Heartwood (9 page)

The jab about her baking wasn’t totally unexpected; she’d been building a bit of a reputation—and earning quite a bit of money—for her new undertaking, and she’d had a feeling he was resenting it. Now she knew he was. He also resented her for being “unrelentingly perky,” as he put it. He never seemed to realize that sometimes being cheerful took a lot of willpower.

–—

Robby’s only solace was his popularity with the students he taught. And as his confidence continued to plummet, he seemed to forget that it was his knowledge and love of his subject that had originally won them over. Now he wanted to be their friend.

“I’m effective because the kids feel that I’m like them,” he told Laura. “They know I’m not some dried-up academic type.”

But he wasn’t supposed to be like the kids. He was supposed to be the adult. It was part of his job to maintain a line between
himself and his students, but he’d been blurring that line out of his own neediness. So finally, predictably, there had been a disaster.

A female student—a sad-eyed girl who had serious emotional problems—later everyone would agree on that—mistook Robby’s friendliness for something more passionate and developed a desperate crush on him. When she finally realized her feelings were not reciprocated, she made a halfhearted attempt at suicide.

No one believed that Robby had actually had an affair with the girl, but her father accused him of encouraging her. Since the man was an alumnus of the school and a major fund-raiser, Professor Hawkins had been forced to defend Robby and endure some very unpleasant moments on his behalf. To his credit, he had never considered abandoning Robby, but after the girl was safely off campus, he had given him a blistering lecture on inappropriate behavior and lack of judgment. Instead of taking any of this to heart, Robby announced angrily that Laura had been right all along about Hawkins.

“He is a total egomaniac, just like you said,” he fumed. “He was furious, just because he had to defend me to the dean! And now instead of being on my side, he told me to stop socializing with my students. Do you believe that? That girl was disturbed, and I’m being blamed for it. Why, there isn’t a professor or an instructor on this campus who hasn’t gone out with the kids for an occasional beer or pizza. That’s all I ever did. You know that, Laura.”

Yes, but I also know that you blurred the line
.

–—

After a few weeks, as always happens in such cases, the incident and the sad-eyed girl with the emotional problems had faded from most people’s memories. But there was still a black mark against Robby’s name. And Professor Hawkins had seen for the first time that the young man he counted on to do his dirty work and make his life easier could be a liability. So from that point on, it was essential that Robby be on his best behavior. And he had been very careful. He skipped his usual Friday night beer with the kids at their favorite bar, and he never dropped in on the pizza parlor or any of their other favorite haunts anymore. But Laura knew he was feeling abused, and she was worried. When Robby was in that mood, there was no telling what he’d do.

–—

Laura must have pulled too hard on Molly’s tangles because the dog gave a little cry and moved away. Laura stood up and got a biscuit for her as an apology.

Was that one failed exam the cause of everything that followed?
Laura wondered as Molly crunched contentedly at her feet.
Did that destroy his courage so much that he never got it back?

But that was ridiculous. Because life was full of failures, and overcoming them was what made you grow. One single fall could never destroy your courage—or your self-confidence—unless they had been shaky all along. So there had to have been something in Robby from the start, a weakness she had missed in the smart, handsome, but untested young man she had loved and married. She still loved him, but now it was a love mixed with pity. And that was not a good thing for any spouse to feel.

“I’m glad Robby and Katie and I are going to my home for
Thanksgiving,” Laura told Molly. “It will be good for Robby and me to get away from here for a few days.”

That was when the phone rang. And in an instant the world spun one hundred and eighty degrees. When it stopped, there was no ground beneath her feet.

“Laura, do you think you could get an earlier flight out here?” It was Jimmy on the phone, his voice too controlled, too calm. “Dad has had a heart attack.”

T
he next few hours were a blur of activity punctuated by phone calls. There was a call to the airline to change her flight time, and more calls to cancel the tickets for Robby and Katie, who would be staying home now because Laura didn’t know how long she’d be needed in New York. There were calls with Jimmy and Janet for updates on her father’s condition—he was stable—and with Phil who reported that Iris was in shock and he was almost as worried about her as he was about their father. There was a call from Steven, who was on his way from Washington with Christina. This had prompted a second phone call from Phil because Iris was upset about Christina coming.

“Mom doesn’t like Christina, and she doesn’t need this right now,” Phil said. “What the hell is Steve thinking?”

“Maybe that he
does
need Christina right now?”

“Well, he shouldn’t have done it, because Mom’s in bad
shape, and this is too much for her. I don’t care if she is being unreasonable. When are you going to get here?”

It was the same question Steve asked when he called her twenty minutes later. Jimmy phoned to ask her again an hour after that.

And throughout it all, the terrible fear, the phone calls and the unpacking and repacking—no need for the springform pan now—Laura tried not to let herself think about the fact that Robby had gotten his way, after all; he wouldn’t be spending Thanksgiving with her family.

–—

Her plane left that evening. Laura sat upright in her seat, not even trying to sleep, because she knew it was out of the question. She’d called Janet for the last time from a telephone in the airport and learned that her father was “resting comfortably” and she clung to the words. She blocked all thoughts of a scarily sick Theo lying on a narrow white bed, with the smells and sounds of a hospital swirling around him, and instead she forced herself to imagine him “resting comfortably” in a sunny room with a pile of his favorite books on the bedside table and music by Verdi playing gently in the background. For the six hours that the flight lasted she hung on to this fairy tale, until the plane finally started circling for its descent at Kennedy Airport.

It was early morning when she landed. Assuming that everyone in the family would be at the hospital, she hadn’t expected anyone to meet her. But as she walked out of the gate she heard someone call her name. She turned and saw a young woman with bright blond hair. Her small face was dominated by round hazel-colored eyes and a full mouth. A slight overbite kept her from being truly pretty, and the pantsuit that she was
wearing was a shade of purple that could only be described as electric.

