or not she had wanted to divorce Steven. And then, as they got busy before the evening news, she forgot all about it.

She saw them again the next day, when they dropped by and Bill asked her if she had a sleeping bag. He had just discovered that he only had three and wanted to know if he should buy one.

“Gee, I don't,” she said apologetically. She hadn't even thought of it, but he assured her it was no problem. And he had everything else. He told her to bring one decent dress for when they went out, and a warm jacket for the nights at Lake Tahoe.

“And that's it?” she teased. “Nothing else?”

“That's right.” He smiled and stood close to her, enjoying the thrill of feeling her next to him. It was getting harder and harder to keep his distance. “Just a bathing suit and a pair of jeans.”

“You're going to get awfully tired of me if that's all I bring,” she warned, but Bill shook his head as he looked at her warmly.

“I doubt it.”

“What about games? Is there anything you gentlemen like? Scrabble? Bingo? Cards?” She had already made a list to herself to pick up a few things to amuse them on the car trip. And Tommy immediately placed an order for comic books and a squirt gun.

“Never mind that!” Bill admonished them, and then they left again. They had some last-minute shopping to do too. They were leaving the next morning.

She packed that night when she went home after the evening news, and when she went back to do the late show, everything was ready and standing at the front door. Her two small bags looked strange in the empty apartment. It looked as though she was finally leaving too. The place was so depressing now that it was empty, and she thought about buying some furniture from time to time, but somehow she just couldn't bring herself to do it. It would make everything so final and there was always the possibility that Steven would come back with everything. And in any case, in a few months she was going to have to give up the apartment. But it wouldn't hurt anything to have a little furniture in the meantime. She just didn't have the time or the desire to buy it.