“I’m Christina,” she said as she came to shake Laura’s hand. So this was Steve’s girl. “You’re Laura. I’ve seen pictures of you all over your parents’ house. Stevie and I just got here a few hours ago, and he thought you’d like to have someone pick you up.”

“Thanks. That was very nice of you. And Steven,” Laura said, thinking to herself that her brother, who was no fool, had probably seen how upset his mother was, and he’d grabbed this opportunity to keep his lady love out of her hair.

“Sure. Let’s get over to baggage claim,” said Christina and she led the way, walking amazingly fast on high-heeled shoes that looked like stilts.

Christina was an excellent driver, negotiating the mazelike exit from Kennedy Airport with ease. Laura suspected that she was probably equally good at most mundane tasks. Laura’s brilliant brother, Steve, on the other hand, couldn’t balance a checkbook and regularly locked himself out of his car and his house. Laura began reassessing Steve’s disastrous choice.

When they were finally clear of the airport, Laura drew in a deep breath and asked the question that she’d been refusing to think about on the plane. “How did it … the heart attack happen? Do you know?”

“Like I said, Stevie and I just got here ourselves so we weren’t around when he had it. But the way I understand it, your mother and father were putting groceries in the refrigerator when he felt the pain. She called your brother James, who told her what to do for him until the ambulance got there and they brought your father to the hospital out in Westchester until he wasn’t in danger anymore. Then your brother and your sister-in-law—I think her name is Jane …”

“Janet.”

“Right. They had your father moved to the hospital where they work in Manhattan.”

“And Dad … is all right …?”

There was a pause. Christina was trying to figure out what to say. A cold finger ran down Laura’s spine. She wanted to cry, but if she started, she wouldn’t stop and what good would that do?

“Before I got on the plane, Janet told me he was doing well … Did something happen during the night? Did he take a turn for the worse?”

“No, no, nothing like that. Your dad is going to make it.”

“Thank God.”

“But there was some damage. The doctor … the cardiologist told your mother and your brothers that this morning … he said there will have to be some big changes. Your father can’t work anymore—it’s too much for him. And there was a whole lot about his diet and he’ll have medicine he has to take …”

“But he can live with this.”

“If he takes good care of himself.”

Laura leaned back, the tears wouldn’t be stopped now. It wasn’t a death sentence. Theo could live with this. “Thank you,” she said. “How did Mom react?”

Again there was a pause.

“Christina?”

“Look, it’s none of my business, but … your father has been asking … for details about what happened …”

“He would. I’m sure everyone knows that he’d want to have as much information as he could.”

“But your mother … she said no one should tell him about … the damage.”

“What?”

“She doesn’t want your dad to find out. She’s told everyone, including your father’s doctors, that they can’t say a word about it.”

Her mother was giving crazy orders like that? She
was
in bad shape. Very bad shape.

“The thing is, your father really wants to know,” Christina continued. “He keeps asking and asking. I think it would help him to know what he’s facing.”

“Of course it would! Mom isn’t thinking …” Suddenly, Laura felt a need to explain this bizarre behavior to a person who was a stranger to the family. “She can’t imagine life without Dad, so she’s panicking.”

“Oh, I understand. I’d be insane if it was Stevie.” Christina’s hands tightened on the steering wheel at the thought. “My life started when I met him. That’s how I feel—you know?”

“I guess.”

But Laura didn’t know. That was a guilty little secret she’d always kept to herself. Even when she was newly in love with Robby, she hadn’t needed him the way her mother had always needed her father. And, it seemed, the way Christina needed Steve.

–—

They were approaching the George Washington Bridge now; Laura looked out the window at the tangle of traffic as drivers tried to cut each other off to get to the entrance three seconds earlier than the person in the car next to them. Suddenly, Christina said, “When we met, your mother didn’t like me.”

Oh God
. “I’m sure she—”

“It’s okay. It was all my fault. I got off on the wrong foot
with her. You see, I was scared. Stevie really didn’t tell me much about your family before we went to visit them … well, you know how he is.”

Laura nodded. She knew exactly how “Stevie” was and how little help he would have been in preparing his girl for the ordeal of meeting his parents.

“I knew your father was a doctor and your mother was a teacher at a university, and I’m not very well educated, so I was okay with them not thinking I’m smart enough for Stevie, which I’m not …”

“Most of us aren’t.”

“But when I saw those candlesticks and that ring your mother wears … I wanted her to know that I wasn’t some hick who doesn’t know the value of nice things. So I said the ring was probably worth about twenty thousand, and that was the wrong thing to do. Stevie told me so later. He said his mother didn’t like to talk about money and what things cost.” Christina chewed her lip. “That was the problem.”

“What was?”

“You have to be really rich not to care about what something costs. Stevie never said his mother came from that kind of money.”

“She didn’t. You know that ring you admired? My grandfather had to pawn it during the Depression. My mother loves that story, get her to tell it sometime.”

“Are you kidding? I’ll never talk to your mother about that ring again. I learned my lesson.” Christina chewed her lip again. It seemed to be a nervous habit. “I just wish I could convince her that I’m not after Stevie for a meal ticket. And please don’t try to tell me she doesn’t think that, because it’s what I’d think if I were her. And it’s true, I do love beautiful things—like her
candlesticks, and all those pictures on the walls in her house … I wish I could afford things like that. But I know I won’t, certainly not if everything works out with Stevie and me. Making money doesn’t matter to him. He loves what he does and I’d never ever try to make him be any different.”